I woke up later that night, untangling myself from the beautiful girl I’d fallen into bed with in an act of quiet desperation last night. Delilah’s silky hair spread out on the pillow around her, the sheet slipping off her body to reveal her sweet curves, she was a slice of Heaven.

Just looking at her now made my stomach twist with desire to protect her, and make her happy. I remembered reading somewhere that we were all in search of someone whose demons play well with ours, but in my case Delilah cast out my demons. Everything that haunted me and had me running from my life, she dulled. With her by my side, none of it mattered anymore. The only thing that mattered was her. My whole life I was searching for the light, and in Delilah I finally found blinding peace.

I loved the way she twisted her lips in a cocky grin when something was on her mind, I loved teasing her and listening to her laugh. I loved her hands touching me; it felt like silk caressing my skin. I loved making love to her. I loved seeing the way we fit perfectly when we made love, until I lost the concept of where she began and I ended. It wasn’t me and her anymore, it was us.

I loved everything about her.

Which is what made this next part so complicated.

I snagged my phone off the table, then headed for the balcony, stepping outside in the cool air to clear my head. I had to do something about the phone call I’d received earlier. Falling into bed with Delilah wasn’t exactly dealing with it. I typed a few terms into the search bar, looking for ideas on how best to help the situation. It wasn’t a new one, I’d been getting calls just like this for years, I was just sick of never finding a resolution to all the pain that seemed to follow me.

“Everything okay?” Delilah’s angelic voice whispered. There she was, stepping onto the balcony to join me.

“Mmm, I’m perfect.” I sat down and pulled her into my lap. With the sheet wrapped around her body, I wanted to unwrap her, kiss every inch of her skin and make love to her all over again. “You smell like me.” I loved that. I loved that her scent was now mixed with mine, like I had marked her. In some weird way, I was proud. I was proud that this amazing woman with so much passion, strength, and beauty would let me in. She welcomed me into her warmth and I was determined to show her, for the rest of my life, just how much I worshiped her. She would never again be lonely, scared, or want for anything. I would let her know just how much she meant to me. Every breath I took would be for her, every action, every thought for her and her alone.

Delilah’s smile deepened as her eyes closed and she nestled into my neck. Stray strands of her hair danced on the breeze and curled around my face. Christ, how I loved having her in my arms.

“What are you doing out here?” Delilah asked.

I sighed, hesitant to unload all of my baggage on her at once. “Got a phone call from home. My dad needs some help.”

“Is he okay?” The concern bleeding from her eyes cracked open my heart.

“He’s okay right now, but I guess he’s having some issues…” I paused, unsure of how to say the next part.

“You can tell me, no judgement.” She smiled softly before pressing a kiss to my lips.

“My dad is an alcoholic.” I thrust a hand through my hair. “I’ve been sending him money, more than enough to cover his bills, but apparently he’s not paying them. He’s behind on the mortgage. I knew I should have just paid it off, but he insisted he didn’t want my money. God knows what he’s been doing with the money every month, but one of his buddies gave me a call and said he’s been hanging out at the local casino,” I finished, feeling a little lighter for having shared it with someone.

“I’m so sorry.” Delilah pushed a piece of hair off my forehead. I was so glad she was here. Going back to my room alone last night had felt like a nightmare. I wanted to lose myself in her, forget about all the tough stuff and just be us together.

“I don’t know what to do. The old man is so stubborn. It’s like he almost resents it when I offer to help.”

“Has he ever gone to an AA meeting? Maybe that could help…”

“Nah, he refuses. People like him don’t need community support, he likes to say. I don’t get it, but what I know for sure is this isn’t the right path. I haven’t even been to see him in over a year, says he’s too busy for company.”

“Cash…that’s terrible.”

“I’m used to it. He’s been this way most my life. That’s even the reason I started playing baseball. It was his favorite sport. The only time we ever spent time together was in front of the TV watching the game. I thought if I played, he’d hang out with me more, be proud of me, and for a while he was, at least I think so, but the older he got, the more he started drinking, the less he cared. Then baseball became my escape, suddenly it was something that was mine, and I didn’t want him to have anything to do with it. Thank God for practice six nights a week—it kept me out of that house where he was drinking himself to death.”

“What does your mom think?”

I looked up at the spray of silver stars in the sky and closed my eyes. “She died when I was fifteen. A massive heart attack. He’s been worse since.”

Without words, Delilah wrapped her arms around my neck, holding on tightly as my hands trailed around her back. I sucked in a deep breath, memories of little league and home runs and hotdogs flooding my memories. Dad hadn’t always been there, sometimes too drunk to even wake up in time, but Mom had always gone. She’d sit in the bleachers every game those first few years, cheering me on, until life had gotten the best of her. My mother was such a gentle and beautiful woman. I missed her. I missed the sound of her voice, the way she always smelled like fresh-cut violets, I even missed how she would scold me. I just missed her.

I’d raised myself after she died. My father had never really been a dad, but my mom, she always made sure that I did the right thing, pushing me to succeed in life. When she died I could have gone in so many directions, but to honor her memory, I did the right things. I never wanted my mother to be ashamed of me. I hoped that, wherever she was, she was smiling down on me and proud of the man she raised me to become.

“How can we help your dad?” Delilah asked a few minutes later.

“Well, I'm gonna call the bank in the morning and get his payments straightened out. I’ll probably just pay off the damn house. I’m so sick of dealing with this. And then I don’t have to worry about sending him checks that he’s spending God knows where. But he won’t go to rehab, Delilah, I know him…”

“Maybe he could talk to an addiction specialist. Send one to his house, even just to get a read on his situation.”

I nodded, her words sinking in. “That’s a good idea, I don’t even think he’d let me in the house if I went.”

“You send him a check every month, but he won’t talk to you?”

I shook my head, feeling the sting of what seemed an impossible situation. “Sometimes it’s easier to say nothing, I guess.”

“I know what you mean.” Her eyes turned away, her fingers twisting together before she continued. “My dad played ball for a lot of years. My entire life was spent on the ball field, and it seemed like he didn’t want anything to do with us unless we were talking about baseball. He let the life get the best of him.” Delilah peered up at me. “My dad spent the offseason drunk, running around on my mom. I think he figured life wasn’t worth it if he wasn’t playing baseball.” Her beautiful lips turned down sadly, and I wanted to kiss that sadness right off her face. “There were always guys over at the house all hours of the night, I even caught him stumbling and drunk with a groupie one night. It was bad. I swore I’d never subject myself to that once I was old enough to leave. I swore I wouldn’t find myself in my mom’s position, trying to tame a wild animal. He shouldn’t have had a family. He didn’t know how to love them enough.”

I traced circles on her wrist, wishing more than anything I could find a way to take away her pain. It all made so much sense now, the chip on her shoulder, her aversion to ball players. She wasn’t kidding when she said she had triggers, it was clear the scars from her past were deep. “You didn’t deserve that. Delilah.”

She pushed a stray lock of hair behind her ear, looking everywhere but at me.

“Hey,” I caught her chin between my fingers. “I mean it, and I can promise you I’m not that guy.”

“They all say that.” Her grin twisted ruefully.

“But they don’t all mean it.”

Delilah nodded, her eyes following mine before I wrapped her in my arms again, pulling her against my body and kissing her. “Let’s forget about that right now. I’ve got you here, and I want to take advantage.”

Delilah giggled when I lifted her in my arms, standing from the chair and carrying her back into the bedroom. “I have to say, I kind of like you taking advantage of me.”

“Good, I need to do it a lot more.” I swallowed her giggle with my kiss, and just like that, I was lost in her again.

We all have an addiction, and Delilah was mine.