I stop walking to drink some more water from one of the flasks we found in another part of the ruins. This place has a lot of useful items buried in the debris. We've found basically everything we need, just from digging through the rubble.

Well.

Almost everything.

Ryuth looks back at me, his eyes taking in my face, scanning my body. He seems to be doing that more and more. He looks worried. I understand why.

I try to smile back, but it's becoming a strain.

He doesn't look reassured as he looks away again, continuing to walk through the ruins.

When he's not watching anymore, I lift my hand up, palm down. It shakes even though I'm trying to hold it steady. The tremors are uncontrollable. Not a good sign, to say the least.

I shove the flask back into the bag that I've taken to carrying around with me. We found it not that far from the lochabers. We needed at least one more bag to carry other things, one that we don't put meat in. Because, gross.

I swallow, feeling the dry scratchiness of my throat. It clicks with the movement, it's so parched, even though I just had water. I pull my shirt away from my skin where it wants to stick. It's soaked in sweat, just like it hass been for the last three days. I can't drink fast enough to keep up with how much water I'm losing. Even here in the oasis, the least dry place I’ve been on Tajss, I'm fighting dehydration. I know it's no use.

The heat on Tajss isn't something the human body is built to thrive in. It's starting to show more and more. I have a headache for the second day in a row. And it's grown from a dull throb that I can mostly push aside to a sharper pain, something I can't ignore. I swallow as my stomach rolls with another wave of nausea. Another gift of this climate.

Joy.

I take a deep breath and hold it.

One.

Two.

Three.

Four.

By five, it recedes again. Though it won't be for long unless something changes. The bouts of nausea are getting more frequent too.

"Ryuth," I call out. He looks back at me immediately, though whether it's because I said his name or just because of the sound of my voice, I can't really say. "I think I'm really going to need some epis soon."

I feel terrible saying it. Like I'm an addict who needs her fix. Which is exactly what I am when it comes down to it.

Ryuth nods before turning away and continuing to walk. Or I think he does anyway.

I don't know if he understands what I'm saying, but talking to him is comforting nonetheless. And I've found that he doesn't seem to mind the talking unless he thinks there's something dangerous nearby. Like when the tremors occur.

So I keep going. Anything to keep my mind off my headache, the tremors, the nausea. There's no medication I can take to ease any of it.

"I know the epis is supposed change us on a cellular level. Change our DNA so we're able to adapt to this place, to this climate. I'd be dead if I hadn't taken it. But man," I sigh as I force my body to climb over a particularly large piece of rock. Ryuth's hand takes a firm grip on my forearm and I look up to see his grim face. He pulls me up and over the rest of the way. "Thank you." He turns and keeps walking in front of me, his hyper-vigilant gaze continuing to scan the area. "Anyway. I know the epis is the reason why I'm still alive right now. And I'm grateful for that, really. But I don't know if I would have taken it if I knew the withdrawal would be this bad." I stop in my tracks as a shiver racks my body, my teeth clacking together in my head.

How can I be sweating and shivering at the same time? I don't know, but it's happening. And it isn't pleasant. Not at all. After it finally passes, I take a deep breath, rolling my shoulders.

Then I continue walking after Ryuth as he leads us deeper and deeper into the compound. I don't know where he's leading towards. By the way he’s scanning the ground and the ruined walls, it’s clear he’s searching for something, but I don't know what it is. I sigh, wishing I could lie down for a bit.

I'm worried I won't be able to get up again if I do. And I'm not quite ready to throw in the towel.

So I grit my teeth and start talking again. Anything to get my mind off of exactly how bad I'm feeling.

"How long will it take for our DNA to change to what it needs to be? How long will we have to keep taking the stuff so often, how long before we can just take a little once in a while like you do? And what is the final result going to be when our DNA does change? I mean, I know the need for the epis will taper off to a maintenance dose, but what will we be maintaining? Are we going to turn red? Grow scales like you?" I shake my head. "Or will each person change a little differently? Are we going to become the X-Men?" I stop to ponder that. Hmm. "Actually, if I can fly after all is said and done, I won't be complaining." I fish my flask out of my bag and take another gulp of water. I'm just going to keep it in my hand now. I feel like I should have the damn thing pressed to my lips constantly. "I feel terrible," I mutter. "And all I really know is that I feel so much better when I'm on it. I never thought I'd become an addict. Even if it is something that saved my life. That I need to survive."

It's a sobering thought.

Ryuth pauses for a bit in front of me. He does that to make sure I'm keeping up with him. He keeps an eye out for me during the day. Keeps me safe at night. Finds food and water for us to survive on.

He's not bad company, really. At least he listens. Or gives the appearance of listening.

More and more, I can see the intelligence awakening behind his eyes. I know it's there. If nothing else, at least this escape seems to be bringing him back to himself. He hasn't had a fit of rage since we left. He's been calmer than I've been, actually.

Not that that's saying that much, I guess. The epis withdrawal and the situation aren't bringing out the best in me if I'm honest.

But Ryuth is doing great.

Maybe the imprisonment was cementing his regression and that was why he wasn't making progress? Maybe with his triggers removed for an extended period of time, he's getting a chance to heal? Whatever the reason, I'm glad for it.

I look around as we reach a building that is damaged more than most of the rest.

Ryuth paces back to me, his eyes concerned as he takes my hand in his and pulls me along behind him, helping me duck under fallen beams and climb over more rubble. He's attentive and careful. Not a beast, like the others kept making him out to be. He doesn't let go of my hand now as we continue to go deeper. And he's definitely searching for something, his eyes sharp as he takes in every nook and cranny around us.

It's all I can do to just stay on my feet at this point. His will is the only thing keeping us moving.

The ground starts to tremble under my feet.

For a moment I'm not sure if it's my body again or the ground.

That's . . . alarming.

It's only clear that it's the ground when Ryuth brings us to a stop and covers my mouth with his hand, his body tense against mine as the tremor builds and then passes.

They're happening more and more the deeper we go into this place, farther away from the courtyard and back towards the front, where we first started. They're not usually any worse. But they're definitely happening more often.

Dust showers down on us in a dark cloud from the already-ruined roof as the tremor comes to a stop. We wait another few heartbeats. And then Ryuth is pulling us along again.

I still don't know exactly why he covers my mouth and stops us, but I can only assume it's to minimize sound. There's some kind of danger he must associate with the tremors. I still don't know if he's right, and I still haven't seen anything. But I figure erring on the side of caution can’t hurt. He seems to know what he's doing about everything else out here.

"Why are there so many earthquakes here?" I ask when it's clear I don't have to be quiet anymore. "I mean, it's not normal, right? And why do we have to be quiet when they happen? What are you afraid of?"

No response, as usual. But I keep talking to fill the silence as we walk. Though maybe climb, skirt, and duck are more appropriate for how we're moving forward.

The tremors happen a couple more times. Each time, Ryuth behaves the same. Forcing me to stop, covering my face with his hand. Scanning the area around us.

We would make much faster time if we didn't have to completely stop each time.

Finally, we reach a hall that isn't like the rest. The roof has caved in completely, leaving it open to the red of the sky above. Open to the searing sunlight, the air, the sand. The floor is covered in dirt, shards of white and red stone, glass, and other debris. Some of it is clearly from inside, but the rest has to have found its way in after the roof collapsed.

But that isn't what makes the large space unique, different from the rest of this compound. What makes it singular is the plants.

They're growing wild in the hall, taking over every inch of space. Tall, thin-stemmed plants, short bush-like ones. Some with giant flowers so heavy they wilt on the stalks, others only made of large, shiny leaves. They crawl up the walls, reaching for the opening at the top of the building where the light is. They cover the floor, vying for space.

It even smells different here, the strong green smell refreshing. But there's something almost rotten underneath.

It puts me on edge.

And Ryuth seems to feel the same. Ryuth is even more careful now as he slowly picks his way through the plants, his hand locked tightly on mine.

I understand why.

Even if that thread of oddness in the scent didn't hit us, I know most of the plants on Tajss will kill you if they can. And I definitely know better than to let down my guard around them. The prettier something is here, the more likely it is to kill you.

Charming, right?

I keep an eye out as I follow Ryuth's lead. He ducks under leaves, weaves through vines, trying not to touch anything. Or at least trying to minimize touching anything. It's kind of difficult with everything packed together so densely.

I don't know why we're going deeper into the plants, but I'm starting to trust Ryuth enough that I follow along without resisting. Well, that and I really don't have the energy to argue. I feel like I'm dying anyway. Why not foray into a forest of potentially deadly plants?

He hasn't led me astray so far. And even if he isn't fully back to himself, he's shown he's a better survivor than I am, even with my memories and higher thought processes fully intact. How embarrassing.

Finally, when we're roughly in the middle of the hall, he stops. I turn my attention away from the leaves and trunks around us and back to him, wondering what made him stop. His head is tilted back as he stares up towards the ceiling.

"What is it?" I ask, my voice hoarse. Probably from all the talking coupled with the dehydration. I can feel my lips cracking a little, they're so dry and chapped.

Wonderful.

Focus. I need to focus. My thoughts want to drift away more and more.

Frowning, I follow the direction of his gaze.

Two massive beams have fallen over, most likely from all the earthquakes. It looks like they were situated on opposite sides of the room and managed to fall into each other, keeping both from actually hitting the ground. They form an oddly symmetrical upside down v shape.

I don't know what color they were originally because they're green now from the soft-looking moss dripping off them and the small, ivy-like vines wrapped around parts of their length.

But Ryuth isn't focused on their lengths. He's focused on the center of them, where they brace each other, meeting in that high point. There, where they rest against each other, there's another plant. A dark ruby-colored pant. It's such a different shade from the rest I'm surprised I didn't see it right away.

It tells me exactly how out of it I am. Especially since, where the sunlight hits it, the leaves shimmer against the depth of the base color. It's gorgeous and eye-catching.

But why is Ryuth focused on it? The beauty of it can't be the only reason.

I turn to look at him. He looks away from the plant to meet my stare. And then looks back up at the plant.

His eyes watch it intensely for another moment before they start drifting over the room. Over the other plants, the walls, the roof above. Or lack thereof, really. After making a thorough circuit of the room, he finally turns to me.

"What is it?" I ask. "What are we doing here?"

Letting go of my hand, he makes a pushing down gesture with both of his, palm side down. Then he stomps on the ground and makes the hand gesture again. Seeing he has my attention, he then takes a step back, this time making a pushing gesture with his palms facing me.

"Stay here?" I ask, pointing to myself and then the ground. He nods his head, pointing at the ground like I just did. I nod back, elated we're getting through to each other more and more. At least we have some kind of communication going now.

"Okay. I'll stay here."

He takes another step, but he's still watching me. Waiting to see if I'll move? When he looks like he's sure I'm not going to follow, he finally turns and closes the distance between him and the beam to the left.

Gripping it with his hands and bracing his feet on it, he starts climbing.

I automatically take a step forward but then stop myself. What is he doing? Climbing that thing can't be safe! That beam has basically been exposed to the elements for decades, most likely. I sincerely doubt it's still structurally sound, especially not with the moisture that moss and those vines would need to live on it.

I measure with my eyes the distance from the ground to the top of the beam near the high ceiling—or where the ceiling used to be—and feel my mouth go dry.

It's high.

Really high.

And I don't think Ryuth intends to stop until he's at the very top.