Chapter 14
Sada woke up on the couch and looked around. She’d come out here last night, furious with Zahir after another night of…of horrible lovemaking. Yes, she’d had several orgasms. Yes, he’d been kind and tender. But Zahir wasn’t like that! She didn’t want him to be like that! She wanted what they’d shared before. She wanted passion.
And if she couldn’t have that, she didn’t want any of it.
She stepped into the shower. She had no plan today. Unlike yesterday when she’d been excited about what was coming, today she had nothing on her agenda.
Nothing other than confronting Ms. Lotz, Sada thought with a sigh.
Dressing in a white suit and pulling her hair up into a sophisticated twist, she patted down her skirt, determined to take charge of her life.
Her first stop, the kitchen. “Good morning,” she announced as she stepped into the noisy area.
The chef turned warily towards her, an apology on his features. “Your Highness…”
Sada sliced the air in front of her. “Don’t!” she snapped. “The food you’ve served the last few nights has been mediocre. Boring. If you cannot follow my instructions and come up with something more interesting, you will be replaced. Do I make myself clear?” she demanded, glaring at the man. She was losing her patience with the man. She’d stated her preferences clearly and he had still listened to Ms. Lotz.
The chef stammered for a long moment, shaking his head. “But, Your Highness…”
“No! No buts! No excuses! Follow my orders or be replaced! I expect to see you in my office at noon today, not just with a new, creative menu for the following week, but with samples of the foods you are suggesting.” She waited a heartbeat, staring hard at the man. “Noon!”
Sada didn’t wait for an answer. She turned and stomped out of the kitchen.
Her next stop, the human resources department.
As soon as she stepped into Fred’s office, the man stood up. “Your Highness…”
Once again, she wasn’t going to deal with his excuses. “No, Fred. I’ve explained my requirements and you have failed to send me resumes that match them, even given multiple chances. I read through the resumes you gave me during our last visit and chose several candidates, but to date, I have yet to see an interview on my calendar. You have until eleven o’clock today to find me suitable resumes. If you don’t find me ten different candidates, then I will go outside of the palace to find someone. I have resources in Altair who can and will find me good candidates. So, if you don’t want your authority usurped, then get me some candidates!”
Without waiting for a response, she turned and walked out of his office.
Two down. One to go, she thought.
Walking down the hallway, she made her way to Zahir’s office.
“Is he available?” she asked of his assistant who stood outside of her husband’s office.
The man was clearly flustered. “He is very busy today, Your Highness.”
Sada shook her head. “I didn’t ask what his schedule was like. I asked if he was available at this particular moment.”
When he continued to flounder, she shook her head. “Never mind,” and she stepped towards the doorway. The guards took one look at her and moved out of the way, allowing her entry to Zahir’s office.
Sada stepped through the door only to come to a stop when she saw Ms. Lotz standing in front of her husband’s desk.
“She’s breaking protocol and disrupting the process that was established twenty years ago,” the woman stated clearly.
Sada must have made a sound, because they both turned and looked at her.
“How dare you!” Sada hissed, stalking further into the room. She wasn’t aware she’d left the door hanging open. “You’ve undermined me at every turn! You’ve contradicted my orders. You’ve insulted me when talking to the staff, and you’ve attempted to make me look like a fool at every opportunity! I know that I can’t fire you, Ms. Lotz. However, you are no longer in charge of the household staff. I will determine the menus for my meals, I will select the candidates that are appropriate for my staff, and I will set my own schedule. You may not go behind my back and contradict my requests to the palace staff. You will not belittle my attempts to establish a personal staff to help me set my agenda and support my husband, and you will certainly not call the servants away when they are supposed to be assisting me. Have I made myself clear?”
The woman actually turned to Zahir, looking for support. “Your Highness, do I need to say anything more?” she said to Zahir.
Zahir glanced from the smug Ms. Lotz to his outraged wife. “I believe you’ve explained your position perfectly,” he said flatly.
Ms. Lotz turned back to Sada with a triumphant smile, folding her hands in front of her.
Sada cringed inwardly, thinking that this was the end. She would be humiliated in front of Zahir. She should have kept her mouth shut and fought her battles away from Zahir’s office. The man didn’t have time to deal with the petty issues within the household staff. He had the security of the whole country on his shoulders!
“You’re fired,” he announced.
Ms. Lotz’s smile widened, but when she glanced at Zahir, she realized that he was looking at her. Her mouth fell open, then she looked at Sada. Then back at Zahir. “You…what?” she screeched. “You’re taking her side?”
Zahir crossed his arms over his chest, glaring at the woman. “Apparently, you have been maligning my wife in front of her staff and making her life more difficult. Your role in the palace is to serve the royal family. To make our lives run smoothly so we can deal with matters of state. We’re here to run the government, Ms. Lotz. If you’ve been contradicting my wife’s orders, then she’s unable to help me run the government.”
“But…she’s your wife! She should be…”
“My wife,” he emphasized the title, “is instrumental in helping me rule, Ms. Lotz. If you’re undermining her, then you are an enemy of the state. My wife’s authority doesn’t come from me. It comes from her position within the government. She will not be undermined. Leave the palace immediately.”
The woman didn’t go down easily. “I’ve served the Ditara royal family for decades,” she spat. “You can’t just throw me out!”
“I just did. Guards!” The door to his office burst open, and his security team rushed in.
“Ms. Lotz is no longer an employee of the Ditara government. Since she is not a citizen, she needs to be escorted from the palace and put on the first plane leaving the country. Her personal belongings will be packed up and shipped to an address of her choosing.”
The guards didn’t hesitate. The screeching woman was carried out of Zahir’s office.
When the door closed behind her, the resulting silence was almost deafening.
Sada turned to glance at Zahir, but when she realized that he was by her side, she cringed away, her anger returning in full force.
“Thank you for that!” she said and stepped back. He looked so incredibly handsome and he had just backed her up.
Unfortunately, her success seemed to feed on itself. The next words tumbled out before she could think it through. “I don’t want you to touch me.”
Zahir stared at her, stunned. “I beg your pardon?”
Probably the wrong approach, she thought. The stunned look quickly morphed into anger and she backed up a step. But she wouldn’t back down! This was too important!
“The passion is gone, Zahir! The way you touch me lately makes me feel horrible! It’s like…like I’m a china doll that you take out and play with, carefully. It’s clear you don’t love me. But I love you, and I have loved you for years! Every time you came to visit me, every dinner, I felt as if I was on top of the world simply because you were with me. Just one look from you would send shivers throughout my whole body.” She took a deep breath, staring at his chin. “I loved the way you touched me when we were first married. There was so much passion! But over the past few weeks, the passion just hasn’t been there. It’s been…awful!” She growled in frustration as the tears she’d fought all morning won the battle. She swiped at them angrily but they continued to fall.
She couldn’t look at him any longer. Turning away, she took a deep breath. “You don’t love me. I understand that and was willing to deal with that because when you touched me, it was as if you couldn’t help yourself. You seemed to be just as out of control as I felt. You’d rip my clothes off, which was surprisingly sexy. You’d make love to me as if you felt something for me.” More tears and she backed up, furious with herself and with him. “But now, the passion is gone! I know you don’t love me, Zahir.” She stopped, her hands wiping away the tears. “And I thought I could love you enough for both of us. But I can’t. I can’t deal with the cold, mechanical way that you touch me now. I just…I can’t!” She ran from the office, hurrying down the hallway, unconcerned with where she was going just so long as she was away from him. She didn’t care how many people saw her tearful departure.
All Sada cared about was getting as far away from Zahir as fast as she could. Yes, she’d have to figure out how to get along with him during their marriage. And yes, she would give him children, but right now, she was thinking artificial insemination was the way to go.
But rational thought was gone. She raced through the hallways, not towards their apartment because she couldn’t face that bed again. She found an empty room and dropped onto one of the sofas filled with pillows. Burying her face in the soft cushions, she sobbed out her anger and frustration. Yes, she might have won the battles with the chef and the human resources department. And tomorrow, she might even celebrate the firing of that horrible woman. But right now, all she wanted to do was grieve the loss of her hopes and dreams.
She cried until her throat hurt and, when there were no tears left, she let her body cry without the tears, her heartache silently wracking her body.
Spent by the wave of emotions, she huddled on the sofa, her head buried in the pillows.
Zahir ordered the human resources director to his office. “You ignored direct orders from my wife?” he demanded.
Fred stood there, not sure what to say. In the end, he nodded. “Yes. I followed Ms. Lotz orders instead of your wife’s,” he admitted. “But do I have resumes here. Seven candidates that are exactly what she’s looking for. I’ve already prescreened them, behind Ms. Lotz’s back, and know that several of them would suit her needs perfectly.”
Zahir stared at the man. He’d been about to fire him, but since the man had followed Sada’s instructions despite the old bat’s machinations, he would be spared. “I want those resumes on her desk in less than an hour.”
Fred stumbled. “Her desk?”
“Yes. I understand that she has an office area.”
Fred cringed, his eyes once again falling to the floor, unable to look at his ruler. “Um…I believe that Ms. Lotz ordered the maintenance personnel to take the furniture back to storage. Your wife’s office area is empty.”
Zahir kept his features blank. “Then I suggest that you rectify that situation. Fast!”
A moment later, the human resources director was gone, replaced by a trembling chef. “I know, Your Highness. I should be fired. I didn’t follow your wife’s repeated instructions. She came to me several times over the past few weeks, asking for menu options,” the chef explained, wringing his hands.
“Then get out!” he snapped, disgusted with the man’s sniveling. He called to his assistant and told the man that the sous chef was now in charge of the kitchens. His assistant nodded, writing down notes in his notebook that Zahir knew would be followed out immediately.
“Where is my wife?” he demanded.
The assistant looked at Zahir curiously. “She went to the south wing, Your Highness. I believe she is in one of the rarely used salons.”
Zahir found her fifteen minutes later, her guards dutifully standing outside of the doorway, watching for dangers.
He stepped through the doors, closing them quietly as he stared at her for a long moment. She was beautiful, he thought. Even with the blotchy skin and defeated slouch to her shoulders, she still looked beautiful. He remembered her impassioned words and hope soared. “You love me,” he stated, remembering those words with clarity.
Sada jumped and looked up at him with dead eyes. Those crystal blue eyes moved over his features and he could feel the caress, wanting to pull her into his arms. But he refrained, knowing what happened to him when he touched her.
Finally, she slowly nodded her head. “Yes. I’ve loved you for years.”
“Present tense?”
She didn’t answer. Just turned away.
He sighed, knowing that he’d have to admit all. “I’ve loved you since that day I showed up and you demanded that I fix your cat,” he told her.
Her shoulders tensed, and she half-turned.
“I love you, Sada,” he repeated.
“But…why…?”
“Why have I been holding back?”
“Yes,” she replied, sniffling slightly.
“Because I hurt you with the way I wanted you, Sada. I hurt your skin, left bruises on your legs and…”
“You didn’t hurt me.”
“Yes. I did. I left marks on you. I can’t let that happen.” He moved closer. “You don’t understand what I feel for you, Sada.”
“I was starting to,” she argued, turning fully around to face him. “The way you touched me gave me hope. I’ve loved you for so long. I thought you considered me my brother’s annoying little sister.”
He chuckled, but there was no amusement to that sound. “If you were only Tavon’s annoying sister, I would have taken you out for dinner that first time and never come back.”
She hesitated. “But you kept coming back,” she whispered, her eyes widening slightly.
“Exactly,” he told her, moving closer. “Even when I knew that I shouldn’t. I kept coming back. I had to see you. I only used your brother as an excuse.”
“Really?’ she asked, breathless now.
“Really. And I haven’t touched you the same way because…I feel too much for you. Everything I felt came out in my touch and I couldn’t hold back. Until the day I saw the red marks on your skin. Then I knew I had to get control of these feelings.”
“I loved it. I love you,” she told him, holding her breath and hoping he would tell her that he loved her again. She needed to hear those words again, needed this to be real.
“I love you Sada. With all of my heart and soul, I love you.”
She bit her lip and moved even closer. “Show me,” she begged. “You told me once how to show you what I wanted.” She placed a hand over his chest. “Show me how you feel.”
With a groan, he pulled her into his arms and kissed her. That’s when she felt it. All of his love was there in his kiss, in the way he held her so tightly, she could barely breathe. In the way he pulled her against him, his hands moving down her body to press her hips against his. And it was there, in the press of his erection against her stomach, in the almost desperate way he kissed her, held her and breathed her name when he kissed her again and again.
Too soon, he pulled back. But Sada noticed that he was just as out of breath as she was!
“And now I’m going to show you,” he announced, picking her up in his arms and carrying her down the long hallway. Sada wasn’t aware of the other servants who walked the hallways, stepping carefully out of Zahir’s way. All she knew was the pounding of her heart as he carried her into the privacy of their suite.
But they didn’t make it to their bedroom. He shouldered the door closed and, before her feet touched the floor, he had her pinned against the wall. Stepping back, he only took the time to grab hold of the top of her dress before he pulled, ripping the material away from her body. He didn’t even push the remnants off of her before ripping the satin of her underwear away. Kneeling down, he pulled one of her legs over his shoulder and spread her wide. Sada didn’t have time to catch her breath before he was sucking her bud into his mouth, making her scream. Her fingers dove into his hair as he quickly brought her right to the edge of a climax. But he didn’t let her go, holding her right there on the edge.
“Why…?” she gasped when he stopped but he wouldn’t let her finish that question because he stood up and lifted her into his arms. A shocked moment later, he impaled her on his shaft, lowering her down and then holding her while she adjusted to his invasion. But before she could become comfortable, he was lifting her up, thrusting into her again and again. It was so fast, so hard, and powerful, she was thrown into a climax so hard and intense, all she could do was hold on, wrapping her arms around his neck and sobbing as the waves of pleasure hit her fast. Hard.
When it was all over, after her body calmed and his own shuddered to his own release, only then did he pull out and cradle her gently in his arms. “Did I hurt you?”
She laughed, resting her forehead against his shoulder. “I don’t care,” she sighed. “Please do it all over again.”
He laughed, but he carried her into the bedroom, gently laying her on the bed. Only then did he strip off their clothes, then gently and thoroughly make love to her over and over again. When they were both too exhausted to move, he pulled her close, his hand moving back and forth over her shoulders and back.
“Tell me again,” he urged.
Sada smiled, feeling wonderful. “I love you,” she whispered.
“I love you too,” he said and squeezed her slightly.