They found me like that with my eyes red and my nose running, head pressed against the brick wall.

“I found him!” I heard someone shout in the distance.

I looked up to see Sal running toward me with his phone held up to his ear. He told whoever was on the other line my location and then hung up before placing the phone in his back pocket. The captain crouched down in front of me and put a hand on my shoulder. He didn’t say a word.

A few minutes later the rest of the team started showing up in groups of two and three. I couldn’t look any of them in the eye. All I wanted to do was crawl inside of my skin and hide.

Finally, when everyone else was accounted for, a wheezing Steve emerged to the front of the group.

“Hey, man,” he said between breaths. “I’m really sorry. I didn’t know it was supposed to be a secret.”

As badly as I wanted to ignore him, my curiosity was eating away at me.

“How did you even find out?” I whispered. My voice was like sandpaper.

Steve winced a tiny bit and rubbed the back of his neck.

“Shannon told me,” he said almost sympathetically. “She invited her brother to one of your games and when he was weirdly adamant that you didn’t play hockey, she asked how he knew that and he spilled the beans that the two of you were dating.”

My horror must have shown on my face because he winced again and raised his palms out in front of him.

“I haven’t told anyone else. I swear,” he promised. Then his voice got really quiet. “Except all of these guys…” He shifted his weight from one foot to the other.

I closed my eyes and let out a shaky breath. I just wanted this whole thing to be over.

“So now you know,” I whispered.

Sal’s hand tightened on my shoulder.

“Carter,” he said evenly. “We don’t care.”

I glanced up at him with furrowed brows and saw that he was being completely earnest.

“You don’t?” I asked, certain that he couldn’t be speaking for everybody.

“Dude,” said Matty. “I’m just mad you thought you couldn’t tell us. I mean, it’s 2018. It’s not like we’re a team full of conservative white guys.”

“Girlfriend or boyfriend.” Vinny grinned. “I still knew you were hung up on somebody.”

“Everything about you makes so much more sense now,” said Farmer. “It’s kind of a relief.”

Sandman was smiling at me in amusement. “So, that guy from the library was your boyfriend? No wonder you were acting so weird. Sorry I busted in on your date, man.”

Monster shrugged. “I mean, I’ve never met another gay guy before, but it doesn’t change the fact that you’ve changed the status of this team forever. I’m still kind of shocked honestly, but we’re still cool, bro. It doesn’t change the way I think about you.”

The team went on like this for several minutes with each member expressing his acceptance for me in one way or the other. By the time it got down to the last guy, Phony, my eyes were watery for a completely different reason.

Phony and I stared each other down for a few seconds. Sure, we had started off the season on less than great terms, but the two of us had spent so much time together since then. Out of any of my teammates, I think Phony had improved the most under my subtle guidance.

Finally he broke eye contact with me and shrugged.

“I don’t really give a shit if you like dicks up the ass or whatever. I’m having a thirty-point season because of you.”

Steve crossed his arms.

“Well, why were you offended when you thought I was gay then?” he huffed.

Phony narrowed his eyes.

“Because you’re an annoying fuckwit and Undies is one of the most talented people I’ve ever met.”

Everyone, except for Steve, burst into laughter.

I breathed a huge sigh of relief. I didn’t know how I got saddled with the most accepting nineteen guys in all of collegiate hockey. All I knew was that I was immensely grateful for all of them. Every single one.

“I’m sorry,” I said. “I guess I made it into a bigger deal than it needed to be. I just...I always had it in my head that I’d be playing in the MLH someday and I’ve heard so many horror stories from friends and coaches about homophobia in the league. They always treated it like a huge joke. Telling me all about it without realizing I was…that I was gay.”

My voice caught a little on the last sentence. It was the first time I’d said it to them out loud.

“We understand,” Sal said, rubbing my back. “And we promise never to tell anyone. We’re family. We’ve got your back. We’re gonna do whatever it takes to keep your secret safe, right?”

There were nods all around from everyone, including Steve.

“I think outing you to an entire team was enough,” he said. “Sorry about that. Again.”

I looked around from face to face and smiled, feeling more loved and supported than I ever had despite my lingering heartache.

“No,” I said finally. “I’m glad that you did.”

Sal was right. We were family. I hadn’t always thought so, but there was no use denying it any longer. Their acceptance felt like a miracle to me; like a cinder block suddenly lifted off of my shoulders. I decided right then and there that I was going to do everything in my power to give them a miracle right back.