Chapter 1
With the sun freshly perched in the sky, silently and brilliantly nudging Washington, DC and its suburbs awake from their collective slumber, Silas Reams was on the move. Excited to be out on the trail yet cautiously easing back into the groove of running, Silas drew the warm, August air into his lungs and exhaled quickly. In his mind, he was a locomotive, gradually, powerfully building up steam. “C’mon, man. Pick it up!” he nudged, challenging himself to increase his pace and really get his blood going.
Once he was warmed up and ready to charge ahead, Silas felt like a newly-tuned, well-oiled machine. As his legs propelled him forward, his arms pumped in tandem and his body cut through the atmosphere with mounting precision. Interestingly enough, while his body was in the midst of a one-man race so was his mind. Yet as if a baton of sorts was passed, between his physical and mental selves, the thoughts bouncing around in Silas’ head began to surge ahead and take precedence over everything else. Though his sides and knees were starting to sting, Silas was too preoccupied – thinking about how his life was getting ready to change in a significant way – to fully process, or really care about, his physical state. After years of running, he had conditioned his body to push through fatigue and endure pain. Today, he had to get reacquainted with the analogous process of conditioning his mind to do the same. In no uncertain terms, the newest, multi-layered challenge on his plate gave him major pause – largely because he wasn’t sure that he could handle it successfully. But, with the stakes as high as they were, Silas knew that he didn’t have much of a choice but to figure it out and – just like he was doing on the trail – keep moving forward.
Here was the deal: after two years away, in a sort of self-imposed hiatus, Silas was about to get back in the saddle and start – on some level – at the end again. It had been nearly twenty-six months since he found out that he would be a dad for the first time. Convinced that providing for the new baby he had help to create was his most important priority, Silas made the excruciatingly tough decision to drop out of school and take on a job as a software developer. The fact that he was in the first semester of his senior year at the time – and so close to the end – made it particularly hard to throw in the towel. But, with a baby on the way and an immediate need for income, Silas believed that the choice – though difficult – was clear.
Today would be his first day back at Stronghold University since dropping out and he was actively, though unsuccessfully, trying to reconcile the mixed feelings he had about picking up where he’d left off. While he was excited to embark upon the journey of conquering a major milestone, he felt real trepidation about how his life would play out as both a student and a dad. Each role came with its own set of stressors and intertwining them together would surely be overwhelming. But, as he ran on a path near Stronghold’s campus, he was literally and figuratively on the periphery of his destiny and he couldn’t deny that a part of him was eager to get the fall semester underway.
With his music going, his muscles engaged, and his mind quiet for the moment, Silas felt like he was finally settling in to his run. That is, until he saw her running towards him from the opposite direction. A true vision in vibrant, breath-taking motion, Silas could hardly believe how he’d become so captivated by her at first sight. This had never happened to him before and he wondered, just for a second, if she was some kind of mirage and not real at all. All things considered, his interests were beyond piqued, and he immediately, quietly wanted to soak in as much of her as he could.
To satisfy his interests and maintain his pride, Silas only watched her in short spurts fully realizing that, at the speed he was going, she would be out of his field of vision sooner than later. She was beautiful with her green-eyed gaze focused straight ahead as she powered forward along the trail. Her long blond hair was gathered into a ponytail, and swinging in the wind, much like a flaxen banner. Without question, this stranger was as elegant as her running form and Silas was having a hard time staying focused. She, on the other hand, appeared to be oblivious to his existence, and only interested in sprinting ahead on the tree-lined path at her feet.
After she had passed him by, with barely a look in his direction, Silas was forced to come back down to earth. Though he would’ve liked some indicator that she was interested in him too, he didn’t get one – not even close. Wondering if he might be passing up an opportunity, for a second, he contemplated doubling back to catch up with her. But, after a little more thought, he quickly abandoned that idea. Despite his best efforts, Silas had been unlucky in love before. He reasoned, more than likely, that the beautiful green-eyed girl would be a miss instead of a hit. Yet again, he pressed forward.
Once he was back in his stride, it didn’t take long for Silas’ mind to shift again. This time, to another beautiful girl: his seventeen-month old daughter Ava. Conceived at the end of a three-year relationship, Silas’ daughter came unexpectedly in the midst of a painful breakup with Kalyn, Ava’s mother. Though there had undoubtedly been bumpy times during Kalyn’s pregnancy and after Ava’s birth, the estranged couple somehow managed to co-parent and raise their baby girl together in a patched-together series of alternate days, weekends, and holidays. As kids of broken homes themselves, the young, mindful parents were rather deliberate about ensuring that Ava didn’t encounter many of the negative experiences they had coming up. In particular, they took particular care not to fight in front of her and to present a united front even when there wasn’t one. Though noble, this approach inherently came with its own set of growing pains and could, on occasion, be rather draining. For Silas in particular – missing some of Ava’s firsts, not having her for Christmas, and adjusting to Kalyn’s new boyfriend – the challenge of raising his daughter between two homes had been downright agonizing at times. But, keeping Ava’s needs at the center of their relationship was highly important to both of her parents and they had worked hard to ensure her well-being.
As he began to close the loop of his run and get closer to home base, Silas slowed his pace down significantly into a light jog. Feeling invigorated, refreshed, and accomplished, he slowly let his body adjust and cool down. Right on cue, at the perfect time, he felt his phone begin to ring in the strap on his arm. He looked over to see who was calling and then pushed a button on his earphones to answer it.
“Hey Kalyn, what’s up?” he began, in between measured gasps of air. “Everything OK?” he interjected, before she could get a word out, unsure about why she had reached out to him so unexpectedly. Before Ava was born, getting a call out of the ordinary never really jarred Silas; he had at least wait to find out what the call was about first before reacting one way or the other. Now, charged with the responsibility of loving, molding, and protecting a baby, he couldn’t help but always be on guard.
“Oh, nothing’s wrong,” Kalyn assured, sensing Silas’ concern and wanting to assuage it as soon as possible. “It’s just that I’ve got someone who insists on talking to you,” she bubbled, before relinquishing the phone.
Knowing that Kalyn’s announcement could only mean one thing, Silas’ heart melted a million times over – so much so, he stopped in his tracks and waited with bated breath to hear what would come next.
“Here’s daddy,” he heard Kalyn say from a distance, almost cooing. “Say hi,” she insisted.
“Pop!” Ava chimed, intermittently and on repeat. Neither Silas nor Kalyn could figure out when she started calling him that or where she got the name from but, for whatever reason, it seemed to stick.
“Hi baby!” he gushed, getting back into a slow walk and feeling his heart swell in his chest. “It’s so good to hear your voice!” he beamed, listening carefully as she babbled on. Without knowing what she was saying, save for a few distinguishable words, Silas lent an attentive ear. He even interlaced a “Really?” or a “You don’t say!” into the conversation every now and then just to assure her that he was paying attention. After a few more words back and forth, he heard Kalyn’s voice again in the background.
“OK, say goodbye to Pop!” she instructed, using Ava’s word of choice this time around.
“Bye!” Ava said, right before Kalyn took reign of the phone again.
“She insisted that she talk to you,” Kalyn announced, “she’s been saying ‘Pop!’ all morning long.”
“That’s my girl,” Silas said, his breathing even, his heart rate consistent, his spirit dancing with pride.
“One more thing, “Kalyn said, as if she had just remembered something, “I know it’s not your weekend, but can you keep Ava this Friday and Saturday?”
“Mmmm,” Silas said, dubious about whether this was the real reason for the call. He’d had Ava the weekend before and having her two weeks in a row was not at all in his plan. But, as he had learned from prior experience, when it came to his baby, remaining as flexible as possible was the name of the game. “Well, school starts today,” he murmured – not saying no, just thinking out loud. “I’m not sure what my workload will look like this weekend…”
While waiting for him to sort it out, and give a definite yes or no answer, Kalyn was initially quiet. But as time inched on, she became increasingly impatient. “I’ll be back to get her no later than 3 o’clock on Saturday,” she blurted out, “if that will help.”
Silas quietly weighed his options.
“It’s just – I’ve got to run out of town early Saturday morning and I need to make sure that she’s taken care of.”
“You know what, yeah, I can keep her,” Silas said, settling the issue for himself and giving Kalyn an answer in one fell swoop.
“Cool!” Kalyn gushed, shortly before signing off.
Suddenly at his front door, and at the end of his workout, Silas made his way into his small apartment and over to the shower. He had about an hour and a half before his first class would begin. He quickly got dressed, grabbed a banana and a mug of coffee, and headed out of the door. Though he was in reasonable walking distance, Silas decided to drive in. Along the way, the gravity of his latest undertaking seemed to become more intense the closer he got to campus. After parking, he took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and silently gave himself a pep talk. From the outside in, it almost looked as if he was in the middle of a prayer. He had been thinking about getting back to this point of his life for quite some time, and now that it was here, it almost felt surreal.
Realizing that a journey of a thousand steps starts with the first one, he opened his door, planted his left foot firmly on the ground, and brought the other leg out before standing upright. As he began to walk toward Harrison T. Wilson Hall for his Discrete Mathematics course, the last two years of his life flooded through his mind. In a relatively short time, he had become a full-time app developer, welcomed a new baby into the world, and generated a considerable amount of savings. Now he was coming back to complete his degree, after experiencing several bumps and bruises along the way, and working harder than he ever had in his life. He was more than ready to get back to it, to make his mark, and most importantly, make Ava proud of him in the long run. Though he had to psych himself out a little, he made a lofty, highly-motivated commitment: he was going to make this year his best ever and do all he could to secure a comfortable future for himself and Ava.