When Jason pulled out of her body and rolled away, she knew.
Whatever had passed between them while connected physically, he’d felt it too.
And now he was disconnecting.
She moaned her displeasure at his early withdrawal, their powerful chemistry enhanced by an inaugural round of sex for the ages.
Lying next to each other but not touching, they caught their breath and collected their thoughts. At least, that’s what Tessa was doing. He could be analyzing Einstein’s theory of relativity, and how it applied to the law of gravitation in relation to the forces of nature, for all she knew.
He was checked out.
Mustering enough energy to move her arm, she gingerly dabbed her scalp. No goose egg or obvious signs of head trauma. A plus, but honestly, that experience was worth a little water on the brain.
The air conditioning kicked on, cold air rushing over her body, and she shivered, wanting to burrow under the covers with him and drift into a sexually-induced slumber until the Dine-and-Dash opened for breakfast. Tomorrow’s special was homemade sugared doughnuts with warm maple glaze.
But first, she had to force her legs to close.
Big man. Very big man.
She smiled and turned to look at him, ready to sing his praises again, but stopped short at what she saw.
Unmoving, he had an arm thrown over his eyes, head turned away. A lit road sign flashing the words Danger - Stay Back would be less subtle than the body language he was sporting.
Not a comforting sight.
Sliding her hand across the purple bedspread, she timidly tangled her fingers in his. The touch spurred something in him, because he rolled out of bed and walked into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him with a solid click.
He never even glanced her way.
“That was rude,” she called out.
Into thin air, it seemed, when he didn’t respond.
Her muscles groaning in protest, she sat up, mumbling, “You need etiquette lessons,” to an empty room.
He could go ahead and make this whole thing about sex. Keep all emotion out. That’s what she’d signed up for.
But she wasn’t going to be dismissed the instant the deed was done. There were social protocols in place when it came to casual sex. Idle chitchat about new releases on Netflix or what was trending on Twitter. Worst case, the ten-day weather forecast or what grade of fuel was giving the best gas mileage these days. Anything to divert attention from the smell of sex while redressing.
On wobbly legs, she turned the air off before icicles formed.
“You had your tongue in places only my gynecologist sees, so holding my hand shouldn’t be an issue.”
If he heard her—and he had to because she’d shouted it—he gave no sign.
Not bothering with clothes, she flung open the bathroom door. “It’s not like I asked you to set a date.”
Jason stood facing the vanity, hands braced on the counter, head hung.
She was momentarily distracted by his bare ass. Jesus, did the man not have a single physical flaw? Because the back of him was almost as good as the front.
Almost.
“Knock much?” Their eyes met in the mirror’s reflection, but his question wasn’t angry or sarcastic.
There wasn’t enough emotion for it to be.
Before she could respond, he brushed past her and snagged his jeans from the floor. Sliding them on but leaving the button-fly undone, he walked out of the motel room without a word. No shoes, no shirt, no lip service.
Passionate lover to detached stranger before the sheets cooled.
It left her stunned, especially when she’d noticed Brutus looking eager for round two. It’s not like she’d deny him. His front was damn good, and she had an extra condom ready to go. The sex had been fantastic. Better than ever.
Maybe he wasn’t as impressed. Maybe she was a cold fish. Maybe any woman would’ve done.
Maybe she was losing her ever-loving mind trying to understand a self-proclaimed asshole.
Slipping on her wrinkled t-shirt and a fresh, untorn, pair of undies, she peeked through the curtains. It was impossible to miss his silhouette, outlined by the neon glow of pool lights below.
Steeling herself for rejection, she opened the door, wincing when the hinges creaked in the quiet night.
Back to her, he stood leaning against the iron railing, arms propped on the rickety handrail. He had a lot more faith in that railing than she did. It was a good twenty-foot drop to the sidewalk below.
Whatever he saw in the murky depths of chlorinated pool water must be magical, because his gaze never wavered. Meanwhile, she stood in the open doorway, freezing her baguettes off.
She waited for him to acknowledge her.
He didn’t.
Her outrage at being ignored overruled her modesty, and she stepped onto the cold concrete, tugging the hem of her t-shirt. It didn’t stretch past the band on her plain white bikini underwear. She looked up and down the balcony for other guests, more concerned about their partial nudity than him. Praise above, they were alone.
Nobody around to witness their ugly morning-after conversation.
A one-sided conversation, apparently.
The pool must be fresh out of answers, because he finally tilted his head, this time toward the westbound lanes of the highway.
Being the bigger person, Tessa broke the silence.
“No traffic tonight,” she murmured. “You can make it to the Mexican border by dawn. Canada in a day, if you drive straight through.” Her tone held no judgment. “You’re ready to run, so why not flee the country to be safe. I’ll flush my passport to prove I won’t take chase.”
Zilch. Zero.
She let out a sarcastic laugh.
She had the worst luck with men. There’d never been a single one in her life that hadn’t let her down—her brother-in-law aside, only because he was an anomaly and on her payroll. It started when she was young and here she was again, staring at the naked, corded back of the most hardheaded one yet.
Leaning against the doorjamb, she stacked her bare feet, her anger not enough to chase away the chill.
“You know what, Jason? I’m gonna do the polite thing here, because Patti raised me with manners.” She blamed her trembling voice on the cold air, not the pain of his rejection. “I had a really nice time tonight. And I’m not talking about the sex.”
He didn’t respond. Didn’t even look at her.
He stared at the goddamn highway with boorish indifference while she got angrier by the second.
The cinder block walls echoed her follow-up. “But the two orgasms did help, so thank you very much.”
That got through.
He looked at her but didn’t speak, the stranger in the bar again. The big, bad wolf nobody dared approach.
“Seriously?” She lifted her arms, not afraid to take him on. “You don’t have anything to say?”
He straightened, gripping the back of his neck. “What do you want me to say?”
“I don’t know. Something. Anything.” Irritated he was detaching when she was dying to cling, her voice rose. “How about, ‘thanks for the memories, I wish you the best in your future endeavors.’ Or, ‘what do you want for breakfast, doughnuts or pancakes?’ Or, ‘gosh, that was the worst lay of my life, so I’m gonna ease on down the road now’?”
Pointing for emphasis, she fought the urge to poke him. “Or here’s a good one. ‘I’m having difficulty processing what happened tonight, and while I’m not ready or able to speak about it, please don’t take my silence to mean fuck you and the horse you rode in on.’”
She held her arms out. “That’d be the one I’d go with, but hey, that’s just me. Caring about other people’s feelings and all.”
“I warned you.” His voice was aggravatingly calm. “Not my fault you didn’t listen.”
“Yeah, I wish I’d told you to go fuck yourself when I had the chance.” That was a bald-faced lie, but it sounded good. “Consider this me telling you now.”
Eyes stinging, she fought the rising tide of emotion before she did something really humiliating.
Like cry in front of him.
“I know this was a random bang to you, but Vegas is just a few hours away.” She hitched her finger sideways. “Why bother with the sunset seduction scene if you only wanted a whore? No twenty-spot pizza and conversation required.”
Boy howdy, that got a response.
He was in her face before she saw him move.
“Don’t degrade yourself like that.” The growl was low, demanding.
“Then don’t make me feel that way!”
His face softened, and he turned away, cursing under his breath. “I don’t think that about you. Don’t think that about yourself.”
Thirty hours. That’s the sum of how long she’d known him. It was staggering how quickly she’d become emotionally invested, and it was unreasonable to think he’d done the same. He’d fully disclosed his limitations, listing several convincing arguments.
But none mentioned he’d go into communication lockdown.
“Grab the rest of your clothes,” she said, hugging herself. “I wanna go to bed.”
Moving by her while she stood in the doorway, he grabbed his stuff, not bothering to dress. The chilly air didn’t affect him, his skin radiating heat.
She stared at the gold-framed painting of a lavender lilac tree hanging above the disheveled bed, waiting for his exit. She’d never look at lilacs the same again.
“Tessa.”
In the act of slamming the door behind him—if it hit him on the ass, so be it—his gruff voice stopped her.
“It wasn’t a seduction scene. Earlier tonight. And I agree. It was nice.”
She shrugged but said nothing. There was only one person that should be talking, and it wasn’t her.
“I’m having difficulty,” he finally admitted, using her words.
He waited, probably hoping she’d offer platitudes and fawn over his ripped torso so he could escape the situation with a three-word excuse.
His torso was mesmerizing, for sure. And yes, she’d inspected it, noting her fingernail marks on his shoulder blades. But being drop-dead sexy could only take him so far. His silence wounded.
“I don’t—” Stumbling, a rare trait for him, he exhaled. “I don’t have difficulty.”
It was a declaration.
Something a human would say.
“I have to think. Clear my head.” He dipped his knees, going eye-to-eye with her, searching her gaze.
She nodded before turning away, grateful he didn’t see her tears as she closed the door, leaving him on the other side.
Thinking and clearing were tasks that took minimal time. Both could be done during a long shower in a purple bathroom or a long run on a rural highway. But minutes later, when his truck pulled out and headed west, Tessa wasn’t sure she’d ever see him again.
And she wasn’t sure why, after only thirty hours, Jason’s exodus hurt worse than Mac’s infidelity.
She just knew it did.