Chapter 15
Imogen
I pull up to my parents’ place for our weekly family lunch and the first thing I notice is Cole’s truck parked in the drive. I cringe as I see it. Just the thought of walking in there and not knowing how it’s going to go is intimidating.
It’s been nearly a week since he found out and nearly a week since he’s spoken a word to me. He called me that night and absolutely lost his shit. The betrayal was thick in his voice and I couldn’t do anything except sit there and listen to his pain.
Shit, I must be the worst sister in the world right now. He must truly hate me.
It’s been really hard. He usually makes an effort to speak to me every single day, whether it’s just a quick text checking in or a visit. Not having him talking to me for so long is gut-wrenching, but the one thing I know about my brother is that when he needs his space, you better give it to him.
With a sigh, I get out of my car and make my way inside. I walk straight into the kitchen and the first person I see is mom. She turns at hearing the door closing and I see the look of pity right across her face. “Oh, honey,” she sighs before wrapping me in a tight hug and holding me close. “I always knew you had a thing for that boy.”
“I don’t have a thing for that boy,” I reply but let her keep holding me.
“Mmhmm,” she murmurs as though she doesn’t believe a word I say, and honestly, I’m not quite sure I do either. “For what it counts,” she says. “He would have made an incredible husband.”
“Mom,” I groan. “It’s not like that between us.”
She pulls me back but holds onto my shoulders. “I’ve seen the way he looks at you, Imogen. That man adores you and always has. It would have been like that had you allowed it.”
I let out a huff. I don’t want to hear it, not because I don’t want my mother scolding me for my reckless actions, but because everything she says is true. Caden has always adored me. He’s always treated me like I was his world, even when he was being an ass with my brother growing up, he’d always make sure I was ok. I guess I just don’t want to face facts. It was supposed to be about sex, nothing else.
“Can we not talk about it?” I practically beg, but really, I think if she keeps asking I might finally shed the tears I’ve been holding onto.
“Alright,” she says, “But be warned. Your brother’s out back and he looks furious. I’m certain he’s going to want to talk about it.”
“I know,” I groan. “I owe him an explanation.”
“That, you do,” she agrees. “You should have been honest with him.”
“I know,” I groan, getting frustrated at the way she’s pointing out the elephant in the room.
“Go and talk to him,” she says. “I want to get lunch cooked and it will never happen with you in my kitchen sulking around. I want your differences cleared up by the time lunch is on the table,” she adds. “I’m not having any cussing while we’re sitting down as a family.”
“Fine,” I groan before peeking out the kitchen window to the backyard.
Cole sits on the couch with a beer in hand, but from the way it dangles from his fingers, he’s not interested in drinking it. Just great. Cole is a party guy. He’s up for a beer anytime, except when he’s wanting to keep a clear head, and there’s only one reason for that right now. He wants to give me hell.
I step out of the kitchen and take a deep breath. I have to face him sooner or later. As I make my way outside, I pass Rylee. “Hey,” she says stopping me with a slight cringe, probably wondering if it’s going to be awkward between us since she bombarded me at my home. “How are you?”
“Honestly, I’ve been better,” I tell her. “I don’t like when he’s upset with me.”
“I know,” she sighs. “I’m sorry about the other night. I just… he’s my person.”
“Don’t worry about it. I’m sure I would have done the same thing in your position,” I tell her before looking around her to see Cole’s eyes narrowed on me. “How’s he taking it?”
“Not good,” she cringes. “He has the shits with the world. He’s upset that I didn’t tell him when I first suspected it and he’s been a broody ass since Tuesday. He hasn’t spoken a word to Caden since he tried to knock him out and he’s even going as far to train Xander at his gym instead.”
“Shit,” I cringe. “I’m sorry. Did he really try to knock him out?”
“You don’t know?” she questions.
“No,” I say. “Caden hasn’t spoken to me all week. I’m sure he wants to sort things out with Cole first.”
“Yeah, well, it’s not going to get better for any of you until Cole can come to terms with it and to do that, he needs to talk to you.”
“Yeah, I know,” I tell her. “I’m going to talk with him now.”
She reaches out and squeezes my shoulder. “Alright, good luck,” she says before disappearing inside.
I step out the back door and turn to face Cole. His eyes are already flaming and he gets to his feet. “Well,” he starts. “If it isn’t my backstabbing little sister.”
“Cole,” I say. “I’m sorry.”
“Oh, now you want to talk?” he snaps with an impossible amount of sarcasm. “What happened to talking a fucking year ago, Imogen? It’s been thirteen months. Thirteen months you could have come to me, but you didn’t. You lied right to my fucking face.”
“Cole,” I say, trying to get him to calm down, but I know he won’t stop until he gets it all out.
“He’s my best friend,” he says. “Why him? Were you trying to get at me for something? Did I piss you off?” he lets out a curse before starting up again. “Do you want to be with him?” he questions, throwing me completely off.
“No… I, um.”
“Shit,” he curses. “It’s a yes or a fucking no, Imogen. Do you want to be with him?”
“I don’t know,” I finally admit. “It just happened. I wasn’t trying to get at you or anything like that. I feel like shit that I didn’t tell you, but I was scared.”
“Scared?” he grunts, cutting me off. “I’d never fucking hurt you.”
“No. Not scared of you. I was scared you’d make me stop.”
“Of course, I would have made you stop,” he yells as though it’s so damn obvious.
“Exactly my point. I like spending time with him and I wasn’t ready for it to be over,” I explain. “It just happened, alright? I was drinking and it happened. Neither of us had the intentions of hurting you, and you’re right, I should have told you straight away.”
“Yeah, you should have told me,” he says as the rage begins to fade from his eyes. Disappointment and hurt flash across his face and tears my heart to shreds. “I thought we could always tell each other the truth.”
At that, the tears that I’ve been holding onto finally break free. “I’m so sorry,” I cry. “I just…” a sob rips from my throat. “Don’t hate me. Please, don’t hate me. I couldn’t take it.”
“Fuck,” he curses before rushing to me. He wraps his warm arms around me and holds me close. “I could never hate you. I’m just hurt that you kept it from me and went behind my back. You know, if you truly liked him, I would have got used to it eventually.”
“Yeah, right,” I scoff into his shirt while also using it to dry my eyes.
“It would have been hard, but if it meant that you both were happy, then I would have dealt with it.”
I pull out of his arms and try to get myself together. “You know, I love you, right?”
“I know,” he says. “I love you too.”
I cringe as I look up at him, a little unsure if I should be asking, but I need to know. “Are, um… do you think you’ll sort things out with Caden?”
He shakes his head and presses his lips into a tight line before finally taking a sip of his drink. “I don’t know, Imogen. He’s my best friend, but I can’t look at him without wanting to knock his lights out. Every time I see him, I see you and him, and it kills me.”
“If it helps, I was the one who asked him not to say anything. He wanted to tell you so badly, but I wasn’t ready.”
“I figured,” he grunts. “It’s not like him to keep secrets from me. That’s all you.”
“Yeah,” I agree.
He lets out a breath and I know the worst is over. We’re going to be ok. “So, um,” he says with a cringe of his own. “You two… Were you guys actually together or was it just a” cringe, “physical thing?”
Jesus, save me now.
“It was just physical,” I tell him, unable to meet his eye.
“And you don’t want anything more?” he confirms.
At that, I look him straight in the eye. “Honestly,” I say. “I don’t know.”
I manage to make it through lunch without pissing off any more of my family members and finally get myself home only to end up at a bar with Izzy, completely and utterly wasted.
After hearing from Cole that things are still rocky with Caden and will be for a while, I can’t help but feel responsible. It’s my fault that all this happened. Caden is risking losing his best friend because I was a horny bitch.
Fuck.
It’s that thought that has me throwing back another shot.
“You know,” Izzy starts which has me sliding my eyes across to her as she throws back a shot of her own before cringing at the burn. “I knew all along.”
“What?” I shriek. “That’s not possible. Nobody knew.”
“I knew,” she slurs proudly. “But good for you. I’m so jealous. Caden is fucking hot. I need to find me a man like him. I can only imagine how good the sex is.”
I ignore her running comments and focus on the important stuff. You know, apart from confirming just how good the sex was. I mean, mind fucking blowing. “Why didn’t you tell me?” I question.
She gives me a look which tells me she just knows me that well. “Because I knew you’d tell me when you were ready. I just didn’t expect it to take so damn long.”
I roll my eyes at her comments. “When did you work it out?”
“Right at the beginning when you stopped sleeping around. You know, the night those guys were offering you a threesome.”
“What?” I gasp. “I was always going to say no to that. It’s hardly a massive indicator that I was screwing my brother’s best friend.”
“First off, you would have said no to the threesome, but you would have taken one of the guys home, and secondly, I only knew there was a ‘someone’ at that stage. I didn’t work out that it was Caden until I noticed the way you looked at each other.”
“Huh?” I grunt. “What do you mean?”
“Well, before, it was always innocent, but then you’d start lighting up when he was in the room and every time you looked at each other, your eyes would sparkle. It was dazzling,” she says. “Anyone with two eyes would have been able to tell that you two were falling for each other.”
“Whoa,” I grunt. “Slow the fuck down, cowgirl. We weren’t falling for each other. It was no strings attached, wild, dirty sex.”
“Denial,” she says, mimicking the voice of Bruce from Finding Nemo.
I roll my eyes. I am not in denial. I was the one actually experiencing the wild sex fests. I know firsthand what it was, and I know there was no falling going on. At least, not from me. If Caden was doing this so-called ‘falling’ I would have known about it. I mean, sure, he might have had a bit of a crush on me, treated me nice and took care of me, but I’d know if a man was in love with me.
I indicate to the guy behind the bar. We’re going to need a few more shots down this way.
Needing to move on from the whole ‘falling’ thing, I turn to Izzy with a grin. “We had sex in your bed.”
“What?” she demands, but all I can do is grin. Her eyes narrow and she slowly shakes her head as a grin of her own rips across her face. “You little hussy.”