I found my father in his office sitting at a table, head hanging forward and his eyes scanning a chart.

“Am I interrupting?” I asked softly, as my knuckles rapped on the door.

He glanced up from the clipboard in his hand, a flop of hair falling over his forehead. “Muffin, I was just looking over your report the commander sent up for my review.”

Disappointment fell in my stomach like rocks. For one day, I just wanted to be his daughter, not another prospect for his program. He already had one daughter who was a trained guard, a weapon. Why did he need another? “Wonderful,” I said in a monotone. “What negative remarks did he leave me this time? Does he detail each time I got the crap kicked out of me?”

“Now Charlotte, Jaxson is just doing his job, as everyone here is.” Eyes much like mine used to be, roamed my face. “You know we have healers who can make you good as new,” he said without missing a beat. Bruises colored my cheeks and all he had to say was “get a healer.”

“The pain reminds me not to take life for granted,” I replied, plopping down in a chair on the opposite side of the desk from him.

“Why not benefit from the resources we have been given?”

I scoffed. “How many of these ‘resources’ are here of their own free will?”

He set down the clipboard on the table, giving me his serious expression. “Not this again. You still think we’re holding all of these people against their will?”

I fiddled with the corner of the desk, picking at a sliver of wood that was coming off. “I don’t know. Nothing makes sense.”

“Give it time. You’ll come to understand that the Institute isn’t the enemy. There are things out there we need to protect ourselves from.”

Maybe he was right. Then again, maybe Dash was right. Either way, I wasn’t here to discuss that. “I’ve been having a hard time adjusting.”

“Yes, I remember what it was like when I woke. I was one of the first, you know.”

I did, but listening to him reminisce about how difficult and savage it had been prior to the order of the Institute was not on my agenda. “I want to ask you a favor. I think it would help me settle.”

He folded his hands on the desk and leaned back in his chair. “What is it, Muffin?”

I cringed. The childhood nickname no longer gave me the warm fuzzies of being safe and loved.

“You don’t have to be nervous. If you need something, I am sure we can find a solution,” he reasoned, reminding me for a moment of the father I grew up with. Reasonable and reliable—two words that had come to mind when thinking about my dad.

I took a deep breath and then decided the only way to get through what was going to be an awkward request was to blurt it out. So I did. “I want you to stop hunting Dash.”

Dead air.

The man didn’t even blink. It was inhuman the way he just stared at me as if someone had frozen time. “Why would we do that?” he finally managed to say.

“Because I’ve done everything you’ve asked of me since I got here. More or less. I’ve never complained, and I haven’t asked for anything … except this,” I added.

The frown on his face deepened. “I can see this is important to you. May I ask why?”

“Why I would care about someone like Dash?” He hadn’t come right out and said it, but I knew where his thoughts had gone. I folded my arms across my chest. “He saved my life, or have you forgotten? Isn’t that enough to reprieve him of his previous crimes? Give him a second chance?”

“That’s not how things work here.”

“But you have the power to call off the hunt for him.”

He kept his expression blank, but the tick just above his eye signaled his displeasure. “It isn’t a hunt. The Night’s Guard has been ordered not to kill him. There is no need to worry about Dash’s safety.”

But I did. And until I knew Dash didn’t have a target on his back, I couldn’t relax. “If you don’t do this, I will leave the Institute.” Time to play hardball.

Stern lines creased the corners of his lips. “I can’t let that happen.”

I shot forward in my seat. “Why? Because you’ll imprison me again? Will you lock me in that god-awful pink room forever?”

“I can’t allow you to go out there on your own. I forbid it, especially to go after some foolish boy. This isn’t high school.”

I’m sorry, what? Forbid? What was I … five? “Excuse me? I am almost eighteen. Technically, I’m a hundred and seventeen. You no longer get to tell me what I can or can’t do.”

Dr. Winston heaved, giving me a withering look. “Charlotte, he is dangerous. Very dangerous. Dash is not the kind of person you should concern yourself with. He is a murderer.”

I begged to differ. I hadn’t expected this conversation to go well, but it had taken a turn down shitville. It was probably a good idea not to mention that I was kind of in love with him.

Not that it mattered though. Dash had made it clear that he wasn’t free to reciprocate my feelings. Even knowing that, my heart ached to see him. Just once. I needed to know that he was alive.

“I killed someone. Are you going to condemn me to the dungeons?” I challenged.

“Don’t be ridiculous. You’re my daughter.”

“Oh, so it is okay for your daughter to kill someone in self-defense, but anyone else in the same situation is a murderer? How is that fair?” I slapped my hands on his desk. “You judge him without knowing the facts. He can’t help the abilities he was given any more than I can.”

“The fact is, young lady, I am your father. And furthermore, I am the director of the Institute. My word is law.” He closed his eyes briefly, taking a deep breath. I could see in his face that I was draining his patience. “The world might be a foreign place, but there are some things that have not changed. Do you think there are good and evil people in the Heights?”

I gnawed on my lower lip before I answered, knowing this was a trick question. “Yes.”

“Do you know what caused the world to go into a state of emergency over a hundred years ago?” he asked.

“The mist.”

“The mist didn’t just suddenly appear. Humans created weapons of mass destruction—nuclear weapons.”

“So you’re saying it was a terrorist attack?”

“I’m saying it was evil. The government had safeguards in place, like the holding houses all across the States in case of an attack on our country. I’d been part of a team that had been working on a medical breakthrough, a cryogenics drug that would put the body in a prolonged state of sleep, preserving a person’s life, cells, organs, and body. They wouldn’t age, not until the drug completed its cycle and the person woke up. It was supposed to be enough time to let Earth stabilize.”

I gasped. “You created Ceraspan?”

He nodded. “Yes, but it was only in the testing stages at the time of the mist. We were positive with a few more years we’d have perfected the serum, but we never had the chance. The nuclear attack releasing the mist changed everything, and our drug is why only a small section of the world had been saved. As far as we know, there is no other life beyond the Heights.”

This was a lot to take in. I sank back into my chair, uncertain how I felt about this development.

“The toxic mist hadn’t been a foreign enemy. It was a citizen of our own country, a madman who activated a weapon that destroyed the world and almost wiped out mankind,” he said.

Epic facepalm.

“Why would someone do that?” I asked.

“Evil comes in all shapes and forms. There are reasons the Institute is so selective, allowing only those with abilities to serve on the Night’s Guard. Our tests have a purpose. It is up to us to weed out the evil, so that Earth as we know it can endure. Human life is in a fragile state. Killing each other is not the answer, but we must do what we can to preserve the land, preserve our future, and preserve the human race,” he justified. “Have you asked yourself why he didn’t bother to search for you? Why he ran off into the dark without so much as a goodbye? Dash Darhk cares for no one but himself. It would be wise if you remembered that.”

I had no misconceptions about Dash’s past, but he wasn’t as terrible as his reputation made him sound. That I knew for a fact. I wanted to tell my father he didn’t know Dash as well as I did, but in reality, he had been at the Institute longer than with me. Maybe I wasn’t the one who was being deceived. “I should probably get back to my room. It has been a long day.” I put my hands on the chair, ready to leave.

“Charlotte, another minute if you don’t mind and then you can go.”

I relaxed back into the chair and waited to see what else he had to say.

He placed both his hands on the desk. “I understand there has been a development in your abilities.”

I lifted a brow. “There has?”

“Yes. It seems your eyes taken on a solid color when you use your gift. I find that interesting. Do you think it is interesting?” He asked the question in a way that made it seem as if I’d been withholding this information from him.

Truth be told, I had been, but that was beside the point. I shrugged. “Considering the things I’ve seen since I woke up, nothing seems abnormal anymore.”

His finger ran over the chart on his desk. “You’re able to summon and command lightning.”

“Seems so.” I couldn’t help the attitude.

His hand rested under his clean-shaven chin. “What about other abilities?”

“What other abilities?” I would play the dumb card for as long as possible.

“Have you noticed anything that might suggest you have more than one? Scientifically, if one ability changes your irises, then the other colors could indicate they stand for other skills.”

“Great. Now I’m a science experiment. My lifelong dream.”

“That is not true, but if you do have four abilities, it would make you special. We’ve never seen a human with that kind of power.” Excitement laced with his voice. He was very interested in what I wasn’t admitting.

My cheeks flamed. “I’m not sure I could handle that kind of power.”

A glass of water sat at the edge of his desk. He picked it up and glanced at me over the rim. “You’d be surprised what one could handle given the right motivation, like protecting those we love.”

That I could agree with. I had come here under the delusion of love for my family, only to find that they were strangers to me. And yet, I found that I would still do everything in my power to keep them safe, even exposing the full extent of my abilities. That fierce loyalty also extended to Dash, whether my father liked it or not. I wouldn’t abandon him.

* * *

Walking down the long hallway of the seventh floor, I meandered to my room. Defeated and feeling isolated, I stared out the massive floor-to-ceiling windows, which gave me an uninterrupted view of the courtyard.

I got a far-off look in my eyes, unable to stop my thoughts from drifting to Dash. I had thought I could reason with my father by letting him know how important it was to me to let Dash live his life, to find his family without being hunted. Was it too much for him to grant me this one small favor?

Apparently so.

Disappointment couldn’t come close to what I currently felt. I was numb inside.

Something happened today, a turning point.

Since I’d woken up, my life had been on hiatus, always waiting for the next disaster. My only hope had been family, and my heart should be filled with joy now, not slowly cracking. Today, I wasn’t my father’s little muffin anymore. I held no sway over him, and this dream I’d been holding onto of being reunited with my family since I woke was just that: a dream.

I knew when Dash and I had parted that I would miss him, but it was so much more than that. There was no rationalizing it. With barely any effort, I could conjure his face from memory. His broad cheekbones, his lips that were almost always laughing at me, and those eyes—those magnetic eyes that would sparkle like starlight or turn as hard as stone.

I had come to my room, number 710, and pushed the door open. A single tear dripped down my cheek, and the only thing I wanted was to cry myself to sleep. I’d expected to find an empty room. That wasn’t the case.

Star sat on my bed, her hands neatly folded in her lap and her beautiful blonde hair swept over one shoulder. A tray of food sat untouched on my little table.

Must be dinnertime.

I had no appetite. In fact, the smell of food made my stomach roll. I laid my head against the wooden doorframe.

Star’s head turned in my direction. She took a look at my tear-streaked face and sympathy shined in her eyes. “I heard you had a rough day.”

I blinked away the tears. “Every day is rough.”

“You want to talk about it?”

I shuffled my feet across the floor and plunked down on the bed. Surprisingly, I did want to talk to someone. Star had become my only friend here. It had been a challenge getting her to open up to me, but over the last week, she had blossomed. “I almost killed Tyger today.”

Her lips tipped up. “I heard. He is such a shiweeb.”

I scrunched my nose, giving her an odd look. “What is a shiweeb?”

She shrugged. “I like to make up words. There’s not much to do. I get bored, so I play with words, a little creative swearing. Before the mist, I grew up in a house where cussing was taboo.”

I couldn’t imagine. Swear words made up half my vocabulary. It was bad, but in situations where my life was being threatened, a good asshat or shitface sufficed nicely. “Shiweeb,” I said again, testing it out. “I like it.” I grinned.

“What were you thinking about?” she asked. “You looked so sad when you came in.”

Being in Dash’s arms, kissing him, touching him—stuff I shouldn’t be thinking about. He had a girlfriend, which put a huge damper on us being together. Then of course, there was the little tidbit of my father loathing him. The odds were stacked against us, and yet I couldn’t let go of the little seed of hope that someday things might be different and there would be nothing standing in our way. It might have been only a girl’s fantasy, but it gave me something to hold onto—keep me sane in a tower of insanity.

I blinked, smearing the nearly dry tears with the back of my hand. “Nothing.” I refused to show weakness, even to my only friend, and as sweet as Star was, I was afraid to open up about my feelings for the Slayer. I didn’t know who I could trust.

Except Dash.

And he wasn’t here.

As much as I wished he could be beside me—needed him to be—this was the last place I wanted him. The very last.

I only had a taste of what the Institute could do. Imagining what Dash had been through made a strand of fear coil around my lungs, rendering me breathless. God only knew what else they had in store for me. I’d passed one test, but my dad was already suspicious of my eyes. This place was as unpredictable as the Heights, and I intuitively knew that my parents were hiding something from me. They weren’t allowing me to see the whole picture.

Heart aching, I turned my attention back to Star, forcing my mind to other things—information that I could stow away for the chance to escape, because I was beginning to think I no longer wanted to stay within these white walls. Star was my only source of intel about the Institute.

“If you don’t want to talk about it, I understand. We can talk about something else … like Ryker?”

My eyes narrowed. “What about him?” And why had her voice taken on this teasing quality?

She folded her legs underneath her on the bed, the smile on her face beaming. “I heard Ryker has taken you under his wing.”

“Is that a bad thing?”

“He likes you.”

“Well, that’s a first. Everyone else wants to fry me, freeze me, hit me, drown me—basically everything short of killing me and anything else they can think of that would cause me physical harm. If Dash was here—” I stopped myself, my chin jutting up in the air. He wasn’t here. He wasn’t going to save me this time. And I needed to get used to looking out for my own sore butt.

“The Slayer?” Star lifted her brows. “You have feelings for him? He is the one you were crying over.”

“Only the kind that make me want to strangle him.”

Star smiled. “Or kiss him.”

I gave her the stink-eye. It was time I stopped worrying so much about Dash and started thinking about how I could break out from under the Institute’s warped thumb. I refused to be a weapon they controlled to do their stupid bidding. The only people I wanted to hurt were those who tried to harm me.

And Dash.

He had left me, not giving me the chance to escape with him. I’d been so consumed with his safety that I hadn’t let myself think about the alternatives. Would I have left with him? Before I had the answers I’d been looking for? I wasn’t positive, but it didn’t stop a ripple of betrayal from pooling up. Anger pushed aside my sadness. Damn my father for putting the seed of treachery in my head.

I scowled. “Right now, I don’t want to kiss anyone.”

“Not even Ryker? I’m pretty sure he would lock lips with you in a heartbeat if he didn’t think you’d electrocute him.”

My lips twitched. “And shock him I would. I’m not interested in complicating my life anymore. I’ve sworn off boys indefinitely.”

Star let out a wistful sigh. “Not me. I think it would be wonderful to have someone to cuddle up to.”

She was lonely. I could see it in her soft brown eyes. “You haven’t found your family?”

Her curls bounced as she shook her head. “I didn’t have much of a family to begin with. Just my grandma.”

“Do you ever think about leaving, searching for her on your own?”

I hadn’t asked the question to make her uncomfortable, but her fingers fidgeted with the fabric on the bed. “It has crossed my mind, but I wouldn’t be able to survive out there. I don’t have any abilities. I’d be lost.”

It was enough that she had thought about leaving here, for it made me feel as if I could trust Star. “I think about escaping,” I admitted. “I don’t know if I can stay here.”

She grabbed my hand, her skin cold and clammy. “Don’t say that. Promise you won’t tell anyone. I don’t want to get in trouble.”

Genuine fear rang in her voice, and I gave her fingers a squeeze. “I swear, Star. I won’t.” But seeing that instant leap of distress, I wanted to know why me possibly being a blabbermouth caused her such fright. “Has anyone threatened you?”

“No, why would you think that?” Her words were rushed, and her eyes darted over the room. I could spot a lie a mile away.

“You don’t have to be afraid,” I whispered. “I won’t let anyone hurt you. Ever. I swear it.”

“As noble as that is, you can’t be everywhere at once. Besides, I’m fine.”

Fine, my left butt cheek. She was lying. What isn’t she telling me? But I knew if I pushed her while she was jumpy, Star would only clam up. “Okay, if you insist, but you can trust me, Star. I’m your friend.”

A wistful gleam moved into her eyes. “We’re friends?”

I nodded. “You’re kind of my only friend.”

She beamed, the grin on her lips growing.

* * *

That night I sincerely thought about leaving the Institute, just walking out the front door and never looking back.

But where would I go?

How would I survive?

This time, I would be entirely on my own. No Dash to keep away the things that went bump in the middle of the night. No Dash to catch my dinner and cook it. No Dash to navigate me through the Heights.

There was a theme: no Dash.

And I was too scared to take the leap alone.

I rubbed the bridge of my nose to relieve the sinus pressure building in my head. I needed rest, and for once, I wasn’t dreading slumber.

Sleep went from being something I’d been afraid of to a drug I craved. For in the land of dreams, I could sometimes see the one person I missed the most, the only one who seemed to understand me.

To my frustration, the visions had a mind of their own, coming and going as they pleased. And never when I sought them. If there were an ability I hadn’t been able to understand, it was the visions—the pink color.

Tonight, I got lucky, and I wasn’t going to question the gift. The visions of Dash made me feel complete. Pretty messed up, considering most of the time he was in trouble, being hunted by the Institute and its guards, yet there was something almost normal about the constant danger. I’d become accustomed to it since it was all I’d known since I’d woken up, but it didn’t stop me from wanting to save him for a change.

I had to find a way to get him off the Institute’s radar.