Chapter8
Hazel
“Hey, Rach. Thanks so much for doing this on such short notice. I really appreciate it and I know Ben is happy,” Hazel said as she dropped off Ben with Rachel. Willow came rushing out.
“Hazel!” she exclaimed. Hazel bent down and enveloped her in a huge hug.
“I’m giving you Ben for the night. You two must play nicely together, okay?”
“Yes!”
And before they could finish their conversation Ben had taken her hand and the two of them had walked off together. It was incredibly cute and as Hazel watched them go, she smiled.
“Those two! They’re adorable. I wonder when they’ll get to the stage where they hate each other? That stage always comes eventually.”
“Or the stage where they start liking each other? That is normally followed by the ‘I hate you’ stage.”
“Yeah, little do they know but their moms have already planned their entire wedding.”
“Yeah. They have no choice. They will marry each other so that we can become family. There really is just no other option for them,” Rachel said and laughed. “So… are you sure you are doing the right thing?”
Hazel sighed. “Nope. I’m not sure at all. But I’m not seeing this as a date. I’m seeing this as an opportunity to create a friendship with Ben’s father. I do want him to be a part of Ben’s life and being friends with him will certainly make the whole thing a lot easier. Honestly, it’s nothing more than that.”
Hazel squirmed under her friends glare. “Hmm… well, it sounds like a date to me. Speaking of which, you never told me how your date went with Travis the other night. I’m assuming not so well considering you’re going out with Damien tonight.”
“Oh yeah, I’m sorry. I meant to call you but things just got a little crazy. Uh… it went well. I mean, we had a great time. He’s a good guy and we got on well. We actually had a lovely evening. And he took me for sushi. He asked his daughter what I liked to eat and she told him sushi. I thought that was really cute.”
“But…?” Rachel said. It was obvious there was a big ‘but’ hanging at the end of that sentence.
“But I just didn’t feel anything. The moment the date ended I knew that I didn’t want it to go any further than friendship. And I am big on following what my gut tells me. I honestly didn’t see a future between us and I figured there was no point in pursuing it. He was really nice about it.”
“Yeah, but be honest with me now – how much of that had to do with the fact that Damien is back in your life? I mean, if he was still in jail, do you think you would’ve gone on another date?”
“Honestly? Yeah, I probably would’ve. I most likely would have at least tried another date to see where things went. I know that maybe I’m being stupid here. But I’m just following my heart. I still don’t want a relationship with Damien – I mean, I just can’t – not after everything that happened. But I don’t just want to get into a relationship with someone else to spite him either. I don’t know, Rach – I have a lot to figure out. I’m just going to be honest with myself throughout it all. It’s the best I can do.”
“I agree, Haze. Just follow your heart. But follow your head, too. And if you don’t know what to do – call me. I might not have all the answers but you know we work well as a team. Also, I can always just provide you bottles of wine and boxes of pizza. There’s nothing quite like an alcohol induced carb splurge to get your mind off things.”
That made Hazel smile. “Thanks, Rach. We should do that regardless of how I’m feeling.”
“Agreed. It’s way overdue. Well, be careful Hazel. But have a good time, too. You deserve it. And if you need me to come and fetch you just call me. Love you lots.”
“I love you, too, Rachel. Thank you again.”
Hazel got home and saw that she had two hours before Damien arrived. The first thing that she did was pour a steaming hot bubble bath for herself. Bubble baths had always served as the best way for her to fully relax. And she desperately needed to relax at that moment. Afterwards she spent some time trying to decide what to wear. She’d always been quite casual and she didn’t want this to look too much like a date.
So she pulled on some tight black jeans and then paired it with an emerald vest, some black boots and a small black jacket. She looked in the mirror and tried to imagine how he would see her. It was difficult. She had never understood what someone like Damien saw in her. She seemed so average. And yet, he looked at her in a way that no man had ever looked at her before. She tied up her hair into a high ponytail and allowed a few strands to fall down in front. Then she applied just the hint of makeup and she was done. Now, she just had to wait.
Damien was ten minutes early. She was grateful because she didn’t want to think anymore and she was so close to either changing her outfit or simply canceling the whole thing. She kept telling herself that it wasn’t a date even though he had clearly asked her out on one and she had agreed.
“Hey, Damien.” She tried desperately to sound as casual as possible but she wasn’t sure if she was pulling it off.
“Wow. Hazel, you look beautiful.” Damien looked at her and smiled in a way that made her immediately self-conscious in all the right ways.
“Thank you.”
Damien reached forward and kissed her on the cheek. Hazel immediately felt the warmth rush to her face and she quickly turned away to close the door so that he wouldn’t see. She assumed that they would be walking somewhere so she was surprised when he led her to a shiny red Volvo.
“Nice wheels,” she said, assessing the car. She immediately became suspicious as to where he had gotten it from and then felt bad when he replied.
“From my brother. He said I simply couldn’t take you on a date without a car. We’re actually going around the corner so it wasn’t very necessary but it was so nice of him that I couldn’t say no. I think he was horrified that I was going to expect you to walk.”
Hazel laughed. “I would’ve walked. But that’s nice of him. And it is a pretty cool car.”
“Yeah, I had to agree even though, of course, I knew you would walk. He said I could keep it for a few days to get around. As it turns out my brother is a really nice guy.”
“I’m glad to hear it Damien. I’m sure he’s happy to have you back in his life.”
“He is. So am I.” And Hazel could hear that he meant every word of it.
“So where are we going?” she asked.
“Well, I know you love sushi but we’ve been to all the sushi restaurants around. And I thought it would be nice to try somewhere new. I mean, somewhere where we haven’t been before. Start afresh. You’ve probably been but I discovered the coolest little restaurant the other day and I just had to take you. It’s called Dine and Art. Heard of it?”
Hazel grinned. She’d wanted to go ever since it opened a few months ago. Of course, other than her date with Travis recently, she didn’t actually go out all that much and she hadn’t wanted to go alone.
“Yeah, I’ve heard of it. I’ve never been but I’ve been desperate to give it a go.”
She was glad to see how happy he was at that. And he was right, she liked it the moment she stepped inside. Dine and Art was an initiative by one of the local schools and featured artwork by kids from all over the country.
The menu was small but because it had been created by one of the top chefs in the city a lot of care and attention had gone into each dish. So far Hazel had heard only good reviews and it was one of the most talked about places at her school. She was hoping that her school would be able to get involved in the near future and she knew that her kids would love to have their artwork displayed. She walked in and took some time admiring the pictures – amazed at how talented some of the kids were. The place, despite the kids drawing all over the walls, still somehow managed to look sophisticated. The waiter led them to their table, which was situated right at the back against the wall and was slightly separate from the rest. Hazel wondered if Damien had specifically chosen this table as it seemed a little more romantic than the others – but she couldn’t be sure and she didn’t want to ask.
“Welcome to Dine and Art. My name is Johnny and I’ll be your waiter for the evening. Could I interest either one of you in a glass of wine? We have a beautiful Merlot that we are very proud of. Otherwise I can bring you the drinks menu.”
“Merlot sounds good to me,” Hazel said and Damien agreed. Merlot actually sounded amazing at that moment. She barely drank now because she was always around Ben so it was a good feeling when she got the chance to just relax.
The waiter came back and handed them each a glass with a generous amount of wine in each and then asked if they were ready to order.
“Oh no, we haven’t even looked at the menu.”
“That’s okay. Most of the time people take ages to order because they are too busy looking at the art. It’s fascinating isn’t it? I wish I had been able to draw as well as them when I was younger. Although, having said that, I can’t even draw that well now. Anyway, you two just take your time – there is absolutely no rush. I’ll come back in a while and take your order.”
“Cheers. To drinking wine.”
“To talented kids.”
“To restaurants that don’t feel the need to rush you.”
“To bacon.”
“To beer.”
“Ah to hell with it, I’m going right in,” and with that Hazel took a big sip and grinned, “To a waiter that definitely knows his stuff.”
“It’s good to be here with you, Hazel.”
“It’s good to be here with you too. Although, Damien, I don’t want to think of this as a date. I’m just putting it out there now. I don’t know what the hell this is to be honest. But I’m not prepared to give the two of us another try. You know how badly I got hurt in the past. Then I got hurt a second time with you. I just can’t go through that all again. And I know you’ll say that you won’t hurt me – but you said that all before. And I’m starting to think that people just don’t keep their promises. So… I don’t know what we’re doing here. But it’s not a date. I am, however, happy to be here.” Hazel hadn’t meant all of that to come flying out of her mouth. “Uh… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean any of that in a bad way.”
She looked up and thankfully Damien was smiling at her.
“That’s okay. I’m not expecting anything. Trust me, Hazel, this is more than I could’ve even hoped for. I’m just happy to be here with you and I’m not going to think any more of it.”
Hazel could do nothing but smile. That was all she wanted. She took another grateful sip of her wine.
“So,” Damien continued, “how are your family doing? You know, other than hating my guts. Sorry… I’m just joking… if there is one thing I haven’t lost it’s my sense of humor.”
Hazel laughed. “Well, you’re not joking – because they really do hate you. But they are doing well. I still see them most Sundays for lunch. Mostly because it saves me from cooking. But it’s also always great to see them. Shaun and Emma are getting so big now and they are obviously completely in love with their cousin. They love that there is someone even younger in the family then them now. Whenever we go there they become Ben’s parents and I have no say on anything. It’s quite nice actually and very sweet.”
“Well, I’m not sure if it means anything, but I really liked your family. And up until that point when I left I was actually having a wonderful time. Speaking of family – I met my brother’s wife and his kids. Very briefly but they promised to invite me over soon. I’m an idiot, Hazel – I missed out on so much of his life.”
“Admitting to being an idiot is the first step.”
“Cheeky bugger.”
The waiter came over and asked if they were ready to order. Hazel started laughing.
“Oh no! We still haven’t looked. Uh… can you recommend anything?”
“Actually, we have weekly specials made by the kids themselves. Well, the food is not made by them – thank goodness – but they came up with the concept. And tonight we have none other than spaghetti and meatballs. Fine dining at its best.”
“Two of those then, please!”
When the waiter left Hazel suddenly realized that she had just ordered for Damien. “Oh no. I’m so sorry. I’m so used to ordering for Ben. Do you want me to call the waiter? You can order something else.”
“That’s okay, this menu looks a bit daunting to me right now and, in fact – spaghetti sounds wonderful.”
They continued talking easily and Hazel was amazed at how quickly they had slipped into their old ways. Every now and again, she would remember that he had left her and gone to jail and she would feel sad. Then she would suddenly forget and it would feel as if he had never left. Her emotions were so completely up and down. When the food arrived she realized that they had not stopped talking since they had ordered.
“Oh dear,” she said as she took a big mouthful, “this is certainly not the most romantic meal that we could’ve ordered.”
The bowl had a generous serving of spaghetti, topped with meatballs and a lot of tomato sauce. Within seconds she already had sauce on her top and she noticed that Damien had some on his arm.
“Well, it’s lucky that we’re not on a date then.”
“Cheeky sod.”
And it was nice. Just the two of them like that. Eating messy food, drinking wine and laughing together. She was surprised that she was able to laugh with him so much. She had been angry at him for two years and now she was just happy to have him around. She felt confused by her feelings especially because she was so scared of being hurt again. She knew that her mother would be upset to know that she had even gone on a date with him again – and yes, she knew that it was a date. In fact, she hadn’t even told her parents about him being released even though she knew that she would have to tell them soon. She owed it to them to be honest about it all.
They paid their bills and made their way back to the car and Damien took her home. She was almost sad that the restaurant was so close to her home because it would mean that the evening would be over even sooner. When they arrived he got out and opened the door for her and then walked her to her front door. She knew that she wasn’t going to invite him inside, even if she really wanted to. Even with her emotions all over the place and the few glasses of wine that were now sloshing around inside of her, she knew that she had to be on guard.
“Well, Damien, thank you for a lovely evening. I really had a good time.”
“I had a wonderful time, Hazel. Oh there’s a bit of tomato sauce in your hair. How the heck did it end up there?” He reached over and smudged it off. That made her giggle.
“Well, I better go inside. Thank you again.”
She wasn’t sure if she should hug him but thankfully she didn’t have to think about it too long as Damien reached over to kiss her on the cheek. But as he did so she felt herself move her face quickly so that his lips ended up on his. She didn’t pull away and she felt her entire body shiver as he parted her mouth with his tongue. The kiss was slow and gentle. It was perfect. She quickly opened her eyes and realized what she was doing.
“Uh… I better go.” She opened the door and quickly closed it behind her. Then she fell to the ground and waited until she was steady enough to walk again.