Chapter Three
Rick smoothed back the strands of strawberry blonde hair from her face and watched her sleep. The physical and emotional release had pushed her right into slumber, and he enjoyed the soft expression on her face when her mind shut off and there were no more barriers.
In a few short hours, Tara Denton had wrecked his world.
He’d never been with a woman who gave him such an honest, open surrender. Sure, he liked to play, and enjoyed Dom/sub fun in the bedroom with willing partners. But he’d never felt so connected to another woman through physical intimacy. Not since Rebecca.
Her name skittered across his memory, but without the usual sharp pang. Her betrayal cost him big time. He’d stopped trusting and believing his partners, even in the bedroom, and that was a dangerous combination. Trust was implicit in a good relationship and he used to pride himself on his ability to sniff out a liar a mile away. He lost confidence in his own abilities, like Tara lost her trust. A wry grin crossed his lips. They made quite a pair.
He studied the scars marking her body. Rage simmered, but he clobbered it back, knowing the emotion useless. Amazing how she imagined herself to be ugly. She awed him with her strength. She endured, fought back, and survived. Each wound was a testament to her soul, and he appreciated every damn one, like a soldier overseas battling in a war.
Her eyes flew open.
He watched her thoughts flicker across her face as she realized where she was. He enjoyed the easy way she blushed, which was a total contradiction from her open response in the bedroom. The way she screamed as she came made him hard all over again.
“Hungry?”
She sat up, propped on the pillows, and peered at the plates of food on the bed. “Starved. Are we having a picnic?”
He smeared some creamy goat cheese on a cracker and fed it to her. She moaned at the taste, and right then, he was ready to rock and roll. “Just building up your energy for the rest of the night.”
A flicker of lust danced from her eyes. Yes, she was aroused at the idea of more play. He grinned and handed her a chilled glass of Pinot Grigio. “So, why don’t you tell me about yourself?”
She gave a hearty laugh. The pleasant sound caressed his ears with delight. “You probably read everything in Madame Eve’s report. There’s not much else to tell.”
The dry facts of the sheets given to all 1Night Stand participants barely scratched the surface. The black and white text told him her physical attributes, what she required in a one-night stand, and that she withstood a violent encounter she may or may not share with him. He craved so much more.
He wanted everything. Of course, he’d scare the crap out of her so he kept his tone light. “Oh, I don’t know. The report didn’t tell me how much you liked me to suck on your clit before thrusting my fingers inside you. It didn’t tell me your eyes are a thousand shades of blue and reveal every emotion, or that your breasts spill so perfectly in my hands.”
She blushed. “Okay, you win. What do you want to know?”
Evidently, she guarded her secrets well. “What do you do for work?”
Her muscles relaxed and she nibbled on some salted almonds. “I work for the local battered women’s shelter part time. They don’t have the funds to pay very well, so I supplement with a bookkeeping job. Jackson Castillo gave me a shot at his hotel, and now I’m working on my degree in accounting.”
The pride in her voice warmed his heart. Son of a bitch! So Jackson knew Tara personally all this time. How odd the man went along with Madame Eve’s request. He figured Jackson would’ve kept his buddy far away from his employees. “I bet you’re very good with numbers,” he said. “Numbers you can control. If you work hard enough, everything fits into place, with no surprises.”
Her eyes widened. Bingo. His little accountant needed a place in her life where she felt empowered. He bet she’d squeeze out every dime of profit for Castillo Resorts and admired Jackson for seeing the potential in her.
“You’re right. I never thought about it like that,” she murmured. “I was always really good in math and numbers.” Her voice drifted off as if she fought the memory of her past and she shook her head.
He wrestled with his instinct to push. God, he wanted to know every thought and every hurdle she’d gone through.
“Did you graduate high school?” he asked gently.
She smiled. “Oh, yes, with high honors. I loved school. I just never got to college because Tim wouldn’t let me.”
A dark cloud passed over him. “The one who hurt you?”
She seemed to struggle with her decision to share. Emotions shifted across her face, replaced with determination. She raised her gaze to his and looked him straight in the eye. “I don’t like to talk about him much, but I’d like to tell you the story. If you want to hear it.”
He grabbed her hand. Then squeezed. “Yes, baby. I do want to hear it.”
She took a deep breath. “I met him senior year in high school. At first he was the perfect boyfriend. Sweet, protective, caring. He took care of me. My father had taken off when I was young, and my mom wasn’t really around.” She crinkled her nose in distaste. “She had a series of boyfriends I liked to avoid, and I had no rules. No curfew, no need to show up at school. But I wanted to go to college, have a career, and be independent. I thought that’s what he wanted, too.”
He waited patiently as she paused. “Things began to change. He got controlling. Angry. Hated my friends, and refused to let me talk to other boys. He said he needed me to concentrate on him. His father beat him, so Tim moved out and wanted me to live with him. I agreed, thinking I could go to the local community college and we’d support one another.”
She swallowed. “I don’t know when I realized he changed. He flew into rages over things I did. I started getting nervous all the time, trying to do everything right. The first time he hit me, I was so shocked, but he cried and swore he’d kill himself if I left.”
Rick nodded with encouragement. He noticed she slipped into telling mode, her voice monotone. “I stayed. He began to beat me. My mother didn’t want me anymore since she was shacked up with her new boyfriend. I had no money, and Tim controlled everything in my life. I kept missing classes from the bruises, so I dropped out of college.”
“How long did you stay with him?”
“Three years. Two months. Five days.”
“How did you get away, sweetheart?”
She shuddered. “I collected change. Loose dollar bills when I knew he’d been drinking. I stashed the money in one of the tiles in the ceiling until I had enough. He always told me he’d kill me if I ever left. And I believed him. I had to be careful who I involved myself with because I didn’t want anyone else to get hurt.
“He worked at an auto shop days. He kept a close eye on me and I wasn’t allowed to leave the house when he worked his shift. But that day I did.”
She shut her eyes. He wondered what horrors she watched behind her closed lids, and his gut wrenched. “I cut off all my hair. Put on a knit cap and Tim’s clothes. Had a cab take me to the bus station. And I bought a ticket to the next town. And the next. And the next.”
His eyes widened. “You just kept traveling?”
She nodded. “I traveled for two days straight to throw him off. I walked into the first church I saw and begged to be sent to the nearest women’s shelter. This was back in California. I had a different name, but I’m not that person any longer. Tara Denton would never stay with a man who raised his hand. She’s successful and making her own way. And she’ll never be caught again.”
Her last words shot at him like cannon fire. Son-of-a-bitch. She has no plans to extend a relationship past tonight. A strange panic coursed through him at the idea of letting her walk away. But her intentions had always been clear. Only his had changed. Suddenly, he wanted much more than a one-night stand.
“Do you live in Vegas now?” He stroked her hair.
“Yes. I knew I’d have a new start here. Get lost. Find my own way.” A glimmer of a smile ghosted her lips. “I like the idea of a tarnished city being my home. I can paint myself up with makeup and glitter and clothes, but in the light of day, I always felt lacking. Tim used that to keep me a prisoner.”
“But not anymore.” Pride and admiration cut though him.
“Not ever again. Now, I can give back. I stopped being afraid he’d find me. Therapy helped. But I still wonder....”
“Wonder what?”
She looked embarrassed, almost shy. “How a man like you could want me.”
Her admission rocked him. “A man like me?”
“Yeah. Beautiful. There must have been a dozen women staring at you in the bar and wondering why you were taking me home.”
Anger sizzled so hot he wanted to beat his chest like a caveman and howl at the moon in frustration. He never thought twice about how women viewed him and felt damn lucky when a female wanted him back. But evidently she saw things differently. Her sense of feminine confidence had taken such a pounding, she didn’t see what he did.
Words wouldn’t help. Rarely did. But action would.
He studied her and wondered how hard he’d be able to push without causing her any painful memories. As a naturally dominant lover, he decided to trust his gut, and watch her carefully. Lust speared right to his cock as he envisioned the scene laid out in his mind.
“Tara, did you like watching us in the mirror?”
The change of topic surprised her. She flushed, but he gave her credit—she didn’t lie. “Yes.”
He forced her chin up when she tried to bow her head. “Don’t ever be afraid to say what you want or what turns you on. I loved how you snuck glances at the mirror and watched your body respond to mine. Do you know what my first thought was when I saw you sitting at the table?” She shook her head in obvious misery. “I couldn’t wait to fuck you.”
Disbelief shimmered over her face. “Really?”
He smiled. “Really. I wanted to rip off that bra and suck on your nipples. I couldn’t wait to see the look in your eyes when you came. And when you got up, all I could think of was getting my hands on your ass. In fact, I think that part of your anatomy has been sorely ignored tonight. Let’s change that now.”
Panic flared in misty blue depths. “No.”
He arched a brow. “Why not?”
“I have more scars on my back.” Her words were soft.
“Then I’d say they need my loving attention.” He plucked the wine glass from her fingers and put it on the bedside table along with the plates of snacks. “Lie on your stomach, baby.”
“No.”
He gazed back at her with implacable demand. “Do you want to please me tonight?” She nodded. “Then I’m asking you to trust me.”
He wouldn’t have blamed her for refusing. Instead, after a few moments, she slowly turned around and laid down on the bed. Her hands cushioned her head. Her breath came out in ragged gasps as she fought the sheer vulnerability of being naked with her secrets exposed. A deep joy and satisfaction speared his gut as he stared at the woman before him. Her pleasure came from submitting to her mate, no matter how scared she was. He swore she’d never regret giving him the chance to show her how precious she was. Her gift to him was priceless.
He took in the brutal wounds scattered over her back and ass. “What are these, sweetheart?” He pointed to the perfect circles marring her upper back.
“Cigarettes.”
“And these?” His fingers lightly traced the line of her spine and settled on the permanent welts on her buttocks.
“A whip. Sometimes a belt.”
He winced at the thought of the pain she endured under the asshole’s hands, but made his assessment as quickly and clinically as possible. If possible, her scars made him want her more, to replace the horror with memories of bliss.
“He was a sick bastard, Tara. But no one will ever hurt you again. Close your eyes and relax. Enjoy my touch.”
He moved his hands to her shoulders and began a slow massage. The stiff muscles under his fingers refused to yield, but after a few minutes, her body loosened. Her breath evened out, and her muscles relaxed with his touch. He spent a long time working her shoulders and upper back, enjoying the firm, white skin, and couldn’t help slip to the side to caress her ripe breasts. She uttered a low moan and arched upward to give him access. He slid his hands underneath and gently plucked at her nipples, circling his thumbs around the rigid peaks. With a final pinch, he returned to his main task.
He worked the indents along her spine and watched goose bumps pepper her flesh. When her body was completely under his control, he concentrated on the swell of her buttocks. He massaged the lush curves and kneed her legs apart, squeezing her inner thighs as he continued without pause.
Her musky scent greeted his nostrils. He grinned at the swollen cleft, her juices gleaming in the light. Damn, she was a responsive little thing. His cock grew to full length and pulsed with demand.
“You’re already wet for me, baby. Since you can’t see yourself, I’ll tell you what I see. A beautiful pink pussy, just begging for my fingers or my tongue. Your clit is hard but not enough. We can do better than that.”
She wiggled on the bed and he laughed low at her reaction to the verbal play. “But I really wish you could see this gorgeous ass of yours. All flushed and trembling. Arched high in the air, ready for my cock. But we have a long way to go.”
He separated the globes and blew his hot breath on the sensitive rosette between her cheeks. She bucked, but he held her down with a gentle firmness that told her she had no reason to run. He lowered his mouth and ran his tongue down the line of her ass, nibbling on the high curves as her arousal and the scent of strawberries mixed in the air. He opened her up wide and slid one finger across her slit. Her juices greeted him and he murmured his approval.
He settled his mouth over the plump, right cheek. Then sank his teeth into the quivering flesh as he plunged two digits into her channel.
She bucked and screamed. The orgasm took her hard and by surprise and he rubbed her clit back and forth, forcing her climax to extend for long, long moments. His erection throbbed with demand, and he quickly sheathed himself with a condom, rose up, and pushed his cock into her wet, tight heat.
He massaged her ass, pinching gently then moved up to play with her breasts. She trembled, not able to see where his fingers would touch her next, and satisfaction ripped through him. He drove in and out with a steady pace, and flicked the nub as it hardened and swelled again, poised for another orgasm.
“This is what you do to me, baby,” he said. “You’re beautiful inside and out, scars and all. My cock loves your juicy pussy, all tight and welcoming.”
“Please, Rick!”
He laughed as she arched her ass toward him, silently begging. “Not yet. You’re not getting off again until I’m positive you believe me.”
Sobs broke from her throat as he pulled out and flipped her over with one quick movement. He pushed up her knees and spread her legs wide. “Look up,” he commanded, then reunited them in a single thrust. Her dazed gaze rose to the mirror, the reflection of their naked, joined bodies in vivid detail. Her inner muscles immediately clenched. Yes, she enjoyed watching them. He made a note to play more with her visual senses.
He plumped her breasts and lowered his mouth to suck her nipples, tweaking the tips until they stood out, ruby red and glistening. “This is all for me,” he said, pointing to the mirror at her swollen peaks. Then he rose up and claimed her.
She cried out. He imagined the picture they made in the mirror as he varied short and hard thrusts until he found her G-spot. With a wicked grin, he pulled completely out and teased her clit with his finger, rubbing in tight circles, over and over.
“I can’t take anymore! Please, oh, please.”
“Your body is beautiful. Do you believe me now?”
“Yes!”
“Say it.”
“My body is beautiful!”
He drove in deep and hit her G-spot again.
“Ahh!” She screamed and her body convulsed around him. He kept up the pace and wrung every last ounce of pleasure from her then let himself go.
His climax shattered him. The release started from his toes and shuddered out of every pore. Her name broke from his lips, and he tucked her tight into his chest and held her.
***
The first weak ray of light struggled through the break in the blinds, reminding her that morning threatened. She pushed the thought away, and snuggled closer to her lover. Her body ached, but she relished her sore muscles. She’d never been so delightfully used.
Rick Steele shattered every illusion she ever believed. Her limitations with sex. The fear of her appearance. The confidence in her sexuality.
And about getting caught by another man.
Unease stirred her heart. She’d never felt more treasured or loved in her entire life. The way he touched her, spoke, and gave her satisfaction unlike anything she’d ever experienced before. Would she ever find another man in her life to match him?
“What are you thinking about?”
His low voice pulled her back into the moment. She smiled up at him, loving the golden arch of his brows, the rough slope to his jaw. She traced the curve of his lower lip and he bit down on the pad of her finger, his tongue darting out to taste. Her breath caught as her pussy clenched. He laughed, as if he knew.
“Why on earth would you ever need to book a one-night stand?” She caressed the stubble of his beard, loving the scratchiness against her fingers. “I’m sure women are begging you to take them on a daily basis.”
He laughed again and pressed a quick kiss on her lips. “Thanks, sweetheart. What a nice compliment.”
“No, tell me. Why did you do this?”
The humor eased, and she caught a glimpse of vulnerability shimmering in his green eyes. “I haven’t been with a woman in a long time.”
Her mouth popped open. “Get out.”
A ghost of a smile settled on his lips. “No, truth. I haven’t been with a woman for ten months now. My choice.”
She absorbed his perfect naked form. The man was a sex god and he’d been celibate for almost a year? Her mind whirled. “Why?”
“I used to live in Atlantic City. That’s where my family is from—I have two younger brothers, well, really four. Mom took in two of my best friends so I consider them my brothers also. Anyway, we all followed my father and make our living as dealers in casinos. First, my dad made us get a college degree before we were allowed to go to dealer school. In college, I met a girl, Rebecca, and we were together the whole four years. On graduation day, I asked her to marry me.”
Jealousy pierced her heart. She hated the idea of another woman being claimed by him. She locked the messy emotion away and concentrated on his story. “What happened?”
“We began planning a wedding. Moved in together. Then I came home from work early one day and found her in bed with one of my groomsman.” He gave a humorless laugh. “Talk about a cliché all the way around, huh? At least he wasn’t the best man.”
Horror filled her eyes as she imagined the scene. The betrayal he must have struggled with. Already in one night, she realized he gave his heart and soul without holding back. He’d demand the same of his partner.
A dozen condolences skittered through her mind. “Bitch,” she muttered.
His laugh held genuine humor. “Yeah, that about says it. Needless to say, things got pretty ugly. After a few months, I realized I couldn’t handle living there any longer. I needed a change. Jackson Castillo invited me out to Vegas, offered me a job, and I haven’t looked back.”
“That doesn’t explain why you stopped having sex.”
He shrugged. “When I first settled in Vegas, I went a bit crazy. Dated a lot, experimented with different women. Then my need fizzled out, and I only felt empty when I woke up in the morning. So, I took a break and concentrated on other stuff for a while. My hand has been my new best friend this past year.”
He waggled his eyebrow in a bad Groucho Marx imitation. She giggled. “Sounds like my vibrator. It almost caught on fire these past few months and broke from overuse.”
They laughed together. She stroked his chest, enjoying his crisp hair against her palm. “Do you still miss her?”
“No. Not anymore.” Suddenly, his gaze locked on hers, glittering with a fierce intensity. “I miss this.”
Joy broke through her at his words. Her heart pounded in confusion. What was he saying? Had he experienced the same strong connection she did? Did he want to continue when the night was over? Reality crashed around her. No. As much as she wanted more time with him, she had to stick to her plan. Work. Volunteer. College. She’d made herself a promise to never get involved with a man until she was completely whole. He’d given her a precious gift, but she couldn’t risk pushing herself. What if she was too fragile? What if he broke her heart? What if she became so enamored of him she gave up everything she was for a man?
She wasn’t ready. So, at dawn, though it would break her heart, she would leave him behind.
She pushed away the strangled grief at the idea and climbed on top of him. Surprise lit his eyes as she straddled his hips, her hair falling around his face to wrap him in a curtain as she kissed him. She gave him everything he asked for in that kiss: her surrender, her gratitude, her desire.
Her tongue swept in and she greedily tasted his dark, male hunger. When she lifted her head, her gaze burned into his with promise. “I’m doing this because I can’t stand the idea of not having your cock in my mouth.”
He tensed at her words. And then she slipped down his body, cupped his balls, and sank her mouth over his hard, throbbing length.
He groaned. Cursed. She took her time, enjoying the taste of his salty skin, licking to the tip and then swirling around in teasing circles. His muscles locked, and her nails dug into his hard thighs. Finally, she opened her mouth wide and sucked, rubbing and stroking the underside of his cock, scraping her finger nails over the sensitive flesh of his balls, while her name rang like music in her ears.
He stiffened and grabbed her shoulders. She knew he was about to explode, but she refused to move. His excitement blended and melded with hers, and her juices flowed as she rubbed herself against his leg like a cat in heat, sucking harder, harder, and....
He exploded in her mouth. She swallowed him as he jerked helplessly under her touch and slowly eased her mouth off of his length. Sheer feminine power surged through her at his response, and in that moment she finally slew all her demons.
“What have you done to me?” he groaned.
She laughed, and resumed licking him. She stroked, rubbed, and caressed. In minutes, his cock was hard again. She fisted his powerful length, enjoying the texture of iron sheathed in silk. He lifted her in one quick movement, and settled her on her hands and knees. A tearing sound echoed.
“Rick, I, oh!”
He grasped her hips and entered her. She moaned and pushed back into his hands as he rubbed her ass. Slow, delicious strokes filled her, driving her higher and higher. Her breasts hung down free, and he played with them as he thrust in and out of her. The erotic abandon pumped through her body, tightening her muscles as she neared orgasm. She circled her hips, searching for it, but he only laughed and kept his strokes shallow enough to tease but not get her off.
His hands pinched her nipples. Slid down her belly, and found the tight nub of her clit. He rubbed, using her juices to coat it, and tapped hard with his fingers. Sharp pleasure grabbed, attacked, and threw her over. She cried out his name and ecstasy shot in waves over her. He came again, and collapsed on top of her in the bed, their limbs entangled. Her heart squeezed with a mingle of raw emotions. Tears pricked her eyes as she held him close and wished dawn had never come.
His lips traveled over her soft skin. The heady scent of sex and musk and strawberries hung heavily in the air. He stroked her lush breasts, her silky hair, the curve of her buttocks. The red digits on the clock flashed with alarming rapidness.
He wasn’t ready to let her go.
He closed his eyes and reached for courage. His one-night stand had become much more. He wanted the chance to date her. Cook her dinner. Make love to her in the daytime. Wash her in the shower.
Would she give him the opportunity?
Since Rebecca, he’d never had a soul connection to another woman like he’d found in a single evening with Tara. He also knew in his gut she was different. He knew by experience, his ex-fiancée had always been selfish in her core. Tara held the soul of a giver, and a man would be safe offering his trust.
So, he ripped down the last barriers of his heart and uttered the words. “Stay with me.”
She stiffened and sat up. Her curls tumbled wildly around her face. Blue eyes held a mixture of emotions at his words. Fear. Hope. Joy. Resolve. “What do you mean?” she asked. “The contract specifically states by dawn we need to walk away.”
“Let’s change the contract.” He reached to take her hand. “Remember when we spoke about not getting caught? It’s too late for me. I know it’s crazy, that we’ve only been together one night. But you caught me. I want to see where this can lead. I want to see you again.”
She flinched. He fought uneasiness at her reaction and waited. It was time to push out of his comfort zone. This woman would walk away if he didn’t try and fight for her. And by God, he would give it his all before he surrendered.
Her voice broke. “I can’t.”
His gaze dared her to speak the truth. “Why? You’re attracted to me. We formed a connection last night. There’s no reason not to take this further.”
Suddenly, he knew. Her eyes filled with tears as she stared at him, all the naked emotion and vulnerability and fear on display. “I’m not ready. What you gave me tonight...the things you made me feel...I don’t think another man will ever come close. But I made myself a promise. I’m not ready to commit to someone else yet. You gave me back my body, my mind, my freedom. You changed my life.”
She closed her eyes and one tear leaked down her cheek. When she opened them, a hard resolve glimmered and shattered his heart. “But I’m too afraid. Afraid I’m not ready for a relationship. Afraid I’m not strong enough not to stand on my own. I need time. I need to find my own way.”
He looked at the woman before him and realized he’d fallen in love with her.
She was stronger than anyone he’d ever met. Sexy as hell, sweet as sugar, and not ready to give him everything. Emptiness poured into the spaces of his soul and threatened to stay. But damn, he needed to let her go, needed to give her the time to realize what he did. She had already found her own path. She just needed to trust herself again.
If he didn’t leave, he’d overpower her. Make her have so many orgasms she’d beg him to stay. Force her to accept they were meant to be together, and then she’d always wonder. So, he shoved his need and want to the depths of darkness and locked it tight, bent his head and kissed her. Her sweetness swam in his head and he breathed in her scent one last time. Then rose from the bed and dressed.
“Thank you, Tara Denton.” He paused at the door. “Thank you for giving me the best night of my life.”
He opened the door and left.