CHAPTER THIRTEEN

Ricky picked me up for breakfast. When we reached his bike, I noticed the bulging saddlebags and the smell of bacon.

“Are you up for a picnic breakfast?” he said. “If you don’t want to eat outside, we could commandeer the meeting room table at Gabriel’s office.”

“No, a picnic is great. Eating out means dining with strangers, and I wasn’t really feeling up to that today.”

“I figured you might want some privacy.”

“I do.” I kissed his cheek before I pulled on my helmet. “Thanks.”

He drove us to the Lincoln Park lily pool. One of my favorite spots. I’d mentioned that to him once. In passing.

The park had just opened for the day, and there was no one else around. Ricky still led me to an out-of-the-way corner, where we could enjoy a view of the pond and the ducks without much danger of interruption.

We were settling in on the rocks when I noticed scrapes and bruises on his knuckles. I caught his hand as he reached into the bag of food.

“Trouble last night?” I asked.

“Mmm, yeah. Minor resistance.”

He busied himself pulling out breakfast sandwiches and a cardboard carton of coffee.

“Did it go okay?” I asked. “You seem quiet.”

“It went fine.” He paused, holding the coffee carton in one hand, the cardboard cups in the other. “Well, the negotiations did. After that . . . I kinda quit the club.”

“What?” My gaze shot to his leather jacket, set on a rock beside us.

“It was temporary. I stormed off, cooled down, went back, and talked to my father. We worked it out. No big deal.”

“Um, yeah.” I took the coffee from him and set it aside. “You quit the club. Even if it didn’t last an hour, that’s an hour too much. I know what the Saints mean to you and what your dad means to you.”

I rubbed my fingers over his shoulder, where he had the Saints patch tattooed on the back.

“Some people will bluff and bluster to get their way,” I said. “Threaten to end a relationship. To quit a job. To drop out of a group. That’s not you.”

He dipped his chin, gaze sliding away from me. I snagged it back. “I’m wrong, right? You were bluffing. Showing Don how angry you were.”

Ricky exhaled. Then he shook his head. “I wanted to show him I was serious, but I wasn’t bluffing. I wouldn’t do that. I was ready to walk away.”

“Wh-what?”

“Shit.” Ricky grabbed my hands and tugged me onto his lap. “This isn’t what I wanted to talk about. Hell, I wasn’t even going to tell you. I planned to come out here and talk about what happened yesterday. To you.”

I twisted to look at him. “If you were seriously ready to quit the club because of our relationship, then we have a problem.”

“The situation just kept escalating, Liv. It’s like putting out tiny fires and, somehow, you’re fanning the flames instead. By not resisting my dad’s interference, I was proving that you weren’t important to me. When I did resist, he gave me an ultimatum. Choosing you was the only way I could say, ‘I’m serious,’ and if that cost me my patch . . .” He went quiet. “I just really hoped it wouldn’t.”

I turned in his lap, arms going around his neck, my kiss telling him everything I couldn’t put into words—how much that near-miss worried me, how badly I didn’t want to come between him and the club, or him and his father, but how badly I didn’t want to lose him, either.

I said all that in the kiss, and when it deepened, urgency and hunger and fear igniting as he pulled me down onto the rocks, I showed him exactly how much he meant to me, and how glad I was to have him.

—

I lay under Ricky as he caught his breath, his eyes threatening to close. When I made a move to slide from under him, he put one hand between my shoulder blades, the other on my rear, and flipped onto his back with me atop him. Then he pulled me down in a slow kiss. When it broke, I tried to back away again. His arms tightened.

“Eager to escape this morning, aren’t you?”

“No. Just thinking I should probably pour us some coffee before we drift off to sleep, half naked, in a public park.”

A languid grin. “Anyone spots us, they’ll steer clear.”

He pulled me back down into a kiss, and I started thinking maybe he had a point. The sun was bright and warm, and it felt so quiet and peaceful. Right up until we heard the distant sound of voices. Kids’ voices. He rolled me over onto my back, saying, “I’ll get that coffee.”

“No,” I said. “I’ll get it . . . along with my jeans.”

While I pulled on my clothes, he propped himself up to watch. I had my own view to enjoy. As fine as Ricky Gallagher looks in clothes, he’s even better without them. He had his jeans still on, pulled up now but unbuttoned, his shirt off as he reclined on his elbows, his sweaty chest glistening in the sunlight.

He smiled. “You keep staring at me like that and I’ll put you on the bike and spirit you off to the cabin early.”

“Spirit away,” I said, bringing back two cups of coffee. “I have the day off.”

He buttoned his jeans. “Seriously?”

“Seriously. A gift from Gabriel, though I suspect he wants me out of his hair so he can get some actual work done. If you have things to do, you can drop me at the office and Lydia will play bodyguard until—”

“My day’s plan was killing time until you’re free.”

“So you want to head up early?”

“Hell, yeah.”

“Anytime you’re ready, then.”

“Not so fast.” He caught my arm as I began to get up. “I want to hear about last night first.”

He sat, and I leaned against his shoulder.

“When I first went to visit Pamela, I prepared myself to see a killer. Someone who’d done terrible things . . . and who’d given birth to me and raised me and was a part of my life while she did those terrible things. I knew that would be difficult to reconcile, but I think my greater fear was that I’d walk into that room and be unable to see a killer. That I’d remember my mother and I’d think, ‘No, she didn’t do it.’”

“And?”

“I tried to hold her crimes in my head, like a barrier. It took effort to keep that wall up, but I managed it, and I came to accept that she could have been a good mother and a murderer. When I found out she wasn’t responsible for the deaths of Jan and Peter, it was . . .” I trailed off, trying to find the right words. “It was a relief,” I said after a moment. “A sign that maybe she could be innocent. But I also knew that I had to steel myself against the possibility that if Gabriel and I keep digging, I’ll find out she killed six people.” I looked at him. “I can’t do that with Todd.”

“Can’t do what?” he asked, his voice soft.

“Keep the wall up. I can’t . . . Damn it.” Tears pricked my eyes. “I can’t find that wall, Ricky. I couldn’t even look at him right away. When he walked in, I was ready to flee, and then I heard his voice and there was no doubt. Everything in me said, ‘This is my father. And my father is not a killer.’”

“You don’t want to think that way.”

“No, I don’t. It makes me feel like a gullible fool. But when I walked out of that visiting room yesterday, all I could think was that we’ve got to move faster on this case, forget everything else and focus on proving them innocent.”

“What did Gabriel say about that?”

“I never told him. The rest of the evening was . . . not exactly conducive to conversation.”

“The bar.”

I looked over.

“I texted him,” he said. “I know you said you were fine, but I wanted to be sure. I asked him to give me a call and when he did, I could hear the music. Not a chance of talking in that place.”

“You spoke to him?”

“Sure. He insisted you were fine, which I suspected you weren’t, but . . . he thought you were doing okay, and I didn’t feel right running over if you’d rather I didn’t.”

Gabriel had told Ricky he shouldn’t come? After I had made it clear—very clear—that I wanted to see him?

“Liv?”

I pushed down the rising anger. “Sorry, just . . . Goddamn it, Gabriel!”

Ricky chuckled. “I’m guessing he missed a few cues that you weren’t fine.”

“Just a few.”

“I’m also guessing that’s why you didn’t talk to him about Todd. It’s one thing if Todd gave you proof he was innocent, but it would be hard to say to Gabriel that you feel he’s innocent. He won’t understand.”

“And he’d think I was being foolish.”

Ricky made a face. “I wouldn’t go that far. He just won’t get it. Either way, maybe you should push harder on your parents’ case—”

The jangle of “Big Boss Man” cut him short. In the past, when that ring tone sounded, Ricky would roll his eyes, but when he answered there was always a warmth in his voice that belied the grumbling. I’m sure I used to do the same when my dad called—no matter how inconvenient the timing, I was always happy to hear from him. Now Ricky tensed, like a deer spotting a shotgun.

“You should answer it,” I said softly.

“I know.” He did, saying, “Hey.” His face stayed tight as he listened and then said, “Actually, we were heading up to the cabin early. Liv has the day off.” As Don replied, Ricky relaxed. “Okay, sure.” A soft laugh. “Yeah, I know. I set out a few traps when we were up the last time.”

I walked to the pond to give him privacy while I checked my own phone. No texts. No messages. A few e-mails, the last from Gabriel. Changing his mind about giving me two days off? God, I hoped not.

I opened Gabriel’s e-mail so I could shoot back a quick response before we hit the road. Then I read his message.

I’ve tried calling, but you aren’t answering your phone. Something urgent has come up. I need you to meet me as soon as possible. It’s in regards to the Larsen case and not something I wish to put in an e-mail. I’ll be at the address below. I’ll expect you there within the hour. This is important, Olivia.

I checked the call log. While it was not impossible that I could have been too, um, preoccupied to hear my phone ring, there weren’t any missed calls. But my cell service fluttered, the bars rising and falling.

I called Gabriel. It went straight to voice mail. I hung up and walked back to Ricky, who was on his feet, tugging on his T-shirt.

“Everything okay?” I asked.

“Yep. I suspect something came up and he was hoping I could get to it before I headed out. When I said we were leaving right away, he just wished us a good trip and asked if I’d pop into town to check messages tonight and tomorrow morning, in case he needs to contact me. Which is protocol anyway.”

“So situation normal?”

“For now. Let’s hope it stays that way.” He looked down at the cell still in my hand.

“Gabriel,” I said.

He swore. I passed over the phone with the message on the screen. As he read it, he swore some more, but said, “You do want to move on your parents’ case. We’ll get this over with and then take off.”