“Zara? Gino?” Bellisia came running up the stairs leading to the porch. She was soaking wet, the water running off her in small rivulets. Behind her, looking protective, was Ezekiel. He was wet too, but he had a towel and was drying off as he watched them warily.
“I’m so sorry for the way I acted,” Bellisia said immediately, making Zara feel worse. Zara shook her head to try to forestall her but Bellisia continued. “I don’t know why I’m so anxious for you, Zara. I just want to lock you away where no one can get to you. Just for a little while until I know you’re whole again.”
Bellisia looked down at her hands. Zara couldn’t tell if tears were swimming in her eyes or if it was the water from the river. “I saw those bruises and lacerations all over you and it just about killed me. If I hadn’t escaped, if I’d gone back, maybe Whitney wouldn’t have sent you to Cheng.”
“Of course he would have sent me, Bellisia,” Zara said immediately. “We talked about escaping. All three of us. We had an agreement. There’s no reason for you to feel like any of this was your fault, because it wasn’t.”
“I shouldn’t have told you I needed to tell Ezekiel, and I haven’t.” Bellisia sent Ezekiel a quick look of guilt. “That shouldn’t have been my first response. It’s just that I trust him so much and I guess I didn’t think beyond that.”
Gino shifted his body just enough to draw the attention of both women. “I’m going to get some of Nonny’s strawberry lemonade. Bellisia? Zara? You good with lemonade? Maybe you could help me, Zeke?”
“Of course,” Ezekiel offered immediately. He dropped a kiss on Bellisia’s head as he moved past her.
Bellisia waited until the men had gone into the house before coming all the way onto the porch. She hadn’t dried off because her body required moisture, so much of it that sometimes in the middle of the night she got up, filled a tub with water and immersed herself in liquid.
“I should have trusted your judgment,” Zara conceded. “I know Ezekiel must have realized you were keeping a secret. Was he very upset with you?”
Bellisia shrugged and waved that away. “I feel like I drove you right to Gino because of the way I acted. Why were you able to trust him so fast? To trust his decisions?”
Zara could hear the hurt in her voice. Bellisia looked near tears, and she’d always been the strongest one of the three of them.
“I’ve been your sister since we were a year or so old,” Bellisia continued. “It was always Shylah, you and me. All those years together, depending on one another, and yet you went to Gino instead of Ezekiel. I don’t understand.”
“I don’t know what I expected when we talked,” Zara said. “I wasn’t being fair to you, I guess. You were saying things I didn’t want to hear, things you had no way of knowing would hurt me. I realized your loyalty wasn’t just to me anymore, it was to Ezekiel first, and that made me feel very alone. You had your husband, and I was alone. Not just alone, the one person I had come to depend on, Gino, you were trying to pull out from under me. I know you were trying to protect me, Bellisia, but at the time, I was feeling raw and hurt. Things haven’t been good for me since you’ve been gone. Whitney retaliated against Shylah and me both. He thought we knew what you planned.”
“I’m sorry.” Bellisia leaned against the railing, staying out of the sun so the water wouldn’t dry too fast on her skin.
“Don’t be. None of this is your fault. You’re supposed to trust your husband and put him first. I understand that now, and I should have taken the time to understand that then. I was being childish not wanting to trust him just because I was jealous that he had you and I no longer did. I just needed you so much right then and thought it was going to be the same. You. Me. Apart from everyone else.”
“Why Gino?”
“Tell me why you don’t like him.”
Bellisia opened her mouth to deny that claim but then closed it and frowned instead, thinking it over. “It isn’t that I don’t like him, Zara. I don’t know him. No one really knows him. I’ve seen men like him though. He’s more at home in the woods or the swamp than in a house, although, I suspect he’d be at home hunting in a city. Anywhere he chooses could be a hunting ground.”
Zara couldn’t fault her for thinking that. She thought it herself. She needed the hunter, the predator in him. She was drawn to that part of him.
“He likes being alone and as far as I can see, the only ones he really spends time with are Trap, Wyatt, Draden and Joe. Even then, he looks out for them.”
“And Nonny, Pepper, Cayenne, the children and you, Bellisia.” Zara didn’t think that was a fault at all. If anything, she admired Gino for it and she trusted and relied on him because of those traits. “I think all the GhostWalkers, including your husband, have that same trait.”
Bellisia nodded reluctantly. “Yes,” she conceded. “I think that’s a fair assessment.”
“That still doesn’t say why you don’t like him.”
Bellisia sighed and went to Zara’s side, lowering her voice so she was practically whispering in Zara’s ear. “I don’t know if I should tell you this. I’ve already screwed up big-time by trying to warn you off him.”
“I want to know. I’m asking you.”
“Joe Spagnola is the man leading this team. They all look up to him and respect him. He’s kind and compassionate. A good man, Zara. His father is Ciro Spagnola, a rather infamous crime boss. Ciro and Gino’s father, Jacopo, were close friends growing up. They served in the military together. When Gino’s family was murdered, it was Joe who found them. They saved Gino’s life when they took him in. Gino was raised by Ciro.”
“Gino told me Joe was like a brother to him. I knew they’d been raised together,” Zara acknowledged.
“Joe should have been Jacopo’s son and Gino, Ciro’s,” Bellisia said. “Gino was raised as an enforcer for Ciro. Do you understand what I’m saying? Joe turned his back on that life, but Gino embraced it. He’s done things that aren’t good.” She hesitated again. “An enforcer tortures and kills people, Zara.” She kept her voice very low. “He did that for Ciro. For all I know he’s done that for the military, and we both know if you can do that and sleep at night …”
“He couldn’t have been very old when he joined the military,” Zara pointed out.
She wanted to be more shocked and appalled than she was. Gino was quiet. Watchful. There was something ice-cold and dangerous in his eyes, and he could turn off emotion. She’d seen him do it. He was also the most protective man she’d ever met and she could imagine Ciro drilling it into him as a boy that he had to watch over Joe. Gino had lost his entire family. It stood to reason that he would do whatever Ciro deemed necessary to protect those remaining that he loved.
Gino had told her more than once that he wasn’t a good man. He never lied to her, in fact everything Bellisia was telling her matched up with what Gino had implied. He had confessed that Zhu and he were the same in many ways, that he’d done similar things when needed. She was grateful he’d told her, so she wasn’t shocked when she heard it from Bellisia.
“I know. He followed Joe. But the fact remains, he’s capable of doing things most men aren’t capable of. You were tortured, Zara. He’s capable of that.”
“He would never torture a woman, Bellisia,” Zara said with complete confidence.
“Maybe not, but I’m telling you, honey, it isn’t natural to be able to do some of the things he’s done, both for Ciro and for the military.”
“Are you saying none of the other men would extract information from a prisoner if it was needed to save others in their unit?”
Bellisia was silent for a moment, looking uncomfortable. “I don’t know the answer to that, okay, maybe. Yes. But the difference is, he wouldn’t have a problem with it. He scares me for you.”
“You think he would hurt me, but I’m telling you, he isn’t capable of hurting a woman. If she was an enemy, he might shoot her, but he wouldn’t torture her. He wouldn’t hit me, or abuse me. I know that with everything in me.”
“He’s old-fashioned with women, and that isn’t going to change. I want someone different for you. Someone who allows you the freedom you need.”
Zara rubbed the hem of the shirt she was wearing. Gino’s shirt. It gave her the necessary courage to confess. It was a huge confession and she knew Bellisia would not only be hurt, but possibly angry, and she deserved it.
“About that, Bellisia, the truth is, Gino does give me freedom. He gives me exactly what I need to feel free and whole and safe. I have something I need to tell you and I’m going to warn you up front, you aren’t going to like it. In fact, you’re going to feel betrayed and I never meant it that way. I love you and Shylah. Both of you. I didn’t have anything to contribute to us like the two of you. You both covered me on our missions, when Whitney would send us out. You know you did, no matter how much you want to protest. I wasn’t made for being a soldier. I can fight, but I lack the killer instinct. It made me sick, and both of you covered for me.”
“Honey. We love you. You held your own when it was needed.”
“That’s the point, you two made it so it was rarely needed. You gave me such a gift. I knew it was a gift. I never took it for granted. The two of you were so fierce. Shylah is sensitive, and kind, yet she kicked ass. You were like the sweetest, and you could do whatever was needed, but I let you both down every mission.”
“You didn’t, but keep going. So far, I don’t see the betrayal,” Bellisia prompted.
Zara rubbed the hem of her shirt again as if she could make a genie appear and whisk her away. Or Gino. She didn’t want to admit any of this to Bellisia. She looked up to her. Loved her. She detested disappointing the few people she loved—the few who loved her.
“I needed something to contribute to the three of us. The only thing I had to give the two of you and the other girls was a taste of what was out there in the world.”
“And you did. I can’t tell you what that did for all of us. The stories you told. All the adventures you had. The parties at school. The walks through open parks and the various countries you were able to visit. The contraband you risked so much to get to us. You gave that to us, Zara. You made the world come to life for us and that instilled hope. You also kept us knowing there was something out there, either to fight for and keep safe, if our lives were always in the compound, or to escape and become part of the real world. You gave all of us that.”
Zara nodded. “I know I did. I worked hard at it. I tried to become an observer, a recorder, a storyteller, so I could give the best of everything to you. You deserved it.”
“We needed it,” Bellisia corrected.
That was true. Zara had known that at a very young age. She’d known all the girls had to have hope. She became that hope for them, and she lived that lie for years. For them. She had nothing else to give them when they gave her so much. She hated telling Bellisia the truth, but she had to. It wasn’t fair to be angry at Bellisia when Zara had deliberately deceived her.
“I don’t like being out in the world alone. I felt exposed and vulnerable, just the way I did when we went into battle. I hated school when I was so young and everyone ignored me, made fun of me or tried to push me around. I was petrified. I was terrified when I traveled. Absolutely terrified. Of everything. Of taking a plane alone. Riding in a taxi alone. Checking into a hotel. The worst was standing up in front of all those people and talking about whatever project I’d headed, knowing I was stealing from them. It was a nightmare for me. The last thing I want to do is continue that life.”
The words came out in a rush, and she didn’t know if she’d said enough that Bellisia would understand that the person she’d grown up with and loved wasn’t at all the real one. She was fake. Zara had manufactured her so that she could give them something—so she could fit in and feel as if she belonged. It wasn’t at all the real Zara, but she’d done what she’d thought was right. Once she’d started down that path, there was no going back from it.
Bellisia stared at her for what seemed forever. She finally took a deep breath. “Baby, did you think we wouldn’t love you for who you really are?”
“I didn’t love me. I wanted to be like you and Shylah. I really did. Both of you are so beautiful, strong and funny and everything you do is right. I was the screwup and both of you always had to protect me. You loved the fact that I’m smart. You loved that I could go out of the compound and bring home those stories. I wanted to give them to you.”
“Honey, don’t you realize that Shylah and I loved you for you? Not your brain or your stories, but for you. That sweet, gentle girl who saw every hurt we had and attended to us. You matter to us. You’re our sister. Whitney would have sent you out no matter what. In fact, he probably would have insisted you go out twice as often if he realized you didn’t like it. I would have cherished those stories even more, knowing how difficult it was for you to go.”
“I’m sorry for not telling you the truth, but I couldn’t bear to be that person in your eyes. Whitney already despised my cowardice and I didn’t want you to as well. I couldn’t have stood to see that look in your eyes.”
“Zara, how could you think that?”
“Because I thought it of myself. I still do, although I’m trying to get his voice out of my head and listen to the people I know care about me. I hate that I’m like this. I want to be like you. Like Cayenne. Even Pepper has a reason she can’t fight. Gino told me she gets brain bleeds around too much violence. I don’t have any excuse at all.”
She looked down at her hands. Gino was slowly making her feel as if she wasn’t the coward Whitney had called her, and now, Bellisia was backing up his claim. Better to believe the two people she loved than a man she had grown to despise. Now it just had to sink into her brain and override her lifetime of insecurities.
“You don’t need an excuse. Not everyone has to be that person, Zara. You know you can fight if necessary. You’re proficient enough to take on most people, and if push comes to shove, you always have your last line of defense. I don’t fight on land. I’m too small, especially against Whitney’s supersoldiers. You have to know your strengths and weaknesses.”
“I know mine, I just don’t want anyone else to know them.”
Bellisia sank down into the rocker next to Zara’s and drew her legs up. “Ezekiel is good for me. Maybe Gino’s good for you, but he does scare me a little. I’m not going to lie about that.” She hesitated. “Or the fact that I was a little jealous that you relied on him and not me.”
Zara couldn’t help but laugh. “Jealous? Bellisia, I was so jealous of Ezekiel I couldn’t even look at him. The minute you said you wanted to tell him about the SSD I was so upset I couldn’t stand myself. I don’t know why I trusted Gino so fast, maybe it really is because he rescued me and I’ve relied so heavily on him, but it didn’t feel that way even then. Now, he feels as if he’s a part of me. Maybe the best part.”
Bellisia shook her head. “I don’t like that you sell yourself short, Zara. It isn’t healthy. You can’t get into a relationship if you don’t know yourself and feel as if you’re bringing something equally of value to that other person.”
“I think I’m doing that for him,” Zara said. “I hope I am. He says I am. I don’t like being away from him, and he doesn’t seem to mind sticking close.”
“Honey, you can’t even walk right now. Of course you’re relying on him.”
Zara glanced around the yard and then turned a speculative gaze on Bellisia. “Do you think it’s Whitney? Could he have paired us somehow? Is that what you think?”
Bellisia frowned. “It’s possible but not probable. In any case, what if he did? He can’t do it emotionally so that’s all you and Gino.”
Zara let out her breath. “We talked about pairing, but not in the context of us. I just want something real.” She wanted Gino to fall in love with her, not have him want her because Whitney had decreed they should be together.
“Gino is about as real as it gets. I’m here for you, no matter what. If Gino’s your choice, then I’ll make every effort to get to know him and have an open mind while I do it, but promise me you’ll take into consideration what I told you about Joe’s father and Gino’s background with him. Also, the fact that you still can’t walk and can’t do anything else but rely on him.”
“Gino is my choice, Bellisia.” She was decisive. Firm. Assertive. She recognized her path and she wanted to stay on it because, for her, Gino was the perfect man and she knew it. “Like Ezekiel’s your choice. He’s already making plans to build me a research center. He told me to give him the list of the things I need for it. He isn’t expecting me to sit in a house waiting for him. He knows I need to work, that I want to and it’s important to me. Because it’s important to me, it’s important to him.”
Zara could see the struggle on Bellisia’s face. She wanted to believe. She wanted Gino, if that was Zara’s choice, to be right for her.
“Have you … ”
“Yes. And it was awesome. He’s awesome. I had no idea it could be like that.”
Bellisia really smiled for the first time, her grin a little mischievous. “I have to know, all that practicing, did it pay off?”
“Most assuredly,” Zara said. “You know how I believe in researching everything important. I was very happy I had because I shocked the heck out of him.”
Bellisia laughed. “I’ll bet you did.” The smile faded and she leaned into Zara. “Does he really make you happy? It was fast for you. I’m not saying it isn’t real because I fell hard for Zeke right away, so I know it can happen. Neither of us has ever dated, or spent time with other men. I knew Zeke was right for me. Do you really know, Zara?”
“I know he’s right for me. I’m hoping I’m right for him. There’s a part of me that worries the moment I’m all healed, he won’t feel the same way.”
“That’s Whitney talking. You’re more than good enough for him.”
“It’s not that. He’s so protective of everyone, you said it yourself. He might have the white knight syndrome. We read about it, remember? We used to look things like that up all the time. He rescued me and took care of me day and night. I looked far worse when he first got to me. He had to take me to the bathroom and stay in the room with me because I couldn’t sit on a toilet alone, or take a shower by myself. I was completely dependent on him. Once I’m not, that part of him that maybe needs that …”
“Don’t. Gino is many things, but he isn’t a liar. If he says he wants you, you can bet that he does. He isn’t a man to deceive himself. Not ever. He knows exactly what he’s looking for. He’s had the time to figure that out. If he wanted someone else, Zara, he’d have her already. And I can’t believe I’m taking his side.”
“That’s because you love me and you want me to be happy. You know Gino makes me happy.” Zara sent her a smile. “He does. Very happy. I feel safe when I’m with him and cared for. Loved even, although he hasn’t said he loves me, but he gets this look on his face sometimes when he’s looking at me.”
“He can’t help but love you, silly.”
“So.” Zara took a deep breath. She had to get this done. “I did tell him about the information I stole from Cheng’s computers. He wants to tell Trap and Wyatt so they can help figure out how to extract it. I didn’t want to let him do that until I talked to you. If you say Ezekiel will help without moving that information up the chain of command, then of course you have to tell him. I need to know if you think Trap and Wyatt are okay to tell.”
“Zeke would tell Joe if he thought it was absolutely necessary and that we could protect you, otherwise, no, not if you didn’t want him to. Trap and Wyatt are renegades. Like Gino, they go their own way. Joe has a tough time reining them in. Truthfully, all the men in this unit are a little bit renegade.”
“You’re sure about Ezekiel?”
Bellisia nodded. “Truthfully, he’s as rogue as the others. I think GhostWalkers just are, Joe included, although because he has to lead, he has fewer choices. He has to bring things to the major general. Gino protects him, so it stands to reason he wouldn’t give him this information about you. It would put Joe in a terrible position. Trap’s impressive. He might be a difficult man, but he comes up with innovative ideas that are far ahead of our time. The strides he’s made in the medical world are amazing. Believe me, Zara, no one will have to explain PEEK-carbon and nanotubes to him, or whatever you were talking about.”
Zara found herself laughing with relief. She should have known Bellisia would forgive her and help her immediately. It was her own insecurities that kept making things between them difficult. She had to stop or she’d end up ruining every relationship she had. She’d be fulfilling Whitney’s prophecy through her own stupidity.
“Do you really understand all that stuff?” Bellisia asked. “Because I looked it up and half the article sounded like a foreign language.”
“You’d understand if you wanted to, you just have no interest in it. You’re all about other things.”
“You got that right.” Bellisia glanced toward the screen door. “Do you think they’re ever going to be bringing us that strawberry lemonade? No one makes it better than Nonny.”
“I think they’re waiting for a signal that we’re finished with our talk,” Zara pointed out, unable to keep the laughter away.
Bellisia laughed with her and then lifted her voice. “Zeke, Gino, where’s the lemonade? We might die of old age before you get out here.”
“At least of thirst,” Zara corrected. “Although it was sweet of them to disappear so we could talk.”
“Zeke might want to run, thinking about the two of us locking horns,” Bellisia said. “But I’m surprised Gino didn’t have an ear to the screen. He’s all protective of you.”
The screen opened and Gino came out carrying a beer and a frosty, tall glass of strawberry lemonade. Right behind was Ezekiel with the same.
“I was listening at the screen,” Gino said, unrepentant. “Did you think I was going to let my woman get upset without me close?”
“I wasn’t,” Ezekiel said, his tone saintly. “I did my best to pull him away, told him if the two of you got into a catfight, then I’d come watch, just for the entertainment, but otherwise, no way. I didn’t want my ass kicked by a girl.”
“I would have kicked your ass,” Bellisia said, taking the glass. “But because you were so good, I’ll just kiss you instead.”
“Did you really eavesdrop on our conversation?” Zara asked, trying to glare and not succeeding because he looked so Gino. Gorgeous in that rough way of his. So … hers. And she didn’t really care in the least.
“Yep. Every word, princess. Good thing you’re not in trouble for saying anything nasty about me.”
Bellisia regarded him over her glass. “Eavesdroppers never hear good of themselves.”
“‘Awesome’ is the word that I think best describes me.” He brushed a kiss on Zara’s forehead and then slipped into his favorite place in the shadows where he could keep an eye on their surroundings even as he joined in their conversation.
Zara opened her mouth, but closed it, uncertain what she wanted to say. Gino sent her an unapologetic grin that kind of melted her. She glanced at Bellisia, who had one eyebrow up and a look that said, “see.”
Zara realized she did see. Bellisia would have been angry with Ezekiel and maybe rightly so. She wasn’t in the least upset with Gino, although clearly Bellisia thought she should be. She considered that while Bellisia explained to her husband that Zara spied on businesses for Whitney and how it was done. Zara knew other women would be really angry with their spouse or boyfriend for blatantly eavesdropping on a private conversation, so how come she wasn’t?
“It was private,” Zara finally said, half whispering.
Gino shrugged. “Maybe, but someone has to look out for you. The last time you cried for a long time. That wasn’t happening a second time.”
She looked up at Gino, her heart sinking. Maybe something really was wrong with her because he made her feel loved and protected. He made her feel safe and like he would fight for her if she couldn’t fight for herself. Was it so wrong to feel that way? She honestly didn’t know. She pressed the frosty glass to her forehead, trying not to feel anything at all. Bellisia wasn’t trying to make her feel like a fool for not caring that Gino had listened.
“Baby.” Gino was suddenly crouched down in front of her, his hands cupping her face. His thumb slid over her lower lip. “Look at me, Zara. Only at me.”
His voice turned her inside out. He could sound so completely gentle, so tender, at odds with his tough image. She forced her lashes up so she could look into those black, fathomless eyes of his. What she saw there shook her. Took her breath. For the first time, there was no doubt in her mind what he felt. It was there in his eyes. Not lust like she’d seen several times. Not a mixture of lust and love, which she thought she’d seen the night before. Just plain love. She might have never had it from a man before, but she recognized it.
Everything in her settled. All the doubts were swept away. He’d told her their relationship belonged to them, no one else. Bellisia obviously had a good relationship with her man. It was different than Zara’s with Gino because they were different. Neither was wrong or right, just different and that was okay. She let her breath out, the last of the knots in her stomach unraveling.
He kissed her gently, his lips brushing over hers, sending a million butterflies winging their way to her deepest core. “Tell me you’re okay. I can take you for a drive if you feel you need to get away for a little while.”
She brushed at the strands of hair falling around his face. She loved the way his hair seemed impossible to tame. “I’m good, Gino.”
“You really upset over me listening?”
She knew what he was saying. If she said yes, they would be talking about it more, but he wouldn’t back down. She shook her head. “I’ll tell you if I need total privacy.”
He frowned at her. “Remember what we agreed, baby. You think about that. We don’t have secrets.”
“You’ll have them,” Bellisia said.
“Okay, baby, that’s enough,” Ezekiel said. “I’m done with this weird shit you’re pulling because you’re not one hundred percent behind your girl with Gino. He’s a good man. He’s in love with her. They can work out their own relationship.”
Bellisia shook her head and looked down. Ezekiel instantly put his hand on her shoulder to comfort her. She lifted her head and looked at the couple. “I’m sorry, Zara. Gino. I don’t know why I’m so afraid for you, Zara. I’m trying to feel it’s right, but there’s a part of me that knows you’re very vulnerable and fragile. Not just now, all the time.”
Before Zara could say anything, Gino sank back on his heels. That put him eye to eye with Bellisia. “I know she is,” he conceded. “I saw it right away. She’ll never have to worry when she’s with me. She’ll learn that eventually, but we’re still new. She’s getting there. I’m glad she had you to look out for her when she was at Whitney’s compound. I’m glad you’re here to be her family with me. When I’m away, I’ll know you’ll have her back, and when you’re away, you’ll know I have it.”
Bellisia glanced up at her husband and then looked back to Gino. She nodded. “Thank you for being so understanding. It’s difficult to let go of that role.”
Zara cleared her throat. “I’m right here in case no one noticed.”
Gino stood, leaned down to brush a kiss over the top of her head and then disappeared once more into the shadows. “Princess, I always know exactly where you are.”
“I want to talk about the storage unit you have in your head. It’s pretty damned innovative, Zara,” Ezekiel said. “I’m with Gino, I think we should bring Trap and Wyatt in on this and if you don’t mind, I can talk to them tonight. Trap will have all kinds of questions for you to answer. Who would ever conceive of anyone planting an SSD in the brain?”
Zara nodded. “If Whitney hadn’t gone off the rails, he’d be so far ahead of the competition, the United States would never have to worry about losing the cyber war, or the one on the ground.” She realized what she’d said after the words came out of her mouth. Whitney had really gone off the rails, he was insane. His genius had corrupted him. She was no longer willing to listen to his voice in her head telling her she was inferior, that she wasn’t good enough for him, a failure and a coward.
“It’s pretty cool that you can ‘talk’ to machines,” Ezekiel said. “Trap may ban you from his beloved laboratory. Wyatt’s is first-class, but you have to see Trap’s. It’s state-of-the-art. Once he and Wyatt disappear into that lab, we all know we might not see them for a week.”
The others laughed, but she didn’t. She understood. She knew what it was like to be so passionate about her work that she couldn’t break for something as mundane as eating or sleeping. She’d holed up for more than a week a few times. When she’d been in her teens, Whitney had locked her in the lab and told her she couldn’t come out until she’d solved the problems he’d put in front of her. She’d learned that behavior from those earlier days. First it had been Whitney keeping her there, but then she wanted to be there. She loved the various projects she worked on, and she could escape into her work.
Zara felt Gino’s eyes on her and she slowly raised her gaze to his. He sent her a slight smile, but his eyes weren’t smiling as he gave a slight shake of his head. A small shiver went through her. She knew what that headshake meant. He wouldn’t have her staying for a week in a lab or anywhere else doing research. She would be coming in at night and sharing their table and their bed. He’d already made that clear to her.
Did she mind? She thought about that too. Not really. Again, she saw it as caring, the opposite of the way Whitney had treated her, or the way she knew Zhu would. Zhu would be like Whitney, force her to work no matter what if Cheng wanted something from her. If she wanted to work late, she was certain Gino would come to her, probably with food. His kisses would be enough to distract her into going to bed with him. She sent him a reassuring smile.
Gino never really looked tense, but she was beginning to read him after spending so many days and nights with him. He definitely relaxed when she smiled at him. She tried to keep her attention on what Ezekiel was saying. He was attempting to help, and it was important to remove the data from the storage unit so Whitney would lose interest in her.
“I love the idea of PEEK-carbon being used. It’s completely translucent. The idea that you can walk into any lab and steal data right out of a computer without a single person having a clue you took it is extraordinary. Add building an SSD out of the nanotube of PEEK-carbon, and you’re the ultimate spy.”
Zara felt her body tensing up. Ezekiel had a lot of clout in the unit. He was an officer. She knew Gino was one as well, but Ezekiel had been running the rescue mission, and like Joe, his word was law. If he decreed she had to go retrieve data from somewhere, or suggested she do that for his major general, she would be in trouble. She’d be forced to continue a life she detested.
She loved her work on artificial intelligence. She saw it as the future—something that could really help mankind. She didn’t mind talking about it with others equally as enthusiastic, or those wanting to learn. If she was stealing from those people, she felt tense and sick. There was no way to have light conversation when she knew she’d stolen their hard work just so Whitney or someone in the government could piggyback on the work others had done. She sat still, frozen in place, feeling threatened. Ezekiel’s enthusiastic voice receded as she stared out to the river.
She needed a porch on her house. She began building it in her mind. It was the first time she didn’t count or do math problems to go somewhere safe. She built her home. A two-story house with wide sweeping stairs. Little alcoves along the way where she could put pictures of the children. A closet under the stairs where she could put their backpacks and jackets—although she was in the swamp so the humidity might stop them from having to wear jackets. She’d have to ask Nonny.
“Princess.” Gino’s voice was low. Gentle. It cut through the large living room she was putting together in her mind. She looked up at him. “Zeke isn’t going to throw you to the wolves. Neither is Trap or Wyatt. We’ve all had our share of shit, baby. Bellisia, and if we ever find your friend, Shylah, and you, have had too much as well. We’re building something here together. Homes. Family. We look out for one another. You’re mine, and baby, make no mistake about it, nothing will ever touch you like that again. I’m a hunter. It’s what I do best.”
“Did something I say upset you, Zara?” Ezekiel said.
She heard the genuine concern in his voice. It was impossible not to see it on his face. “I think I’m still a little afraid of everything, Zeke.” Deliberately she used the shortened, friendlier version of his name. “I never want to have to steal from people again. It felt wrong when I was doing it and even though I have the gift, I’d rather find better uses for it.”
“Tell me you won’t mind screwing with Trap,” Ezekiel said. “Wouldn’t that be great, Gino, to pull a prank on him just once and he wouldn’t be able to figure it out?”
“When you confessed, and eventually you’d have to, he’d probably shoot you,” Gino pointed out and took a long slow pull of his beer.
“It would be worth it.”
“After Trap shot you, he’d have Cayenne roll you up in silk and hang you from a tree upside down. All the others would laugh and point and take pictures to send to the other GhostWalker teams before he relented and got you down, fixed your wound and then dumped some kind of burning liquid into it just to remind you not to fuck with him.”
“You’re right, damn it. He’d do all that.”
The two men grinned at each other. Bellisia and Zara exchanged a look.
“Are they joking?” Zara asked, needing confirmation, because it didn’t sound like they were.
“Nope,” Ezekiel said. “That’s Trap.”
“And Cayenne will do anything for that man, even take one of us down if she has to,” Gino pointed out.
“I believe your woman threatened to end me,” Ezekiel said.
Gino took another drink from the bottle. “True. She can get wild on me, but if I recall, it was only after your woman threatened to do me in permanently for a very small indiscretion.”
“It wasn’t small,” Bellisia chimed in. She sipped at her lemonade. “You were trying to get into my sister’s very pretty undies. She always wears really pretty underwear, which just pissed off Whitney, but he gave up throwing them out.”
“I brought home underwear for you and the others every time I came back,” Zara said, piously, loving that she was part of the camaraderie. “And really, should we be talking about my underwear? I came with zero pairs.”
Bellisia feigned horror. “Are you telling me that you’re going commando right this minute? Zeke, cover your ears.”
“You were the one who brought up my panties and how Gino wanted in them,” Zara said. “And I have plenty. Gino has very good taste in underwear and other … delicate garments.”
“Gino, you are a despicable kind of man,” Ezekiel said. “Looking to get into your woman’s underwear.”
“It wasn’t her underwear I was looking to get into,” Gino clarified.
Ezekiel raised his beer to his friend, and Gino raised his back before they drank. Bellisia and Zara laughed together over the ridiculous conversation. Zara was just happy that she and her beloved “sister” had come to an understanding.