Her head pounded. That was all Cassandra knew as she opened her eyes. Then her mouth was dry, and finally, the room was too bright. Her eyes closed, pitching her back into heavenly darkness.

“Gabe?” a wave of nausea rose up in her throat when she turned, a strange tugging sensation happened around her elbow, but she couldn’t figure out why.

“Hey. I’m here. Let’s just lay still.” His voice was a gentle whisper.

“What’s going on?” Her eyes cracked open again. He came into focus, a little blurry, but mostly clear. His eyes were bloodshot, his hair tied back but with strands flying everywhere. “Did they already do the surgery?” She wouldn’t tell him now, but she found it sweet he was nervous enough to cry.

“Not quite. Damn doctor’s and their delays.”

“You’re lying to me, aren’t you?”

His bark of laughter was louder than her head could handle.

“I’m sorry. I am.”

She wanted to sit up, but her body held her down as if weights had been tied to her wrists and ankles while a literal ton sat on her chest. Something’s wrong. She choked, spittle landing on her hand as she coughed. “I’m sick.”

“That’s what they say.” His voice was hoarse. “It was a lot more than a damn sniffle.”

“How am I in this room?”

“I made a withdrawal from the apartment I’d been in. Seemed the perfect use of funds to keep you safe.”

“Gabe, do you know anything?”

He gave a sharp shake of his head. “Not family, they wouldn’t tell me anything. Pretty sure the only reason they’ve let me sit here the past nine hours was because I look like I could take them all down before they got any sedative in me.” He cracked a smile, but it didn’t reach his green eyes.

Nine hours. “I’m not okay.” It wasn’t a question that time. A tremor in her lip nearly brought about a round of tears. “Guess I’ll be looking for a boob job from my new room at this rate.”

“Stop it.” Gabe’s words were deadly cold. “This isn’t a joke. Don’t make them.” He was quiet for a moment, his eyes looking past her. “Are you happy with your life? Even as short as it was, are you happy with the life you’ve lived? The life you have right this very minute?”

Cassandra opened her mouth to answer him, but no sound came out save for a strangled cry. He was asking because she was going to die. Doctor Dresdell had been wrong, there was no break coming for her.

Tell him what he needs to hear. “It wasn’t always my favorite, but yes.” Queasiness forced her to take short, shallow breaths.

“Don’t lie. Not about this.”

The expression on his face nearly ripped her apart. Keep lying. The thought was vivid in her mind, but she couldn’t do it. “No.” She closed her eyes, and the tears finally began. They felt cold, which she knew from crying quite a lot the past few months, was not normal. Swallowing, she tried again to sit up and failed. “There are so many children all over the world who will have to wait a little longer to get the family they long for.” She opened her eyes and looked across the room at him. “How could I ever be happy about that?”

“So dying?”

“Would suck. I have so much more I wanted to do. But am I happy right now?” She reached out and was glad when he put his hand in hers. “Absolutely. You came into my life when I thought the answer was to shut everyone out. You pushed your way in and made me fall me in love with you. I could never be anything but happy about that.”

He said nothing, just stared at her. His eyes were an angry swirl of golden streaks that seemed to completely cover of the green.

A knock on the door ended their conversation. A sigh of relief eeked out. She wasn’t ready to have more of the discussion, not right now.

“So glad to see you’re awake.” Judy walked in, concern etched into every feature of her face. Her voice was gentle, softer than usual.

A man she did not know walked in a moment later and closed the door with a quiet click.

“This is Doctor Hythe. He’s been your doctor since you were brought in earlier this morning. He’s taken good care of you, and I’m grateful for that.” Her voice slipped, sorrow bleeding out. “But I’m afraid we’ve hit a bump in the road.”

“I’m dying.”

“We are not saying that. You are sick—pneumonia. I’m not sure why you were out in the cold, but you obviously were, and now we’re going to fix you up. That will have to come before we can operate. We need your body as healthy as possible. So,” Judy clasped her hands together. “You’ll be staying with us for a few days. There will be a lot of fluids and antibiotics. A whole lot of mandated rest and then we’ll go ahead with the surgery as planned.”

“People with cancer, when they get pneumonia. . .”

“It can be severe, yes. Which is why you’ll be staying here. We’re going to make sure you’re right as rain so we can heal you. I know it’s scary to hear, and probably hard to believe, but you need to keep fighting for me. For you.”

She tried to nod, but her head simply felt too heavy. “I won’t.” She meant the words, even as she lay there feeling like everything was over. Even after Gabe had made her answer the most challenging question of her entire existence. She’d been so intent on living and not hiding, she may have killed herself.

“Good.” It was Doctor Hythe who spoke. “We’ve already got you hooked up to the antibiotics. I’m going to need you to do your best to eat over the next few days. This is going to be a very rough patch, and you’ll likely sleep a lot, but we’re going to get you through this.”

He was the second doctor in as many minutes to try to convince her of that, so it must be true.

“Thank you.” A yawn escaped her, and she wondered how it was possible she was tired from nothing more than lying still and talking for a handful of minutes.

“We’ll let you rest.” Judy turned away but spoke to Gabe. “She needed someone like you. I don’t know how you were fortunate enough to find each other, but don’t leave her now.”

“I’m not a normal man, I won’t run because it’s getting rough.” He looked at her, love shining out of his eyes now that the strange glowing gold had settled.

“That’s exactly what she needs to hear.”

Both doctors are left, leaving her and Gabe staring silently at each other.

“I love you, Cassandra.”

“I love you too. I’m so sorry for all of this.”

He was up, the chair cracking against the wall. When he closed his hands around hers, she felt a little better, and she knew why.

“Gabe, no. It could be dangerous.”

He snarled, and the warm sensation that always occurred when he healed her vanished.

“I want to help. You’re in a hospital, and they’re monitoring you. If something goes wrong, they’ll know.”

He was still trying to be her Guardian. Even staring at the face of her possible death, he refused to be anything but the man he was when they met.

“Gabe, promise me something.”

“I’ll consider it.”

“If I die, if something does go wrong, take your father up on his offer.”

He snarled. “We’ve already discussed this.”

“And I’m rediscussing it.” Do it. Pain, like a knife to her heart, sliced through her at what she had just decided to do. “Actually, I think you should go now. You can be reassigned to another, and I will fight this knowing I had the most amazing support system to ever live.”

“You’re not serious.” He let go of her hand. “You did not just say that to me!” His shout boomed in the small room.

“I am. Go, Gabe. You’ve done so much for me. I won’t let you give up everything when it looks like the end is coming.”

“The end is not coming. You’re sick, caught a damn cold because I let you talk me into going out to see the damn stars last week.”

“And they were beautiful.” Her lip quivered. “And they’ll be beautiful the next time I see them. I will see them again because knowing you’ll watch over me gives me something to fight for.”

“Stop lying to me.” He snarled and paced back and forth. “Don’t do it, Cass.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Just don’t.”

“I just want you to have a life.”

“My life is right there.” His hand shook as he jerked it at the chair. “Right there in that chair until after your surgery and then it’s wherever you are.”

“I don’t deserve you.”

“And I don’t deserve you, but we have each other.”

“We do.” She bit her lip, wanting to do the right thing but not able to push him away. Not when she was so afraid to fight on her own. “I don’t want to be a bad person.”

“For loving me? For letting me love you?” He finally stilled next to her bed and squatted down. “There isn’t an ounce of bad you in, Cassandra Marks. I can promise you of that.” He touched her fingertips to her chin. “Now, can we forget this happened, and you get some more rest.”

“Think you could fit your big, muscular body into this bed with me?”

He laughed softly. “Probably not, but if you can manage to safely roll onto your side, I’ll get into bed even if only an inch of me fits.”

Sucking in a breath, Cassandra tried to roll and winced as she did. The tug from the damn IV ripped at her skin, but she ignored the pain.

“There now.” The bed dipped down, and his arm draped over her. “Get some rest. We have a fight ahead of us, and I for one, want to make sure we win.”

Closing her eyes, she cuddled against him and said a little thank you to whoever sent him to her in the first place.

Her breathing patterns changed almost immediately, and Gabe was grateful she was asleep. She needed to rest to recover if she wouldn’t let him help in any way. She’s being foolish. The thought left a nasty taste in his mouth.

Now was not the time to be angry with her for her bravery. Cassandra was fighting to survive, and he needed to respect her wishes if he respected her at all. Looking at her, the damn hospital gown slipping off her shoulder, he fought off a wave of anger.

He hadn’t been wrong, she deserved to live for so many reasons—not one of which was because he loved her. That was simply the personal reason why he wanted her to live. She did not deserve to waste away at a young age, lying in a hospital bed and praying for a cure that would never come, because the angels did not give it lightly.

“Because you’re hypocrites,” Gabe growled out. “You could save so many, but you hide behind the guise that people are meant to play out their lives on a certain course, and only a select few should be saved.” His words boomed in the small room. He clamped his mouth shut, not wanting to disturb her while she slept.

“If you care so much, instead of your battle wings, would you take your Guardian Wings back? Work to save another life the way you’ve tried to with her?” Carlyle’s voice was low, but he had appeared on the other side of Cassandra, standing with his arms crossed over his chest. “It is what she wanted. We just heard as much.”

“Did my father send you?” Gabe moved from the bed, doing his best to be careful and not disturb her. “Did he tell you offering me the chance to save humans in another fashion might bring me home?”

“I am here alone, on my own.”

That surprised him, stopping him from his snarky remark. “Why?”

“This,” he gestured at the bed, “was never going to succeed. You were warned from the beginning, and still, you persisted. Your reasons were less than noble when you began, but when it became about her and not you, all I could see was what a wonderful Guardian Angel you truly were.”

“Falling to protect a charge makes me great?”

“The most powerful Guardian Angels have all given up their wings to protect their charges. Some from dangerous relationships, others because like you, they’d fallen in love. Your father wants you home, wants you impervious to anything save for angel weapons. Gabriel demanded the council save her after you left. Still, he was denied. I know if you accept your wings back, he will happily break the rules to gift them to you.”

“I have no intention of turning my father into that which he hates.”

“He would do it, for you.”

“Then he must understand why I will not take them back. My place is here, by her side. Even the doctors are hopeful this damn infection will pass.”

“And if they save her? Will you return to your place if she can live?”

His heart ached. If he had to leave Cass for this bargain to work, it would be worth it. You should be able to give her up.

“Do not make promises that you cannot keep.” His father was there, making the room ridiculously cramped until he folded up his wings.

“So you would not save her then?”

“I would not. Carlyle is not incorrect. I want my only son home, but a Guardian Angel will always experience loss. You are not cut out for that. I see that first hand. I offered you your battle wings because I thought it was not only what you wanted, but what you were best suited for.”

A storm crackled inside of him, thunder booming and lightning crashing down in his ears as his father chastised him. “That is the last time you will ever put me down. The great Archangel Gabriel is not the best father—and I am done being punished for not being everything you want me to be.”

Electricity danced over his fingertips, and he gasped. That was not a gift he should have, as it had belonged to Battle Angels only. The brewing storm unleashed a bolt of lightning shooting forth where it should not have.

Shock rolled through him. “I do not want these wings!” They unfurled with his thought, a gleaming gold he saw reflected in the small mirror in the room. “When?”

“When you slept last night. I eased your discomfort and left you to think nothing had changed.”

“That is why I saw her aura, but only briefly.”

“Yes.”

“Take. Them. Back.” He stepped closer, finally abandoning his place at Cassandra’s side.

“She will die, Son. Sooner or later, she will die.”

“It will be later.”

“And if it is not?”

“Even if she dies, I don’t want my wings any longer. I might have failed once as a Battle Angel, but you have all failed Cassandra. There is no place amongst you for me.” The electricity dancing on his hands stopped, not because his wings were taken, but because his words nullified his anger with his fear. “That woman lying there is greater than the sum of so many people. She faces an uncertain period in her life and do you know who she looked out for? Me.” Grief wrapped around him and his wings folded up as he collapsed to the floor.

“Gabriel?” Carlyle spoke, but he did not move closer.

“She thought of me. When her world seemed to be ending, whether it truly will or won’t, she thought to protect me. To tell me to find another soul to save and to get my wings back. She thought of me. Not herself.” Tears had become all too common, but he’d never experienced them as an angel, and they still had so much power of him. His entire body shuddered as he cried, practically lying on the hospital room floor.

The sound of wings drew his head up. His lip curled back into a snarl. “That’s it? You’re just going to leave after giving me something I don’t want?”

“There are arrangements to be made. There is nothing left for me to do here.”

His snarl was feral, almost demon like. “Go then. Get out.”

And they did.

No sound continued, save for the steady beeping of one of the monitors. He had his wings back - the wings he’d always wanted—and all he wanted was for her to wake up cancer free.