The first night was the hardest.

I was sleeping in his bed, his smell still soaked into the sheets, but his hardness was nowhere in sight. The bed was too big without him, and I found myself reaching for him in the middle of the night in the hope he was there…somewhere.

He left a loaded pistol in the nightstand if I needed it, but he assured me I wouldn’t since he’d changed all the security measures around the building. I was sleeping in a fortress rigged with cameras and alarms.

There was no safer place for me.

He told me not to call him while he was gone. We never spoke when he was on his missions, either because he didn’t want to be compromised, or because he didn’t want anything to be traced back to me.

So I would spend an entire week without seeing him or talking to him.

That felt like a lifetime.

I’d turned into the kind of woman I didn’t want to be…so sickly dependent on my lover that I didn’t know what to do without him. I missed him constantly, and being inside his home just reminded me he wasn’t there.

It was pathetic.

I’d always wanted to fall deeply in love like this…but I didn’t want to be weakened by it.

But I was so weak.

I made a pot of coffee and sat down to enjoy it when my phone rang.

It was my father.

Alarms went off in my head, and a jolt of terror exploded in my heart. I was sitting inside Bones’s place after sleeping all night in his bed. Now I’d have to speak to my father while I was doing the one thing he would despise.

I almost didn’t answer. “Hey, how’s it going?” I tried to be upbeat and cheery despite the sadness in my heart.

“I’m good. What about you, tesoro?”

I looked around Bones’s dining room, the walls covered with artwork instead of pictures. He didn’t have pictures of family or friends anywhere—because he didn’t have any. I was standing in the enemy’s castle, absorbed in his surroundings. “I’m great. I’m excited for Conway to get hitched. He needs to grow up.” Teasing my brother was the best way to seem normal.

My dad didn’t chuckle. “Your mother and I are in Milan today.”

Shit.

“I’m meeting a client for a few hours, and afterward, we were hoping we could get together for dinner. Are you free?”

I loved seeing my parents every chance I got, and since they didn’t want to do anything until that evening, I had time to return to my place and pretend I was still living there. “Yeah, that sounds like fun.”

“Great. We’ll pick you up at six.”

“I’ll see you then.”

“Bye, tesoro.”

I headed back to my place and set up my easel so it made it seem like I was actually living there. I put a few bottles of wine in to chill along with some snacks so my fridge wouldn’t look completely empty. If my parents thought I didn’t have what I needed, they would throw money at me so fast.

I didn’t want their money.

They arrived at six right on the dot. My mom walked inside first, wearing tight jeans and a nice sweater. She beamed when she looked at me, like she hadn’t seen me in months instead of just a week. We were the same height even though she was twice my age, so it made it seem like she was my friend rather than my mother. “Hey, sweetheart. I love it when I see you this often. I wish it were like this all the time.”

“Yeah…me too.” My dream to move back to Tuscany came back to me, and I wasn’t sure how that would ever be possible with Bones. He did his business out of Milan, and being that close to my family would just be dangerous.

Mom pulled away so my father could move in next.

My father gave me the same look every time he saw me, subtle affection mixed with pride. There was love there too, overrun by his other thoughts. “Tesoro.” He wrapped his arms around me and gave me a tight squeeze. “You look nice.”

“Thanks, Father.”

He kissed my forehead before he pulled away. “Are you ready to go?”

“Yep.” I grabbed my purse from the couch and pulled it over my shoulder. “Where are we going?”

We walked outside and headed to the car at the curb.

“Well, we were going to head to your father’s favorite place, but then we got invited over to Alessandro’s place for dinner. We told him we already had plans, but he insisted…” My mother didn’t make eye contact with me, telling me this wasn’t a coincidence.

“Isn’t that Matteo’s father?”

“Yeah…”

Father walked ahead so I narrowed my eyes at her. “Please don’t tell me this was on purpose.”

“It really wasn’t…but I know how it looks. Your father ran into him today, and one thing led to another… I’m not even sure if Matteo will be there.”

I rolled my eyes. “You know how Italian families are. His mother wants him to settle down, like, tomorrow.”

“True,” Mom said. “But I really didn’t do it on purpose. You know your father and I would never pull a stunt like that.”

I believed her. When she first set me up with Matteo, she didn’t pressure me. She just put the idea on the table and let me decide what I wanted to do. Having this dinner made me feel guilty because Bones wouldn’t be happy about it, but I couldn’t tell him because I couldn’t contact him. Unless Matteo wasn’t there, but that was just wishful thinking…

Matteo’s family lived just outside the city in a beautiful home constructed in the typical Mediterranean style. Two stories with lots of olive trees and ivy, it was a beautiful place. The stone walkway reminded me of our home in Tuscany, and the water fountain out front was lightly dripping with water.

We walked inside and were greeted by Alessandro. He shook my father’s hand vigorously then talked a million miles an hour about his excitement for having us over for dinner. His Italian accent was thick and heavy, making his words almost impossible to understand. He kissed my mother on each cheek before he introduced his wife, an Italian woman with beautiful black hair. “This is my wife, Laura. Laura, these are the Barsettis.”

My father kissed her on the cheek, and my mother did the same. When I came up to her next, she smiled wider than she did for anyone else. “Such a beautiful girl.” She hugged me hard, both of her palms hitting my back. “I hear you’re quite the artist.”

From whom? Matteo or my parents? “Yes, it’s my passion.”

“I can tell.” She pointed to the wall where one of my paintings hung. “Beautiful just like you are.”

Reality hit me hard in the chest when I saw that painting. Something I created was actually hanging on someone’s wall, displayed proudly. Not only did someone pay for it, but they thought it was worthy enough to be on the wall of their entryway, so people could see it the second they walked in the door. “Wow…that’s a perfect place for it.” I couldn’t take my eyes off the painting, unable to believe that my dream had really come true. My artwork was on display in someone’s house. They could have put up anything else, but they chose to showcase something I created. It was unbelievable.

Matteo walked into the room when he heard the voices in the entryway. Tall like his father, he wore a black blazer over his black V-neck. His dark blue jeans hung low on his hips and showed his thin and toned legs. He had wide shoulders, and a hint of musculature was visible under his blazer. The hard lines of his face showed his chiseled jaw and masculine features, and his brown eyes looked like two drops of coffee. He moved to my father first and shook his hand. “Nice to see you again, sir.”

I watched my potential suitor shake my father’s hand, and it hurt to know Bones would never do that. Even if he tried, my father wouldn’t reciprocate. Guns would be drawn, and a war would break out.

“You too, Matteo.” My father shook his hand and gave him a slight nod.

Matteo moved to my mother next and kissed her on each cheek. “Mrs. Barsetti, how are you?”

“I’m well, Matteo. Thanks for asking.” She smiled before she drifted away with my father, purposely leaving us alone so we could speak in private.

If that wasn’t my father’s way of giving his approval, I didn’t know what was.

Matteo stood in front of me, wearing a handsome half smile. He watched me like he was amused, his head tilted slightly down so he could meet my gaze. “How are you, Vanessa?” He didn’t lean in and kiss me on each cheek the way he did with my mother. Despite our personal relationship, he touched me even less.

Not that I minded. “I feel like this is a setup.”

He chuckled. “I think the dinner plans were pretty organic. But my mother did call me and demand I get my ass over here even though I was still working…said you would be here. She told me to give you flowers…” He rolled his eyes. “I managed to get her to take it down a notch.”

“Good,” I said in relief. “I’m not really a flower kind of girl.”

“Then what kind of girl are you?” he asked.

I was a bad-boy kinda girl, wanting ink, muscle, and stone-cold eyes. “I prefer things I can eat.”

He chuckled. “Like chocolate?”

“Not necessarily. Anything edible, really.”

“So if I picked you up on a date and brought you a sandwich, you would be impressed by that?”

I laughed because the image was ridiculous. “I guess so.”

“Well, if we ever go on a date again, I’ll keep that in mind.” He turned toward the dining room, walking with me. “How was your day?”

Terrible. Heartbreaking. Depressing. “Okay. Yours?”

“I had a lot of stuff to do at work today. Both restaurants were busy, and one of my managers called in sick.”

“That’s too bad.”

He shrugged. “It stops me from being lazy.”

We went into the dining room and gathered around the table together. I was seated across from Matteo, and I couldn’t help but wonder if even that was on purpose. We held our hands together, prayed, and then dug into the wine, bread, and Tuscan meal Laura had prepared for us. It didn’t seem so awkward when we were all together, but when Matteo kept staring at me across the table, in a similar way to what Bones did, I couldn’t help but feel guilty, like I was betraying Bones even though I wasn’t doing anything wrong.

We said goodbye at the entryway, and then Matteo started to walk me to the car while my parents continued to talk to Alessandra and Laura. Matteo walked with his hands in his pockets, keeping a respectable distance from me. “You should come by one of my restaurants this week. I’ll give you a special tour of the menu. Bring some friends.”

I noticed the way he encouraged me to bring people, like he was doing his best not to make it seem like a date. “I’ll see if they’re free, and I’ll let you know.” I had no intention of doing that, but Matteo was a nice guy and I didn’t want to shut him down coldly.

He stared at me, a slight look of amusement in his eyes. “Don’t make it obvious…but both of our parents are staring at us right now.”

My eye flicked to the front of the house, and of course, he was right. “They’re ridiculous. I thought arranged marriages were from the dark ages.”

“Actually, my parents are the product of an arranged marriage. My father’s parents were friends with my mother’s parents…and that’s just how it happened.”

“Really?” I asked in surprise. “They seem so happy.”

“They are happy. I’ve always known that they love each other…even all these years later.”

I crossed my arms over my chest and broke eye contact, feeling awkward talking about marriage when there was only one man I wanted to be with…but he was the worst choice on the planet. My life would be so much easier if I’d just fallen for the right guy. But no…I had to fall for a murdering psycho. “Give me a call. I’d love to entertain you and some of your friends.”

“Will you bring any friends?”

“Definitely. My guys are always looking for a chance to meet women. But don’t worry, I’ll tell them you’re off-limits.”

My eyebrows rose up my forehead. “Why?”

“You said you aren’t dating, right?” he asked. “I’ll save you the trouble of keeping the dogs away.” He wore his handsome smile, cool and confident. “And maybe so I can call dibs on you…whenever you are ready.”

If Bones heard that, Matteo would be dead right now, shot right between the eyes. I didn’t know where my relationship with Bones was going to go, probably nowhere, but I didn’t want to lead Matteo on. “You really shouldn’t waste your time with me, Matteo. I don’t know when I’m going to be ready, and when I am, I’m not sure if this would even happen.”

He took my coldness in stride. “I don’t think I’m wasting my time. It’s not like I’m putting my personal life on hold in the meantime. I have a date tomorrow night, and my dates usually end the same way. So whatever happens, even if nothing ever comes of it, that’s fine with me. You can never have too many friends, right?”

“True.”

“Goodnight, Vanessa.” He didn’t embrace me before he walked away, keeping his hands in his pockets. He moved back to the house just as my parents walked to the car.

My mom wore a slight smile on her face, and my father didn’t have any expression at all. We got in the car then drove back to my apartment, spending the entire ride in silence. I was tempted never to share this story with Bones, but that psychopath had a way of figuring things out anyway, even if he was in another country pulling off a covert assassination.

We reached my apartment fifteen minutes later, and my parents walked me to the door. My mom hugged me and kissed me goodbye before she stepped away so my father could move in next.

“Button, could you give us a second?” My father opened the front door to my apartment and let me walk inside first.

“Sure,” Mom said. “I’ll wait in the car.”

I stepped inside my living room, unsure what my father wanted to say that he couldn’t say in front of my mother. I had a different relationship with each of my parents, but they never operated in secrecy. I’d always seen them as a united team.

My father sat on one of the couches, right in the area where Bones usually sat when he watched TV. The two men couldn’t be more different from one another. My father had tanned skin and strong Italian features. Bones was white like milk, with bright eyes that looked like the tropical ocean.

I sat beside my father, unsure what he wanted to say. “Everything alright?”

“Yes.” His hands came together, both of his palms flat like he was praying. He usually had a drink in his hand, and when he didn’t, it was like he didn’t know what to do with himself. He looked at the rug on the floor of the living room. “You don’t like him.” I assumed he was talking about Matteo. Otherwise, I didn’t have a clue what he was referring to.

“I wouldn’t say that… He’s very nice. He’s been nothing but respectful toward me.”

“You know what I mean, tesoro.”

My father and I never had these conversations, and now they seemed to be happening more often. It was strange.

“I can intervene if you need me to. I don’t want him to bother you if it’s not something you want.”

“I don’t need you to do anything, Father. I can handle it myself.” He’d always taught me to be strong and independent. I had to fight my own battles and not rely on a man to do it for me. By allowing my father to fix my problems, I wasn’t upholding a lesson he ingrained in me a long time ago. “Matteo is a nice man. I just don’t see him like that, I guess.”

“Because of this other man?”

My heart actually stopped beating. My mother told him about my relationship, but I didn’t expect my father to actually bring it up. When it came to my romantic life, he steered far away.

“Your mother mentioned it,” he said quietly. “Mentioned that you loved him…”

I couldn’t believe this was happening. “Yeah…but he wasn’t right for me.”

“Why not?”

I loved and respected my father, but it felt strange talking about this. Mom was different because she was also my friend. My father would always be the overprotective and terrifying father who chased off any man that looked at me twice. He reminded me of Bones in some ways. “He just wasn’t…”

“Did he hurt you?”

“No, not at all,” I said quickly. “I ended things with him. I didn’t see a future.”

He kept staring at the ground. “I know this is awkward…I’m not trying to make it that way. You usually talk to your mother about these sorts of things, which makes it easier for both of us. But if you’ve really fallen in love with someone, maybe you should trust your instincts.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’re a smart girl…woman.” He closed his eyes for a moment as he corrected himself. “You have high standards for all things. I don’t know this man or what it is about him that you don’t like, but when it comes to love, you don’t have to like everything about him.”

If only my father knew the truth, we wouldn’t be having this conversation.

“There were a lot of things your mother didn’t like about me…but she still loved me.”

My father’s crimes were petty compared to Bones’s.

“I just want you to be happy. When you’re with Matteo, you don’t seem happy…”

The only time I came close to that sense of joy was when Bones looked at me like I was the only thing that mattered. It was when he shared his bed with me, when he sat across from me at the dinner table. I was stupidly and hopelessly in love with a man who despised my family…and being with him made me truly happy. “Again, Matteo is very nice. But I don’t see anything happening with him.”

“Ever?”

I shook my head. “Probably not. It’s not his fault. If we met under different circumstances, it could have had another outcome. But right now…I’m not sure what I want.”

My father rubbed his hands together, his thoughts a mystery. “I’ve always tried to treat you and Conway the same, but honestly, I never have. Conway didn’t bring a woman around to the family until he was almost thirty, and I never questioned him about it. But with you, I’m constantly worried when I shouldn’t be. You’re a very smart and capable young woman. I should just keep my mouth shut the way I did with Conway. But when your mother told me you were in love with someone but ended things, I got concerned. Conway ended things with Sapphire when things got too serious, and I don’t want you to make the same mistake. I should let you figure this out on your own, but naturally, I can’t. I talked some sense into Conway, and I think that helped bring them back together. So now I’m doing the same with you…”

I knew his concern came from a good place, but he had no idea how tense the situation really was. He couldn’t even fathom that I would love a man so wrong for me. That I would be so deeply in love that I couldn’t leave him. “I know you mean well, but…it’s complicated.”

My father nodded slightly, rubbing his palms together. “Can I meet him?”

Only one man would walk out of that situation alive. “I don’t think that’s a good idea…”

“Tesoro, I’ll be on my best behavior.”

My father could be in a coma, and it wouldn’t make a difference. He would still shoot Bones right between the eyes. “I don’t know…”

“Just think about it. That’s all I ask.” He raised his head and looked at me, discomfort in his eyes. “I’ll drop it now. Ball is in your court, tesoro. I just want to give you some advice…it’s rare to fall in love more than once, at least, not with the same intensity. If your mother and I hadn’t ended up together, I know I wouldn’t have ever felt that way again. If you love this man in the same way, you should hold on to it as long as you can. Don’t push him away because you’re scared or because he’s not exactly what you pictured in a husband. I wasn’t what your mother was looking for and I certainly didn’t deserve her, but I’ve become everything she’s ever wanted—because I love her.”

A knock sounded on my door.

It was ten in the evening, and I hadn’t left for Bones’s place yet just in case my parents were still watching the apartment. I knew it wasn’t Bones because he would have told me he was back the second he landed in Italy.

I pulled out the gun Bones gave me and slowly walked to the door, keeping my footsteps muffled as they tapped against the floor. I finally reached the peephole and looked on the other side.

It was Max.

“Open the door already. You sound like a bear when you breathe like that.”

I lowered the gun and opened the door. “What are you doing here?”

“I could ask you the same thing. You know Bones doesn’t want you here.”

“How did you even know I was here?”

He held up his phone to my face. “I’m watching your tracker.”

“Excuse me?” I hissed. I wasn’t even happy about it when Bones started to do it.

“He asked me,” Max explained. “It’s my job to look after you while he’s gone. I’m watching Shane’s wife too…who’s also a pain in the ass.”

“If we’re such pains, why don’t you just ignore us?”

“Can’t do that,” he said simply. “And if I ever leave a lady behind, as much of a pain as she is, Bones better stay on her. So now I’m here to haul your ass back to his place. Had a nice night with your family?”

So he really was watching what I was doing. “I can make it back myself.”

“I’ll follow you anyway. When you’re inside the building, I’ll leave.”

I rolled my eyes and walked back inside. “Now you’re the pain in the ass.”