“That stupid woman!” I slammed my fists against the wall until I went straight through the sheetrock, revealing the cave wall beneath. It had been a long time since I’d seen it, as we had updated and renovated the cave as soon as the opportunity had presented itself.

“I resent your use of that word,” Tamhas growled.

“Fine,” I growled in return. “That foolish woman. That troublesome woman. Is that better?”

“You know it isn’t.”

“And you know she was wrong to run away like that!” I punched the wall once again, knowing I would certainly regret the damage once I was no longer angry. Then again, it would likely be a long time before my anger dissipated.

“Throwing a tantrum helps no one, especially Keira.” Ainsley placed a well-meaning hand on my shoulder, but I shrugged her off. The last thing I needed was her comfort when all she seemed prepared to do was undermine me.

“How dare you?” I snarled.

She fell back a step.

My rage wouldn’t be controlled. “A tantrum? Do not forget who you’re talking to.”

“I know exactly who I’m talking to, brother.”

“No.” I faced her straight-on, staring into those eyes that looked just like mine. “You are speaking to the leader of your clan. I am not your twin at the moment. You would do well to remember it.” I turned and went straight to the communication center, though I wasn’t certain why. It seemed like the most logical place to disappear.

I should have known better, as my sister and her mate and that stupid, thoughtless woman’s mate followed me. It was difficult for me to think about Tamhas as anything but, as he was so thoughtless in his support of her.

Too many questions, too many courses of action, yet they insisted upon following and thus making it impossible for me to think.

“Do you plan to find her?” Tamhas demanded.

“No, I plan to do no such thing.”

“How can you say that?” he shouted.

“You realize we’ll simply go without you, do you not?” Ainsley stood beside him. I couldn’t believe she would take his side over mine, over the clan’s. She refused to see this for what it truly was. They all did.

“Have you all forgotten? Have you?” I pointed to Klaus. “I do not expect him to understand, and I would not expect Keira to, gods know. But you ought to. For a thousand years, we have done all that was within our power to protect ourselves and each other. How can you be so selfish?”

“It is not a matter of being selfish. You speak of protection?” Tamhas asked. “What about protecting what is ours?”

“Keira is not ours!”

“She is mine! You know what that means to us! Simply because you’ve never known it yourself—”

“Don’t.” Ainsley stepped between us, facing him. “Do not say such things. You cannot take them back.”

The two of us stood there, glaring at each other. He was correct, naturally. I had no mate and had never come close to having one. And I understood all too well what it meant when one of us found the one person we were meant to be with for eternity.

Concerns such as one’s clan, the wishes of the leader, seemed to take second place.

Even so, I could not simply allow him to forget everyone and everything else in favor of what he wanted.

“Our history with the Priestesses is far too fraught.” I managed to keep myself somewhat in check, much to my own surprise. A leader did not allow emotion to take them as far as I already had allowed myself to go. I needed to be smarter.

As Gavin would have. I’d never seen him get into screaming matches.

He took a deep breath, let it out slowly. “I realize that. I remember it well.”

“It is my job to make these difficult decisions,” I reminded him. “It gives me no pleasure to do and say these things. I do not wish to hold you back or keep you from that which is so important to you.”

“Important?” he gasped, then laughed. “This is much more than simply important. This is critical. This is everything.” He held his hands to his head. “This is my dragon screaming, nonstop, demanding I find our mate and find her now. Do you understand what that is like? It’s torture, is what it is. The very fact that I’m standing here with you right now rather than going out there to find her is torture.”

“If the Priestesses were to find her, they would not harm her.” I looked from him to my sister, then to Klaus. “We know this. She is one of them.”

“There is a good chance they’ll never allow her to leave,” Ainsley murmured. “Once they have her back with them, they’ll tell her who she is and how powerful she could become, and they will not release her.”

“What if this has nothing to do with the Priestesses at all?” I asked. “What if it’s nothing more than a case of someone becoming lost in the woods? Why did we assume this had to do with the coven at all?”

“You were the one who was so certain it had to do with the coven. You dared any of us to claim you were wrong,” Klaus reminded me. He at least managed to look apologetic about raking me over the coals as he was.

“You’re right. I did that,” I admitted. “Thank you for reminding me.” The last thing I wanted to do was thank him.

“And perhaps it doesn’t have to do with the Priestesses. All the more reason for us to help Keira find her friend. She won’t come back without her. You know she won’t.”

“Aye. I suppose I know her well enough by now to know that.” Stubborn, she was. And strong. “At least we know she’ll be able to take care of herself if she comes across any threats.”

Ainsley winced. “While I consider myself quite the fierce fighter, even I can admit that just because she managed to outfight me doesn’t mean she could face down an animal.”

Tamhas shuddered.

“You know, there’s a good chance she’ll come back on her own. What if she finds nothing of Emelie out there?”

“She will not give up,” Tamhas whispered. His fists were clenched tight at his sides. “She will not.”

I believed that.

“Give me a bit of time to think this over. Please.” I looked at all of them. “I understand how important this is. I truly do. But going off half-cocked, not giving any thought to what we should do next? That is a sure recipe for disaster. We must give thought to how we move forward, or else we might make mistakes.”

It did not please him, that much was certain, but Tamhas relented. “Fine. Take a bit of time, but it cannot be much. I will go on my own if need be.”

“I know you will. I give you my word that I will be quick about it.”

The four of us left the room, allowing Owen to return to his customary place in front of our security feed. Before leaving him alone, I turned to him. “Keep a close watch on the perimeter. I’ll want to know if anyone goes into or comes out of the woods. Including any of us.”

“Understood.” For once, someone wasn’t arguing with my instructions. What a refreshing turn of events.

I escaped to my room, my sanctuary. The one area of our caves where I might be able to have a little privacy. Since Gavin’s death, it was rare that I got a moment to myself unless I locked the rest of the clan outside my door.

Before I did anything else, I splashed my face with cold water from the bathroom tap. It normally helped center me better than even flying could.

The face reflected in the mirror looked like mine in many ways, but not in all. I rarely looked so haunted. So angry and resentful.

Why did everything have to be so complicated? Did Gavin struggle this way? If he had, he’d done a good job of keeping it from us.

He’d been good at keeping secrets, too. At shielding the clan from that which he felt we did not need to be involved in. By doing that, he’d made the difficult decisions without bringing dissenting voices into the mix.

I wanted to be that type of leader, but it seemed increasingly impossible. Every challenge which came my way made keeping certain information quiet, away from those who did not strictly need to be involved. Tamhas and Keira would have shared the news of Emelie’s arrival and the fact that she was missing with everyone, whether I’d wanted them to or not.

Would that I might be able to return to a simpler time.

It wasn’t as though I wished to lie. I merely wished to manage the flow of information a bit more efficiently. Was that such a terrible thing?

And yet…

“If you told them the truth, they would understand.” I stared at myself, unwilling to break eye contact with my own reflection. “If they knew what you knew, they would know why you’re reluctant to go through with this.”

But they did not know, because Gavin had only told me of the true reason for the rift with the Priestesses.

That was the reason why I’d jumped to the conclusion of their involvement.

Why I distrusted them so intensely.

Why I questioned whether they’d had anything to do with our being invaded.

No matter, though, because a leader did not allow those he led to walk headlong into danger without doing everything he could to ensure things did not take a turn for the worst.

I didn’t agree that we ought to look for either Emelie or Keira, but I didn’t believe they ought to go without me.

They were waiting in the common room for me, all of the fun of the day having long since been crushed into silence. The television was no longer on, no more games. Nothing more than a group of people seated around the place, everyone looking either forlorn or frustrated.

Tamhas’s head snapped up the moment I entered.

“All right,” I shrugged. “We had better get started on a plan.”