The next morning came, or at least I thought it was morning. I could only try to determine the time of day by my energy levels from when I felt tired and when I woke up after I had rested. I yearned for windows, daylight, vegetation, even birds singing to greet me like they used to back home.

I awoke drained of any energy. What I wouldn’t give to be in my own bed, in my own home, snuggled in my own pajamas and far away from this nightmare I found myself reliving every morning. I just wanted my life back.

Turning over in hopes to get more sleep, I was startled to find Julian still sitting in the wooden chair. Did he leave? Or did he stay in my room with me all night, watching me, peeking into my dreams? I was sure they flooded his mind as they had my own all night.

I slowly pushed myself up into a sitting position, watching him warily. I was trying so hard not to think of anything, to not allow him to read any more of my thoughts. Part of me knew it was pointless, it wasn’t like I had a special shield to protect me from him. I certainly didn’t have any special powers to combat his own. I was an open book to him. Always. But my mind reeled with discomfort, curiosity, and questions. I just wanted peace of mind.

Julian appeared distressed himself. Like something was bothering him as much as it bothered me.

Unlikely.

His woes were nothing to me. Not after everything he had put me through. I secretly hoped he was suffering in his own self-pity. Maybe then he would realize how distraught this all made me.

He gazed at me, his eyes darker than usual.

“What are you doing here?” I asked. I wanted to try and trust him, but how could I trust someone who always had access to my mind?

Leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees, Julian locked his gaze on me. “You judge yourself too harshly. If not for your mind, you would have never made it out of that bathroom alive.”

I gulped, feeling the hand of death on my shoulder.

“You surprise me. You fascinate me. Can’t you take some comfort in that?”

“That’s easy for you to say. Whenever I do something of interest to you, you can dip into my head and figure me out. I can’t do the same.”

He gave a long sigh. “Abigale, I am going to offer you something in hopes of easing your mind. I know how much distress it causes you, knowing I can hear your every thought. Reading thoughts is as normal to me as breathing is to you, but I know that this is something mortals find difficult to comprehend.” He interlaced his fingers, mindlessly kneading his knuckles as he thought over his next words.

“I am going to offer to you a chance to know what I’m thinking.”

His words knocked the air out of my lungs. Did that mean he was going to do something to me? Alter my anatomy to be able to hear his mind the way he could hear mine? Like superpowers? Though it terrified me to be altered in any way, the idea of knowing things the way he did intrigued me.

Julian’s gaze shifted into a glare. “No, Abby. I am not going to give you any superpowers,” he mocked. “Which is not even physically possible for me to do. I’m a different species, not a magically animated corpse.”

Arrogant bastard.

“Do you want to hear what I have to say, or keep insulting me?”

Damn it. I did it again. “Sorry,” I mumbled and thumbed the hem of the negligée I was wearing, cursing myself in silence.

“Now, as I was saying.” He raised a cautionary brow to me and sat back in his chair. “You may ask me what I am thinking at any time, and I will tell you honestly what my thoughts are at the time of the question.”

His words hung in the air. I wasn’t getting supernatural powers, but I would be allowed to ask him and get an actual answer in return. To me, that was as good as having a power. All I had to do was voice my questions.

“How will I know that you’re telling the truth?”

“You won’t.”

I furrowed my brows. “Then how do I trust that it’s true?”

“I guess that will be for you to decide.”

There was the catch, of course. I could ask him what he was thinking whenever I wanted, but I had to decide on if he was telling me the truth or not.

“So does that mean you’ll lie about what you’re thinking if you don't feel like saying what was really on your mind?”

“No. I will not lie. But again, that is your choice to trust in my word or not. That is the best I can offer you.”

Trust. The one thing I lacked the most when it came to him. But I had to try. I would get nowhere if I didn’t. I’d remain imprisoned here forever if I couldn’t put a little trust in him. Maybe this was the best place to start.

“Can I ask you what you’re thinking right now?” I whispered, my fingers still nervously twirling the sheer fabric around one another. I wasn’t sure I was ready to hear what he was thinking just yet, but I had to know something. Anything.

His darkened eyes fell on me, challenging me on whether I really wanted to know.

His lips twitched. He was suppressing a smile.

“I am thinking that you will refuse to obey my commands.” His gaze pierced mine with such intensity my lungs refused to accept oxygen. “Which would mean I would be left with no option but to discipline you. And I will admit, the idea of having such opportunity gets me rather… excited.”

Chills rippled down my body. “W-what do you mean when you say ‘excited’?” My voice trembled. It terrified me to know what he really meant, but I found myself growing excited at what the possibilities would entail.

He leaned forward, his face darkening with a needy desire. “The thought of punishing you arouses me sexually.” His husky voice made me tremble. I shouldn’t have felt this way towards his threats, but knowing that I excited him in such a manner had my own excitement stirring.

Julian’s voice had lowered into a deep growl. “Stand,” he ordered. “And remove all of your clothes.”

His demand rattled me. My eyes felt like they would bulge right out of their sockets. “No!” I spat. What kind of ridiculous game was he playing at?!

Julian slowly pushed himself up from the chair and his shoulders squared in an intimidating stance as he towered above me. What was he doing?!

I shrank back into the bed, scooting back until I was trapped against the headboard.

“I said, remove your clothes,” he growled as he slowly inched closer.

The look in his eyes gave way to a dark desire, something he was longing for, but I was nowhere near ready for that and I wasn’t going to be forced this way.

“You promised you wouldn’t rape me! The first night you had me here, you said you wouldn’t do that!” I pleaded, though I didn’t know what use it would be. If he wanted to take advantage of me, it wouldn’t take much. He was far stronger then I could ever be.

“I never said I wouldn’t rape you. I said based on your taste in literature, it seemed you hoped I would.”

My heart sank. My voice trembled. “A-Are you going to rape me?”

His eyes bored into mine as he stood inches from me. “No.”

I let out a shaky breath. The tension in my chest had eased off, but didn’t leave. Something I usually felt when I was let down. Was I really feeling disappointed?!

“Abigale.” The deep huskiness of Julian’s voice made me tremble. I found myself wanting him and hating him all at the same time. What was he doing to me?!

“I will only tell you this once more. Stand and remove your clothes.”

“W-Why?” It was the only question I could muster.

“Because, from what I know of you, it is unlikely you will obey me. This will give me a reason to punish you.”

There it was. All of the chips were laid out in front of me. I could either do as he demanded and chance what damning possibilities came from following his orders, or I could deny them and suffer an equally harsh punishment. Either way, I would lose.

As intrigued as part of me was by wanting to see what could possibly happen if I did just follow his orders, I couldn’t make myself cave. My arms wouldn’t move when I tried to take off my clothes. I needed to have some sort of control over myself, and my decisions were my last leg to lean on. Everything else had been stripped from me. My dignity, my integrity. Even my sanity. All were gone. My free will was the last thing I had left. I needed to hold onto one part of me that I knew, one part of me that no one else could control.

I brusquely shook my head. “No.” I stood my ground, my voice no higher than a whisper.

Wrong answer.

Without warning, his hand clamped around my wrist, and in one swift motion, he drug me to my feet.

“What are you doing?!” Panic was washing over me. Julian’s movements were harsher then he had ever been before. He handled me roughly, dragging me along behind him as he approached the large wardrobe. He flung the doors open, making them slam against its wooden sides. The banging of wood against wood rang out loudly. It was so hard I was shocked they didn’t shatter into a million splinters. He grabbed a large, solid wooden paddle. The long, rectangular head stretched out from the leather bound handle, thick and threatening.

My heart hammered against my ribs. I was already regretting my decision. Looking at the thickness of the wooden paddle, I knew this could break me.

“Julian!” I screeched as he flung me over the bed, forcing my body to bend over the edge as he pushed my head into the mattress. He grasped the side of my thong, and in one swift motion, ripped it from my body completely, causing a friction burn to bite at my flesh. He gently rubbed the cool wood across my ass cheeks and down across my warm mound. He was taunting me. But I knew this was going to end with me in pain.

Before I could protest any longer, sharp stinging pain blistered out across my bare ass, I screamed and tried to squirm out of his grip, but he was far too strong.

Again, the thick, cool wood collided with my bare flesh. Over and over again, he brought it down onto my bottom with such force I thought my skin had certainly burst open from the thrashing it was receiving.

“Please!” I screeched as I sobbed into the mattress, my fingers desperately clawing at the fluffy pillow top in an attempt to free myself as he abused my aching flesh.

Again and again, the paddle would meet my backside, each swat stinging more so than the last.

“Please, stop! Please!” I begged between heaving sobs, but to no avail.

If anything, the swats became harder, rougher then the last. Beating my flaming hot flesh with no regard to my agony.

After what felt like decades had passed, Julian finally stopped. My retching sobs echoed through the silence that now filled the room.

He dropped the paddle and released me from his iron grip, letting my body sink into a sobbing pile on the floor. I watched him as he strode off towards the door.

“Where are you going?” I whimpered as pain coursed through every inch of my body.

He turned to me, clearly flustered. Maybe he had felt bad about what he had just done to me. Could vampires harbor sympathy? Remorse?

“I don’t intend to rape you,” he stated as he turned back to the door, “but our interactions has gotten me rather aroused.”

No sympathy. No remorse. He was only aroused.

At first I couldn’t see how beating a woman would arouse anyone. Even the idea of it repulsed me. But as I looked at it from his perspective, having a half-naked woman, ass bared towards you, tempting you as you watch them squirm beneath you… I could see how the only thing you would want to do is take advantage of that situation. The desire to penetrate their waiting heat tempting you with every move.

Though pain still coursed through me, I found myself somewhat aroused. I couldn't help but think of what it would be like for Julian to take me, fully, in every way imaginable. I began to ache in another way. A way only a man could ease.

I shook the ridiculous thoughts from my mind. What was happening to me? I was torn, conflicted between losing myself and dark desire.

I needed rest. A fresh outlook on what I had found myself stuck in. I needed release. But moving in the slightest was a feat.

Wincing against the pain, I crawled into the barren bed and curled onto my side, hoping to find a comfortable position to sleep in and let my aching backside heal.

Lying there, my mind constantly wondered back to Julian and what he might be doing.

What did he intend to do to fix his arousal? Would he simply sit there, masturbating to our rough encounter? To me? Or would he find another woman to satisfy him? How many other women did he have hidden in this house to use and abuse as he pleased? How many of them yearned for him to take them? Would he be gentle with them, like a lover would? Or hot and rough like they were nothing but a toy?

As hard as I tried to force those impending thoughts away, they plagued me even as I drifted off to sleep. The worst of them all was wondering what it would be like for him to take me in whichever way he deemed fit.