What would you do if a stranger asked you questions about spanking? Run for the hills or feel intrigued enough to ask questions?
I don’t know what came over me. I was in a social situation, bored out of my brain and started thinking about spanking out of self-defense. Hey! Can I help it if spanking preys on my mind these days?
Anyhow, instead of the same boring getting-to-know-you conversation, I asked about spanking. It made the interaction interesting, livened things up a little. The reactions fell into two camps. The men were either for or totally against spanking. One guy was disappointed because he thought I wanted to spank him. Call me an innocent, but it never occurred a man would want to be on the end of a spanking. You learn something every day.
I learned something else too. Most of the men who were open to spanking immediately let their minds jump into the gutter. I could see it in their faces. They wondered what else I would do. One of them asked me if he could meet me later for a quickie in the car park. Another asked if I was open to anything. When I asked for clarification, he mentioned BDSM. His eyes glittered with a scary light when he mentioned whips and chains. He might have mentioned anal sex as well, but I was too busy trying to change the subject to take in everything. He was creepy.
All of this made me realize I need to stop talking about my desires. I’m with a man who makes me feel good. The sex is pure dynamite between us, and I live for the times when we’re together.
We’ve learned a lot about each other and something in his background makes it difficult for me to tell him what I’d like, what I need. I guess what I’m trying to say is I’ve come to care for him and I don’t want to drive him away. On the other hand, I know I won’t be happy until I try spanking.
LOL, I’ve had a thought. What happens if the reality doesn’t match my fantasies? What happens if, after all this time, I hate spanking and it does nothing for me except give me a sore bottom? Yeah, wouldn’t that be a real kick? A spanking aficionado who hates receiving a spanking.
Maggie yawned and slapped at the alarm clock, wishing she could laze in bed for longer. Wasn’t gonna happen.
She dragged herself out of the bed and stood. The twisted sheets told the story. She’d tossed and turned for half the night, worried about her most recent blog entry. The post got right to the point. What if she was all talk and no action? A pretender?
She padded to bathroom and flipped on shower. A decision. She needed one. Today.
Either she had to man up and tell Connor what she wanted—exactly what she wanted—or she needed to move on. Use the terms of their friends with benefits deal to find a man who would spank her without a qualm.
A man without baggage.
An hour later, she ran through the front doors of Barker & Johnson. No puffing. This fitness kick was good for something. Maggie hit the elevator button and tapped her foot while waiting for the car to arrive. Long minutes later the elevator let out a cheeky beep. The doors opened. Maggie stepped inside and waited for them to close.
They’d almost shut when a male voice called, “Hold the lift.” A hand shot between the doors at the same time Maggie hit the hold button.
“Thanks. You know those days when nothing seems to go right?” He glanced at Maggie and continued talking without waiting for her reply. “I’m having one of those days. I’m late for an appointment.”
He grinned, and Maggie couldn’t help smiling back. Taller than Greg but not as tall as Connor, the man had brown eyes full of humor and masculine appreciation. His glance darted to her left hand and back to her face. “I’m Kevin Grainger.” His blond hair was cut short and he had a designer stubble thing going on. The casual look contrasted with the charcoal gray designer suit and pale pink tie.
“Maggie Drummond,” she said, taking his extended hand. His hand bore calluses and a few cuts. A distinct warmth emanated up her arm and she held her breath. Interesting. The elevator reached her floor and came to a halt. “I hope the rest of your day improves. Um, did you choose your tie?”
“I’m getting off here too,” Kevin said with a chuckle. “My seven-year-old niece chose the tie. My sister thought I’d never wear a pink tie but my niece insisted on this one. I wanted to prove my sister wrong.” He fluttered his eyelashes. “What do you think? Does it make me look gay?”
“Your designer stubble is a perfect foil.”
“My thoughts exactly.”
They walked out of the elevator together, both laughing.
“I know this is forward of me, but could I take you out to dinner tonight? I’m not a weirdo. My accountant Greg Somerville will vouch for me.”
“Anyone who cares about making his seven-year-old niece happy must be okay,” Maggie said. “I’d love to have dinner with you.”
“Great.” Kevin pulled out his wallet and handed her a business card. “I’m staying at the Hilton on the waterfront. I can book a table at Whites for around seven. Would that work for you?”
“Seven is perfect,” Maggie said. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Greg approaching. “I’ll meet you at the restaurant.” With a wave and a quick smile, she turned away to head to her cubicle before she came face-to-face with her ex.
“Wait. I don’t have your number,” Kevin said.
“I promise I’ll be there,” Maggie said. “I won’t stand you up.”
“Maggie, you’re late. Is there a problem?” Greg asked, his stern gaze going from her to Kevin and back.
“No, no problem,” she blurted.
“Good,” Greg said, his gaze dropping to the hem of her skirt. “I’ll see you later.”
Not if she saw him first. She hadn’t missed the disapproval on his face when he’d seen her updated appearance. Too bad. She liked it, and judging by the reactions of the rest of the males around the place, they liked the new-look Maggie. Besides, she’d scored a date. She couldn’t wait to tell the girls. She wasn’t looking forward to telling Connor quite as much.
Maggie skipped down the passage to her cubicle. As usual several of her fellow employees were playing solitaire and surfing the net. She wouldn’t have time to check her email since she’d promised Tanya, one of the partners, she’d complete the Weston accounts this morning.
After switching on her computer, she immersed herself in work. She worked right through morning tea, printing off the final set of accounts before midday.
She delivered the accounts to Tanya and waited while she glanced through them.
“Great job,” Tanya said. “Thanks for getting them done so quickly. Word is out about you.”
“No problem,” she said. “Pardon?” Tanya’s final words registered. Fear clutched at her heart. What did she mean?
“Word is out about the great work you do. Greg has requested you for a special project he’s working on next month. I understand you’ve done a few jobs for him recently.”
“Oh,” Maggie said. “That’s…uh…great.” What the hell sort of game was Greg playing? Yes, he’d requested her services for three projects. Normally that wouldn’t bother her, but when she reported for duty, he treated her like a glorified junior, getting her to make coffee and complete the filing. It was true she wasn’t a qualified accountant, but she wasn’t chopped liver, either. She excelled at her job. “Was there anything else you wanted me to work on?”
Tanya ran through a quick list of assignments. “The Dobson accounts are next on the list. The Dobsons are coming in on Monday.”
“All under control,” Maggie said. “I should have them completed for you to check tomorrow.”
Five minutes later, Maggie left her cubicle, desperate for a cup of coffee and something to eat. She spotted the other members of the Tight Five at their usual table, but made a beeline to the coffee machine. She purchased a salad sandwich and went to join them.
“What did you think of the speed dating last night?” Susan asked.
“I had a bunch of strange men, apart from Connor. He wasn’t weird,” Maggie said.
“But you can’t date Connor,” Christina said.
“Why not?” Connor said in a mild voice. “What’s wrong with me?”
“There’s nothing wrong with you, Connor. Christina didn’t mean it like that,” Susan spoke up.
“What did Christina mean then, ’cause I’m offended?” Connor puffed out his chest. “I’m a perfect date. Ask anyone.”
“But you don’t keep the fish,” Julia said. “You throw them back. Maggie wants a fisherman who keeps his fish.”
Susan chuckled. “Isn’t fish plural? Maggie doesn’t want to join a harem.”
“Not helping. Still feeling insulted,” Connor muttered.
Maggie noted his tense jaw and felt sneaking sympathy. She knew from personal experience he saw only one woman at a time. He didn’t go into relationships lightly. “Stop giving Connor a hard time. How did your dates go, Susan?”
“There were three that were reasonable and I put them on my list of men I’d like to meet again. I’m thinking of running a personal ad or joining one of those online dating sites. What do you think? Is that too sad?”
“Of course it isn’t,” Christina said. “You should let us help you vet them though. And you need to be careful. From what I’ve heard some of those men are weird. Julia, are you sure none of your dates are worth meeting again?”
“Positive,” Julia said in a crisp voice. “I scored a bunch of losers.”
“Did you have Connor?” Susan asked.
Connor made a protesting sound. “Still offended here, people.”
Maggie laughed. “Stop picking on Connor. You know we love you, right?”
“You might, but I’m wondering about the others,” he said. The quick wink passed as a joke to the other girls, but Maggie knew he’d sent her a secret message. A blush surged into her cheeks and spread across her face. Worried the others would notice, she applied herself to opening her sandwich.
“I have a date tonight,” she said, before they could continue the speed dating discussion.
Her statement stopped the discussion flat and drew their attention. Now she had a real excuse for blushing.
Christina peered over the top of her glasses. “A date?”
“How?” Susan said.
“More to the point, who?” Julia added.
“It had better not be Greg,” Connor said with a trace of disgust. “You’re well rid of him.”
Maggie caught the trace of hurt before his face blanked. “I met him in the elevator this morning,” she said. “He asked me out for dinner, so I said yes.”
Connor scowled. “You didn’t tell him your address or phone number?”
“She’s not stupid,” Julia said. “You didn’t, did you?”
Maggie rolled her eyes. “Credit me with some sense. I’m meeting him at the restaurant.”
“What’s he like?” Christina pushed her glasses up her nose. “Why don’t I meet men in the elevator?” she added before Maggie could answer.
“I was late.” Maggie’s tone was dry. “That’s the secret.”
“In other words, meeting a man is pure luck,” Susan said. “Good to know.”
“I’d better head back to work,” Connor said. “Catch ya later.”
“Connor seems quiet,” Christina said, frowning as he strode away. “He seemed cranky last night too.”
Julia shook her head staring after him. “I don’t know. He used to drop around to see me, even when he was going out with Gwen.”
“I wonder if he’s going out with someone else,” Susan said.
“Don’t look at me,” Maggie said, ignoring the guilt rippling through her. Hopefully they put her flushed cheeks down to discussing her date. “I know nothing, except I need to get back to work.”
“Have fun on your date. We want details tomorrow.” Susan grinned. “If I can’t get lucky at least you can, although I have to tell you I’m starting to get jealous.”
Maggie settled back into work. The phone rang.
“Maggie, it’s Greg. Can you report to my office please?” He hung up before she could ask questions. Irritated, she marched down the hall and into his office.
“Ah, Maggie. I’ve talked to Tanya. You’re going to work with me for the rest of the month.”
“But… I don’t think that’s a good idea. Given our personal history, can’t you get one of the other accounting officers to work with you instead of me?”
“No.” Greg rose and circled his desk. He squatted by her chair and took her face between his hands. “I choose you.”
“What?” She stared at him. “No, I’m dating someone else. We can see each other at work and sometimes work together because we’re both adults. I’m not interested in anything else. We’ve broken up and I don’t want to date you again.” She shot to her feet. “I’ll tell Tanya you changed your mind and one of the others will work with you.”
Greg watched her run from his office. He slammed his office door and stalked around the edge of his desk.
“Damn,” he muttered and kicked his desk. He cursed and slumped into his black leather executive chair. Somehow he had to talk Maggie into going out with him again before the partners’ dinner next month. He didn’t have time to find another woman before the partners voted to decide which of the junior partners would advance to senior status. Hell, his parents liked her, and she was the perfect woman to advance his career.
He wanted that promotion.
“I deserve it, dammit.” Greg picked up his pen and thumped it on his desktop. Thump. Thump. Thump.
A plan.
Think, man. There must be something you can do to get Maggie back onside and keep her there.
Connor found himself back in the IT department without remembering walking there. All he could think of was Maggie with another man. Touching her. Kissing her. Making love to her.
He shook his head, trying to shake away the vision. His throat tightened. His hands clenched to fists. Damn, he needed a plan. He’d fallen hard for Maggie and the last thing he wanted was another man to snatch her from him.
His phone rang and he picked it up. “Grey.” He listened for a few minutes and hung up. He sighed, dragged a hand through his hair and stood. Damn, he’d expected this was coming, but he hated acting the watchdog.
“Roger. Larry. One of the big bosses is coming to talk to us about private Internet usage.”
“Aw, crap,” Larry said. “That takes the fun out of work.”
“What time is the meeting?” Roger asked.
“In half an hour.” This should be interesting. He knew a lot of the staff used the Internet for private purposes. Even he’d jumped online to check email and Maggie’s blog. Swearing under his breath, he returned to his desk.
A plan to catch Maggie. For a moment he wished he could talk to Julia, but that was impossible. This one he’d have to handle on his own.
“Man, you have to see this blog,” Larry said.
The excited light in Larry’s eyes twisted Connor’s stomach into a knot. Please, not Maggie’s blog. “You’re not meant to check all the links,” he reminded his workmate. “You’re meant to link employees to private Internet use.”
“But the blog is called Big Bad Ass. I had to check it out.”
It was Maggie’s blog. Damn, they’d been careless reading her blog at work. He couldn’t tell off the girls when he was guilty of the same crime. Surely Maggie wouldn’t be silly enough to post from work?
“Which computers have accessed this blog?” He held his breath while he waited for Larry to consult his printouts.
“At least four different computers. No, wait. It’s more than that.” He glanced at Connor. “This blog has been accessed from all over the place. You’d think if it was that popular, we’d have heard gossip.”
Belatedly Connor remembered Julia worked in different departments, depending where her secretarial services were required. “What sort of blog is it?” He asked the question knowing Larry expected curiosity.
Larry smirked. “It’s about spanking. Bring up the URL and take a look.”
Connor typed in the URL and hoped Larry didn’t notice it came up automatically after he’d typed the first few letters. Maggie had posted a new entry since he’d last checked.
I’ve been thinking about the physical act of spanking. Yes, it’s true. I’m driven to discover more in my thirst for knowledge. To date I hadn’t considered spanking positions. I’d merely thought about the act itself and the noise. Thunk. Crack. Whack. Thinking about the sounds gets me hot. Isn’t that strange?
A shudder worked through Connor. Hell, the sounds haunted him and refused to leave. Every time he read Maggie’s blog and thought about spanking her, the noises returned. The memories. The sharp cry from his mother when his father’s fist hit her face. The crunch of a bone breaking. His father’s grunt as he struck out with his hands.
And the crying.
The crying haunted him most of all. His own muffled sobs as he squeezed into a corner, trying to remain out of sight. His mother’s tears, restrained despite her pain. And his father’s loud sobs that he was sorry and it’d never happen again. A promise he broke over and over.
Connor concentrated on the computer screen forcing away the painful memories, the sense of helplessness and feeling he should’ve done something. His mother and Frank had told him it wouldn’t have made a difference. As an adult he realized his choices were limited. Intellectually, he knew there was nothing he could have done to change the course of events, but try telling that to his heart.
I came across a post in a forum I enjoy visiting. It contained a list of spanking positions. Twenty in all. Who knew? Reading through them was an eye-opener.
All I can think of now is trying the positions until I come back to my main problem.
No man to spank me.
Maybe I need to cast my net farther afield and try dating new guys. I’m not stupid enough to mention spanking on the first date but if we clicked and took our relationship into the physical, I’d mention spanking then. No matter how embarrassed I felt. That’s where I went wrong last time. I hesitated and second-guessed myself instead of stating my needs upfront. By the time I gathered courage I’d learned about my lover’s background and worried about his reaction to my request for a good spanking.
Yeah, as much as I like this guy I intend to pursue other men. And before you think I’m two-timing or being unfaithful, let me assure you I’m not. We have a casual agreement and have promised each other if someone else comes along, we’ll let the other know. We’re adults. We knew the score before we slept with each other.
Hell, wasn’t that a kick in the head. Maggie had accepted a date with this other man, and if things worked out, he was down the track. Their friends with benefits deal would end and he’d lose the one woman he could love—
Nah, he needed honesty here. He loved Maggie, and that was the problem. Too many secrets. Damn, why was it so bloody hard?
“I’d love to meet her,” Larry said. “I’ve read the blog posts. Hell, I’d spank her if she asked me. I wonder what she looks like. Probably a dog.”
“Get back to work. The partners are expecting results and a report on how to stop the problem.”
“Sure, Connor.” Larry returned to his desk and soon appeared immersed in his work.
The hours passed, and Connor left work. He met Christina and Susan on the way out, but turned down their offer of drinks. He didn’t feel in the mood and knew it showed. The last thing he wanted was a series of nosy questions.
He spent an hour prowling his apartment, thankful his two flatmates weren’t present to witness his fall. They’d joked about him getting caught one day. It seemed they were right. Finally, unable to stand his own company, he grabbed his wallet and left his apartment. There was a pub down the road. He’d order a whiskey or two and try and come up with a half-decent plan to win over Maggie. And he needed to get past his aversion to spanking her. She wouldn’t change her mind, at least until she received her spanking. If he was a lucky man, she’d hate spanking and never mention it again. And if she enjoyed the experience, he’d face that later. Come up with a new plan.
“Connor! How are you? I haven’t seen you for ages.”
Connor found himself with an armful of blonde. Automatically, he wrapped his arms around her slim body and gave her a hug before stepping back. “Jenny.”
He glanced up and met Maggie’s enigmatic gaze. Crap. Did he have a sign on his back that said, kick me? He smiled, but she didn’t return his welcome, turning her attention back to her date.
Double crap.
Ever polite, he turned his attention back to Jenny. They’d dated for about three weeks before they’d moved on with no hard feelings. “I’m good,” he said. “I haven’t seen you for a while. How have you been?”
“I’m engaged,” Jenny said, wiggling her left fingers at him. “We’re getting married next weekend.”
“Congratulations. Anyone I know?”
Jenny shook her head, settling her blonde curls in motion. “I don’t think so. I went home for the holiday weekend and met him again. We went to school together and hadn’t seen each other for years. This time we clicked.” Jenny grinned and kissed him soundly on the lips. “I’m so happy I could burst. Are you here with anyone? No? Come and meet my friends.”
Jenny dragged him over to a large table at the far end of the pub and ordered two of her friends to squeeze up so they could fit in Connor. He laughed and joked with the girls, but couldn’t have repeated a word, not when his mind dwelled on Maggie and the man she sat with on the other side of the pub.
Twenty minutes later, he watched them leave. The guy was close to his own height—over six feet tall. He had blond hair and looked fit. Connor wanted to jump to his feet and knock away the arm the man had slung around Maggie’s shoulders. He flirted with the idea of smacking him before he shook himself. That wouldn’t happen. Not unless the other man hit him first. He gazed after them, scowling. Nah, that wasn’t gonna happen either. No baiting. Maggie would never forgive him. He needed to fight for her fair and square.
“Do you know her?” Jenny asked. “You’ve been watching her ever since you arrived.”
“Yeah.” Connor let out a heavy sigh. “I know her.”
Jenny’s green eyes widened a fraction. “If I didn’t know better, I’d say you feel something for her.”
The lump in Connor’s throat blocked his words, and his silence said it all.
“I never thought I’d see the day,” Jenny gloated. “Connor Grey has fallen for a woman.”
“She doesn’t think the same way about me,” he said, a ball of misery curling through his gut. Damn, he needed out of here.
“Fight for her,” one of Jenny’s friends advised. Connor couldn’t remember her name but she was a pretty blue-eyed blonde. “A woman likes to know a man wants her.”
“I don’t want to discuss it,” Connor said, taking a slug of beer from his bottle.
“Pooh.” Another of Jenny’s friends flapped her hand in dismissal. “Don’t run away. We’re trying to help.”
“Yeah,” Jenny said. “You need to give her a night she’ll never forget. Plan something unique. Something private that says you’re thinking about her needs.”
“Oh, yes,” the blue-eyed blonde said. “And make it a night you can repeat on special occasions. That’s after you’re married. Make it memorable.”
“Married?” Connor damn near stuttered in his shock. He didn’t want to marry Maggie.
The girls shared a glance then laughed.
“Connor, you’re toast,” Jenny said. “You’re a fallen man. You love that girl. Now all you have to do is inform her.”
Connor fired up his laptop when he arrived back at his apartment after midnight. A memorable idea. Marriage. Right.
Jenny and her friends’ ideas flitted through his mind but none of them fit into a scenario that might work for him. He kept returning to the memorable night and nodded.
He went straight to Maggie’s blog, and to his surprise he found a new entry. That meant she’d gone home instead of indulging in hot sex with her date. He didn’t think she would’ve posted a blog if they’d gone back to her place, either. Unless, she’d pre-scheduled…
Connor cursed and read the post instead of thinking about Maggie in bed with the blond man.
There’s lots to think about with spanking. Positions, as I’ve mentioned. Spanking implements. I’ve also contemplated lingerie.
As someone mentioned on my favorite forum, lingerie plays an important part in a spanking. There’re the different styles to consider. Do I want my butt cheeks on display or covered with material? Should it be cotton or something silky? Different lingerie. Different sensations.
One woman mentioned G-strings. She enjoys wearing them because her ass cheeks are on display. Another woman enjoys plain cotton panties—the sort a grandmother might wear. A third woman liked silky briefs while another preferred the square-leg boy pants. She said nothing turned her on more than when her husband put her over his knee and flipped up her skirt, swatting her twice through the plain cotton boy-leg panties before dragging them down and spanking her properly.
“Jesus,” Connor muttered. “Where does she get this stuff?” He couldn’t get past the act of spanking. Maggie reflected on positions, implements and now lingerie. She’d posted about communication. Part of him wondered what she’d discuss next.
I feel a yearning for some lingerie shopping. Maybe I’ll see if my girlfriends are up for a spot of retail therapy. My current lingerie is plain, and I’m due for a spending spree. I like wearing sexy lingerie while at work. Dress for work is always conservative because management doesn’t want us to frighten off the customers. At least I can express my individuality with lingerie.
I’ve always wondered about a corset. Some of them are beautiful and can be worn as outerwear with a pair of trousers or a skirt or as lingerie.
What sort of lingerie do you think would work best with a spanking? I look forward to your comments.
Connor reread the end of her post about the corset, and an idea came to him.
The idea.
It was perfect and fed into her spanking fantasy. This time he’d meet the issue head-on because otherwise he risked losing Maggie to another man.
He felt so good about his idea he emailed her.
Dear Bad Ass,
Why don’t you ask your lover what sort of panties he’d prefer you to wear? Or better yet, why don’t you tell your lover what you want from him? Give him the option of saying no instead of taking the decision away without giving him a chance. Your lover might surprise you.
The worst that could happen is he’ll say no.
The truth is you’ll surprise him. You’ve had more time to consider spanking than him. He might not understand why you want him to spank you. He might not like the idea because his parents raised him to admire and protect women. Tell him what you think spanking will bring to your relationship, explain why you think spanking will improve things between you.
Give him reasons. Men are used to taking the facts and acting. When you spring this on him, your man will likely feel confused and want answers. He might wonder how a negative activity like spanking could improve a relationship. Have those answers ready for him.
Tell your man how you feel about him, and most of all exercise patience.
Best,
Kinky Lover
Connor checked his note and decided covered everything he wanted to learn. Hit the high points. If Maggie had ready answers, it might help him past the worry he’d physically hurt her.
His thoughts drifted to his father. He hadn’t seen him for years and then only during supervised visits. The last had been at age thirteen. A typical teenager, he’d gone sullen when his father had ordered him around. The visit hadn’t gone well, and they’d fought. The fight had escalated from verbal to physical. He’d landed a few punches and had broken his father’s arm before his father had overpowered him.
Not his finest hour.
And the potential for violence worried him. Connor had grown up that day and worked to control his temper every day.
He looked like his father. Same build. Same physical appearance. Same volatile temper. If he raised a hand to Maggie once, would it become easy? Would he strike out no matter what the provocation? Would he turn into a monster?
So far he’d never hit a woman in his life.
He prayed he could hold his shit together and keep it that way.