Chapter Five

Maxim took the papers that he had found in the office and laid them out so that Avery could look at them with him. Until then he hadn’t thought that the human pilot would have anything of interest or value to add to his investigation and understanding of the papers. He hadn’t been involved in the conflict until they found him in the panic room within the ship and didn’t have all of the details that the rest of them did. Now, though, he realized that it was that very characteristic that made Avery valuable. He didn’t have the closely focused perspective that those from Uoria had about the situation. While they were focused on everything that Ryan had done and the painful impact that his actions had had on them then and that he continued to have on them with every passing moment, Avery only knew the facts about the crew and Penthos that he had learned throughout his life, and the information that they had told him. This took the emotion out of it for him so that he was better able to see the details and intricacies that they overlooked. If it hadn’t been for him, Maxim may never have heard the name Martin Roe, and while he still didn’t know the significance of that name, he knew that he would and that it meant something.

As they crouched by the papers, Maxim noticed Avery rubbing around one of his fingers as if there was something that was missing from it. Avery noticed that Maxim was watching him and let his fingers fall away from his other hand.

“Sorry,” he said. “I’m used to having a wedding band there.”

Maxim wasn’t sure what to say. He didn’t understand the significance of the statement. While the Mikana used many of the same terms as the humans to describe their relationships, they didn’t have wedding bands. He didn’t know what it would mean that Avery usually had one but didn’t now.

“Did you lose it?” Maxim asked, unsure of what else he was supposed to say.

Avery shook his head.

“Not exactly. My wife and I got divorced. It was a couple of years ago, so I should be used to it by now, but I always used to spin my ring around when I was thinking hard about something. I guess it was just habit, because I still do it. “

“Divorced?” Maxim asked.

Avery looked at him quizzically.

“Your kind doesn’t have divorce, I’m guessing?” he asked.

Maxim shook his head.

“I haven’t heard the term.”

“It means that we ended our marriage,” Avery said, a hint of regret in his voice.

“We can do that,” Maxim said. “It doesn’t happen very often, admittedly.”

Avery nodded, a distant look in his eyes.

“That must be nice,” he said. “I never thought that I was going to be one of those people who get divorced. I always thought that there must be something wrong with them or that they weren’t good at being in a relationship. Maybe they were selfish and self-centered and didn’t know how to take care of a marriage, or maybe Sarah and I were just so much more in love than any of them ever were so there was no way that we were going to just stop loving each other and get divorced.” He let out a laugh that sounded as though he were completely disbelieving of his own misled thoughts as much as he was trying to connect with Maxim through sharing the situation. “Of course, then I did become one of those people. And you know what I figured out?”

“What?” Maxim asked.

“That those people aren’t any different than any other people. These are the same people who love their spouses as much as I loved Sarah when we got married, and think that they are going to be better at being married, and will nurture their marriages, and will love each other so much that there will be nothing that will take them apart. There is no difference between people who get divorced and people who don’t. The ones who don’t just happen to have found a relationship that will work while those who get divorced didn’t.”

“I guess it’s a good thing that you learned that,” Maxim said.

Avery nodded with long sigh.

“It’s the one good thing that came out of it,” he said with another laugh. “I have to admit, though, there are a lot of times when I really miss being married. It’s not so much that I miss her. Everything that happened was enough to make it so that I never wanted to be with her again. But we’ve come to a point where we are fairly comfortable with each other. It’s been long enough that we aren’t really angry with each other anymore and can even have a conversation that is almost pleasant. That’s really nice.”

“But you want somebody at home with you,” Maxim said.

Avery nodded and reached forward to shuffle through the papers on the floor between them as if he were starting to feel uncomfortable with the conversation.

“I’m away a lot because of my job, of course. There are months at a time when I’m only on Earth long enough to go home, take a shower, and repack my bags, but then once I’m done with those tours, I have a month or two when I’m only working for a few days for short trips, or even completely off. It would be nice not to have to go home to a totally empty house. I have some friends and all, but that doesn’t replace a wife. I guess I can’t really expect many women to be interested in a husband that misses a good chunk of the year while he’s piloting a leisure ship.”

“You never know who you might meet,” Maxim said.

His mind immediately went to Ivy and his longing for her became more intense. He had never expected her. Before the Denynso arrived at the Mikana kingdom and brought the men back to the human settlement, he never thought about having a partner. He was dedicated to training to be in the army and to watching over his mother to make sure that she was coping without his father. While other men his age were starting to find their wives and thinking about the families that they were going to build with them, it wasn’t something that was a priority to him. Then he saw her and everything changed. In that first moment that he saw Ivy, a feeling came over him that was totally different than anything that he had ever experienced. It wasn’t just that he found her beautiful or that he was intrigued by this young human woman who had just recently arrived from Earth to assist with scientific research on Uoria. Instead, he felt a draw to her that was both undeniable and indescribable. It was as if in that very first second that his eyes landed on her, his heart knew that it was meant to love her, that she was there his entire life and he had just had to find her.

“Are you married?” Avery asked.

Maxim shook his head.

“No,” he said. “We aren’t married, but I have a partner. You met her. Ivy.”

Avery nodded.

“Yes,” he said, seeming to remember the brief introduction that Maxim had given him to Ivy after they found the men in the panic room. “I remember her. I’m sorry that she went back to Uoria. I know that you would rather have her here.”

Maxim nodded.

“I would,” he said. “But she needs to be there. She needs to be safe. One day, when this is all over and everything has become peaceful again, I plan on marrying her and having our life together. We’ve been preparing for war nearly since we met, and though I wouldn’t give up even a second of the time that we have had together, I’d like to know what it’s like to just live. I want to be able to decide where we’re going to settle down and then just have a normal life together. I want to be able to go to sleep with her not being afraid of what might happen in the middle of the night or what we might have to do the next day. It might not seem like much, but it’s everything to me.”

He saw Avery hesitate slightly as if he had something on his mind and then the human pilot looked up at him.

“Can I ask you something?” Avery asked. “It’s something that I probably should have asked you when I first met you, but there never seemed to be an appropriate moment.”

Maxim glanced over his shoulder to where Lynx, Zyyr, and Lila were sitting in the corner. They all had expressions on their faces that told Maxim that they were feeling the same sense of wariness about the question that he was. They had shared his hesitation at including Avery, but hadn’t questioned him when he agreed to make the man a part of it. He knew that he had to be cautious with the way that he approached Avery’s questions so that he could balance making sure that he remained involved effectively and that the rest of the group stayed comfortable.

“What do you want to know?” he asked, looking back at Avery.

“I know that the ship got redirected by people you are calling Valdicians when it was meant to go to Earth.”

“Yes,” Maxim said. “We were supposed to be going to Earth to join others who are already there, the ones who should be here soon.”

Avery nodded.

“Why?” he asked.

It was a simple question, but one that held heavy meaning. Maxim knew that they had been vague about what they were facing and had given only the most basic of information so that the human men from the crew could understand at least some of what was happening. They had chosen not to give details and to avoid describing what was happening both on Earth and back on Uoria, and now Avery wanted to know more. Maxim knew that they had come to a crossroads. This man had already offered his loyalty to them twice and had already faced serious danger without even knowing what he was doing or why. He remembered what it was like when Creia admitted that he had kept so much vital information from his own people, not revealing the true origins of their compound or even that he knew that the Klimnu who were their most hated enemies had once been Mikana and that they had vowed their revenge on him and his kind because he had refused to help them when they mutated. He knew the feeling of betrayal and pain that came from finding out that his father was still alive and that he had spent his entire life agonizing over the moment that he left home for the final time. It was painful for everyone involved to discover that they had been kept in the dark, especially after they had already been fighting. If Avery was going to put himself in danger and give of himself to help them, he deserved to know why.

Maxim glanced at the rest of the group again and saw Zyyr give a small nod as if acknowledging the position that they were in and giving his approval for Maxim to tell Avery what he needed to know. Maxim took a breath and started to speak. As he told him everything, his mind traveled back and he felt like he was reliving some of the moments from the past several months that brought them here. He could feel the burn of his skin where the toxins started to mutate him into a Klimnu and Ciyrs wrapped his bare hand around him. He could see the pain in Ivy’s eyes again as they struggled to stay connected during the dark moments when they had been torn apart by her resistance to being on Uoria and his determination to follow through with what he knew that he needed to do. He could hear the pain in Rain’s voice as she revealed who the humans were and told them of crashing on the planet after their failed mission to what would later come to be known as Penthos. It was strangely cathartic to pour out the entire story, and yet Maxim could feel himself instinctively holding back, struggling against what he was saying as if there was a part of him that still wanted to protect himself and the rest.