Bethany swept shards of broken glass and splintered wood into the pile she’d already amassed in the corner, muttering obscenities under her breath. The few customers left in the bar were clustered across the room in a section left reasonably untouched by the fight; wisely, they were all drinking quietly and keeping their heads down. Nobody wanted to mess with Bethany when she was in this mood.
While some of her curses were aimed at Alexei, she saved most of the choice words for herself. She was an idiot. It wasn’t as though she didn’t know better, with Calum as a role model. She’d grown up with a man who dealt with his frustrations by drinking and brawling, and yet she’d still somehow let herself feel even the tiniest sliver of attraction to a man who’d made no secret of the fact that he was exactly the same. Okay, maybe more than a tiny sliver.
The truth was, she’d been halfway to falling for him, even though he was completely different from the calm, controlled type she normally went for - boring, predictable, and completely safe, everything that Alexei wasn’t.
Just because he’d been gentle with a pregnant dog and surprisingly good with her father, that was no reason to believe he was anything other than the wild man he’d seemed to be on that first day he’d walked into The Hook and Anchor. She was a thrice-damned empty-headed shit-for-brains fool, that’s what she was. It was a wonder they’d ever let her into Harvard Law School, much less almost allowed her to graduate. She was a moronic nincompoop.
And she had four broken tables and nine smashed chairs to prove it. She’d bang her head against the bar a couple of times, but with her luck, she’d just crack that too.
First thing in the morning, she was going to call the agency and beg for another aide. Then she was going to kick Alexei Knight out of her guest house and out of her life. Absolutely, positively, resolutely. That was the plan, and she was sticking to it.
* * *
Alexei sent the neighbor lady home early, got Calum comfortably ensconced in front of the television in his pajamas watching one of his favorite crime dramas, and then went outside to sit on the back steps with Lulu. He left the door open a crack so he could hear if Calum yelled for him, even though he was pretty sure that the old man’s bellow was audible three houses away.
“I really screwed things up this time, Lulu,” Alexei said, giving her an illicit treat. Bethany said the dog was supposed to be on a very specific diet until the puppies were born - which ought to be any day now - but Alexei figured that all pregnant women deserved a little treat now and then.
The Great Dane mouthed the biscuit daintily then lowered herself to the ground with a sigh, large paws resting on Alexei’s similarly oversized motorcycle boots. He rubbed her ears absently, still brooding.
He didn’t know what he was more upset about; that he’d wrecked the bar, or that he really hadn’t had fun doing it. In a way, both issues were equally upsetting.
The truth of the matter was, in all the years that he and his brothers had spent brawling and fighting, he’d never really considered the damage they’d left behind. Never really thought about Human lives at all, except in the context of whatever job the Baba Yagas had them doing. They’d always been on the move and he’d never had time to get attached to any one place or any one Human. Not that he was attached now. Not really. No, not at all. He barely knew Bethany. And she was a Human, for heaven’s sake. But still. At least this time he was able to see the after effects of what he’d done, and he didn’t much like it. Didn’t much like himself right this very minute, and it wasn’t his nature to think about things that way.
He felt terrible about wrecking Bethany’s place when she’d been nothing but good to him. But that was only part of the problem. Because if drinking and fighting didn’t make him happy anymore, he had no idea what to do with the rest of his life.
Alexei groaned, resting his head in his hands. This was why he’d never wanted to think about things too much. It made his skull pound, and put a funny hollow feeling in the pit of his stomach.
“What did you do now?” a deep growly voice asked. A rough tongue swiped across his cheek.
Alexei sighed. He hadn’t made up his mind if he believed the dog was actually talking to him, or if it was just a symptom of his new mortality, a sign that he was, as the Humans said, “losing it.” Of course, considering that after they were changed by Brenna’s evil magic, his brother Mikhail became a shapeshifter and Gregori developed powerful psychic abilities inherited from his shamaness mother, Alexei supposed anything was possible.
“I made a mess at the bar and Bethany is mad at me,” he explained to Lulu. “Hell, I don’t blame her. I’m mad at myself.”
Another lick followed by a huge, stinky dog-breath yawn. “When I make a mess, I just look sad and she forgives me. You look sad. Girl forgive you too?”
“I don’t think it’s going to be that simple, Lulu.” Alexei fished another treat out of his pocket.
The smart thing to do would be to just move on. This was only ever supposed to be temporary anyway. Bethany would find someone else to deal with the cantankerous old man - although maybe not someone who could get him to eat right or do his exercises. Still, that wasn’t Alexei’s problem. He was just passing through on the way to someplace better. Someplace without a feisty flame-haired dynamo who could stand toe to toe with him. He’d find someone else to watch across the room when she wasn’t looking, just to catch a glimpse of that dimpled smile. And as for Lulu…he didn’t care if he never saw her puppies born.
Okay, that one was definitely a lie.
“I don’t suppose you could have your babies tonight, before I go?” he said to the Great Dane.
Lulu gave him a sad-eyed look. “Man go?” She whined, resting her head heavily on top of her paws. “No. No go.”
“I wish I knew if you were really talking to me,” Alexei said. He could call one of the Baba Yagas and ask for their opinion, but he wasn’t ready to face them yet. Not when he’d let them down so badly. Because of him, they had to fight all their battles alone now, with no Riders at their sides.
No, he couldn’t call any of them, not tough and cranky Barbara, who would probably tell him he was crazy and it served him right. Or sweet Beka, who would say something New Age about the universe speaking to him through nature’s creatures, or Bella, whose red hair and fiery temper just made him think of Bethany.
That only left two people he could ask. The two he had let down the most. The two he couldn’t imagine ever being able to look in the eye again, but didn’t know how to live without.
“I miss my brothers,” he admitted to Lulu. The hollow feeling in his stomach moved up into his chest, settling there like a stone. A boulder, more like.
She whined again. “Call?” she said. “Talk?”
Alexei fingered the cell phone in the inside pocket of his leather jacket. The Riders had never used such things, and Barbara hated them. But when the evil former Baba Yaga Brenna had stolen the Riders’ immortality, rendering them Riders no more, it had also broken the bond that had allowed the Baba Yagas to communicate with the brothers through the symbols permanently attached to their bodies. His dragon tattoo was nothing more than decorative now.
While they were still all healing in the Otherworld, Beka had created a mix of technology and magic; as the youngest and newest of the Babas, this was something that came much more naturally to her than to the others. Messengers had delivered the cell phones to each of the broken Riders, with all of their numbers and those of the Baba Yagas already programmed in, and the information that the spell that powered them meant they would work anywhere and never need to be recharged.
Alexei had never even turned his on. He had nothing to say to anyone. Nothing except “I’m sorry I failed you,” and that seemed inadequate under the circumstances.
Now he took it out and stared at it. He’d meant to throw it away a million times. Had even tossed it into the ocean once, back when he was on the west coast. But the waves had brought it back to his feet, and the magic apparently meant it was waterproof as well, which made sense since Beka was a surfer and spent so much time at the shore.
But maybe it was time to finally put it to use. And under the circumstances, there was only one clear choice for who to call. After patting Lulu on the head one more time for moral support, he powered it up and then touched the icon that said “Gregori.”
* * *
The calm, melodic voice on the other end said, “Hello, Alexei,” and didn’t sound surprised at all, despite the fact that they’d had no contact in almost a year. Alexei wasn’t sure it if that was just Gregori being Gregori - he almost always sounded serene, even in the middle of a sword fight with ten-foot-tall fire-belching ogres - or if his brother’s new psychic abilities had predicted this phone call. In the end, it didn’t much matter.
For a minute, Alexei couldn’t think of what to say. So many words tumbled over each other in his mind, spilling into his mouth and choking him until he couldn’t talk at all. He hadn’t realized until this very minute how hard it had been to spend so long without contacting the brothers he’d spent centuries with, since they were all children of varying ages playing in the realms of the gods.
“Alexei?” Gregori repeated. “Are you there?”
“More or less,” Alexei mumbled. “Hello, Gregori.”
His brother’s low chuckle crossed the many miles between them. “How are you, you big lout? And where are you? We were beginning to think you’d disappeared off the ends of the earth.”
“Close enough,” Alexei said. He could hear the ocean from where he sat, although he’d have to walk down the road to actually put his feet in it. “And I’m…okay, mostly. You?”
“I am well. Still adjusting to all the changes in my life, but well enough, for all of that. Content. Happy, even.” His brother paused for a moment. They’d never been an emotional bunch, or talked much about their feelings. “Are you happy, Alexei?”
Alexei snorted, making Lulu jump and give him a disgruntled look. “How would I know? I don’t even know who I am anymore.”
“Ah. That explains the call, I expect. Has something happened?” Another pause. “Have you discovered what your new gift is?”
“Pfft.” Alexei scowled into the night sky. “Gift. Is that what we’re calling our brother turning into a big green creature and you suddenly being able to predict the future? Gifts? I’d rather have a bottle of vodka and a nice box of chocolates.”
“Wouldn’t we all?” Gregori said lightly. But Alexei had heard through the paranormal grapevine of how hard his brother had had to fight to come to terms with his new talent. It had almost killed him, if the reports were right.
“I suppose so.” Alexei took a deep breath. “Um, do you think hearing a dog talk could be my gift? Or is that just crazy?”
He could practically see the raised eyebrow through the phone.
“A dog? Or all of them?”
Alexei glanced at Lulu, who simply yawned back at him, uninterested in the fact that his life was unraveling. “Only one so far. A very pregnant Great Dane.”
“I see,” Gregori said. “And what does she say?”
“Well, she told me to call you.”
Gregori laughed quietly. “Then she is either the voice of your subconscious, or a very smart dog.”
“Isn’t there some way to find out which one it is?” Alexei asked, only a touch plaintively.
“Have you tried talking to any other animals?” his brother asked. “That might tell you something.”
“Bad enough I’m having conversations with one,” Alexei grumbled. “Besides, I’m at the end of the world. Not many animals here, although I suppose there are other dogs and cats and such.” He thought for a moment, then said more cheerfully, “And maybe a kraken. I wonder if I could talk to a kraken.”
“A kraken?” Gregori repeated. “Have you - no, of course you haven’t.”
There was a moment of silence when they both thought about the days when it would have been automatic to contact one of the Baba Yagas if they ran into something odd and paranormal. Those days were over now, blown away like so much dust in the wind.
“Not my business,” Alexei growled. “Besides, I haven’t seen it. Just heard a story and saw a giant sucker mark on a dead fish. Might be nothing.”
“Uh huh.” Gregori sighed. “Leave it to you to stumble across trouble even at the ends of the world, wherever that is.”
“Cape Cod,” Alexei said, not sure why he was so reluctant to tell his brother where he was. After all, it wasn’t as though he was staying. “But I’m leaving soon.”
Another pause while his brother - always the smartest of them all - processed what he’d heard, and what he hadn’t heard. “You don’t sound all that happy about it,” Gregori said finally. “Are you finally getting tired of traveling from place to place? Nothing wrong with that, if you are. Mikhail and I are both finding it surprisingly pleasant to finally set down roots. Endlessly moving isn’t quite as attractive as it used to be when we had forever to do it in. And the Baba Yagas to do it for.”
Alexei sighed. “Maybe. A little bit. There’s this woman. Well, and the dog, and the woman’s father, and a bar…” His voice trailed off when he thought about the bar. Damn it.
“This woman, you like her?” Gregori sounded torn between amusement and concern. “She’s a Human?”
“Bah,” Alexei said. “I wouldn’t say I like her. She drives me nuts. I’m helping to take care of her father, who also drives me nuts. The dog is nice. I like the dog.” Lulu reached up and licked his face. “Aw, cut it out, Lulu. That’s disgusting.”
“Is Lulu the woman?” Gregori asked. “In which case, should you be on the phone right now? It sounds like you’re busy.”
Alexei rolled his eyes. “Lulu is the dog, and she just gave me a stinky dog kiss. Bethany is the woman, and she runs her father’s bar for him, since he broke his back. I’m um, kind of helping out with him. Just for now, because she’d giving me a place to stay for free. Besides, he’s a stubborn old man, and you know how I like a challenge.”
This time the silence on the other end of the phone went on a little longer.
“Let me get this straight,” his brother said finally. “You found yourself a woman who runs a bar. That sounds pretty perfect for you. And you’re taking care of her disabled father, which sounds slightly out of character, but I’ve seen you do odder things. So what’s the problem?”
“How do you know there is one?” More silence, flavored this time with the air of a knowing older brother. “Fine, fine, you win. There might be a small problem. I might have kind of trashed the bar tonight.”
“Alexei!”
“Hey, we used to wreck bars all the time. And the other guy started it.” Alexei kicked a pebble with the toe of his boot. “But Bethany is furious with me, and I don’t blame her. She told me the first night I got here not to get into any fights in her place, and I just kind of forgot. You know, for a second, it felt like old times.” Except that you weren’t there. But he couldn’t say that.
“So what are you going to do?” Gregori asked, more gently than Alexei felt like he deserved.
He shrugged, even though his brother couldn’t see it. “Leave, I guess. She’s probably going to kick me out as soon as she gets home anyway.”
“I thought you were helping with her father. Doesn’t she need you?”
“She needs me not to wreck her damned bar, that’s what she needs,” Alexei said, wishing he could kick himself instead of the stupid pebble.
“Do you want to stay?” Gregori asked. “Because it kind of sounds to me like you do.”
Alexei mumbled something that might have been an assent.
“Then maybe you should offer to fix the things you broke,” his brother suggested. “You screwed up, then stay and fix it. You always were good with your hands. Apologize to the woman, make it better, and don’t do it again. Maybe do something symbolic to show how sorry you are.”
Huh. Gregori always managed to make things sound so simple and reasonable. That used to aggravate the crap out of Alexei, but this time he was kind of grateful. Assuming, of course, that he could find some tools, and that Bethany would listen to him long enough to let him make the offer. He thought it was more likely that she’d throw things at him until he was bleeding and lying on the ground. Well, he was tough. He could take it.
“Yeah, okay. I’ll give that a try, I guess. Thanks.”
“What are older brothers for?” Gregori said lightly. “And keep me posted on the talking dog thing, will you? It doesn’t sound as perilous as what Mikhail and I went through, but you want to be careful nonetheless.”
“Huh.” Alexei glanced down at Lulu, lying at his feet and panting, her swollen belly making her look ungainly and uncomfortable. “Somehow I don’t think I’m in any danger from a pregnant Great Dane, but I’ll try and stay alert.”
Gregori chuckled. “You do that. And Alexei?”
“Yes?”
“It was nice to talk to you. Try not to make it so long the next time, please.”
“Maybe,” Alexei said. “And Gregori, I, um, I’m sorry.”
“Sorry for what?” his brother asked, sounding genuinely baffled. “For not calling? We’ve all had to deal with this change in our own way.”
“No, not for that. For not protecting you and Mikhail from Brenna, when we were all trapped in the cave. I let you both down, and I’m sorry.” Alexei rubbed one hand over his eyes, which prickled strangely. Must be some strange side effect from the sea air.
“You did not let us down,” Gregori said. “Why would you think that?”
“I’m the strongest,” Alexei said simply. “I should have been able to break us out. I should have been able to beat one small, aged witch. But I didn’t. I wasn’t strong enough. And so you and Mikhail had to endure unending torture. It was my fault.”
“Oh, Alexei. Is this why you have been avoiding us all?” Gregori’s voice sounded immeasurably sad. “You were tortured just as much. I still remember when you held on to those magically reinforced bars to distract Brenna, even though your fingers burned and your skin melted. If strength alone could have gotten us out, you would certainly have done it, my large brother. Don’t you think that Mikhail blamed himself for being tricked by Brenna and get us all caught in the first place? Or that I felt as though I should have been able to outsmart her?”
Alexei had never considered that his brothers might feel as guilty, as responsible as he did. “But, it wasn’t your fault. Not either of you. The witch was just too powerful. And too evil.”
“Exactly,” Gregori said. “Too much for even your immense strength to overcome. Please do not blame yourself. We all survived - and now we are both less and yet somehow more than what we once were. It is what it is. The only thing left is to figure out what you want to be now that you cannot be who you were.”
“What if I have no idea what that is?” Alexei asked.
“Perhaps it might be good to start with the woman who drives you nuts. At the very least, it sounds like it should be entertaining.”
Alexei was fairly certain that was laughter he heard in his brother’s voice.
“I’ll think about it,” he said.
“Perhaps you might also think about contacting Mikhail and the Baba Yagas,” Gregori said. “They all miss you too.”
Alexei sighed. “Not yet, Gregori. I’m just not ready.”
“Very well,” his brother said. “Then I hope you will call me again. If nothing else, I am curious to hear whether or not you can talk to animals now.”
“He can,” Lulu barked.
“Not helping,” Alexei muttered. “We’ll see,” he said to Gregori. “But thanks for the advice.” He ended the call and sat there for a minute, then heaved himself up and went into the house to ask Calum if he happened to have any woodworking tools lying around. You know, just in case Bethany didn’t kick him out the minute she came home.
Plus, he needed a pair of scissors. He was going to do something symbolic. It remained to be seen if Bethany would understand just how deeply symbolic it was.