Chapter 23
Judy
The gravelly sound of my shoe sliding against concrete alerted Garrett that he wasn't alone. Garrett turned defensively as if expecting that it was a fan among the workers looking for a selfie, or an autograph with him. The expression on his face when he saw me melted his hesitance.
“Judy?” he asked carefully, as he walked around the large free-standing beer vendor kiosk toward me.
Did he actually recognize me, or was he just hopeful? I was pretty bundled up. A tuft of my hair poked out the front of my fleece-lined hood, and my eyes were showing, but other than that I could've been anyone.
God, I felt horrible. I was just stopping to rest against the kiosk when I heard the talking. Then I didn't want to be caught eavesdropping, so I stayed quiet.
My stomach turned and I felt light headed. Stopping was a bad idea. I should've just run to my car. Now, I worried that I was too weak to drive.
It was freezing out. With the wind chill, it had to be ten-below-zero.
If it was so cold, then why was I sweating?
“Jesus, are you alright?” He asked when he reached me. He frowned, taking in the sight of me.
Did I look that bad?
The argument with Aaron Miller, his reputation, the fate of the town. All of that was brushed aside, there was only concern in his blue eyes. Concern and fear.
I was exhausted. Mascara streaked down my paler-than-normal face. It must've been easy to see that I was crying.
He touched my cheek, intent on rubbing the tears and black streaks away but they were all dried. His eyes narrowed when he saw my pain as if they asked angrily, who made her cry?
I was still so angry at him for what he did, then for leaving altogether, but my head was swimming so much that I didn't care. I didn't trust him. I wasn't sure I even liked him, but part of me was always glad to see him. He exuded an aura of protection. I felt weirdly safer when he was around.
“Are those for me?” I asked, reaching for the beautiful long-stemmed white lilacs. I tried to remember the last time I'd received a gift like that. They smelled nice.
Had anyone ever given me flowers before?
Doug certainly never did. He barely even remembered my birthdays.
How fucking sad was that?
Garrett slipped a hand into my hood, then touched my forehead. “You're burning up. I'm taking you to a hospital.”
Garrett swept me up with ease, cradling me and my bag. He took the stairs in twos and threes, as he rushed me out to the parking lot. I felt like a little girl, who fell asleep in the car, and was being carried to bed. I was out of it and scared about so many things, but being in his arms made me feel like I was going to be alright.
I loved that feeling. I teared up again. After these last few weeks, I needed this more than I could describe.
I was going to be alright.
“Garrett?” His name tumbled from my lips. I didn't know why I said it. It just felt good to say. It was reassuring. I hate you, but I'm glad you're back.
“Don't worry, dance partner,” his softly accented voice warmed parts deep down inside of me I didn't know were cold. He kissed me gently on the forehead as he helped me into the car. “I'll take care of you.”
*****
I gasped awake, sweating and disoriented.
Where was I?
The room's lights were low, but as my eyes adjusted I could quickly tell I was in a hospital bed. There weren't any clocks, but the windows in my room were dark. It must be late, or early. I couldn't tell which.
What happened to me?
Slowly the memories came back to me. I was at work and I felt awful, then that terrible man came into my office. Then... That's when it started to get fuzzy. I was outside.
What was I doing?
Garrett was there! That's right. I was listening to him argue with the new investor. I shivered, remembering now what they talked about. Aaron Miller never wanted to help us, that twisted asshole.
There was something else? Thinking straight was hard. My brain was oatmeal mush from whatever happened to me. It was like trying to remember the world through a kaleidoscope.
I threw up in an empty office, but before all of that...
I shot up in bed. Holy shit. The pregnancy test!
“You're awake,” Garrett grumbled from a nearby chair. The deep baritone of his voice told me that he'd been asleep for some time as well.
Had he stayed here with me?
“Did they say...” I paused to collect my thoughts. “What did the doctors say?”
He stood up, stretched his hulking form and rubbed his eyes.
“You'd think with how cliché it is for someone to sleep in a bedside chair at a hospital, they'd at least make them more comfortable.” He yawned, checked his watch, and then sat back down. “It was a fever. Doctor says you'll be fine.”
My heart slid back down my throat. I sank into the bed. “What time is it?”
“Almost four.”
“Please tell me you weren't here the whole time.” I looked over at him.
Garrett looked lived in. He wasn't disheveled by any means, but he didn't have his usual crispness about him. His suit jacket was draped around the back of his chair, but his silk button-down was wrinkled and bunched in places. A pant leg was even rolled up to the mid-calf.
Who was I to talk?
I was in a hospital gown. My hair and makeup was a wreck, and I felt like a bag of garbage left out in the sun on a summer day.
“Of course not.” He smoothed out the wrinkles in his suit and rubbed a hand through his hair. Then he looked up and smirked. “I tucked Jackie into bed a while back.”
God, he even made unkempt look sexy.
“They just let you stay here? They only allow family to stay overnight here. What did you tell them? Because no one in their right mind would buy that were siblings. How did you even—” I felt myself get spun up and slowed down. Talking was exhausting.
“They tried to stop me, but I can be pretty persuasive.” Garrett's self-satisfied smirk fell away. “I called your father, but he wouldn't answer. Probably because he's still angry with me. I couldn't let you wake up alone. How are you feeling?”
“I've been better. Is there any water?” My throat was sandpaper and steel wool.
“The doctor insists on just ice until your nausea subsides.” Garrett leaned forward in his chair and gave me a sympathetic look that crushed my soul. He was there, he saw and understood. His eyes, told me that I would be alright...
“Thanks.” I tried to force the grogginess from my head, but it was slow going. “For getting me to the hospital. I shouldn't have stopped where I did.”
Garrett sighed; his lips became a thin line across his face. “How much of the argument between Aaron Miller and me did you hear?”
“Enough to know that he wants to destroy you and is willing to bankrupt us in the process.”
“You should tell your father and the rest of the city council. The stadium isn't finished yet, they should still have the power to end Miller's contract. ”
“He won’t listen to me.” I sank a little lower. I've always been a nuisance to him. Each job he's given me has always been just to keep me out of trouble. “Dogs will fly the day he takes business advice from me. Besides, Aaron has gone out of his way to keep the mayor, and the rest of city council, satisfied.
“That evil sonofabitch knows exactly what he's doing.” Garrett's eyes narrowed. Anyone could see that he really hated Aaron. “I don't know how yet, but I'm going to fix this, Judy. I promise.”
“Stop it,” I said finally. My heart was going to give out if he kept looking at me like that. Between the pregnancy test and everyone losing their jobs, I was too overwhelmed with everything to deal with all the emotions he stirred within me.
“Stop what?”
“Stop being so damn charming and compassionate. I can't handle it!” I hated how hard it was to read him. To really know him. I'd seen so many different sides of Garrett over the course of knowing him that I didn't know what was real anymore. “You're a tornado, Garrett. You're this big, beautiful display of awe-inspiring power. You land in my life, turn everything upside down, and then leave.”
“And I'm left to just pick up the smashed ruined remains.”
“I'm sorry for how it ended last time,” he frowned.
“An apology and some flowers? That's not good enough.” I pushed myself up into a sitting position on my bed. The weakness and haziness in me started to dissipate. All the conflicting emotions swirled in my head and heart like a witch's brew. “You abandoned Caldwell Hope when it needed you most.”
When I needed you most.
“And now...” I continued. “We have something so much worse.”
We sat there in silence. Garrett ran things over in his mind. I guess we both did, because neither of us talked for a few minutes. I wish I hadn't been so direct and harsh to him, but it was how I felt. I couldn't stop it from coming out the way it did.
“You're right.” Garrett stood up and grabbed his coat. “I've gotten really good at running away from my problems. Words aren't going to make this right. I don't expect you to believe me when I tell you that this time I'm serious; that I came back for you and that I'm never going to leave you again.”
“Garrett, wait. I—” I blurted, then abruptly caught myself. I desperately wanted to believe him, but how could I?
I hadn't even heard from him in weeks.
He paused and looked at me, patiently waiting to hear what I was going to say next.
Should I tell him I could be pregnant with his child? What if the test was a false positive? What if... I couldn't physically keep the baby. It was hideous to think about, but it happened before and it destroyed my relationship with Doug.
The thought of getting an abortion made me extremely depressed. I loved kids and always wanted one or two of my own. But what if my body just couldn't have children? Wouldn't an abortion be more humane than a miscarriage?
Everything frightened me, but the thought of giving up the slightest chance at a family, terrified me. I shivered. There was no way; I had to at least try.
I’d never felt more lost and alone.
Looking into Garrett's piercing blue eyes didn't help at all. I didn't know what I had with Garrett, but for as angry as I was at him, I was terrified at the thought of him being out of my life forever. I chickened out and instead asked, “Where are you going?”
“I'm going to let actions show you the kind of man I am.” Garrett charged out of the room, like a white knight off to fight a dragon.
Oh, Garrett... The cavalry rode over the hill too late this time. There's nothing you can do.
I pressed the button to summon the nurse. A few minutes later a thin, tired-looking male nurse arrived with a clipboard and asked me how I was feeling.
“I think I'm alright. Or, at least, I'm getting there.” I managed a weak smile at the nurse. It was all I could do to keep from crying. “Can you send the doctor in when she's free? I... I think I might be pregnant and I want to discuss options.”