Time seemed to slow as Molly made it to the halfway point between her bus stop and the roach infested, but pre-furnished, studio unit she now called home. Twice a day for the last two weeks she’d made this walk, and every time it tested her resolve. Tempted her with the shelves of shiny bottles just out of reach behind a dirty plate glass window, filled with a nectar guaranteed to help her forget about the current state of her life.

Each time she successfully beat back the urge, reminding herself that the need to escape was what got her into this situation in the first place. Winning her daily battle was a point of pride for Molly, though she knew she risked fate every day. Unfortunately, she didn’t have many options when it came to where she lived. Before she could move she needed to save up a bunch of money, enough to pay a deposit and first month’s rent, plus furnish and stock an apartment. Even if she just purchased the bare bones necessities, it would take her weeks, if not months, to save up.

She hadn’t wanted to be on her own this soon, but the women on the third floor of the halfway house hadn’t cared about anyone else when they left a candle burning after shooting up. Lisa and her friend were so high they didn’t realize that they’d knocked it over, right onto a pile of paper that quickly caught fire. They didn’t hear the fire alarms blaring or notice the overwhelming heat and smoke until it was too late for them to escape.

What Molly suspected at dinner that night was correct; both women were using again, and their bad choices caused their deaths and made the house uninhabitable. Luckily, no one else was hurt but Molly was painfully aware that her current situation was a direct result of other people being unable to fight their own urges and that knowledge was fresh in her mind.

So she forced herself onward, past the liquor store, towards her current home. The past few nights had actually gotten a little easier, but only because she swore someone was following her and the fear made her footsteps quicken.

It started Tuesday, with a fleeting moment at the end of her walk where the hair on the back of her neck stood up straight, but passed as quickly as it came. Still, she put a little extra oomph in her step, rushing to get home and behind her locked door.

Wednesday, the same thing happened, though this time it started only a few minutes after she exited the bus, but when she glanced behind her, there was no one there. Of course, it’s not like she scoured the street, searching for her stalker. People in this neighborhood didn’t like others nosing into their business so it was best to keep your head down and your eyes to yourself. Plus, someone could have been hiding in one of the alleys between buildings, or ducked into one of the storefronts. In addition to the liquor store, there was a small corner store that primarily sold cigarettes, beer and soda, a deli that had been in the area for fifty years and somehow still managed to survive and a Laundromat that Molly was certain became a hub of illegal activity after hours. Not wanting to draw attention to herself, Molly made sure she didn’t flat out run down the street, though she still made it home in record time.

Thursday, she splurged for a taxi to avoid the pouring rain that moved in that afternoon, which had the triple bonus of keeping her dry, away from the liquor store, and out of sight of her stalker. So she thought, until the cab pulled away, leaving her alone in front of the decrepit building that housed her apartment. Immediately she knew someone was watching.

Several cars were parked on the street, but with the gray clouds and pouring rain, she couldn’t tell if any of them were occupied. Not that she was going to stand there and look too hard though. After a brief sweep over all of them and not seeing anyone approaching, she turned and ran up the sidewalk to the front door. She unlocked the main door, her hands trembling so hard it took three tries to get the key in the lock. At least this building had a front door that actually locked, and did so automatically when it closed. A few she looked at in her price range did not, meaning anyone could walk in off the street and knock on her door. Just the thought terrified Molly. She knew, first hand, what kind of people hung out around here. Drug dealers and drug users, thieves and liars. Men who didn’t take no for an answer and women who would do anything at all to get their next fix. And vice versa.

Friday was the worst. The liquor store was busy with people stocking up for their weekend partying, and the convenience store had a line out the door of people cashing paychecks. From the minute she exited the bus, Molly knew someone was behind her, but fear kept her facing forward, scurrying down the sidewalk like a scared mouse. She’d almost cleared the busy plaza when her luck ran out. A hand grabbed her upper arm and dragged her around the corner of the building.

“Hey Molly, long time no see. Come here and talk to me for a minute.”

Molly instantly recognized the voice and knew exactly where this was heading. “Hey, Rodney. I don’t really have time to talk. I need to get home,” Molly said, but allowed herself to be pulled away from the sidewalk. Nobody would have helped her even if she struggled and screamed. Around here everyone would just look the other way, and besides, this conversation would have happened eventually. Though the timing was horrible.

“There she is! Molls, you’re a sight for sore eyes,” drawled Rodney after he turned her to face him. “Looks like prison agreed with you, though you packed on a few pounds.”

Molly fought the urge to roll her eyes since they both knew he was far more interested in what she had in her purse than the state of her body. “Yep, I’m doing good. All clean and sober, and healthy.”

Her calm response definitely threw him off his game, but it didn’t take long for him to regroup. “So I heard you were out and about and it jogged something in my memory.”

Molly wondered who knew she was out and told him, not that it really mattered now. The damage was done. “Yeah, what’s that?”

“I seem to remember that you owed me a bit of money when you decided to flatten yourself against the side of a building.”

Molly cringed at the reminder of just how insane she’d behaved. To this day she couldn’t fully explain her actions, other to say she’d been out of her mind after spending three days drinking and doing cocaine. She’d showed up at Keith’s house to try to get money from Sara, though she didn’t know it was his house, only that Sara had been there before. Frantic to get enough cash to pay back the seven hundred and fifty dollars she owed Rodney, when Keith pulled in the driveway with Sara in the car Molly lost her mind.

Sara looked so perfect, so right, with Keith in his shiny new truck, pulling up to his storybook little house in a far better neighborhood than Molly had ever lived in. Jealousy and anger blew through any remainder of common sense or decency she still held, and all she could focus on was making Sara as miserable as Molly. It took months of therapy for her to admit that the root of her problems was that Sara was a better person than she was. She’d made it through the loss of her parents and Molly’s constant bullying through high school, to turn into a kind and loving woman. The type of woman who helped homeless people and visited her aging grandmother at least once a week. The type of woman who would be a perfect wife and mother.

Molly knew it and accepted it, though sometimes it still burned. Though she wasn’t about to try to fix things with Sara, or Keith, now. Especially when bits and pieces of her old life could show up to haunt her at any time. Like right now.

“Oh yeah, I do remember that.” Molly finally admitted after pretending to search her memory in confusion. “How much was it? Five hundred?”

Rodney stepped forward, backing her into the cement wall of the building behind her. “Don’t play stupid Molly. It was seven fifty and you know it. Now when am I getting it back?”

Molly had already done the math in her head and was ready with an answer, though it meant she’d be eating ramen and peanut butter and jelly for the next month. “I can give you two fifty now and two fifty when I get paid again in two weeks, and the rest two weeks after that.”

Again, Rodney looked shocked at her response, but backed off and gave her another grin. “That’s better than I expected. Anything I can do for you?”

“No. I’m good.” Molly didn’t hesitate in her response for even a second. There was nothing she wanted from him, ever again. Even though giving him that much money would severely stretch her budget and prevent her from moving out of her current place for at least another month or two, she’d do it just so she’d be rid of him quicker. She reached in her purse and carefully pulled out the money, trying not to let him see how much more she had in there.

“Here,” she said, handing it over. “I’ll make another payment two weeks from today.”

Rodney eyeballed her in confusion. He definitely hadn’t been expecting her to stay strong and refuse his offer. He probably was hoping she wouldn’t be able to pay him so he could get her to make runs for him again and suck her back into the life, but it wasn’t happening. Molly wanted her shot at a normal life and she’d do anything to make it happen. Even go hungry for a while.

“All right Molls, I’ll see you in two weeks.”

Rodney turned and strolled away, leaving Molly struggling to calm her racing heart. She waited a few minutes before she exited the alley too, and headed towards home, taking deep breaths the whole way. It had taken every bit of restraint she possessed to stay calm throughout that exchange, but now that it was over she wanted to run home as fast as she could, and hide in her hovel.

By the time she reached her block she was practically running, but her haste made her miss the fact that someone was behind her until it was too late. For the second time in an hour, a hand grabbed her from behind.

“Stop!” she yelled, struggling to get away. “I told you I’d give you more in two weeks! Leave me alone!”

“Molly!” The gruff voice broke through her frenzied thrashing and she realized Rodney wasn’t the one who held her arm. It didn’t hurt, but she sure as hell wasn’t going anywhere he didn’t want. “Calm down!” he ordered, giving her no choice but to obey.

“Max,” she breathed, seeing him up close for the first time in years. He looked older, with fine lines beginning at the corners of his eyes and a hint of gray sprinkled in his goatee, but all that just made him more appealing to Molly. Taller than her by at least six inches, he hadn’t gotten the least bit soft. If anything, he’d filled out even more from when they’d been together seven years ago. Time had been kind to Max Davidson.

“What’s wrong? Why are you running and who are you paying money too?” he demanded, firing the questions off at her without letting her speak in between.

Molly tried to come up with a believable lie on the fly but couldn’t, and she didn’t want to lie to Max. That was the old Molly. The new Molly was going to be honest, even when it hurt.

“I had a run in with someone from… before. I owed him money when I got locked up, and somehow he heard I was out and came to collect.” Max’s face turned to granite as she spoke but his grip on her never tightened. He looked mad enough to kill, but she didn’t feel like his anger was directed at her.

“Did he hurt you?”

“No, I’m fine. Though he did try to entice me into going back to my old habits.”

Max tensed even more at her words and spent a long minute staring at her. He seemed to be fighting the urge to say something, but when he finally spoke all he asked was, “And?”

“And I told him no,” she replied. “I don’t want to live my life like that anymore.” She felt him relax at her response, and watched his face gradually loosen. He wasn’t smiling by any stretch of the imagination, but at least it didn’t look like he was about to crack his own jaw. What did he care anyway? Which begged the question. “What are you doing here, Max?”

Guilt crept into his eyes at her question and he quickly looked away, scanning the area around them.

“Can we go inside and talk?”

“No. Have you been following me?” Realization that she’d had two people stalking her for the past few weeks made her finally pull away and out of his grasp. “I knew someone was following me, but now I don’t know if it was you or Rodney.”

“Rodney Winters? That’s who you owe money to?” he asked, his tone demanding an answer.

“Don’t change the subject. Were you the one following me every night this week?”

He shook his head, “No, not on Monday and Tuesday. I was in my truck when you got dropped off by the cab on Wednesday, then followed you from the bus yesterday and today.”

“Shit. Then the other days must have been Rodney.”

“Let me inside so you can tell me about this asshole, Molly.”

“No, you’re not getting involved. I’ll clean up my own mess,” she retorted. “And you’re not coming into my apartment. Why do you even care anyway?”

“I’m keeping an eye on you for Sara,” he answered, but something about the way he said it made her wonder if it was the truth. “I’ve become friends with her and Keith.”

“Well, I’m home now,” she gestured to her building two doors down. “You can go.”

“This neighborhood sucks, Molly. You need to find a better place to live.” Scorn twisted his face, making her rethink her earlier assessment.

“Thanks, Detective, for enlightening me about the state of my neighborhood. I couldn’t tell it was shitty from the hookers and drug dealers on the street at night.” She got right in his face, sarcasm dripping off of every word. “Let me just run to the bank and get a few thousand dollars so I can get a nicer place and furnish it with all things I need that I don’t have.”

He stepped back at the venom in her voice, but she’d made her point. “I’m sorry. I didn’t think about that.”

“Yeah, you thought that I’d choose to live here. Thanks.” Molly turned and walked away, done talking to him. Who did he think he was anyway? He’d tossed her out on her ass years ago and now he thought he could come in and tell her how to live her life. No freaking way.

Steps echoed from behind her, making her hurry along. Not that she had any hope of outrunning him. “Max, go away. I’m fine,” Molly called over her shoulder, not slowing down.

He didn’t respond but he was still back there, following her. What the hell did he want from her after all these years? Was he trying to torture her by showing up back in her life? It was bad enough he was at the scene of the accident and could see for himself just how far she’d fallen.

She reached her front door and jammed the key in the lock, hoping to sneak in and slam the door closed before he caught up. As she pushed the door open and slid through, a large hand stopped it from closing behind her. “Wait, Molly, I just want to talk to you. Please let me in. I don’t like standing out here on the street.”

“Why do you want to come inside so badly? Are you embarrassed to be seen with me?” He grimaced in response to her harsh accusation, which only proved her point. “Wouldn’t want to ruin your reputation, now would we?”

He didn’t say anything else. Just stood there with an intractable stare that let her know he wasn’t giving in anytime soon. She tried to wait him out, she really did, but one of the other residents of the building came up the front walk and they both would have to move to let the elderly gentleman inside.

“Fine. Come up, but only for five minutes,” Molly found herself saying, wondering what had come over her even as she led him upstairs. She could feel the disgust rolling off him in waves, increasing as they ascended the stairs, stepping around a passed out drunk who lived on the floor above Molly but hadn’t managed to make the climb. Fast food garbage and empty beer bottles littered the hallway, lit only by a few bare hanging bulbs. They made their way to her front door with Max crowding her ever closer with each step.

“At least you’ve got a good lock on your door,” Max said in her ear. Molly jumped, not realizing he was so close.

“Yeah, I bought it myself and paid the landlord extra to install in when I moved in. No way was I going to use the old one, not knowing who could possibly have keys.”

They entered the small space and Max immediately began looking around. Not that there was much to see. A two seat couch she’d covered in a colorful, used bedsheet she picked up from the thrift store faced a battered wood coffee table that held a television that had been state of the art fifteen years ago, but it worked. The same couldn’t be said for the dishwasher in the small kitchenette that took up the back wall of the room. It also contained an apartment size stove and fridge, a small sink and four cupboards. A twin sized bed sat against the opposite wall, with a dresser at the foot that held her meager wardrobe. Everything was used and abused, much like Molly herself, but she’d tried to liven it up as much as her budget allowed. She’d found a new comforter set on clearance at the big box store by her work, along with a few new dishes and silverware. Cheery curtains that matched the bedding were also on sale, so she’d picked those up as well. A pretty vase and a few knick-knacks from the thrift store were only a few dollars and helped to make the space look like an actual home instead of a flophouse.

At least it was clean, she made sure of that. The chipped counters didn’t have a single crumb on them anywhere. Not that she’d waste a crumb of anything these days.

It wasn’t fancy, or even close to nice, but it was all hers. And since it included basic cable and all utilities she only needed to pay the rent. Unfortunately, that took up almost half of her bi-weekly pay, and then she needed bus fare and food money too. She’d been trying to set money aside to move into somewhere better, but now that she had to pay Rodney back, it was going to take forever. She sighed, knowing she’d better get used to calling this place home sweet home.

Max hadn’t said a word yet, so she risked a glance at his face, which she’d been intentionally avoiding, not wanting to see what he thought of her place. What she found was exactly what she expected—judgment and disgust.

“I know it’s not much but it’s all I can afford. Now what do you want?” She faced him, crossing her arms and steeling herself for whatever was about to come out of his mouth. She didn’t hold out much hope that it would be anything good, but you never knew.

It took him a long time to answer, and when he did she found out exactly what he thought of her. “I’m worried about you, Molly. You were released way too early and I don’t want you to relapse.”

Indignation rose hot and fast, making her blood boil at his words. Even though she had the same worries when she lay alone in bed at night. “I’m fine. I told you I turned down Rodney just a few minutes ago. I don’t need your concern.”

“I saw you looking at the liquor store last night on your way home. I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to live so close to so much temptation.”

“Again, why do you even care? You threw me out without a backward glance years ago. I know I’m not good enough for you so just get out of here and forget all about me.” Rage had her voice rising, but her neighbors wouldn’t care. His words hurt, but she couldn’t show him that, she needed to blanket her pain in anger.

“I can’t do that, Molly,” he replied evenly. “It’s my fault your life fell apart, and I don’t believe that you’re going to be able to stay clean. In fact, did you buy booze tonight? I lost track of you for a few minutes and I thought you went into the convenience store, but maybe you went into the liquor store instead?”

How dare he stand there, in her house, making these accusations! “You’re an asshole! Get out!” she screeched, pointing to the door.

“It’s not like you have the greatest history of telling the truth, Molly. We were living together, for fucks sake, and you never told me how old you were.” He sneered at her, stepping into her personal space.

“You never asked!” she yelled, repeating what she’d told him at the time. Age had honestly never come up, and she just assumed he knew how old she was from his friend. It wasn’t like she hid it. “I was nineteen and in love. I didn’t think it would even matter.”

“You need help, Molly. You shouldn’t be on your own.” His words cut her like a knife, though she shouldn’t have expected anything else. The time they spent together obviously meant nothing to him. She was just a lying druggie who couldn’t take care of herself.

“I’m glad I now know what you really think of me, Max,” she whispered, struggling to find a calm she didn’t really feel but unwilling to waste any more emotion on him. “Thank you for your concern but I can take care of myself. I will be fine, and I don’t need anyone who doesn’t believe in me offering to help. Now get out.”

Molly stalked to the door and whipped it open, holding it wide so he could leave. He opened his mouth to say something else, but she cut him off with a glare and a shaking finger pointing the way out. If she hadn’t been so angry and hurt she might have seen the guilt and sorrow that wracked Max’s normally hard face, but she was barely holding her tears at bay.

So she didn’t notice that he had to force himself to walk away without pulling her towards him in a crushing hug. And she certainly didn’t see that he spent the next three hours sitting outside her house making sure that he hadn’t pushed her right into the very place he was trying to protect her from.