Most people have that moment of strange peace when they wake up after getting stabbed. That moment of disorientation when they don’t know where they are, what happened, or what condition their body was in. It must have been bliss.

I was not most people.

I awoke to a hot burn on my side, my pulse overly loud in my ears, and a terrible need to shoot a hole through that damn beeping machine. I suppose that’s what happens when somebody stabs you.

I peeled my eyes open, the surface of them feeling dry and irritated as a dim light glared back at me. Moving on, I lifted my sheets and managed to tug the long skirt of my gown up without shifting too much on the bed to take a peek at my injury. A white bandage wrapped around my waist, and as I ran my fingers across the surface, I brushed the sutures holding the wound closed. It wasn’t big, maybe a few inches long at the most. But the skin around it was purpled even beyond what the bandage covered.

I looked for the clicky thing for the morphine drip. I had one next to the bed and checked the levels of morphine being fed into my veins. I was relieved when I realized that it wasn’t that high, meaning my wound didn’t seem to have caused too much damage or I would have been in a lot more pain. Moreover, judging by the location, a few inches above my hip to the left of my stomach, it didn’t seem to have been near any major organs beyond that of my intestines.

I took a breath, noting my cotton mouth, and put my gown and sheets back down.

As I looked up, I noticed for the first time the huge, bowed body in the corner of the room. Wolf’s size was hard to miss even in the space of the obviously private room. Shadows draped over him, the light from the early dawn not enough to fend them off. His long hair had fallen forward in front of his face, hiding no doubt an exhausted expression.

I knew his character enough to know he hadn’t left that spot since I was brought in here. The cold and untouched coffee cups and the way the chair cushioned around his body supported my conclusion. He was wearing different clothes since the party, which I suppose I owed to Kay. She was probably the only woman to be able to kick his ass into gear.

I fought my chuckle. I probably wasn’t in a position to laugh, but after waking up after being stabbed, seeing Wolf exactly how I would expect him to be was comforting. He was such a straight arrow.

I shook my head, fighting my smile as I glanced around for something in grabbing distance. I found the television remote on the small bedside table and reached for it. I bit down on my lip at the sting of the sutures pulling and fought not to hiss aloud as I managed to pick up the small device.

And then I threw it.

The plastic made a loud crack as the projectile bounced off his skull and clattered against the floor. It was followed by a sharp screech as Wolf’s chair flew backward into the wall, black skid marks marring the plain white linoleum.

“Morning, Sleeping Beauty.” I smirked, his wide, animalistic eyes flashing as they hit mine. He was intense, rabid, and I watched as his senses came back to him. The change on his face was the telling of a dramatic movie, going from shock to surprise to fraying at the seams.

“Anna,” his hoarse voice cracked. Those deep whiskey eyes were ringed red, and the sharp features of his face were hollowed into the exhausted pallor I had expected.

He moved faster than my eyes could track, and before any pain or discomfort could hit me, I felt his warmth swallow me whole, his shaking form surrounding my small frame in an instant.

“I got you, Anna. I got you,” he whispered in my ear over and over.

“W-Wolf,” I breathed, my voice thick and stuttering. “L-let g—”

“I’m not letting go, Anna,” Wolf growled. “Never again, you hear me? Never. Again.”

And that’s all it took.

A few simple words, and my calmness was torn from me.

The moments of my stabbing came back to me, my eyes having wanted to catalog every part of Wolf, but for the life of me, I couldn’t remember. I couldn’t remember what he looked like, what he smelled like, what he felt like. I remembered nothing.

I was side swiped by the wave grabbing me by the heels and dragging me under. My lips trembled, my body shook, and my heart squeezed into a tiny, heavy pebble in my chest as everything hit me at once.

“Wolf,” I whimpered, my fear, my shock, my pain, all of it reduced to his name.

I grasped his shirt, pulling on it as I pushed him away from me, pushing him away enough so his face pulled back, and grasped it between my hands. Tears rolled down his leather-skinned cheeks, the hard bones and the roughness of his stubble all at the end of my touch.

His eyes searched mine, and I held his gaze, my senses eating up all that I could get ahold of. “Wolf,” I breathed. “Wolf… Wolf,” I said it over and over again. Each time felt intense with the fear of losing him, the fear of never being able to say it again.

“Wolf,” I whispered, feeling the shaking in my body slowly relax as the relief replaced it. My hands eased against his back, my breath calming and my heart rate slowing until my desperation left only tired mumbles on the side of his neck as my exhaustion left me rolling into his chest.

“Anna,” Wolf breathed, his hand stroking the back of my head and down my back, his chin nuzzling into the side of my face. “No matter what, I love you.”

No matter what?

I wanted to ask him what he meant, but when I tried to open my mouth, it felt too heavy and I couldn’t manage it. I tried to think, but my thoughts were too slow to process anything but the warmth surrounding me.

“Sleep,” Wolf’s soft, tired voice breathed into my ear, and for once, I didn’t argue with him and let myself be swept under into unconsciousness again.

* * *

I sat in the big, plush leather seat in Wolf’s office as I watched the owner of the chair prowl around the small space. I painted my nails, letting the varnish flick from the tip, spraying the thousand-dollar oak desk with red paint. I did it so he couldn’t see it, letting the red build and build until he’d find a nice ruby patch later. It was a petty way to take out my annoyance, but considering I was supposed to be on bedrest for a few more days, I didn’t have much room for violence... For now.

After the night at the hospital, I felt slightly disgruntled and humiliated because of my breakdown into Wolf’s arms, but that was just because of my prideful personality, so I didn’t dwell too much on it. What I did dwell on, however, was Wolf’s sudden distance.

That “no matter what” itched at the back of my mind, and as I tracked his movement around his small office from the corner of my eye, the force I was flicking with slowly increased as he paid me little attention.

I covered my last pinky finger in a second coat of red, splattering one last bit of paint, and put the brush back in the pot, screwing the top shut.

“What is it?” I said, setting the bottle carefully on the top of the desk.

Wolf stopped abruptly, his hands holding open a blue folder from the top shelf of the new bookshelf he’d bought after smashing up his last one. “What?” he said, his bushy eyebrow arched at me.

“What aren’t you telling me?” I replied, perhaps with a bit too much sharpness, as I narrowed my eyes on him. “I’ve known you long enough to see when you’re sulking.”

Wolf wasn’t the type to sulk, not really. And what he was doing I wouldn’t call sulking, more of a quiet, distant brooding, but I knew he wouldn’t like me saying it.

I expected him to snap back at me about the “sulking” thing, but instead, he just said, “I’m not sulking,” and turned back to his folder.

I growled. I wanted to throw something at his thick head, but Wolf had removed anything that could be used as a projectile before he’d put me in his office. Bastard.

“You’re quiet, Wolf,” I growled. “I know this isn’t just about what happened to me. Getting stabbed is more likely to send you on a rampage, not shut you down like this. In fact, I’m somewhat pissed you thought I wouldn’t notice. What the hell is wrong with you?”

“Nothing is wrong with me.” Wolf sighed, not even bothering to look me in the eye.

“You know what?” I hissed, pulling loose one of the bobby pins from my hair, not giving two shits about my nails as I straightened it out and shoved it into the lock of the desk drawer, the lock popping open with a loud click.

Wolf only just had enough time to turn toward me as I aimed his .500 Smith at him.

“Answers,” I spat. “Now.”

“You won’t shoot me.” Wolf sighed, turning his head away from me.

“Wouldn’t I?” I purred, pulling back the hammer until it let out a sweet click. “I won’t kill you, Wolf, but I know where to shoot and not kill.”

His eyes slid over to me with caution. I cocked an eyebrow at him.

My threat understood, he snapped the folder closed and set it back on the shelf, his hand hesitating to leave the spine as it slid down the plastic. “I’m not the one holding back, Anna.”

“What?” I frowned.

Wolf turned back toward me, his hands going over the back of the two other chairs, his eyes meeting mine. “Tell me there are no secrets between us,” he demanded, surprising me.

“A relationship based on pure honesty doesn’t exist,” I returned. “I have my secrets, you have yours.”

“That’s not what I mean, Anna,” Wolf growled, his fingers digging into the chair.

“Then what do you mean, Wolf?” I argued, jamming the gun forward in his direction. He lunged, grabbing the gun and tearing it out of my hand with enough force to bruise my trigger finger.

“Wol—”

“Who are you protecting, Anna?” he snapped, stunning me. His knuckles bulging out of his skin of the hand gripped around the barrel of the loaded revolver. “Who are you the key to?”

The key. Who am I the key to?

“I—”

“Don’t lie to me again, Anna.” Wolf unloaded the gun, the bullets pinging off the wood of the desk, and dropped the weapon down on top of them. He rounded the desk, turning the leather chair to face him, his hands dropping to the armrests, his face leaning in close and sharp as he practically spat the words. “Who are you hiding?”

And it all made sense.

“Oh my God,” I gasped, my heart rate turning into a racing dance in my chest, my limbs growing tingly and cold. “I’m the key?”

Wolf took a step back, his whole body shocked by my reaction, by my surprise.

“You didn’t know?” He frowned, his warm eyes rounding with remorse at his behavior, but I didn’t care. I wasn’t listening.

I launched myself up from the chair, my side burning at the sudden effort. Wolf moved to grab me, no doubt to push me back in my seat, but I shoved his hands aside. I stumbled toward the door, swung it open, and raced the short distance to Wolf’s bedroom.

Heads turned as they watched me kick it open and rush inside, lunging for my purse off the chair and dumping the contents on the bed until my phone appeared in the chaos.

I dropped onto the edge of the bed, my stomach muscles forcing me to double over as I fumbled with the unlocking code and scrolled down my infinitely long contact list. I clicked on “Unnamed.” The number rang and rang.

I became aware of Wolf next to me, his hands gripping onto my shoulders as I breathed through the crippling pain in my stomach. “Answer. Goddammit, answer!” I snapped.

The ringing stopped.

No answer.

“Fuck!” I hissed, throwing the device against the wall, smashing it into pieces. “Shit,” I groaned, my hand cupping my stomach from the pain. I felt dizzy, and my body began to fall forward. I hit something solid, but I couldn’t fight the pain. “Shit, shit,” I hissed, groaning as Wolf shouted something at me. But through all the pain, there was only one thing plaguing my mind.

Ash.

* * *

Kay slapped my hand as I reached toward my stomach. “Don’t touch it,” she hissed, obviously still pissed at me for what I did. “You’re lucky you didn’t tear your stitches,” she continued to scold me, her head shaking as she carefully bandaged the wound.

“Are you done yet?” I grumbled, the cold of the kitchen island counter prickling into my bare back. “I want to get off.”

“Tough shit. You’re not moving from that counter until I’m sure this isn’t going to swell. The cold will do you good,” Kay argued, her hand pushing down on my shoulder, forcing me to lie back. “I’ll turn the heating up in here, but I swear to God, if you move, I will let you bleed out on the floor.”

“And people think I’m the mean one,” I scoffed, earning myself a softened scowl from Kay’s direction. She brushed a hand through my hair, shaking her head at me with a sigh.

She lifted a pillow from the floor and helped scoot it underneath my head before she placed a soft kiss on my cheek and went to the door. “Prepare yourself.”

She opened the door and in barreled the huge Russian man, Jax, Hunter, and Lamb on his heels as they all came into the room.

“Nice.” Jax winked at me as he took in my shirtless form. Luckily, I was wearing a nice lacy bra that was one of my more conservative pieces of underwear. Just because Wolf and I were on the no-sexual-activity-of-any-sort ban didn’t mean I couldn’t look good. Then again, I looked good in anything, stab wound or not.

Wolf’s eyes were so fixated on me that he mustn’t have registered the comment. Hunter slapped Jax on the back of his head in Wolf’s place.

Wolf’s eyes drifted down to my bandaged stomach, a frown deepening on his face.

“Oh please, don’t look like I stabbed your puppy.” I groaned, reading the guilt deepening in the lines. “Your face is frowny enough without feeling guilty for this. It isn’t your fault.”

He scowled at me, displeased I called him out on his martyred emotions.

“Well, it’s not,” I huffed. “Not that it’s really my fault, either.”

I heard Kay scoff at the doorway, sending me one last glare, reminding me of her threat before she stepped out and shut the door behind her.

I looked at the four brothers, their eyes still holding their own reservations about my wound. I saw Jax make a pointed attempt not to even glance any lower than my boobs. Not sure if I was thankful for that or not.

“Who is it?” Lamb interrupted my thoughts. He’d checked out the wound when he’d first come in, but otherwise didn’t look too perturbed. In fact, I could see his cold, calculating self swimming just below the surface.

I sighed, sinking my head back into the pillow, pretending to look deep into the steel ceiling. “Ash.” The name felt weird coming off my tongue, and it reminded me of how long it had been since I last said it.

“Ash?” Jax repeated, his brow arching.

“Ash was—is my best friend,” I divulged, nostalgia curdling in my chest. “We moved to the US together four years ago. Or rather, we ran away...” My mind flashed with memories. “Monster...,” they whispered over and over, but I shoved them back down where they belonged and carried on. “We thought we covered it up and got away, but apparently not.” I felt my wound twitch, reminding me of why I ended up on the cold countertop.

“What did Ash do?” Jax asked, catching my gaze.

“I…” I looked across each of their faces and felt my throat tighten up. I shook off the bad memories of that night, but other memories came forth, reminding me of why I was so impatient. “Look, I’ll tell you everything, but first we need to find Ash. If they did this,”—I gestured down to my stomach—“then it won’t be long until they locate her.”

Lamb nodded, his brain cataloging the information. The others looked like they wanted to press me for more information, but they didn’t, and I was glad for it. No matter what went down, this story wasn’t mine alone, and it didn’t feel right to tell it. Not when even I didn’t know everything.

“Where is she?” Hunter stepped up, coming closer to the table.

“I can’t tell you.”

“Anna,” Wolf growled.

“It’s not that I won’t tell you,” I quickly added, sensing his irritation at an obvious misinterpretation. “When I say I can’t, Wolf, it means that I can’t.” His frown only deepened, forcing my own annoyed growl out of my lips. “I don’t know where Ash is.”

Wolf’s facial expression relaxed, but only slightly. He remained as intense as he was the second he had entered the room. He had one hand wrapped around mine, the muscles in his fist clenching and relaxing around my small fingers.

“When was the last time you saw her?” Lamb asked.

“Ash isn’t the easiest person to keep in touch with,” I scoffed, considering how much of an understatement it was. “Last time I heard anything about her whereabouts was when Mallory saw her at the airport.”

“What?” Hunter started. “The British chick that spoke to Mallory in the airport was her?”

“When Mallory told me what they said, I figured it was her. Ash has always considered herself an advice Guru, but really, she’s just a nosy bitch. I don’t think she knew Mallory was connected to me, but with Ash, you can never know for sure.” Not that I would ever tell her that even I couldn’t completely read her to her face; she’d love to think she was shrouded in mystery.

“So, how are we supposed to find her?” Jax asked, looking at me as if I might whip out an “Ash compass.”

“You don’t,” I said, causing him to frown.

“But I thought you said that the other guys were close to finding her?” Jax retorted.

“No, I said it won’t be long until they do,” I corrected him, acutely aware of the confusion growing on the rest of the brothers’ faces. Even Lamb narrowed his eyes on me as he awaited my explanation. “You don’t find Ash. No one can.”

“What do you mean?” Jax grumbled, getting that annoyed pout on his face, reaching the end of his patience.

“You would have thought a group with Russian killing machines like the Black Jacks would know where to stab someone to kill them.” I pointed at my wound again. “But I’m not dead.”

Jax scoffed. “Pretty sure that’s ’cause you have a contract with the devil.”

“Funny,” I huffed, shaking my head at him before looking at the adult brothers. “They missed my organs. On purpose, at that.”

“Why?” Hunter asked this time, but it wasn’t me who answered him.

“To lure out Ash,” Lamb answered, the cogs in his mind showing in his eyes as they put the pieces together. “If they can’t find her, the only other way is to get her to come to them.”

“Well, to come to me, actually. There’s nothing like getting stabbed to draw her out into the open, and with no way of communicating with her from my end, I can’t tell her not to come.” I sighed. “The Black Jacks are going to be watching us like hawks, ready to grab her the second she surfaces.”

Wolf tightened his grip on my hand, causing me to look at him. I realized he’d been studying my face, and his amber eyes narrowed on it, seriousness overtaking his brooding mask for once. “What do you want to do?”

What did I want to do?

Maybe someone else might not have thought Wolf asking me that was a big deal, but for a control freak like him, I knew it meant a lot more than he might let on.

“We need to get to her first,” I said, my mind reeling. “And I know exactly how to do it.”

“I don’t think I’m going to like this,” Wolf grumbled.

He was probably right.