Axel hurried from the department store, his neck hot and his heart twisting painfully. For three months, he’d been thinking about the girl he’d given the lacrosse ball to, wishing she would call or text, but knowing she probably wouldn’t. She’d told him right up front she was in a “committed relationship.” How he hated those words. It was the only thing she’d said that day that he hated.

She’d been perfect, absolutely perfect, to him. She looked like an angel with her blonde hair, dark blue eyes, and delicate facial features, but it wasn’t just her looks that drew him. There was something in her eyes when she met his gaze, something so sweet and pure he just wanted to be close to her, to have a chance to talk to her and get to know her. It was like some chick movie his mom used to make him watch where the guy sees the girl and he just knows she’s the one for him. Did that even happen in real life? The connection to her sure felt real.

He’d thought a lot about how he could approach her without coming on too strong. All the chick flick movies his mom forced on him and his brother as teenagers to try to make them “sensitive” had given him plenty of ideas to approach her. He had finally decided on the plan to give away the ball with his signature and phone number on it. His coach had agreed to it, thinking it was just another PR stunt his sponsor or agent had dreamt up. Nobody but him knew that he’d been stealing glances at the girl all season and his dreams of meeting her were finally coming to fruition.

It had all backfired on him. His stomach twisted just thinking about it.

The past few months had been busy with the regular season and then playoffs, but he still thought about his blonde angel much too often and wondered why she stopped coming to his games, certain his misguided romantic idea had driven her away. As soon as the playoffs were over, he’d started to travel and put on youth lacrosse camps. They were a lot of fun and made his sponsors and agent happy, especially when the young people and their parents blasted his picture and their products all over the internet.

Axel was in Echo Ridge in upstate New York for the next week and a half and had camp every morning from eight to noon, except Sunday. The high school lacrosse coach had invited him and taken care of the signups and organization. Axel always gave the proceeds to the local lacrosse program, so it worked out well for everyone.

He’d showered after camp today at the bed and breakfast then walked the streets of downtown, eating a great lunch at Fay’s Café before wandering into Kenworth’s. Seeing his dream girl there had about bowled him over. He’d been ecstatic. He was finally going to talk to her, make another connection with her, get her to see the real him. Until the guy had picked her up, hugging and kissing her like he owned rights to her. Axel’s hand balled into a fist. There didn’t seem to be anything wrong with the guy—well-built, longer reddish-blond hair, a big smile—other than existing. The man was obviously the one in a committed relationship with Axel’s dream woman.

He sighed and walked past a veteran’s memorial. There was a small lake up ahead. He headed in that direction. Unfortunately, he had hours to kill until the barbecue at Coach Chayton Liechty’s tonight. Wandering around town might be the only entertainment he had.

The coach’s daughters had both been at the camp. The older one hardly wanted to hold a lacrosse stick, turning up her nose at him when he suggested she kneel down and try the faceoff. The younger one was a lacrosse lover through and through. Axel thought they were both great. He was excited to meet Chayton’s wife and his older son, who was playing at Syracuse. Lacrosse families were always fun to be around.

He saw a sign for Ruby Mountain Resort and headed that direction, hiking up the road for a bit and past a scenic lake with a few cabins dotting the shoreline. He found a hiking trail that eventually led him to a great overlook. He found himself fantasizing about hiking with his angel’s hand in his. It would never happen, but it sure sounded nice. He’d dated plenty of women throughout high school, college, and the last couple of years playing for the Lizards, but he was alone more often than not. His mom claimed he was too driven like his father. She said he couldn’t slow down long enough to develop a real relationship. Life had been busy in high school and college. Being a student athlete at Duke was no walk in the park, especially not with his drive to achieve a four point oh. He had also graduated with a master’s degree in financial economics before committing to play for the Lizards.

He had his teammates, along with some high school and college friends he still kept in touch with. His parents and little brother lived on Long Island, so he saw them often, but when he had downtime like right now, how alone he was hit him pretty hard.

He gazed out over the picturesque valley, the mountains filled with pine and aspen trees, and the little town laid out like a postcard. He liked this area. Did his dream girl live here? Maybe she was a student at Hofstra and that was why she’d come to his games for a while.

Shoving a hand through his hair, he hurried back down the trail and toward town. A couple of hours later he’d showered again and was in his Lexus LX following Siri’s voice to Chayton’s house for the barbecue. The hosting coaches always welcomed him into their homes, and it felt good to be part of a family like that.

Siri beeped that he had arrived at his location. He glanced around the older neighborhood with its perfectly-mowed lawns and seventies-style boxy houses. The house seemed too small for Chayton and his family, but it looked well-kept and homey. The front porch was wide and adorned with wooden rockers and hanging flower baskets. Axel felt that bit of longing he hid from everyone, especially his mother. Chayton had it all—a beautiful family, a cozy house and neighborhood, and a job coaching a high school team. Someday, maybe this could be Axel’s life, but it wasn’t his time yet.

He strode up to the porch and rapped on the front door. A few moments later, it swung open, and a petite blonde lady with a chubby baby on her hip smiled brightly at him. “Axel Olson! I don’t think you’ll ever know how excited we are to have you here.”

He grinned. “Thank you.” He loved his fans.

“My Maryn has posters of you on every wall of her room.”

Axel chuckled. “I met Maryn today. She’s great.”

“Too bad she wasn’t born a boy.” Chayton’s wife wrinkled her nose. “Did she give you her speech about how they need to change the rules for girl’s lacrosse so she can really hit somebody?”

“She did.”

The baby had a full head of dark hair and the biggest brown eyes. He leaned from his mom’s arms toward Axel. Axel opened his hands, and the little guy reached for him.

“Oh, sorry. Jude loves big men.”

“It’s great.”

She let the baby go, and Axel hefted him in his arms. “How does your momma carry you around, big guy?”

“He’s huge, right? I’m Emma by the way.”

“Axel.”

“I knew that.” She gave him a charming smile. Chayton truly was a blessed man with a beautiful wife and children. He wondered if there was a story though. Chayton was obviously of Native American descent and the baby looked a lot like him, but their girls were as blonde as their momma. They each had her distinctive deep brown eyes too.

“Let’s get you out back so Maryn and Mason can get their fill of you.”

Axel knew their older son was starting his junior year at Syracuse in the fall. He wondered if they’d gotten married as teenagers as Emma looked really young. He followed her through the main living area. It was small but clean with hardwood floors, tan leather furniture, and bright light coming in from the windows. They went out a backdoor off the kitchen. The backyard was nice with large trees and lots of berry bushes and toys. Chayton was at a smoking barbecue grill. He spotted them immediately, his eyes softening on his wife before focusing on Axel.

“There he is!” He strode over to shake Axel’s hand. “Thanks for coming.”

“Thanks for having me.” He squeezed Jude’s chubby leg. “The little man and I are buddies now.”

Chayton grinned. “Best thing in the world being a dad. You’ve got to meet my son, Mason, and his girlfriend, Kaitlyn. They’re both huge fans. Kaitlyn lives in the city and always went to your games.”

Axel’s eyes swung around the yard, finding a couple sitting on a patio swing on the opposite side. They each had a little girl on their lap, and the man had his arm around the woman. Axel’s jaw unhinged as he caught his first glimpse of the woman’s face. Petite features, blue eyes, and that beautiful blonde hair. She looked just like the most recent Cinderella that his mom had insisted he watch with her a couple of years ago.

It was her, his angel, and the man hugging her was the same one he’d seen her with at Kenworth’s today. His stomach twisted. Life was cruel sometimes.

The man stood, holding Addison in his arms. Addison was probably eight, but petite and the man was big enough she looked tiny in his arms. Maryn scrambled off of Axel’s angel’s lap and rushed across the lawn, throwing herself against Axel’s legs. “You came!” She beamed up at him.

Chayton chuckled and ruffled his daughter’s hair. He held out his arms, and baby Jude was transferred to his dad so Axel could bend down and pick up Maryn. He tossed the little girl in the air, and she squealed in delight.

“You’re my favorite player ever!” She screamed, throwing her arms around his neck and planting a kiss on his cheek.

Axel savored it. Children could make everything better. His eyes lifted to the beautiful blonde approaching him, sadly still stuck to her boyfriend’s side. The guy set Addison down and extended his hand. “Mason Turner. It’s so great to meet you, sir.”

Axel processed it quickly, so Mason wasn’t Chayton’s son, but none of them seemed to care, which he thought was great. He shifted Maryn to his left side and grasped Mason’s hand. He couldn’t find anything to fault about the kid—from his large smile to his well-built body. In fact, he looked like a player Axel would want to have on his team and probably hang out with after practice as well. Why couldn’t her boyfriend be a loser?

“You too. Chayton says you play defense for Syracuse?”

“Yes, sir.” He released Axel’s hand and wrapped his arm around the angel’s waist. “Kaitlyn is a huge fan of yours too. She went to all of your games last spring.” He beamed down at her. “This is your surprise.”

Axel was her surprise? He hoped he was a good one. He extended his hand. She really had no choice but to place hers in it. He marveled at the feel of her small hand. It fit perfectly, and all kinds of possessive and longing feelings rushed over him.

He arched an eyebrow and studied her, unable to resist saying, “That’s why you look so familiar.”

Her cheeks turned red, and she pulled her hand back. She dipped her head and pulled her lower lip between her teeth for half a second before saying, “You probably noticed my roommate, Lolly. She always made me sit in the front row and screamed like crazy for you.”

“So, you only came for Lolly’s sake?” Her sweet shyness and biting her lip like that made him long to shove Mason out of the way.

Mason tugged her closer to him, grinning. “She went for me. I’ve turned her into a lacrosse junky.”

Kaitlyn smiled sweetly at Mason. Her eyes swung back to Axel, and her cheeks got even darker. Axel hated to admit that they were a perfect-looking couple, both blonde and beautiful and seemingly nice people. He suddenly wanted to get out of this backyard more than he wanted to beat the Denver Outlaws for the national title next year.

Maryn squeezed his neck and pulled his concentration away from Mr. and Mrs. Perfect. “Tell me about the time you broke three guy’s ankles and scored over Denver’s goalie. He’s the best in the nation!”

Axel couldn’t help but laugh. “What do you know about breaking ankles?”

She gave him a disgusted look. “I know everything about lacrosse.”

Everyone chuckled, and he relaxed a little bit. Maryn was exactly what he needed to get through this night without asking his angel, er Kaitlyn, why she’d never called and why she had to have a boyfriend. He’d concentrate on Maryn and try to keep his eyes from straying to the blonde beauty that was ripping him up inside without even meaning to.

Kaitlyn pulled her gaze from Axel and her hand from Mason’s grip, grateful for the excuse to carry leftovers inside and help Emma cleanup. Tonight had been horrible. She’d done all she could to not stare at Axel. Then she had wondered if that made it even more obvious she had a monstrous crush on the all-star, and she’d been completely uncomfortable with Mason touching her and being so nice to her like he always was. This was a nightmare, and it was all her fault. Why, oh why, did both Mason and Axel have to be so fabulous? Why couldn’t she get Axel, who she hardly knew, out of her head, and keep Mason, who she’d committed to years ago, there?

“You doing okay, sweetie?” Emma asked as they scooped leftovers into plastic containers. Emma was a fabulous cook but always made way too much. Kaitlyn knew that not too long ago Emma and Mason hadn’t had enough food and she loved seeing Emma be able to overfeed her family.

“Um, sure, yeah, well, I kind of have a headache.” Kaitlyn fumbled with what to say that wouldn’t make it obvious she was a complete mess.

Emma looked at her far too perceptively. She gave her a quick hug and said, “I know it’s hard. You and Mace have just had the summer together, and now he’s heading back to school.”

Okay, luckily Emma wasn’t as perceptive as Kaitlyn feared.

The back door burst open, and Axel’s large frame filled it. The oxygen sucked out of Kaitlyn’s lungs, and she had to grip the counter to stay upright. His dark eyes swept over her before he focused on Emma. “Maryn fell. She needs you.”

Emma ran for the back door, hurrying past Axel. “Thanks.”

Axel nodded and then turned back to focus on Kaitlyn. Maryn’s cries rent the evening air. How had she not noticed that before? She’d better get out there and check on her little friend. She loved Maryn and Addison so much. Heck, she loved the entire family. She allowed herself to look directly at Axel, and the world seemed to tilt. Why, oh why, did she have to have these stupid feelings about a man who would never be reality when the man she was supposed to be with was right outside?

She looked away from Axel’s dark eyes and hurried to brush past him. “Excuse me,” she muttered.

Axel reached out and touched her arm. He didn’t grasp it or pull her to a stop or anything, but his magnetism yanked her back all the same. Her legs stopped moving, and she unconsciously leaned toward him. He smelled like the most intriguing mixture of some kind of musk, with amber undertones and lime. She inhaled, savoring it.

Maryn’s cries had settled, but Kaitlyn was certain she wouldn’t have heard a cartoon bomb whistle by overhead as Axel leaned close and whispered, “Do you still have the ball?”

Kaitlyn’s eyes flew to his. The warm touch of his hand on her arm was doing funny things to her stomach, or maybe it was his scent, or maybe it was the way he looked at her, like an eight-year old at his first major league lacrosse game.

“Yes.” She couldn’t lie to him, and her insides jumped for joy with the confirmation that he’d remembered, even though he’d said nothing about the ball earlier.

Axel grinned and removed his hand. “Think you’ll ever use it?”

Kaitlyn took a quick breath. “Do you think you deserve to be that blessed?” It was a lot sassier than she wanted to be with him, but she needed him to back off or she was going to fling herself into his arms. Then Mason’s entire family would witness how fickle and uncommitted she’d become since Axel Olson had handed her that ball three months ago.

“I don’t know that any man deserves that, but I’ve been hoping.” He gave her a devastating smile.

Kaitlyn was caught up in his gaze and everything in the world fell away but the two of them.

“Kaitlyn, you okay?” Mason’s voice yanked her back to reality.

She whipped away from Axel and took three steps to Mason’s side. He wrapped an arm around her. Solid, steady, and good—that was Mason. “I’ve got a pretty bad headache,” she said.

“I’ll take you home.” Mason nodded to Axel as they walked past him through the house. Kaitlyn couldn’t allow herself to look at the superstar again. He was unattainable, unrealistic, lived in an alternate reality, yet none of that had mattered when he’d smiled at her moments ago.

Suddenly, she stopped. “Wait. Is Maryn okay?”

“She’s fine.” Mason reassured her, squeezing her waist. “She just needed a little mom attention.”

Kaitlyn forced a smile in return. “Tell her I’ll bring her a treat tomorrow.”

“I will.”

They reached the front door and walked out onto the porch. Kaitlyn hadn’t let herself look back, but somehow, she knew Axel’s eyes had been on her the entire time they walked away. The headache wasn’t a lie, but it was self-induced because of the irresistible pull toward Axel that she kept trying to fight.

Mason escorted her to his Ford Explorer and helped her inside. It was parked next to Axel’s silver Lexus sport utility. She couldn’t escape thinking about him. It was like he was everywhere she looked. Even if there was no chance of getting to know Axel better, she needed to talk to Mason about their relationship or she was going to go crazy.

They were both quiet on the drive up the hill to her house. Mason was quick to run around and get her door, walking her up the steps with his broad arm slung around her back. Memories started rushing back to her, like this was the last time they would ever do this and she needed to savor it.

“Remember the first time you walked me to my door?” she asked.

Mason let out a surprised laugh. “I don’t think I’ll ever forget. Chelsea drove us here in Chayton’s truck.”

She smiled wistfully. “You protected me from Gabe.”

He grinned at her. “The kiss you gave me was worth fighting Gabe and his buddies.”

They stopped outside her front door. Kaitlyn remembered that kiss too, the sweetness and excitement of it. They’d been so innocent, and she’d idolized him. Why couldn’t they go back there?

He looked over her eight-foot tall front door and the columned front porch. “I used to be so intimidated by your parents and this house.”

“I know, but you shouldn’t have been. You’re going to do great things, Mace.”

He cocked his head to the side, appraising her with his clear blue eyes.

Kaitlyn shifted her weight and could hardly hold his gaze. This conversation was a long time coming, but she kept second-guessing even initiating it. Why did doing the right thing have to be so tough?

“Why do I feel like you’re saying goodbye?” Mason asked quietly.

Kaitlyn dipped her head and bit at her lip.

Mason gently tilted up her chin. “I love it when you do that.”

“Oh, Mason.” She shook her head, tears stinging the corners of her eyes.

“Hey. What’s going on?” He tugged her against his strong chest.

Kaitlyn rested her forehead on his shoulder. He smelled like clean laundry detergent and man. How in the world could she write off this good, solid man that she had so much history with for someone she didn’t even know? Probably someone she didn’t even have a chance with. But just as quickly as she thought that, she pictured Axel’s dark eyes as he asked her if she still had the ball. That stupid, traitorous ball!

Mason pulled back slightly, and she glanced up at him. “What’s going on, Kait?”

“I feel like things are … comfortable between us.”

He gave her his slow, easy grin that used to make her legs go to gush. “And that’s a bad thing?”

“No, but yeah.” She shook her head. “I know that things aren’t always going to be fireworks and sparks, but it’s almost like we’re siblings or really great friends. When you kiss me, it’s … nothing like it used to be.” She winced as she said that, but he deserved the truth.

Mason stared at her. Kaitlyn was waiting for him to maybe kiss her and prove her wrong or something, but he just stared. “Do you want to be done?” His voice sounded resigned, like he’d known this was coming.

Kaitlyn pulled all the way out of his arms. This was hard, and she wasn’t ready to be done with Mason, with his friendship, yet this needed to be said. They needed to either work through this slump in their relationship or move on and date other people.

“Maybe.” She met his gaze, and the sadness there ripped at her. “You’re one of my best friends, Mace, but if you think about it, neither of us have really dated anyone else. Since junior year of high school, it’s always been us.”

He swallowed, and she watched his Adam’s apple bob. She glanced back at his handsome face. He was every bit as handsome as Axel.

“What can I do, Kait?”

She closed her eyes. He was so great, and she was a complete jerk, but now that they were talking, she felt like she had to say this. She had to try this. “I think we need to date other people.”

Mason flinched like she’d slapped him. “Is there someone particular you want to date?”

“Maybe.” She swallowed hard. “Yeah.”

“Where’d you meet him?” His blue eyes darkened, and his hand clenched into a fist.

“In the city.” Should she tell him it was Axel? No. That would be stupid. It was her fantasizing about Axel that had initiated this conversation, but now that they were having it, even though it was awful, it felt like it was past time to do something about their lackluster relationship. She didn’t want to just stay with him because it was the plan. Mason deserved better than that and so did she. “Come on, Mace, I’m sure you have girls begging for a smile from you at Syracuse.” Why did that not bother her? It should, it really should.

His brow furrowed. “So what?”

“Haven’t you ever wondered what it would be like to kiss someone besides me?” Axel’s dark good looks flashed through her mind, but she forced them out quickly. This wasn’t about Axel. It was about her and Mason. If they could ever have a future, they both needed to be sure this wasn’t just a default relationship because they’d always been together.

He rubbed his right palm on the side of his pants. “I can’t believe we’re having this conversation.”

Kaitlyn looked away. She hated that she was hurting him, but wouldn’t it be worse to never question anything, get married after they graduated, not be happy, and maybe get divorced or just be miserable and never admit it?

“How long have you been feeling like this?” Mason asked quietly.

“Pretty much all last year.”

He pushed a hand through his longish hair. “That’s why you’ve been kind of off with me all summer.”

“I’m sorry, Mace.” He’d noticed. Aw, crap.

A few long seconds passed. Then he muttered, “You think dating other people is going to help us somehow?”

“Maybe. Either we’ll realize we want to be together, or we’ll want to move on.” Oh, that sounded so heartless. This was not a fun conversation to have with someone you cared about.

Mason tenderly touched her cheek. Kaitlyn couldn’t resist leaning into his large palm.

“I’ll do whatever you want, Kait. I hate the idea of you dating anyone else, but I hate the thought of us getting married and either one of us second-guessing if it was right even more, you know?”

Kaitlyn smiled tremulously at him, grateful for him and his understanding.

He gave her a quick peck and then pulled her close again. Kaitlyn drew from his strength but realized the hug and the short kiss just reaffirmed what she was saying. Friendship, kindness, and strength were what she felt from and for Mason. She wondered if he was relieved or upset. He didn’t say anything, which was so like him too. Always the strong, silent type.

He released her, and she pushed on the front door handle. The door swung inward, light and air conditioning spilling out.

“I’m going to be helping Chayton with camp and some house projects tomorrow,” he said, “but could we go to Jack’s tomorrow night?”

“Sure.” She gave him a smile. He’d be gone Sunday, and she wouldn’t see him again until Thanksgiving, unless they both came back for Homecoming Weekend like they had last year.

“Do you care if we don’t tell my family until we know which direction we’re going?” He blew out a breath. “They all love you so much.”

It was a stab in the gut. Mason’s family. She loved them like they were her own. She was fine with waiting to say something to them. Maybe all her worries about her and Mason’s relationship and desire for Axel would blow over; and Mason’s family would never know they’d gone through this bumpy stretch.

“Sure.”

He nodded to her, not going for a kiss or even a hug as she slipped inside. She leaned against the door, feeling drained of all strength. This was much harder than she’d ever imagined it would be, yet at the same time, she felt relief. It was like she’d been wearing her favorite pair of running shoes for too long and they were causing overuse injuries and she’d finally forced herself to donate them to Goodwill. It had always just been Mason for her. The future right now seemed wide open, but also kind of empty. She’d done the right thing, so why did it hurt so much?