Chapter Fifteen
Jenna couldn’t decide if Seb was a complete idiot for wanting to expose Stanton and save her, or if it was the most heroic, endearing thing anyone had ever done for her. Either way, she couldn’t see it bringing him—bringing them both—anything but more danger.
His theory about Stanton working under his own agenda had her torn. On one hand, she wanted it to be true because it would almost make sense, that for some reason her ex-handler wanted her out of the way and not CI as a whole. It would also mean she didn’t have to spend the rest of her life on the run.
On the other hand, she’d known Stanton for a long time and found it almost impossible to believe he’d ever do anything that hadn’t been sanctioned by his superiors. The man’s methods might be questionable, but his loyalty had never wavered.
Since Sub-Doctor Moore had discharged Seb from med level a few minutes ago, they’d barely said two words to one another as they made their way back to Seb’s apartment.
For his part, Seb had been fairly subdued after his outburst. If anyone had told her the day she’d met the outrageous, laugh-in-the-face-of-danger cowboy fighter pilot that he had so much buried pain, she never would have believed it. Never would have thought him capable of such an emotional eruption.
Whatever had happened with Lawler—and she now had enough pieces to form a pretty troublesome picture—it had affected Seb on a fundamental level. Not that he wanted anyone to know.
She didn’t believe for a second Seb had any idea about his friend’s true identity. He was the kind of soldier who would always put his duty first, especially if it meant protecting his squad. He had to be blaming himself for letting Lawler fool him. No doubt, that was a big source of the pain tried to keep buried inside. If only her time wasn’t running out. If only she had some way to help him in return.
They arrived at the apartment, and Seb led her inside. He headed straight for his bedroom, while she pulled her comm out of her pocket and launched the scan to check for new bugs, especially since Stanton was so fixated on Seb.
Almost immediately, the app on her comm started picking up signals. One monitoring device here in the sitting room and another in the kitchen. Audio only, no visual. And none in the bedroom or bathroom. Weird. Usually Stanton was anal about ensuring he had complete surveillance coverage, while these measures seemed half-baked at best.
She slipped her comm away, grabbed her datapad off the coffee table, and went into the bedroom, finding Seb had changed into his own clothes. Not his FP uniform, but military looking cargo pants and a plain T-shirt.
As she dropped to sit on the edge of Seb’s bed, she tapped her datapad to check how the computer program to decrypt the comm from the dead agent was coming along. Frustratingly, it’d only reached 60 percent. At this rate, it’d take another day to finish, and she no longer had that time.
“Why are you doing that in here? There’s a perfectly good couch out there—well, maybe perfect isn’t the right word considering the lumpy cushions.”
“Stanton bugged the main rooms.” She made some minor adjustments to the program, though they probably wouldn’t speed things up much, but she needed to be doing something.
“What do you mean Stanton bugged the main rooms?”
She leaped at Seb’s near yell and slapped a hand over his mouth.
“Shh! You want him to hear you?”
He wrapped his fingers around her wrist and tugged her hand down. “How can you be so calm about this?” This time, his voice came out lower and quieter. She shifted toward him, until there was nothing between them but clothes.
“It comes with the territory. It’ll be fine. The place isn’t completely tapped. There are only two devices—one in the sitting room and one in the kitchen. Audio only. As long as we’re careful, they won’t be an issue.”
“So now I have to watch what I say, play the game in my own apartment?” Frustration tensed his expression. “How long will I have to keep that up for?”
“Not more than a day.” She ran her fingers through his hair, near his temple, wishing she could instantly fix all this for him.
“So it’s nearly over, that program you’re running on the comm is almost done?”
“It’s taking too long.” Her other hand came up to rest on his shoulder. It seemed like the thing to do since they were pressed up against one another.
“Is there something you can do about that?” His fingers trailed over her collarbone and up her neck.
“There is, but it’s risky. Unfortunately, with Stanton closing in, I don’t think we’ve got much of a choice.”
His hand slid to the small of her back, pressing her hips closer. “We’re mired this deep, might as well keep digging.”
“You know what happens when you keep digging? More often than not, you end up with a grave.”
This wasn’t like her, to balk at doing what needed to be done. But in the past, it had only been her own life on the line. She’d come to care for Seb and hated that she’d put him in this mess. If it weren’t for the fact that someone wanted him dead, she would have cut and run by now.
“Yeah? Well, maybe we can bury Stanton in it.” He leaned in, dark eyes intense. “Come on, Jenna. It can’t be any more dangerous than anything else we’ve faced this week. Don’t quit on me now.”
She sighed. “Okay. I can get the program to complete the decryption within a matter of minutes, but I need to run it off the Knox’s systems, because the ship obviously has a much bigger, faster mainframe than a datapad. But if anyone is monitoring for unusual activity—which is a distinct possibility considering the CSS double agents that have been found—then we could get caught by either Stanton and CI or the Knox’s military police.”
“And if we wait, Stanton could find out I never had a neighbor kid called Jenna and we end up with the same results.”
“So you see the dilemma.”
“I’ve never been good at sitting around waiting. I’d rather be proactive. Where’s the best place for you to connect to the Knox’s systems?”
This might not be the best idea, but she agreed about being proactive. She grabbed the datapad to bring up a basic schematic of the ship. Seb shifted in behind her, pressing his body to her back, hands on her hips in a way that was stupidly distracting.
“It’ll have to be somewhere, that, if we are caught, it’ll take a few minutes for anyone to reach us. A minute or two could be all the difference between getting caught and escaping. Also, somewhere with minimal cameras, because I’ll have to take them offline temporarily. So, somewhere security either won’t notice or it’s not unusual for surveillance to be down.”
The Knox was a huge battleship, but personnel were pretty well packed into every corner.
Seb, leaned over her shoulder, pointing a finger at the screen. “How about one of the lower launch bays? They’re not used very often, and are staffed minimally with only a few maintenance crew.”
She shook her head. “Surveillance on launch bays is extra tight because they’re exit or entry points to the ship.”
“The officer’s wardroom on squadron level.”
“The squad officer’s wardroom is the opposite of low key.”
“But it’ll be empty. Alpha is off-shift and Bren has an inter-ship training mission. Plus, officers are allowed to turn off all surveillance when discussing sensitive matters. So if the cameras are down in there, no one will question it.”
Risk-wise, it seemed ridiculous to brazenly access the Knox’s systems from the middle of the ship’s second-best secured level.
“I can’t just walk onto squad level. It’s restricted access.”
Seb straightened, pulling his comm out of his pocket. “I’ll send Bren a message and tell her I want to give you a tour, show you the fighter jets before you deploy. She’ll be fine with it, and you’ll be clear for temporary access.”
He tapped away at his comm before she’d even agreed. Not that she would have argued. It was a good plan. Probably the best one they could have come up with, considering the circumstance.
In a matter of seconds, Bren replied with an affirmative, and they were heading out of Seb’s apartment.
There weren’t as many soldiers around as she’d expected on the deck designated for the fighter pilots. The setup was extensive and convenient, encompassing everything from the alpha launch bays, to a gym, training rooms, meeting rooms, a common room for the pilots’ downtime and several other amenities that meant the squad members didn’t have to go far for whatever they needed, especially when they were on-shift.
Seb greeted a couple of people, but the place was well deserted.
“Where is everyone?” she asked.
“Half the squad is off-shift, because we work a long-hours schedule—twenty-four hours on, followed by thirty-six hours off. Most of the on-shift squad have left for the training mission with the Farr Zero fighter pilots, so there are only a handful of pilots left to run a skeleton crew.”
He led her through a hatchway into a large room set up with a conference table, a couple of couches, and most importantly, several ports to connect a datapad into the Knox’s systems. Pausing by the door, he accessed a control screen and tapped in several commands.
“Okay, the surveillance on this room is dark. We’re good to go.”
Her heart thumped as she crossed the room and took a seat at the large table, slotting her datapad into the port while a virtual keyboard appeared on the surface.
It’d been a long time since she’d been nervous about the outcome of a mission. But this was no ordinary mission. This was her entire life on the line here. Hers and Seb’s. No pressure or anything.
She reconnected the comm from the dead agent to her datapad, then relaunched the program, which leaped into hyperspeed.
“It’s working. In a few minutes, we should be able to backtrack where the last message originated from.”
Seb parked his butt on the desk near her. “And then all we have to do is find some kind of evidence to tie Stanton to this whole thing, and we can go to Commander Yang.”
She glanced up at him. “I don’t want to burst your bubble, but getting evidence to stick to someone like Stanton will be like trying to make butter stay on a hot ship’s hull.”
“You’re right. Let’s not burst my bubble. Let’s just have this thing lead us to him, and we’ll work out the rest later.” Seb pushed up and paced a few steps away. “How much longer?”
Yep, waiting was definitely not one of his strongest attributes.
“Not long,” she replied distractedly.
He paced back to brace both hands on the top of the chair she sat in. “Not long as in a few minutes, or not long as in a few seconds?”
“Remind me to bring you a chew toy next time we go on one of these adventures,” she muttered.
“Oh, burn.” She felt him kneel behind her and lean in close to her ear. “That was really mean. I think you hurt my feelings.”
“I’ll do more than hurt your feelings if you keep distracting me.” She tried to push him back, but he caught her wrists.
“Is mixing business with pleasure one of the many things they frown on in CI?” He closed the distance, his mouth landing on her neck and shooting an immediate shiver down her spine.
“Being distracted and failing to carry out a mission is one of the many things they frown on in CI.” She twisted one of her wrists free to make a final adjustment to the program, which was just about complete.
But damn it, Seb’s lips were trailing up her neck, and she had to input the command twice before the code was accepted.
She turned in the chair and grabbed a handful of Seb’s hair, pulling him back.
“Ouch. Watch the goods.” Despite the words, he didn’t seem overly offended, considering the way he was grinning.
“Anyone ever tell you that you’re really good at being annoying when you want to be?”
“Shh, it’s my superpower.” He winked, but instead of exasperating her more, she found him too charming. Like usual.
She shifted her grip from his hair to his chin. “It’s lucky you’re so handsome, or I might’ve shot you by now.”
“Someone else already tried. Didn’t go down so well.”
At the instantly sobering reminder of his recent injury, the momentary happiness and distraction of his flirting submerged under a new wave of desperation.
“Don’t do that,” he murmured, gaze intent on her.
“Do what?” She let him go, but he caught her hand before she could turn away in the chair.
“Wherever your thoughts just went right now. It took all the light out of your eyes. And I hate it when that happens. Despite everything, all the years you spent working in CI, you still have this amazing light of sincerity in your eyes. It was one of the first things I noticed, even before you took off all the appearance-altering tech. It was how I knew it was you in that bank vault. Your eyes gave you away.”
“Seb—” Nothing else came out after she uttered his name. Maybe half the time he flirted and joked and didn’t seem to take things seriously. But when he went and said something like that, let his true personality show beneath all the layers he’d insulated himself under, there was no doubt that deep down, Seb was a sensitive, caring, compassionate man. The kind of man it’d be too easy to fall in love with.
So instead of saying anything, trying to come up with words that wouldn’t convey anywhere near the right sentiments, she touched her lips gently to his.
Something sparked between them, but it wasn’t mind-melting in its intensity or liable to set them both aflame. Instead, it was slow and deep and enthralling. It captivated her very soul, the sensation of it spiraling into the very depths of her being.
The datapad chimed and she pulled back, but only far enough to find herself looking at Seb. They stared at each other, and it was like they were really seeing each other for the first time, with no pretenses and no issues to distort the view.
Something elemental shifted, a fissure cracking open to reveal a hole she hadn’t even realized had hollowed out the middle of her heart. And she could envisage Seb filling that void all too easily.
The realization left her numb. How stupid was it to suddenly want a future she could never have, had never planned to have?
“You’re doing it again,” he murmured, running a finger along her jawline. “Disconnecting. Shutting down. Turning off the lights and leaving the building.”
Did he think she wanted to live like a droid, not caring, keeping herself distanced from everyone and everything? She rotated in the seat to face the datapad.
“It’s the only way to survive.”
“The only way, or the easier way?”
Her throat tightened, but she swallowed down the sensation and ignored that little jab, which was probably too close to the truth.
“The program has tracked the origin of the message. According to this, the comm that sent the message is on the ship. Commerce level.” She disconnected, then removed the datapad from the port on the desk and stood. “Let’s see who this leads to.”
Seb had stepped right up behind her, leaving her face-to-face with him when she spun around.
“Once we get the answer, we’re going to head back to my apartment. Then you and I are going to make an actual plan. One that puts you in the clear so you don’t have to spend the rest of your life on the run.”
She appreciated the sentiment, but she didn’t have the emotional wherewithal to deal with it right now.
“Let’s just get this over with before we lose the signal.”
His expression darkened, as though he was quite aware she was dodging the issue. “Fine. But one last thing.”
He caught her up against him, this time catching her lips in a kiss that was nothing but fire and passion. Like a promise of what they could have had if they’d been different people, or simply met under different circumstance. With his mouth against hers, reality was consumed until there was nothing left but Seb and bright golden flames spreading through her body.
The sound of the door opening jolted her entire system like taking a thousand volts straight to the heart. For the first time since she’d joined CI, in that moment when Seb had been kissing her, she’d been completely lost, unaware of anything else around her. Her automatic reaction sent her on the defensive and she half spun, putting herself in front of Seb and yanking out the gun she always kept concealed.
A half grin on his face, Alpha held up his hands. “Sorry, didn’t mean to startle you. And I’m going to pretend that’s a comm in your hand, since only a select few senior officers are permitted to carry on the ship.”
She blew out an uneven breath as she slipped the gun away while Seb shifted to stand beside her. “Sorry, I’m a bit on edge.”
“Since Seb was shot? Understandable.” Alpha dropped his hands, shooting an exasperated look at Seb. “Speaking of which, shouldn’t you be resting? Making out in the officer’s wardroom definitely doesn’t qualify.”
“Wanted to give Jenna a tour of the fighter jets before she deployed,” he replied, clearing his throat after his voice came out a little scratchy.
“Uh-huh,” Alpha drawled. “There’s certainly a great view of the jets from in here.”
Seb took her hand, twining their fingers together. “Ha ha, very funny. We were just leaving.”
Tugging her hand, he pulled her into a walk, passing by Alpha.
“Right. I’m sure leaving is exactly where things were headed a second ago.” Seb shot an annoyed glare over his shoulder, but Alpha only smirked. “Just know you’re lucky Bren wasn’t the one who caught you. She’d be busting your ass if she knew you were using the officer’s wardroom for recreational purposes.”
At the hatchway, Seb paused to send a curious look toward Alpha. “Why aren’t you?”
His expression took on a roguish edge. “Let’s just say Mia and I were rather adventurous in our travels before anyone knew about us.”
Seb used his free hands to cover his eyes. “Oh God, I don’t want to know what that means. Come on, Jenna, let’s get out of here before he can scar me for life.”
His laugh followed them out into the passageway toward the transit.
A spike of apprehension sliced through her as they waited for the transit to arrive so they could head for commerce level. They were about to get the identity of whoever had sent the kill order. She hadn’t been this nervous about the outcome of a mission since she’d been a rookie. It felt like exposing this person—whom she fully expected to be Stanton—would break away the last little piece of the ledge that had been holding up her entire life.