Somehow I didn’t expect to spend my first Valentine’s Day in a sort-of relationship with my head over a toilet.

Bad shellfish was the first thing I told myself.

I hadn’t eaten any, but I had prepared it at work yesterday. Close enough, right?

My next guess was the flu. I was around people day in and day out. Easy enough to catch something. Many things.

Pretty sure I couldn’t catch a baby though.

It was just crappy timing. I mean, logically, who got knocked up the first time they had sex? The odds were probably infinitesimal.

You’ve definitely been increasing your odds by fucking like horny rabbits since though.

Didn’t matter. Babies took time to cook. It had only been a few weeks since the initial boot-knocking in Vegas. What kind of child would make his or her presence known this early?

Oliver Hamilton’s, that who. Pain in the ass that he is.

Hot pain in the ass.

I hadn’t even been at the best time in my cycle for such things. Not the worst either, since I’d just finished my period before vacation.

I was probably worrying for nothing. But hey, I had plenty of time to fret with my head over the bowl. It wasn’t as if I felt up to debating my wardrobe for the night as I had been before my breakfast decided to back up on me.

Normally, I would ask Ally such questions. I wished I could. She was at the end of her pregnancy and distracted, but obviously, that wasn’t why I hadn’t been able to do a full bestie share. I felt so guilty. Part of me wanted nothing more than to giggle over far more details than were necessary—hello, we were with brothers, twins no less, so it was almost an imperative we discuss some of the dirty nitty-gritty—but the rest of me thought it was asking for trouble.

It had already been a few weeks since Vegas. Oliver rarely lasted this long with anyone, unless he only saw them bi-monthly. Not the case with me. We were seeing each other constantly. Every time we met, it was all hungry hands and greedy mouths and rude comments mixed in with sweetness and filthy lovemaking.

I would’ve never said he was the sort of man I wanted. Not in a million years. He cleaned up well, and he had manners galore and very nicely shed them once the bedroom door was closed—and how. But he wielded snark as easily as compliments, and my father wasn’t like that. Seth wasn’t like that with Ally, though of course they had their share of banter. But I’d always expected a relationship to look a certain way, and this was not it.

God, it was so much better than even my wildest imaginings. Who could blame me for being scared to do anything to change it? Right now, things were perfect. Oliver hadn’t yet exhibited itchy feet, and if he did, no one would know we’d ended except me.

That meant no sad looks from my bestie. No worried comments from my parents. No concern from the townspeople who couldn’t help being busybodies.

No sharing excitement with said bestie or mom or townspeople. No laughing over the latest male idiocy or enjoying that feeling of being part of a secret club.

The “I finally have someone” club.

The “oh yes, I do have a date for that party” club.

The “yay, I don’t have to buy my own roses on Valentine’s Day” club.

Although I would probably have to just the same, because…Oliver. But still.

Why should we mess around with a winning formula? Even the secrecy made things hotter.

It also made them more inconvenient.

And upsetting when we had to lie to those who mattered most.

And awkward, since it was getting harder to come up with excuses why we couldn’t do things with Seth and Ally when we were basically using all our non-work hours to fuck and sleep.

More on the fucking, less on the sleeping.

I’d had to hide my swear gallon under an old sweater in the closet. The way Oliver wielded that word in my ear while he was inside me had led to me using it fairly often myself.

The slippery slope I was on had turned into an ice-covered Magic Mountain.

When I was reasonably sure I wasn’t going to toss any more cookies, I stumbled to my feet and into my bedroom. Where I curled up on my bed and, like the mature woman of the world I was becoming, wished heartily for my mommy.

Ugh, being sick alone was no fun. Especially when thoughts were preying on me that this “sickness” would last for a full nine months.

If only I could ask Ally how soon she’d had morning sickness. For that matter, I wasn’t sure she’d had much. She’d talked about carrying crackers just in case, but she hadn’t regaled me with tales of worshipping the porcelain god and hoping for oblivion.

Then again, I was the oversharer of our duo.

Before I could question the impulse, I crawled across the bed and snatched my cell off the nightstand to send her a quick text. Maybe she had some free time today and I could oh so casually inquire what her first signs were of being with child.

Ally replied right away.

I’m @ the real estate office, sprucing it up. This place is 2 boring. So I brought in some silk flowers.

Grinning, I sat up cross-legged.

Should I buy some little heart lights? Or better yet, baby bunnies? Easter stuff is in the stores.

Ally wasn’t as quick to answer that one.

Um, well, maybe if it’s tasteful, but you know Oliver does work here & he’s not really into decorations.

My grin turned downright demonic. Even not being able to see my own reflection, I knew it. Getting to decorate and annoying Oliver to boot? Double-bonus day.

Distraction from possible baby brewing in my belly, check.

I’m grabbing both hearts and bunnies, got it. What about window clings? Or oh, a festive doormat? Maybe both. You know, increase curb appeal.

I couldn’t type fast enough. Ally wasn’t answering me. No problemo. I just wanted to get my ideas down.

Jeez, I hadn’t been this excited since…

Since you used to dream about staging houses for a living, along with running the bed-and-breakfast.

Yeah, well, this was just for fun. Just a way to keep my hands busy since I had too much on my mind and didn’t have plans until tonight with Oliver.

Hmm, they have those copper buckets at the florist’s, the ones right out front? A spray of delicate white blooms would be pretty & they would chase away some of the gloom.

Ally finally responded.

You do realize Oliver hasn’t sanctioned any of these changes, right? He doesn’t even know about my silk flowers, but Seth figured pregnancy dispensation. U don’t have that.

Oh, if she only knew. Thank God, she didn’t. Thank God, I didn’t.

There was nothing to know.

Bad shellfish. That was my story, and I was sticking to it.

Let me handle Oliver.

That made me giggle. Pissing him off was half the fun, since I’d discovered he tended to be even more inventive while dirty-talking naked if I riled him up beforehand. Not seriously riled up, of course. Just from teasing him about the lack of a pair of worn-in jeans in his wardrobe, or that he really had Celine’s greatest hits on his running playlist. Or decorating his office in crazy frou-frou crap like holiday lights and maybe drawing a bunny on his desk calendar. Stuff like that.

Nothing like “oh, hey, how do you feel about me having your baby?”

Or “remember that morning-after pill? I swear, the reason I didn’t take it wasn’t because I was hoping to get inseminated with a golden Hamilton offspring.”

I was pretty sure he wouldn’t get riled up sexually after either of those questions.

Another message came through from Ally.

If you say so. So you’re coming by? Lunch after?

Sure. Where do you want to eat?

Oh God, I could eat a horse & its young. Hmm, how about that new Italian place?

I was already salivating. So much for the flu. I’d no sooner finished throwing up than I was ravenous. That didn’t seem likely for some kind of weird food poisoning either.

Lordy, was I fucked. Possibly fucked.

But what I didn’t know for sure couldn’t harm me. In the meantime, there were carbs.

With the hot pumpernickel rolls?

No way. Really? I think I just had an O. Not that I remember what those feel like.

If those rolls are as good as they say, they’re probably almost as good as my last O.

Yeah, no self-generated Os either. I’d have to climb over my belly to even get near between my legs.

I started to text back that mine definitely hadn’t been self-generated—I still didn’t really know how to do those properly, Oliver or no Oliver—when reality smacked me like a cold, dead fish.

Self-generated was all I was supposed to be having. Anything else would be deemed a bestie betrayal of the highest order.

You lost your virginity and you didn’t tell me?

Worse, the Oliver thing. What was the next level beyond bestie betrayal? Friendship homicide?

Then again, Ally had been the one who’d sent Oliver after me to Vegas. If not for her, we wouldn’t be having the best sex of my life. Well, I’d had no sex before, but still, I knew when I was in the presence of greatness.

Not Oliver himself. Just his penis. He was egotistical enough. I wasn’t going to help him by telling him how he’d rocked my world.

Rather than even addressing Os in any form with Ally, I went with the better part of valor. I ended the conversation and said I’d see her soon, gaudy decorations along with a little class for contrast in hand.

I finished packing my overnight bag with my new lingerie—full price for the first time ever—then picked up the tiny swan I’d searched through that box of paper goods to find.

God, I was already looking forward to seeing Oliver again and it had been, what, five hours since he’d left my loft? It didn’t seem to matter.

If this was what it felt like to be an addict, I didn’t want to stop. And that scared me most of all.

After grabbing my bag, I headed downstairs. I dropped the bag in my trunk, but I didn’t take my car to lunch. Why bother when the real estate office was right down the street, along with the drugstore and florist, and the Italian place was just around the corner?

Blessing and curse of a small town. Everything and everyone was right there. No privacy. No secrets.

No running away.

Except that was just what I was doing. I wasn’t headed toward the stores I wanted to stop by on the way to Hamilton Realty. It was warm for mid-February, so I’d detoured to my favorite place pretty much all year long.

The shore of Crescent Lake.

There were a few kids and parents stomping through the slushy snow, and the mail boat was just pulling into the dock. The wind stirred my hair and I pushed it back, narrowing my eyes on a little brunette girl who was racing in circles with a balloon in her hand. Bright pink. While I watched, she let go and cried out as it floated away.

As if in slow motion, I ran toward it, diving up into the air to try to snatch it before the wind yanked it away. My fingers brushed the end of the ribbon, wrapped around, and locked on. I released a triumphant cheer and fell back on my ass in the snow, the pain echoing dully through my spine.

Smart. Real smart. You’re afraid you’re pregnant and you just did a swan dive? What’s wrong with you?

“Thanks, lady,” the little girl said, tugging the balloon from my hand. A tall, willowy woman I assumed was her mother was behind her, hand on her shoulder. “I just got it for winnin’.”

Winning what, I wondered, but she was probably around Laurie’s age and I didn’t want to make her mom uncomfortable. I didn’t recognize her, so maybe she was new in town. Not that I knew everyone, but I knew a lot of people, especially working at the diner.

“Y-you’re welcome.” Without realizing it, I’d clamped an arm protectively over my belly.

“Are you okay?” The woman frowned, pushing back the long red hair that had escaped from her sturdy-looking hat. “You look pale.”

“Sure thing. I’m fine. Hey, look at me. Plenty of padding.” Laughing a little, I got to my feet and brushed off my snowy, wet butt. Glad I’d spent so long picking out this cute eggplant-colored velvet skirt and pairing it with my gray leggings.

Now I was a soggy mess. At least I’d done a good deed.

The little girl ran off to join her friends—or a class, I realized. There were too many kids running and laughing to be just one family’s children. I shivered. If one woman had borne all of them, God save the queen. There was another woman trying to herd them. A class monitor, maybe, or assistant.

“You’re not her mother,” I said, retaining my title as queen of the obvious.

The other woman laughed and held out a hand. “No, I’m her teacher, Kelsey Ford. I live in Turnbull right now, though I’m moving to town soon. I’m new to Crescent Cove Elementary. I took over one of the kindergarten classes.” She cast a look skyward. “Midyear replacement. Always the best.”

I pumped her hand before releasing it. “Oh wow, yes, I pick up my bestie’s daughter from half-day kindergarten sometimes, but she has Mrs. Pollock.”

“Oh, yes. Technically, they could combine the two small half-day classes, but personal attention with the teachers in our non-traditional kindergarten setting is a big selling point for the school. Goodness knows I have my hands full as is. The full-day teachers deal with much more.”

“I just bet. Nice to meet you.” I returned her smile, still clutching my wet backside with the other. Classy. “I’m Sage Evans. My family owns the bed-and—”

I stopped. Nope. That wasn’t me anymore. I knew that. So why had I slipped? It wasn’t as if I’d fallen into a time warp and the past year hadn’t happened.

“Oh, the bed-and-breakfast right up the street? That pretty purple and gray one with the huge porch?” She angled her head, her lips pursing. “Funny, I thought I saw a sign when I drove by there today. Future site of condos or something? I was so unhappy, thinking what clowns didn’t see the architectural value in—” She broke off and flushed the same color as her hair. “I’m sorry. Diarrhea of the mouth is a weakness.”

“You too? I can see we’ll be fast friends.” I laughed loudly to stop the tears already stabbing my eyes from having free rein.

Condos. How could this be happening? How could my parents have sold our home right out from underneath me to people who didn’t even care about the place and all the memories that had been made there?

That was why I wouldn’t spend that money. Not for me. If I was having a baby, it would be different. I’d use the money my parents had given me to ensure his or her future. But I would never use those profits for my own gain.

“Hey, are you sure you’re all right?” Kelsey smiled at me gently. “Did I say something I shouldn’t have about the bed-and-breakfast? I’m sorry. I’m so new here. I don’t know a single soul except a few of the other teachers and Principal Gentry.”

“No, no. You didn’t do anything.” I waved off her concern. “My parents sold the bed-and-breakfast. Progress and all that. I used to work there, and now I’m a waitress.” I patted my hip. “Discounted meals, quite the bonus. Anyway, I should go.” Before I started to sob or something equally distressing. “So nice to meet you.”

“Wait, can we maybe have dinner sometime?” Kelsey flushed again. “I know, I know, I seem desperate for friends, but I guess I am. I just really don’t know anyone, like I said, and it’s Valentine’s Day and it’s totally lame to be alone.” She brightened. “Unless you’re free too tonight?”

I hated to say no. I had been in her spot. Not the new-in-town thing, but I understood the need to not spend another Valentine’s Day alone.

Except this time, I wouldn’t be. I wasn’t in a real relationship—probably not in the cards for me—but I wouldn’t be alone.

“I’m sorry, no, I have plans.”

“Oh, of course, you do. Pretty girl like you, you have to have a boyfriend.” Her eyebrows climbed. “Oh God, I didn’t mean that how it must sound. I swear, I wasn’t trying to pick you up—”

I laughed for real. This woman truly was my mouth-twin. “We are definitely destined to be friends.” I pulled out my phone from my purse and handed it to her. “Put in your number and we’ll set something up for next week. Maybe not dinner though.” Depended on if my food-poisoning-slash-baby was still a factor. “We could always do a movie.”

“Movies are good.” She typed in her number, and then I did the same when she handed me her phone. She wasn’t letting me get away.

Another way we were alike.

“So nice to meet you,” she said, backing up. “I have to get back to my class. Have a good Valentine’s Day with your boyfriend!” she called, jogging off.

And what did I do? Whip my head around to make sure we hadn’t been overheard.

God, I needed to get a grip.

But I didn’t stop there. After brushing off the backs of my legs more thoroughly, I walked the length of this side of the lake, past the gazebo, past the boat launch, until I was standing at the four corners opposite the bed-and-breakfast. I tucked my bare hands in the pockets of my coat and studied the splashy sign that proclaimed condos were coming, forcing myself to face the reality head-on.

No more hiding.

Then I crossed the street and headed into the drugstore, where I avoided entirely the home pregnancy test section—too early, not applicable, eff it, I can only face so many things in one day—and aimed straight for the Valentine’s section, already on clearance.

Most likely, I wouldn’t have loaded up on quite so much stuff if I hadn’t been wound up from condo signs and the nearness of little sticks demanding fresh urine. I enjoyed goading Oliver under the best of circumstances, but I did realize Hamilton Realty was a place of business and probably shouldn’t have enough decorations to outfit a kindergarten class.

More children. I had them on the brain. Look at that, there went another set of heart lights into my basket. Tiny white ones I would drape among the blooms in the copper pots I would buy at the florist.

A text chimed, and I glanced at my phone. Ally.

Where the heck are you? I’m getting hungry and I thought you wanted to decorate. Tastefully.

I snorted and looked at my basket. It was overflowing with crap. Some I would take home. Some I intended to drape over and around Oliver until he yelled uncle.

So yeah, there was a good chance my Valentine’s sex would end up leaving me high and dry.

I sent back a brief reply.

Be right there.

One quick trip to the florist later, and I heaved myself and two stubby copper pots filled with my drugstore bags up the round steps to the real estate office. Ally was standing in the doorway, arms crossed.

“Really? I said tasteful, and you buy everything?” She shuffled forward to take one of the copper pots and I batted at her hands.

“No. Uh-uh. Baby on board. Don’t you dare.”

You might have a baby on board too, you know. One who is like her daddy and already churning you up.

Moving on.

“At least let me take one of these bags.” She plucked one of the plastic bags out of the copper pots and peeked inside. “Oh my God, he’s going to kill you. And me. Both of us.”

“Bring it,” I huffed. “I’m not scared of Oliver Hamilton.”

I nudged past Ally—and Ally’s formidable belly—into the foyer and flashed a bright smile at Shelly, their administrative assistant. “Hi there. Love your hair. Did you get highlights?”

“That eye of yours never misses a trick. Why, thank you. I did. Just a little blond on the auburn.” Shelly patted her do and grinned as she came around the desk to eye my purchases. She availed herself of one of my copper pots, which was handy since they weighed a ton. I set the other one beside her impeccably tidy desk. “Well, then, you’re counting on Seth to be in a good mood because of impending fatherhood, but what’s your hope with Oliver?”

“Don’t have one. He’ll deal. We’ll just leave the pots out here since I have to run back to get the actual flowers. My hands were a little full.” I headed up the hallway with my other two plastic bags, stopping short as Mr. Hamilton senior aimed my way.

Oh shit. I hadn’t seen him since Oliver and I had—since we were—oh God.

“Hi, Mr. Hamilton. How are you, sir? You look well. Really well. I have to say that tie color really is nice on you. The blue matches your salt and pepper—” I broke off and gulped for air. Oh dear Lord, I was complimenting my lover’s father on his hair. I smiled weakly. “Um, you look nice.”

Mr. Hamilton chuckled as if I wasn’t the most awkward woman in the world. He’d always been so nice to me. Unlike his sons, one in particular.

“Why, thank you, Sage. Let me help you with those bags.” He took both of them out of my hands, ignoring my protests. “What do we have here? Oh, decorations.” I expected him to grunt and make some caustic remark ala Oliver, but he only smiled benevolently and pulled out my springy-heart headband. “I think this would be perfect for Oliver, don’t you?”

The unexpected olive branch made me laugh as I put the headband on my own head and Ally snorted behind me. “It would take an act of God to make him wear it.”

“Oh, I don’t know. Sometimes I suspect he’s a little soft on you.”

I stopped walking. Not just paused. Stopped as if I was rooted to the floor. “No way.”

He nodded, still walking toward the offices as if he hadn’t realized I’d gotten stuck in a giant puddle of metaphorical glue. “A man knows his son. His bark is way worse than his bite.” He turned and frowned at me, still standing in place with Ally nudging my shoulder. “Well, c’mon then. Let’s get this taken care of before he comes back and ruins our fun.”

“Whoa.” Ally gripped my shoulder and whispered, “Are we in another dimension? Since when does Mr. Hamilton like decorating for anything? He barely even consents to a Christmas tree.”

“Sounds like his son.”

“Hey, Seth isn’t like that. He actually wanted two trees this year. One for our bedroom too.” Ally’s smile jabbed a knife in my ribs, and heck if I knew why.

I was so happy for her. If anyone deserved true love, it was her and Seth. I was probably jealous. Probably wondering if I’d ever find that myself.

If ever a certain other Hamilton man could—

Nope. Aborted. Not going there. It was this dumb holiday. The day screwed with a happily swinging, single-ish lady with a hot, secret lover and made her think she wanted more.

I didn’t. I was happy just as things were.

“Oh, I know. I meant Oliver.” I followed Mr. Hamilton into his office and let out a laugh as I noticed he’d hung the little wooden heart dude with swinging legs off the corner of his desk. “Aww, it looks so cute there. You really don’t mind, sir?”

“Enough with that sir nonsense. Call me James.”

“Seriously?” Ally mumbled in my ear. “He just let me call him James a few months ago. Teacher’s pet.”

“Oh, but I couldn’t…” I said, waving at my face with my hand. I was going to overheat.

“You absolutely can, and you should. I think the rest of this is more fitting for my sons, however,” he added with a wink, passing the bags back to me.

I took them in shaky hands. I didn’t even know why I was so freaked out. Mr. Hamilton had always been kind to me, and I’d known him forever. But everything was different now.

At least I knew it was different. To him, it was same old, same old.

“Oliver will probably toss me out.” I tried to smile.

“If he gives you any trouble, you send him to me.” Mr. Hamilton glanced past me toward Ally. “Alison, you look peaked. Go sit down, why don’t you? Take a load off.”

“Also new,” Ally said in an undertone as we walked up the hall to Seth’s office after saying our goodbyes to the elder Hamilton. “I was joking with Seth he must be getting laid or something, because he was never that concerned about me before.”

“Hamilton baby bun in the oven.”

“Hmm, that may be true for me, but why is he being so nice to you?”

Don’t jinx me, please. I shut my eyes and nearly walked into the doorframe of Seth’s office. Wow, I was going for some clumsiness land and speed records today. “He’s always been nice.”

“Showoff. So, what do you have in mind?” She braced her hands on her hips and considered. “I would suggest doing the bulk of your decorating in here. Seth’s less likely to have a kitten.”

“Oh, I know. That’s exactly why I bought so much to torture Oliver with.”

“You do seem to enjoy that. Even more lately.”

“What? No, I don’t. No more lately than usual.” I sorted through one of the bags, tossing twinkle lights, streamers, foil doodads, and other sundries on Seth’s desk. “How long do we have?”

“Until they’re back from their client meeting?” Ally consulted her watch. “Maybe half an hour. Oliver has another meeting at three, and you know how he is.” She rolled her eyes. “Must be back an hour early to ‘prepare’, no matter what. Just as well though, since I’m starving. We’re still on for Mario’s, right? Please say yes.”

“Of course. I’m going to smuggle out some of those rolls in my bag for a snack for later if they’re as good as everyone says.”

Ally laughed.

I rubbed my hands together. The best way to dismiss worrisome thoughts was to keep busy. And to enjoy annoying my lover. “Okay, let’s get to work. We don’t have a minute to waste.”