[21]

Steven left the waiting room and made his way back to Duncan O’Brien’s. Haley decided she’d better stay with McCort. And besides, she’d said, she didn’t want to leave and take a chance on missing the doctor when he came out to talk to the family. Namely her. So he’d left her texting someone at the teen center about the trip that had been moved up to Friday.

Steven flashed his ID to the officer still on the door, then knocked.

“Come in.”

He pushed the door open and stepped inside.

Duncan still looked pale, but his eyes were bright. “Back already?” He frowned. “Is Mr. Burke all right?”

“He hasn’t woken up yet, but I’m assuming he’s still all right.” He settled in the chair next to Duncan so the man didn’t have to strain his neck looking up at him. “I have a question for you.”

“Of course.”

“What was the name of the man you hired to find Haley?”

“Gerald Forsythe, my cousin. He’s a police officer.”

Steven blew out a low breath. “I see. When was the last time you heard from him?”

“Shortly before I arrived. We arranged for him to leave the rental car at the airport for me. I wired him the final payment and that was it. Why?”

“I’m sorry to tell you this, but he’s dead.”

Duncan blanched. “What?”

“I’m really sorry.”

“Oh, it can’t be so.” He raised a hand and covered his eyes for a brief moment. “He has a family.”

“They’ve been notified.”

“Tell me what happened.”

Steven did, then waited a few more minutes to let the man process the news. “Are you going to be all right?” he finally asked. “I want to get back to Haley.”

“I’ll be all right. I prefer to be alone right now anyway.” He cleared his throat. “Ye’ll let me know how Mr. Burke is?”

“Absolutely. And . . . again, I’m really sorry about your cousin.”

“Thank you.”

Steven left and made his way back to the waiting area, where he found Haley and McCort speaking with the doctor. Haley glanced at him and shook her head. Steven’s heart sank. Had he died? He stepped closer. “We’ll keep him comfortable, but if he has any other family, you should notify them.”

“Of course,” Haley whispered.

Hugh simply looked stunned, his face a mask of harsh regret. “It can’t be so,” he said. “There’s no hope he’ll wake up?”

“It’s possible he’ll wake up and surprise us all,” the doctor said. “As far as I can see, everything looks fine with his brain despite the tumor. The tumor itself looks very small and will need to be biopsied at some point if he wishes to do so.”

“So the tumor caused his seizure?”

“Yes, that’s what it looks like.”

Haley planted her hands on her hips. “Doctor, what’s wrong with him? Why won’t he wake up?”

He drew in a breath and spread his hands. “I’m not sure, to be honest. His vitals are good, but he’s not responding to stimuli. Let’s just watch him for a while.”

“So he’s in a coma?”

The doctor hesitated. “I’m not sure I’d call it a coma. Yet. Let’s just give him some time and see what happens. Of course, at his age—”

“Of course,” Hugh murmured. “You really think I should call the family?”

“I would, just to be on the cautious side. Like I said, at his age, you never know.”

Haley turned to Hugh. “You know who to contact, of course?”

“I do.”

“Then I’ll leave that to you.”

Steven shook his head. What had happened in the last few days? How had he become embroiled in such a mess? A mess he had no intention of letting Haley go through alone. He watched her struggle to contain her emotions and process the news.

And how had he come to care about her so much in such a short period of time?

It didn’t matter. They’d been through some intense times together. Times that had brought them closer than the average dinner-and-a-movie date would have.

While Hugh got on his phone, swiping a stray tear in the process, Steven pulled Haley to the side. “Forsythe is the man Duncan hired to track you down. They were cousins.”

She didn’t even blink. “All right then, at least that’s one question answered. And we know the people you’re after haven’t struck again.”

“No, but it’s getting close to the time that they will.” He raked a hand over his head. “We’ll worry about that in a bit.”

“What’s next on your agenda?”

“I need to check on Zeke’s mother, then figure out a way to catch the killers before they strike again.”

Katie appeared in the doorway and Haley waved her over. She approached, her eyes roving. They settled on Hugh McCort, then bounced back to her. “How is everything?”

“Interesting. I’m ready for boring.”

Katie slid into the chair beside her. “I talked to Quinn. The bullets from the man in the trunk and the one they dug out of Carter James match.”

“I figured they would,” Haley murmured. “Has Quinn been able to talk to Carter?”

Katie shook her head. “They’re keeping him sedated for now. He has quite a bit of swelling on his brain.”

Hugh cleared his throat and Steven raised a brow at the man. He tucked his phone into his pocket. “The family is on the way.”

“Who?” Haley asked.

“Not all of them, of course, but five of them you’ll get to meet.”

Haley’s half-stunned, half-panicked expression tugged at him. Steven reached out and closed his hand around hers. He figured she was feeling a bit shell-shocked at the fact that she was going to meet her family in a few hours.

“I’m supposed to be getting on a bus to New York in a few days.” He released her hand and she sank into the chair. “What do I do? I can’t leave and I can’t not leave.”

“You don’t have to worry about that yet. Let’s give your grandfather some time to wake up.”

She gave a slow nod. “You’re right.” She stood and rubbed her palms down her jeans. “I want to see him.”

Haley’s brain spun and she paused at the door to her grandfather’s room. Members of her family were coming in from Ireland. And she would meet them all. Overwhelmed didn’t come close to describing the emotion running through her. There was also a mixture of excitement and curiosity.

Her grandfather lay still in the ICU bed. She walked to his bedside while a nurse typed something into the computer. “How is he?” Haley asked.

“It’s hard to say. He’s the same as before, really. He just needs to wake up.”

Haley reached for his hand and curled her fingers around his. “Hi, Daideo,” she whispered.

His fingers flexed and Haley jumped. “He just squeezed my hand.”

The nurse turned and pulled the stethoscope from around her neck to insert the ends into her ears. She listened to his chest, then straightened. “It’s possible it was just a muscle spasm.” She glanced at the heart monitor. “His heart rate is up a bit, though. Keep talking to him. He might be able to hear you.”

Haley kept her grip on the man’s hand. “Daideo, I need you to wake up. Maybe it’s selfish, but I’m not ready for you to go on to heaven. I just met you and I want to get to know you more.” This time her words produced no response. “I have something I really need to talk to you about too.” She sighed. “Anyway, apparently our entire family is on the way to see you and I’ll admit, I’m a wee bit nervous.”

Still no response. She reached behind her to pull the chair next to his bed and sat down. Still holding his hand, she rested her head on the mattress and closed her eyes.

Haley had no idea how long she slept, but the sun climbing into the sky and peeking through the blinds awakened her. She looked into her grandfather’s face and was disappointed to see that he appeared the same as he had last night.

“Haley?”

She turned to see Steven in the doorway. “Hey.”

“You okay?”

“I think so. What did I miss?”

“Nothing too exciting, thank goodness. It’s been quiet.”

“Have you been here the whole time?”

He shook his head. “I went to the office, then home and got a shower, talked to my dad a bit, and came back about thirty minutes ago.”

“Did you tell Quinn about McCort?”

“I did.”

She stretched gently, wincing at the pull of the stitches still in her side. “How’s it healing?”

“It’s fine. It only hurts when I move wrong. Which includes stretching. How’s Hugh?”

Steven settled into the window seat. “Still beating himself up. He’s very sad.”

“I expect so.”

“Why don’t you hate him? He could have stopped the murder of your family if he had just said something to your grandfather or the police.”

“Hold that thought.” She rubbed her eyes and stood to walk to the sink. One glance in the mirror had her regretting that she’d looked. She grimaced and rinsed her mouth, then drank her fill from the sink. Haley pulled the hair tie from the ponytail and ran her fingers through her hair. Once she had the ponytail redone, she felt halfway human again. “Want to walk down to the cafeteria? I’m starving.”

“Sure.”

She walked out of the room and Steven followed her. Once they were seated at the table with food in front of them and, most importantly, coffee, she took a swig of the dark liquid and let out a little sigh. “Okay. In answer to your question, I don’t hate him because I can’t. I’ve come to realize that we’re all human, Steven. We make mistakes, we have moments of bad judgment, but it doesn’t mean we’re evil people. It just means—” she tilted her head and offered a slight shrug—“we’re human.”

“So you’re okay with him keeping his mouth shut?”

“Of course not,” she snapped. Then took a deep breath. How did she explain? “Do I wish he’d made a different choice? Of course I do. But he didn’t. Sometimes you know the right thing to do, but you hold off doing it out of fear or with the thought that you’re protecting someone—or something. Whatever the reason, you don’t act and someone gets hurt—or dies because of it.”

“Who died on your watch?” he asked softly. “What mistake did you make?”

She flinched, glanced at the clock, and then back to her half-eaten breakfast. She pushed it away, not hungry anymore. “When I was with G2, I found out another operative was going to retire. He was tired of the game, but he was determined to finish his last assignment. I tried to talk him out of it because I knew there was something wrong with him. He insisted he was fine. He told me to back off, pushed past me, and said he had to catch a bus home. I reminded him that he’d driven to the office. That morning, we’d spoken and walked into the building together. He froze, got on the elevator, and went down to the parking garage. I followed him a few minutes later and found him wandering the garage looking for his car.”

“Dementia?” Steven asked softly.

“Sudden-onset Alzheimer’s. But I didn’t know that until later. He admitted he was stressed out and some things going on at home had him not thinking clearly. I found his car for him and he drove off. Still not feeling right about the whole thing, I searched his office.”

“Whoa.”

She rubbed her eyes and drew in a deep breath. “I know it sounds awful, but I worked with him. Lives depended on him being able to do the job. If there was something going on that would hinder his abilities, I needed to know it. Anyway, I found a medical file and it had his diagnosis in it. I took the file, went to his home, and confronted him. He was furious and even took a swing at me. Once he calmed down, I told him I was going to let our handler know that he wasn’t fit for duty. He broke down, made me promise not to say anything. He also promised to go to our supervisor first thing the next morning and tell him himself. I said he could have until then, but if I found out he didn’t go, I would.”

“What happened?”

“He left that night on a mission. I went to my supervisor immediately, but by then it was too late. The team was dead,” she whispered. “All of them.”

“Haley, I’m so sorry.”

“I wasn’t on that mission because I’d requested three days of leave.”

He winced.

“I was furious with him—” She waved a hand as though in dismissal. “I was blazing mad at Brendan for being so stupid as to put everyone at risk and getting them killed because he forgot what he was supposed to do—and overwhelmed with guilt that I hadn’t said something to my supervisor immediately. I hated myself for a long time, but I had to finally realize that hate is a very destructive emotion and I want it to have no place in my heart.” She drew in a deep breath. “So, no, I can’t hate Hugh for doing something so similar to what I myself have done. He’s human, he made a tragic mistake, and he wishes desperately he’d made a different choice. I get that. I feel that to this day. But no one can change what happened and hating him doesn’t hurt him, it just hurts me.”

“What if he wasn’t sorry? What if he didn’t care that he’d caused their deaths. Would you hate him then?”

She hesitated. “I don’t know. It’s hard to say what I would or wouldn’t feel. I know what I would hope my reaction would be, but . . .” She shrugged. “I can’t say. I can tell you this. My ex-boyfriend didn’t care that he hurt me, that what he did was wrong. He used me and laughed about it—even bragged about it around the office to his buddies. Hating him felt good at first. It consumed me. I wanted revenge, to destroy him and his career. And I was close to doing it simply because I could.”

“But you didn’t.”

“No.”

“What stopped you?”

“The thought of who I would become if I did it. The truth is, he’s a good operative, he’s just a lousy person. I saw the signs but ignored them because I wanted something in my life besides work, so I have only myself to blame for that. But when it was all over, I realized I never really loved him. I loved that he was in the same business as I and we could talk about our jobs and not have secrets from each other.” She gave a wry smile. “Turns out he was keeping secrets anyway.” She gave a slight shrug. “So I had to let it go. It wasn’t easy. It was definitely a daily thing and sometimes an hourly thing, but eventually, it got easier. And then one day I realized that I had truly released the hate and he had no more power over me. No kind of hold over me at all. I don’t really know how to explain it. It was like the heart that had held so much hate and anger and bitterness had been removed and a new one had taken its place.” She gave a soft chuckle at his skeptical expression. “I know it’s hard to take in. I can only credit God with it. Without his help, I’d still have a heart full of hate.”