32.
DANIEL
“Daniel, Elizabeth Lyons is on line one for you.” Serena’s voice came through the speaker on my phone.
“Thank you. I’ll take it. And, Serena? Go home,” I responded before pressing down the button for line one.
“Babe!” My voice came out overly excited and I wanted to smack myself. This woman turned me into a child.
“I wasn’t sure you’d still be at the office.” She sounded off, and my stomach fell to the floor with the innate knowledge.
“You okay? What’s the matter?”
I waited as she inhaled a single breath. My knees started to bounce under my desk as I feared what was about to spill from her lips—the lips that I had kissed, tasted, and loved just this morning.
“I’ve just had a really long and weird day.” Her tone was riddled with avoidance and distance—two things I wanted least of all from her.
“What else? Something’s on your mind. I can sense it.”
“I just needed to tell you that I have a production deadline, and I’m not going to be available for the next few weeks.”
“What does that mean? I can’t see you for a few weeks? That’s okay, babe. We’ll have lots of phone sex,” I said with a laugh, hoping to lighten the mood.
She didn’t laugh back.
“I just can’t have you coming down here unannounced and stuff while I have this big project on the line, okay? Promise me that you won’t show up here without my permission.” Her voice pleaded and she sounded desperate and nervous.
“Elizabeth,” I all but begged, “what’s really going on?”
I almost booked the plane in those moments where she remained silent. I hated the fact that I couldn’t see her face, or look into her eyes, when I knew something wasn’t right.
“I had a shitty day, okay? I got in trouble during my first meeting. Ben came to see me for lunch, and then Kate wouldn’t stop calling my office.”
“Wait. Slow down.” I almost coughed on my words. “You got in trouble? What happened?”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Okay. Tell me about Ben then.” I tried to pull any information from her that she would give me.
“He tried to tell me that he needed closure between us. It was stupid, time-consuming, and ridiculous, but I’m pretty sure he’s over it. I think he just needed to get some stuff off his chest after running into me the other night. It’s no big deal.”
I started fuming at the idea of Ben being able to see her when I wasn’t around. I hated that he could be there when I couldn’t be. It burned me to no end. “He came to the studio?”
“For lunch. It was fine. Thirty minutes was all the time I gave him,” she announced sternly.
I huffed out an irritated breath. “Fine. What’s this shit about Kate? Why was she calling you?”
“Exactly, Daniel.”
“Exactly what?” I asked, slightly confused.
“Why the fuck is your ex-girlfriend, or whatever the hell she is, calling me at my office over and over again?” Her voice was laced with venom, and I couldn’t stand knowing that it was directed at me.
“I have no idea. What did she say?”
A disgusted laugh filtered through the phone line. “She actually asked me to stop seeing you. Said she couldn’t handle you breaking up with her. You won’t talk to her, and she’s desperate to talk to you. I don’t know, Daniel. She was hysterically crying during the whole phone call, talking about how she is so in love with you.”
I pulled at my hair as anger ripped through me. Kate had always been the mellow and laid-back type until I’d told her that it was over. She’d flipped her fucking lid that night, and she hadn’t been the same since. I’d blocked her number from my cell and instructed Serena not to put any calls from her through at the office.
“I’m so sorry, Elizabeth. I had no idea that she would behave like that. What do you want me to do?”
“What do I want you to do? What I want you to do is not have girls who are in love with you call me at my fucking job, Daniel! I don’t need this.”
“I’ll put an end to it.”
“It’s too late. It already happened. I didn’t have to deal with any of this crap until you came along. I can’t have this kind of stuff around me. I can’t. I won’t.” Her voice was firm, and I could sense her mind solidifying its stance.
I’d known I might have to deal with this from her, but I hadn’t thought it would be so soon. A woman like Elizabeth needed baby steps when it came to relationships. Even though we’d talked about it, things between us had been rushed. It was hard to stop something that felt this right.
“Don’t do this, Elizabeth. I know what you’re about to do. Don’t do it.”
“I need you to stay away from me, please. I need you to just leave me alone because I don’t know how to balance whatever this is and my job right now. I’m absolutely overwhelmed with everything I feel for you. I can’t lose focus, and you make me lose focus.”
I could hear it in her voice that it was too late. She’d already decided.
“Please don’t do this. I’m begging you not to do this.”
“It’s done.”
She breathed out a breath as I lost mine.
“We’ll work through finding the balance together. You think all these feelings aren’t new to me? I’ve never felt this way about anyone. You’re all I fucking think about all day long. That’s normal, Elizabeth!” I desperately tried to convince her. “It’s natural to feel like this when you’re crazy about someone.”
“Well, it’s not natural for me. I don’t like it. I feel out of control. I can’t be out of control when it comes to this.”
“Elizabeth,” I mumbled under my breath.
“Just let me go, Daniel. Pretend I never entered your life.”
“I could never do that.” I refused to lie to her. “Could you?”
She sniffed, and I half-wondered if she was crying. It would tear me apart if she was.
“I don’t know, but I have to try.”
“I don’t want this. I want to be perfectly fucking clear that this is not what I want. But if it’s what you need, then I’ll do it. I can’t make you want to be with me.” I admitted defeat, knowing that trying to change a strong woman’s mind was like trying to reason with a drunk person. There would be no reasoning tonight.
“Wanting to be with you isn’t the problem.”
“Then, what is?”
“It’s everything else that comes with it. It’s too much for me. I’m not equipped to deal with all the extra crap. I want you—minus the crap.”
I believed her because I knew, in this moment, that she believed the words herself.
“I wish you felt differently.” God, how I wished that more than anything else in the world right now.
“I’m sorry. I don’t. I just don’t know how to do this.”
“Good-bye, Elizabeth.” I ended the call, knowing that if I heard her tell me good-bye, I’d fucking lose it. It was one thing for me to say it because I knew I didn’t mean it. But hearing it from her lips, I knew she would have meant it, and that would have absolutely broken me the fuck apart.