Chapter 32

Frankie

“Wake up sleepy head!” I whacked a pillow across the lump of Val’s body under the blankets.

She groaned. “It’s the day before my wedding. I don’t have to wake up early if I don’t want to.”

“It’s a good thing it’s nearly ten, then.” I smacked her again. “Come on. It’s time for your bachelorette party.”

Val’s mop of blonde hair rotated on the pillow and one peering eye emerged. “My bachelorette party?”

“Yes, your bachelorette party,” I replied, laughing. “Didn’t I tell you it was happening?”

“But I can’t be wasted for the rehearsal dinner tonight.”

“You won’t be. We’re not drinking.”

She shuffled up against the pillows a little and ran her hand through her hair, trying to tame her scarecrow locks. “Are we skiing? I don’t want to ski.”

“Nope.”

“What the hell is there to do up here besides ski and drink?” she asked.

I flashed the glossy menu in my hand. “Duh. The spa!”

Valerie giggled maniacally and shot forward, snatching the spa menu out of my hand. “No way! We’re having a spa day?” she asked. “God, I feel like such a girl right now. I need to calm down before I pull something.”

“Hey, get as excited as you want. It’s your day.” I leaned over and flipped through the menu, landing on the second to last page. “This is what I have booked for us. Facials, massages, body scrubs, and some hella indulging soaks. We’re going to walk out of that place new people.”

“I can’t wait. How long do I have to get ready?”

I checked the time on my phone. “About...fifteen minutes.”

Val didn’t waste any more time chatting. She vaulted out of bed and ran around the room getting dressed. I stayed out of the way of the whirlwind and patted myself on the back for a job well done. Val and I were going to have a great spa day, and as a lovely side benefit spending the day in the spa would keep me out of Levi’s path for an easy six hours.

Avoiding him for the past couple of days had been surprisingly easy with all the wedding prep going on. I felt a little bad for doing so, especially since when I left the bar the other night he came looking for me and I pretended like I wasn’t in my room. My dance floor revelation had left me shaken and staying clear of Levi seemed the best thing I could do.

“I don’t need to wear anything special do I?” Val asked.

“Girl, you never been to a spa before? We’re just going to get naked under some fluffy robes.”

She paused long enough to wiggle her eyebrows at me. “Sounds sensational.”

I made Val a coffee while she finished getting ready and she slammed it back before we headed out.

The spa was an oasis of relaxation. The gurgling of running water greeted us as we entered, courtesy of the cascading waterfall on one side of the room. Soft instrumental music hummed through the air and a woman with long black hair and a welcoming smile checked us in for our treatments and gave us directions to the changing rooms.

“I’m already relaxed,” Val commented, stripping off in front of the row of lockers.

“Tell me about it.” I sighed. “I needed this.”

“Me too. Great idea, Frankie.” She squeezed my arm. “You always know what’s best for me.”

Our first treatment was a full body massage in a room that smelled of cedar and wood smoke. We lay on tables next to each other as silent masseuses worked out all the kinks and aches in our muscles.

I soaked in the atmosphere and willed myself not to stress. Not here. This spa was much too expensive to let any negative thoughts follow me here, but it was hard not to when they buzzed around my head constantly and had been for days.

“You’ve got a knot up here that won’t quit,” said my masseuse, an impossibly tall blonde woman with hands the size of oven mitts.

She ground her knuckles between my shoulders and I let out a gasp of pain.

Val snickered.

“There, that should do it,” my masseuse said in soothing tone. “It’ll return if you keep holding tension though. You must have something on your mind.”

My eyebrow twitched in irritation. Was she a shrink or a masseuse?

“Speaking of something on your mind,” Val said. “What’s going on with you and Levi?”

I felt myself tense and my masseuse tsked.

“Nothing,” I said, letting my muscles turn to goo against the bed. “I’ve barely talked to him.”

“That’s what I mean. You two seemed friendly for a minute and then nothing. Kaput. Did you fall out again?”

I swallowed and considered my options. I could lie to Val. If I told her he’d pissed me off she’d swallow it unquestioningly, and then I wouldn’t have to say out loud the thing that had been squatting in my brain for the past couple of days.

Or, I could tell her the truth—because she was my best friend, and because if I was going to tell anyone, I wanted it to be her.

I cleared my throat. It felt weird having this kind of talk while my face was sticking out through the bottom of a pleather donut and a stranger was rubbing me down, but hell, sometimes there’s no better time or place.

“Okay, so I was dancing with Levi that night that Josh tried to kiss me,” I began. “And I guess I just kind of realized something.”

“Go on,” Val encouraged.

“I think I’m in love with him.”

Val gasped. “With Levi?”

I snorted. “Well not with Josh, obviously.”

That’s amazing!” Val squealed. “You guys can get married and we’ll be sisters! Backyard barbecues, Christmas brunch...hey, we should try to get pregnant around the same time.”

“Woah, hold up there, sparky,” I said. “This is not amazing. It sucks. I already know Levi doesn’t feel the same for me, which is why I’ve been putting some distance between us for the past couple of days. I needed some space.”

Val was quiet for a minute.

“Maybe we’re not at tandem baby stage yet,” she said finally, “but I wouldn’t be so flippant about Levi’s feelings. You don’t know that he doesn’t have feelings for you too.”

“He has given me zero indication that he does. I’m just playing it safe.”

She chuckled. “You can’t play it safe in love. That’s not how it works.”

“Easy for you to say.”

“You don’t think Garrick and I had our struggles? I almost didn’t go on our first date because I was scared he was playing a practical joke on me. The first time I met his parents I nearly had a panic attack in the car outside the restaurant because I thought they were going to filet me.”

“Okay, fine,” I said with a sigh. “But Levi isn’t Garrick. He told me straight up he’s happier alone.”

“Stop listening to what Levi says and start looking at what he does,” she replied. “He’s gone through a transformation since you came into his life. When I first met Levi, he was a perennial grump, and now he’s a friendly giant.”

“He’s still a grump.”

She laughed. “He wouldn’t be Levi if he weren’t, but you know exactly what I mean. I wouldn’t be so sure that your feelings are unrequited.”

“I love what you’re trying to do, but I think it’ll be better for me in the long run not to cling onto foolish hope,” I said.

“What are you going to do? Just hope the feelings go away?”

“Exactly.”

Val sighed. “It doesn’t work that way.”

“Maybe not,” I conceded, “but I’ll try anything once.”

“You’ve both been hurt before—badly—but I think it would be a mistake to let that pain steer you wrong.”

I frowned. “I’m not.”

“Are you sure?”

Clearing my throat, I said, “We’re supposed to be relaxing.”

“Yes, you are,” chimed my masseuse.

“We’re going to talk about this again,” Val said in a singsong voice. “You won’t put me off that easy.”

“After the wedding.” I closed my eyes and began to slip back into warm, fuzzy relaxation mode. “For now, I am all about you.”

A year of work and here we were. The rehearsal dinner.

Our party took up the whole back wall of the restaurant, seated around one long table lit by flickering candle columns and decorated with white rose petals and pearls.

Val and Garrick were sandwiched together on one side of the table at their insistence, while Levi and I flanked them. Both sets of parents were there, across from each other so neither would feel like the other got a better spot at the table. Josh was near the end with another two of Val’s cousins, and a few Wheeler cousins who I hadn’t yet been introduced to shuffled in late to fill the extra spaces.

While it was traditional for the groom’s parents to host the rehearsal dinner (and Molly and Gerhart had certainly tried), Val and Garrick were anything but traditional. They hosted the dinner themselves.

I thought it was a brilliant idea. The Wheelers and the Fieldmans were already butting heads at every possible occasion, and I could see a rehearsal dinner hosted by Gerhart and Molly turning into a disaster if Justine and Victor started to feel outdone.

We placed our orders and Val tapped her champagne glass, bringing the party to silence.

“I want to make a toast,” she announced.

Everyone grabbed their glasses and Val rose. Garrick stared up at her adoringly, resting one of his hands over hers.

“I wanted to thank you all for coming,” Val said. “Nearly one year ago today, this man asked me to be his wife.” She squeezed Garrick’s hand and met his gaze. “Almost immediately afterward, I called an up and coming wedding planner named Francesca Aurelio in a frenzy.” Val looked to me, smiling. “Now I’m here today with all the people I love most in my life, including my best friend Frankie, who has worked her ass off to make this wedding a success. I couldn’t be happier. Thank you, Frankie.” She swept her gaze over the table. “And thank you all for coming to make our big day the best it could be. I hope you all have a wonderful time and drink lots at the open bar.” She lifted her glass. “Cheers.”

“Cheers,” the table echoed and we all clinked glasses.

My eye met Levi’s over the table and my stomach flipped. I looked away. Apparently, I had not yet taken enough time to settle my feelings. How crazy.

Val sat back down, and Garrick went to stand. To my surprise, Levi cleared his throat and shot to his feet before Garrick did. I looked up at him, frowning. I hadn’t expected Levi to make a speech tonight, not when he was already set to make one tomorrow. He eschewed the spotlight whenever possible.

“Hi everyone, I’m Levi,” he began, dangling a hand from his pocket. “I’m the best man, and tomorrow I’m going to treat you to a variety of hilarious and tear-jerking stories about this handsome man right here.”

Levi clasped Garrick’s shoulder and squeezed. Everyone chuckled.

“Tonight, however, I wanted to say this.” Levi looked down at Val and Garrick. “Garrick, Val, I’m not going to wish you the best. I’m not going to pray for a happy union or hope that everything goes well tomorrow. I don’t need to. You have the kind of love that doesn’t rely on luck or vague promises, and even though sometimes your constant affection is disgusting, you both inspire me every day because you create and maintain your own happiness. I’m delighted to share this journey with you.” He raised his glass. “To Val and Garrick.”

“To Val and Garrick!” the table sang.

As soon as they’d finished toasting, the guests broke out into applause.

Hell, I joined them. I didn’t realize Levi had that kind of sentiment in him.

Val gave me a discreet elbow in the side, and when I tossed her a questioning glance she raised her eyebrows, as if to say, See?

I looked away. Only problem was, if I wasn’t looking at Val, my next obvious choice was Levi. Luckily, Gerhart stood up to make a speech next and gave me a new focal point. I hoped these speeches went on forever so I could focus on them and not on my tumbling mess of emotions, the sticky yet fluffy sensation of hope in my gut.

Though Josh and a couple of the other cousins headed to the bar after dinner, the rest of us prepared for an early night. Val and Garrick went for a walk in the snow before bed, their last walk before they became husband and wife, and I took a detour on the way to my room to visit the plate glass window that had seemed to hold all the secrets of the universe the last time I was at the hotel.

It was just where I’d left it. I could barely make out the garden, though was able to spot the hedges from the strings of white fairy lights hanging off them. Even if I couldn’t see a thing I would still stand there and stare out. It was the perfect place to think, to process, and I hoped that my quiet window contemplation might help quell the anxiety pulsing in my throat.

I always felt nervous before a wedding, even when it ran as smoothly as this one was, but this time there was a little extra sprinkled on top. A little extra something called Levi.

A snowflake hit the window and skittered down. I thought I’d imagined it at first, but then another one swept past, and soon there were dozens of them. I thought of Garrick and Val on their walk, but I wasn’t worried. They were probably laughing and dancing in it, hopelessly in love.

I heard soft footsteps behind me. A guest on the way to their room, I supposed. I was surprised when a figure pulled up beside me.

“I wonder if we’re going to get snowed in,” Levi mused.

My heart clenched. I didn’t turn to look at him, knowing I’d be a goner as soon as I did.

“I doubt it,” I said. “I’m going to head to bed. Goodnight.”

I turned on my heel to leave but Levi grasped my arm. “Frankie.”

Swallowing, I met his gaze. “What?”

Jeez, did he have to be so damn good looking? He towered over me, the lines of his face as sharply cut as the lines of his suit. His dark brown eyes searched mine, and then he leaned down and kissed me.

I froze. I wanted to give in. I ached to give in. One brush of his lips over mine and desire pooled thick and hot in my belly, demanding satisfaction.

But the sharp taste of wine danced over my tongue and I knew this wasn’t right.

Levi and I had barely spoken all night, save for the usual polite conversation and things like “pass the salt”. He wasn’t kissing me because he burned for me like I burned for him. He was kissing me because he was wine drunk, horny, and we were both here.

He was kissing me because it was convenient.

I pulled away. Confusion flashed in his eyes, but I turned and made a dash for my room.

“Frankie, wait!” he called after me.

I ignored him, though my feet begged me to stop and go back. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe he did mean it.

I blinked back tears, wondering if there was some way I could expel this hope that was turning me inside out.

It was really starting to get on my nerves.