CHAPTER 7
SAM
AN HOUR LATER, Fiona and I were partying on the couch—and by partying I meant watching The Family Stone while I ate saltines and drank mint tea and she nursed a glass of whisky. Apparently, the mint tea was supposed to ease my stomach.
Claire and Rory were asleep, and the house was strangely quiet.
The MacLeods’ living room was formal with a classic but comfortable style, and a big Chesterfield-style couch in the middle of the room faced the fireplace. It was evident that the room had been decorated some time ago, and the only recent addition was the flat-screen TV on top of the fireplace.
I was feeling slightly better, although the big what-if weighed heavily on my chest. I took a deep breath, hoping that would help me get rid of the feeling of uneasiness, but it didn’t work.
The uncertainty and the suspense were killing me.
What if I really am pregnant?
How had it happened? We’d just started our life together; it was too soon. It was going to complicate things so much. My head started spinning, and I knew right then that I needed my husband.
I needed Hugh. I needed to talk to him.
Whenever there was turmoil, whenever life threw curveballs at us, he was the only one who could make me feel grounded.
He was the only one who could make everything better.
I didn’t know how I felt about the possibility of being pregnant. After a bit of back and forth, I decided I wanted to wait for him to take the test.
I took a sip of the tea, appreciating the scent and the taste of it.
There was no doubt that my mother-in-law knew everything there was to know when it came to childbearing. When I really thought about it, I still couldn’t believe she’d survived raising five boys without losing her mind.
We both laughed out loud as we watched Rachel McAdams slip all over the spilled casserole in the Stones’ kitchen, and we both teared up as the family opened presents.
Fiona grabbed a Kleenex for herself and then handed me one.
“I love this movie. It’s so underrated,” I said, drying my tears.
A few minutes later, the MacLeod boys made it through the door, led by their father. Tamhas and Fergus were laughing about something, and Fergus was patting his brother playfully on the back.
A nervous sigh escaped my lips as Hugh’s piercing blue eyes locked with mine.
My heart went into overdrive, thumping against my ribcage as if I’d just run a marathon. I got up and waited for him to reach me, standing still, wringing my hands like a heroine in a Jane Austen novel.
He was right in front of me in no time, his eyes full of unspoken questions. He took me in his arms and brushed a strand of hair away before cupping my cheek with his hand.
I leaned into it, relishing the feeling of his touch, and covered his hand with mine.
I sighed, suddenly feeling better just with his presence.
Maybe it was stupid to be worried. We’ll be okay, won’t we?
“How are you feeling?” he asked in a low, worried tone.
“A little better, but I need to talk to you about something.”
HUGH
“COME.” She took my hand and led me to the room we shared as questions I hadn’t asked yet ran through my mind.
Was she really sick? Was it something else?
Could Sam be… . . . pregnant?
I’d said months ago that I didn’t want to be an old dad, but I’d have been lying if I’d said I wasn’t surprised. She was on birth control; I thought that was enough.
“Sam, what’s going on? Have you figured out why you’re feeling off?”
She closed the door behind her.
“Yes and no.”
“What do you mean?”
She took a deep breath, wringing her hands together.
“Hugh, I think I might be pregnant.”
I breathed out a laugh. I’d thought of it myself, but her saying the words made it all more . . . real.
“You think . . . or you know? And how did it happen with you being on birth control?” I asked, cocking one eyebrow.
“Well, I was talking to your mother, and . . . remember when I had pneumonia last month and I had to take antibiotics? Apparently, the doctor failed to mention that the antibiotics would make birth control ineffective . . . and I had no clue that was the case—silly me.”
I held her around her shoulders and searched her eyes for an answer.
“Sam, are you pregnant?”
She looked up at me, eyes full of worry, as if that could ever be bad news. “I don’t know,” she cried as she pressed her face against my chest and wrapped her arms around my waist.
Laughter bubbled up in my throat and I hugged her to me tighter. The feeling of sheer joy coursing through me was a welcome surprise. My heart started racing inside my chest, impatient to know the truth.
A child. Our child.
The thought alone had me smiling from ear to ear, and a surprised laugh escaped my lips.
“It’s not funny,” Sam mumbled.
“You don’t sound too happy, but can you tell me what’s so bad about it? So what if you’re pregnant?” I asked her in a low, reassuring tone, caressing her head. Her hair always smelled so heavenly, and her hair felt silky under my touch.
She sighed and then, in a broken voice, said, “It’s too soon. I wanted to . . . plan it.”
“Can you ever plan something like this, though? Do you think my parents planned to have five children? It just happened. When can we find out for sure? Do we need to go buy a test? I’ll go get one right now if you want me to, no matter how far I need to go to find a store open.”
Sam disentangled herself from my arms and walked past me. She opened the drawer of the nightstand to pull something out.
“Here,” she said, placing the box in my hand. “I didn’t want to do it without you.”
Her eyes darted from mine to the box impatiently. All she needed was a bit of reassurance.
I pulled her into my arms, hugging her tight to my chest.
“I love you, Sam. Nothing is ever going to change that, you know it, but whether it’s right now or in one year or even five, I can’t wait for the day we’ll have a child of our own. I know my heart is going to burst with love and pride for a wee bairn that is the sum of the two of us.”
“It’s not really having a child I’m worried about, it’s everything else. What about us? Remember our friend Margaret? She had to quit her job after she had her little girl.”
“Well, yes, but Margaret’s circumstances were different. Posy was born early and we were in the middle of production. But you, Samhain…you’re not going to be alone in any of this.”
“I don’t know, Hugh . . . how am I going to balance work and motherhood?”
“You mean how are we going to balance it. You’re not alone, Sam. We’re a team, aren’t we?” I tipped her chin up so she would look at me. Her eyes were glossy with tears, and her lips stretched in a trembling, uneasy smile. “Besides, you know how all these Hollywood actresses take their bairns to the set with them? Well, what about the fathers? Why shouldn’t the fathers also take the kids along? You and I work together already so we can use that to our advantage, and there’s one more thing, lass.”
She seemed comforted by my words. Her eyes were hopeful when she asked, “What is it?”
“I can’t wait to see how beautiful you’ll look with life—with our child—growing inside of you,” I whispered against her lips, placing a hand over her belly.
We didn’t even know if she was pregnant, but my heart was already bursting with joy. I didn’t know how much more it could swell in my chest.
What was it going to feel like when I held my child in my arms?
Sam raised herself on her tiptoes and placed a long, soft kiss on my lips.
She smiled at me when she pulled back. Making her feel safe and loved was always going to be my number one priority.
“Hugh?”
“Yes, Sam?”
“I’m ready. Let’s find out if we’re going to be parents.”