Chapter Twelve

 

Cam was kneeling at his feet, but only J’Ssett was present so she had relaxed the pose and leaned in to his legs. He stroked her hair absently as he listened to the man report. She didn’t seem to be paying any attention to their conversation until J’Ssett mentioned inspecting the Market. Her head popped up.

“Market?”

Kievan looked down at her and his lips quirked.

“Yes, pet.”

“For shopping?”

“That’s what the Market is for,” he agreed solemnly.

“Can I go with J’Ssett?” She obviously read the refusal on his face and added hastily, “Please? You know I can behave.”

“Actually, I’m not at all convinced of that.”

Her face fell and he sighed, hoping he wasn’t about to make a bad decision.

“These are the rules. You go hooded and cloaked and you stay that way. You do not speak to anyone directly and you never leave J’Ssett’s side. When you want to buy something, J’Ssett will make the purchase.” He turned to J’Ssett. “Don’t let her out of your sight. Take a guard…no, take two guards and make sure they understand what will happen to them if they fail me.”

J’Ssett nodded solemnly and Kievan turned back to Cam.

“Do you understand the rules, pet?”

“Yes, Master.”

“And you will obey them?”

“Yes, Master.”

“Very well. You can go.”

“Yay!” She jumped up and threw herself into his lap, kissing his neck.

“Thank you, honey,” she whispered. Then she hesitated. “Could you come with us?”

He could hear the longing in her voice and he was tempted, knowing he would enjoy her wide-eyed wonder and also wanting to be there to protect her. Unfortunately, his presence would draw attention to her and he wanted to avoid that for as long as possible.

“No, sweetness. Not this time.”

He saw the disappointment in her eyes but she nodded. Then she kissed him, long and sweet. When he raised his head, he saw J’Ssett watching them, an unreadable expression on his face.

 

Cam stood next to J’Ssett, trying to contain her excitement as the elevator descended. Two guards stood behind them, massive and silent.

“The top levels are generally more expensive so that’s where you’ll find the largest housing, the best restaurants, and the finest shops.” J’Ssett was explaining the layout of the station. “The lowesst levels have the docking sstations, repair shops, and refueling posts. The area between there and the market is lesss expensive. As a result, it is crowded and can be dangerous. You would not be ssafe there. You should avoid that area.”

Cam looked at him, looked at the guards, then back at him. “Is there any chance I’m going there?’ she asked drily.

A brief smile curved his lips and he nodded his head in acknowledgement. “None, misss.”

He continued his lecture. “The Market is approximately central. Everyone comes here. It is heavily patrolled and relatively ssafe but it can be…volatile. Pay attention to your ssurroundings. If one of the guards tells you to do ssomething, obey immediately.”

She shot another glance at the looming guards and wondered briefly if they were even capable of speech. But then the doors opened and she forgot the speech capabilities of the guards. A cacophony of noise filled the elevator, voices that ranged from growls to shrieks, the clang of metal against metal, and the piercing cries of sellers hawking their wares. One guard moved in front of her, J’Ssett stepped to her side, and the other guard brought up the rear as they stepped out of the elevator. The smells were as varied as the sounds. She caught a whiff of something frying that made her stomach growl but it was immediately followed by a pungent aroma uneasily reminiscent of a barnyard.

Accustomed to the cool white serenity of Kievan’s level, the variety of hues was equally shocking. Colorful stalls, some temporary, some permanent, crowded together to form a maze of pathways, and most of them had an equally colorful display of goods to tempt the buyer deeper into the labyrinth. A mass of people filled the empty spaces between the stalls and Cam tried to keep from gaping at the number and variety of alien life forms.

“What would you like to ssee first, misss?” J’Ssett asked, raising his voice slightly to be heard over the din.

“I don’t know,” Cam said a little helplessly. She looked around, searching for inspiration and caught sight of a red silk hanging fluttering in the distance. “What’s that?”

“I believe that’s the glass ssection.”

Suddenly inspired, Cam nodded decisively. “Let’s go there.”

 

Some time later, Cam wandered happily but aimlessly through a set of stalls with animals for sale. She had made a few purchases which J’Ssett had arranged to be sent to their quarters. No longer interested in buying, she stopped at one stall long enough to watch two tiny, white, goat-like animals butt heads playfully. Many of the animals were completely foreign to her but these reminded her of Earth. The presence of live animals on the station surprised her but J’Ssett explained that, while some were intended for pets, most of them provided fresh meat, milk or cheese. She hoped that the two adorable animals in front of her were destined to provide food rather than become food.

Her attention turned to the crowd surrounding her and she watched them thoughtfully while she sucked on the pleasant but odd tasting popsicle J’Ssett had bought for her. It was a significant improvement over the wonderful smelling but completely horrid tasting fried pastry she had tried first. With a shock, she realized that all of her meals with Kievan had been delicious. He only fed her things she liked and the ones she liked best, he gave her most often. Her stomach fluttered pleasantly as she realized how closely he must watch her to be able to do that. She stroked her bracelets, wishing that he could have been here with her.

Forcing her mind away from the sudden longing for Kievan, she watched the crowd. Pairs of Kievan’s gray-skinned guards appeared frequently. No one race predominated but she saw quite a few purple-skinned Gliesh and wondered if any of them were related to Sonda and Leeda. A few times she saw a striking alien with red skin, dark hair, and horns springing from his brow. From a distance he resembled a mythical devil but she never got close enough to see how accurate the resemblance was because her party always seemed to head in a different direction.

She noticed that there weren’t many females and they always travelled in pairs. Men openly turned to watch any woman that passed by although, for the most part, they didn’t watch her. She wasn’t sure if it was because of the guards or the heavy cloak but she was grateful either way. Once she saw a half-naked woman standing at the entrance to a tiny alley. A large horned alien grabbed her cuffed wrist and started to pull her into the alley. The woman looked up and her hopeless eyes met Cam’s. Instinctively Cam started toward the woman but J’Ssett took her arm and gently but firmly herded her away. Remembering the first morning when Kievan had told her she was free to leave, she shivered at the thought of what her fate might have been.

Despite the variety of aliens, she hadn’t seen anyone who resembled J’Ssett.

“Where do you come from?” she asked him, not quite sure if it was polite to ask.

“A ssmall planet a long way from here.”

“Is anyone from your planet on the station?”

“No. My people do not travel in sspace much.”

A wave of compassion swept over here. “It’s hard being the only person from your planet,” she said softly. “I wish I could meet another human.”

His eyes flicked to hers but he didn’t respond.

“How did you end up here?”

“Lord Kievan ssaved my life. He was wounded in the effort and I sstayed with him until he healed. When he left my planet, I came with him.”

“Why do I have a feeling there is more to the story than that?”

His lips quirked but he didn’t add anything else. With a sigh, Cam turned back to her people watching.

Only two other events disturbed the enjoyable outing. The first incident occurred as they were moving through the food stalls. There was a loud crash off to the left, followed by an escalating stream of insults and profanity. The crowd started to move restlessly, then there was a scream, and Cam saw a silver flash from the corner of her eye. Before she saw anything else, she found herself tucked into a corner, J’Ssett at her side and the large bodies of the two guards directly in front of her, their wings spread to block out the crowd. Cries and scuffles echoed through the enclosed space. She tried to peek around the guards but J’Ssett shook his head so she waited, not very patiently, until the riot subsided. When she was released from her corner, the only signs of the disturbance were some overturned carts and a few people with blood dripping from various wounds. The blood was not always red and for some reason, Cam found that more disturbing that the actual incident.

The second disturbance occurred as they were traveling through the fabric district. An alien was headed in their direction. He didn’t seem to be paying any attention to them but he drew Cam’s attention because she hadn’t seen anyone like him and because he was particularly unpleasant looking. He was tall and skeletal with yellow eyes and a round red mouth filled with double rows of teeth. As he came closer, she dropped her eyes but as he passed by he stopped suddenly and sniffed the air. Immediately he turned and grabbed her arm, hauling her toward him so quickly and with such surprising strength that she barely had time to gasp. His fingers tightened painfully on her arm and she opened her mouth to scream and then he was gone.

One of her guards had the man suspended by his neck, the guard’s beefy hand digging into the frail looking stalk. Despite the man’s fragile appearance, he fought back with the strength that had surprised her. The second guard joined the struggle and clamped the man’s hands hard against his sides. The guards held the man captive until reinforcements arrived a short time later and dragged the man away.

“Are you all right, miss?” It was the first guard and Cam suddenly recognized him as the one who had smiled at her on the first day.

“Yes, I’m fine. Thank you…”

“My name is Mikaroz, miss.”

“Thank you, Mikaroz.” He nodded, gave her a friendly grin, and moved back in to position. Very soon after the second incident, they were on their way home.

 

Kievan paused just inside the door to their rooms. He could hear Cam singing happily in the shower. It had been a difficult day for him. His office had seemed unusually empty without her warm presence and he had worried about her the entire time. His guards had reported back to him at regular intervals but it hadn’t helped. The minor riot infuriated him even though she hadn’t been harmed. He had gritted his teeth and barely refrained from ordering her home.

The fact that a stranger had actually grabbed her was unacceptable and he immediately sent word that she was to be returned. He also intended to have a visit with the imprisoned attacker first thing in the morning. The assault seemed too targeted to be just a man looking for a woman to drag off and rape.

The water in the shower stopped running and he walked into the bedroom to wait for her. A subtle fragrance attracted his attention and he focused on the source—a cluster of flowers in a red vase on the table. Turning to scan the rest of the space, he immediately noticed the other changes. Two red pillows, heavily embroidered in gold, nestled amongst the usual pristine white pillows at the head of the bed. A soft red throw was flung carelessly over one of the curved couches. A row of red votives stood on the low coffee table. Only a few changes, but somehow they managed to add life to the room, to change it from a beautiful impersonal space to something resembling a home.

The bathroom door opened and Cam emerged, wrapped in a towel. Her face lit up as she saw him and she raced to him, raising her face for a kiss as always. As soon as he released her mouth, she started talking.

“You’re home early, honey.” His chest seized as she echoed his earlier thought. “I’m so glad. I bought a few things. I hope you don’t mind but I thought it would be nice to have something other than white and gold for a change. You don’t mind, do you?” She looked at him anxiously and he shook his head. “Oh, good. And see what else I found.”

She tugged him over to the seating area and he saw a framed print lying against the couch.

“J’Ssett told me he could hang it so it wouldn’t damage the walls but he needed to get the hanger first. Do you like it?”

He stared at the print, a beautifully framed scroll rendered in ancient Sardoran calligraphy.

“Isn’t it beautiful?” she asked. “I know it’s Sardoran but I can’t read the words.”

“It’s the old version of the language,” he answered absently.

“Can you read it?” she asked eagerly.

He could but somehow he couldn’t face translating the ancient love poem for her. Instead, he gestured around the room. “Is this what you bought at the market?”

She looked at him uncertainly. “Yes. You said I could buy whatever I wanted.” Her eyes traveled to the vase. “I’m glad I could find flowers. I used to buy fresh flowers every week for my mother.”

“I meant for you to buy things for yourself.”

Her face relaxed and she shrugged, leaning in to wrap her arms around his waist. “I don’t need anything. I just wanted to make our rooms a little cozier. I hope you like it.”

Without another word, he swept her up in his arms and carried her to the bed. A long time later, she opened her eyes and smiled at him. “I guess you like it.”

Later that evening they were sitting on the couch. Kievan was working, trying to catch up on some of the tasks he had been too distracted to complete during the day. Cam was lying with her head on his thigh, reading. A knock sounded on the door and before he could answer, it opened and Talasi entered. She went immediately to her knees, head bowed.

“Please, Lord Kievan. I need…” Her voice was shaking and he could barely hear it across the room. He felt Cam’s body tense and he cursed silently under his breath. He should have anticipated that this would occur.

“Head to the floor, Talasi,” he ordered and he saw some of the tension flow out of her body as she dropped into a prone position.

Cam sat up, her lip trembling but she didn’t say anything. He pulled her close so he could talk to her without Talasi overhearing. Her body stiffened but she came.

“It’s not what you think, little flower,” he said quietly. “She doesn’t need fucking, she needs punishing.”

She frowned. “I don’t understand.”

“She wants me to whip her.” He paused. “She wants me to hurt her.”

Her eyes grew wide. “Why?”

“I will try and explain later, but now she needs this.” He hesitated. “Perhaps this would be good time to visit Sonda and Leeda.”

“Do you want me to leave?”

He considered the idea. He didn’t want her to see this; he didn’t want her to know he was the kind of man he had to be to do it. But her trust was a fragile thing—and she had made these rooms their home. He stroked her cheek. “No, sweetness. I won’t ask you to leave our rooms. But this might be…difficult for you.”

“I want to stay,” she said after a brief consideration.

“Very well. Then kneel, pet, and do not speak until I give you permission.”

She sank gracefully to her knees and he turned to Talasi.

 

Cam watched as Kievan walked to the other woman and ordered her to stand. His voice was hard and almost unrecognizable. Talasi stood and walked to the golden wall sculpture. Cam could see the eagerness in her stride. She studied the other woman’s face as she came closer. Her features were very human, only her pointed ears varying from the norm, but her skin was a soft dark green, her hair a long spill of even darker green. She looked like a beautiful wood nymph out of a child’s fairy tale.

As soon as she reached the wall, she turned toward it and dropped her dress. Cam flinched but managed not to make a sound as she saw the scars that covered the other woman’s back. Her back was covered with scars from just above her shoulder blades to her upper thighs.

Kievan manipulated the wall and created a diagonal cross. He fastened Talasi’s wrists and ankles to the cross so that she was spread-eagled. Then he pulled a whip from the cabinet.

“Are you ready?” he asked.

“Yes, Lord Kievan,” Talasi said, and again, Cam could hear the eagerness in her voice.

Without any additional warning, Kievan brought the whip down across Talasi’s back. The whip echoed in the quiet room and Talasi’s body jerked. Cam curled her nails into her palms to keep from screaming. The whipping continued. Talasi never made a sound. Cam watched in horror as thin lines of blood appeared across the other woman’s scarred back. Kievan continued until Talasi finally cried out, a shout that sounded almost ecstatic, and sagged against the cross. By that time, Cam’s palms were bleeding from her efforts to keep still and not cry out.

Kievan released Talasi from the cross. She stood limp, Kievan grasping her shoulders to keep her on her feet while he folded the wall back into place.

“Come here, pet,” Kievan ordered. Cam rose reluctantly to her feet and obeyed. How could he have done such a terrible thing? As she approached, he reached for her arm and she flinched, suddenly terrified. He let his hand drop.

“Look at her face,” he ordered. Still reluctant, Cam lifted her eyes to Talasi’s face. The other woman’s eyes were closed. Tear stains marked her cheeks but her face was peaceful, almost beatific.

“Remember that look. I’ll take her back to her quarters and call an attendant.”

He picked Talasi up and carried her out of the room. As soon as he left, Cam raced to the bathroom and lost the contents of her stomach. She was still crouched over the toilet, shaking, when Kievan returned. He picked her up and she fought him, panicking at his hold.

“Stop that, pet.” He carried her to the sink, made her brush her teeth, and washed her face in cold water. Gently he unfolded her hands, hissing at the bleeding nail wounds. He washed those, too, and rubbed healing gel into the small cuts. Cam’s body stayed rigid and she jumped every time he moved. He sighed and picked her up anyway, carrying her back to the couch.

As soon as he sat down with her, she tried to pull away. “How could you do that?”

“This is why I wanted you to leave.”

“Well, I didn’t. And I saw you torture her. How many times have you done that to her? All those scars…” She couldn’t continue and burst into tears.

He tucked her against him and she tried to fight again but he ignored her struggles and held her until the tears started to subside. In spite of her fear and anger, the warmth and strength of his big body comforted her, surrounding her with the illusion of safety.

“I didn’t leave those scars,” he said finally when she was quiet enough to listen. “Talasi was horribly abused from the time she was very, very young. She suffered so much physical pain, she never learned how to handle emotional pain. It builds up inside her until it has to have a release. If I don’t give it to her, she will try and give it to herself. When I found her, she had almost killed herself.”

“Do you like doing it?” she whispered.

“No.” He grasped her chin and raised her face to his. “But I have done many worse things and for reasons that were a lot less meaningful.”

That wasn’t exactly comforting. “Are you trying to warn me?” she asked.

Something flickered on his face but she couldn’t read it. “Perhaps.”

Cam thought back over her time with him. She had been happy with him, even though she knew what he was capable of—he had kidnapped her, killed her kidnappers, and cut off a man’s hand. Now he had whipped a woman until she bled. Why did this seem so much worse? She remembered Leeda’s words.

“It creates an intimacy,” she whispered.

“What?”

“It wasn’t sex but there was an intimacy between the two of you.” She waved at the wall. “And it was here, in our...home.”

His face tightened and she couldn’t read his expression. “You’re right,” he said finally. “No matter how desperate she was, I should have taken her away from here. And I know Talasi; I should have anticipated this and made arrangements before tonight.”

They were both quiet for a long moment.

“I’ll arrange to have her sold to someone else,” he said. Her mouth opened but he cut her off. “Before you say it, she isn’t equipped to be free. I will find someone strong enough to give her what she needs but who won’t hurt her unnecessarily.”

His words struck something inside her and the tension in her body finally started to ease. “Someone like you,” she said quietly.

“Sweetness, I already told you. I am not a good man.”

She stroked his cheek and he shut his eyes as if it hurt where she touched him.

“What would you like me to do about Sonda and Leeda?” he continued.

“What?”

He gave her a level look. “I don’t need them while I have you. They can stay if you want their company—or I can send them home.”

“You’d do that?” He nodded. “Then send them home.”

“Very well,” he agreed.

“Thank you, honey,” she whispered, and reached up to kiss him.

He stopped her. “What we have between us is still for right now,” he said. “And I will warn you again that I am not a good man.”

A sense of dread curled in her stomach but she ignored it, just as she had ignored it every time the doctor told her mother there was no hope. “For right now, you are a good man.”