We were on a complete high. The entire thing had been a success. The handoff to Chandran had gone perfectly, and now we were back at the hotel. I felt like I was on top of the world. Literally, like I could fly. Like I could do anything.

“You were brilliant,” Ryan said, pulling me close to him.

I smiled as I leaned into him, giving him a brief hug. His arms felt perfect around me for that moment, and then I stepped back. “You were great,” I told him, meaning it. “You kept it together and really helped pull this off. It was genius to buy me that diamond.” Though I knew Pauly would be a little pissed. But 30k extra wasn’t here or there. He’d get more for it if he sold it back in the states. It would be easy enough to move legitimately through the club, or he could use it to pay his business associates. People who did shady work were willing to get paid in diamonds. The black market moved a lot of them.

“Earth to Onyx,” Ryan said.

I shook my head. I’d zoned out. “Sorry,” I said. “Too many thoughts.”

He laughed, a real genuine, full-blown chuckle. “Well, let’s take care of that,” he said. And with that, he slipped out the front door of our room, leaving me alone. I was startled, but too excited from the success of our mission to let his abrupt departure bother me.

I went to the bedroom, stripped off my outfit of the day and slipped into my Ravens tee and shorts. I wanted to relax and revel in the glory of our accomplishment and gird myself for tomorrow. We had two more days to wait. Two days to pretend to be lovers, and parade about the city while Pauly’s team cut the diamonds. This was the rough stage, because I didn’t know who Pauly’s team was exactly. You had to have cojones to cut pilfered diamonds and you had to be good not to mess up the diamonds. Cutting could make or break a diamond. While it was easier to take the roughs unnoticed, getting them cut right was as important to the process as anything. Once that was done, I’d get my traveling outfit and we’d fly home. Then, this would be over.

I plopped down on the bed, stretching myself out, looking up at the ceiling, thinking of how good this would be. Yes, it would mean I’d have to leave my students before the year was out, but it also meant that I’d be able to take care of Lynx. And we’d get him well. We’d fix him, and he’d be happy.

I heard the door to the suite slam shut. A moment later, Ryan waltzed in with a bottle of champagne and two glasses. “It’s time to celebrate,” he shouted.

“Shhhh,” I said. “The walls aren’t soundproofed.”

“It’s time to celebrate!” he said again, but this time a whisper.

I laughed and stood up, walking over to join him. I took a glass from his hand and said, “Yes, let’s.”

* * *

HE SAID HE’D GOTTEN the bottle of champagne from Ketan, and it was quite a good one. A lot of people didn’t realize Indians drank, but we did like our liquor. My father was especially fond of fine wine. Though, this was a fine champagne.

We’d finished the entire bottle, and I knew I’d regret it in the morning, but I was so happy. I was so glad to have finished this and have it work out, for the most part. I grinned at him. “So,” I said to him, as we sat on the sofa next to each other, the lasts gasp of champagne swirling in the flute in my hand. “What are you going to do when you get home?”

He shrugged, his face going from happy carefree to pensive, a crease forming in the center of his forehead. “I don’t know,” he said. “That’s the funny thing, you know. I’ve never gotten out from under something on my own. It feels amazing. It feels like I’ve really done something, and now I don’t know what to do. Because when I go back home, everything will be the same to everyone else. No one will know that I did this, that I accomplished this. And they’ll treat me the same. They’ll treat me like poor, incapable Ryan.”

I shook my head. “You’ll know,” I said, poking him with my pointer finger. Only it was the same hand that was holding the glass and the little champagne that was left sloshed out and onto his lap. I looked at my hand, thinking of my inebriated dexterity and laughed.

He laughed, too. “You’re right,” he said. “I will know. I’ll know that I can do it.”

“It looks like you peed your pants,” I told him.

He looked down at the spot where the champagne had spilled on him. Then he laughed. “I didn’t, though.”

“I know,” I told him, thought I couldn’t help giggling. Champagne made me giggly. Only Ryan wasn’t giggling.

He looked at me seriously and said, “What are you going to do?”

I thought about it for a minute. This wasn’t a golden get-rich-quick scheme to leave me in the lap of luxury. This money had a specific purpose. “Take Lynx to France for his treatment and save him,” I admitted. “You know, I wanted to save Lily, but I couldn’t. She was the best friend I’d ever had, and no matter how clever I’d been at everything or anything, I couldn’t help her in the end. I couldn’t save my father, either, you know?”

I closed my eyes, as I thought, leaned back. “Not that I’d tried, but I always thought that if I’d tried, I could have done something more. Instead, I left him to rot when all he was doing was what I did today, trying to help his family. And my mother,” I said, the words coming out thick and raw. “I couldn’t save her either. She was brilliant. And brave. And strong. She couldn’t save herself and I couldn’t save her, either. There was nothing I could do for her. For a while, I thought, maybe the only person I could actually save was myself, you know?”

His misty blue eyes were focused solely on me and he nodded.

“But now I don’t think that’s true. Or maybe not entirely true. I think maybe you have to save yourself. That you have to be the one that digs deep for yourself when things get rough, but I also think that part of saving yourself is saving others. That you have to try, that you have to try to help the ones you love, even if you don’t entirely succeed, because the helping is what connects you to the world. You know? It connects you to other people.”

His voice was soft when he spoke, and he leaned in close, so our faces were almost touching. “You helped me, Onyx.”

I smiled. “I’m glad. I like you, Ryan. I always have.”

“Me too,” he said. “I mean, I’ve always liked you, not always liked me.”

I grinned. “I know what you meant.”

And then his lips were on mine, in the perfect kiss. All the parts of me that said this was a job and that I shouldn’t do this, they stopped. They weren’t there, because all I could think of was how soft and warm his lips were, how they made me feel safe and happy and like everything was going to go be OK. They made me feel like it wasn’t me fighting against the world, that I had a partner, and that’s all I wanted right now. More than anything, I wanted to feel this

The heat from our kiss traveled through my body, and I wrapped my arms around him, pulling him closer to me on the sofa. He leaned me back, the heat from his body. My fingers slid beneath his shirt, and I could feel his chiseled abs, the soft sheen of hair on his body, and the heat coming from him. My hands traveled up his chest, getting caught on his shirt, and I knew then I wanted it off. I wanted to see his sculpted body again.

I maneuvered my hands so I could pull off his shirt, grabbing at its edges and pulling it over his head. He was a glorious physical specimen, and I just took a moment looking at him. I don’t know why I’d denied myself before. This was going to be so glorious.

As I stared at him, I noticed he was looking me, too, desire in his eyes. He leaned forward and I closed my eyes, expecting him to kiss me again, to do what we’d been dancing around the last couple of days. But then he kissed the top of my head, and stood up.

I opened my eyes, confused. “What’s going on?”

He shook his head. “You’re drunk,” he said.

“So are you,” I said back, my voice whiny and laced with the disappointing realization that this was not going to go how I expected.

He shook his head again. “I’m not drunk,” he said, and then kneeled down next to me. “We shouldn’t do this just because you’re drunk,” he said, his voice so calm.

“I’m not that drunk,” I assured him. “And I want to do this, drunk or not drunk.”

He regarded me a minute, blew out, closed his eyes. “You’re making this very hard for me, Onyx,” he said, running his fingers through his hair and sighing. “I’m trying to be new Ryan, one who’s responsible, and I know that I want you, that I want you a lot, and not for just a night. I want you for more than that, and that means I can wait. If you want me when you’re not drunk and celebrating, then I’ll be here.”

I shook my head. “Ryan, you don’t know how much I want you right now.”

He chuckled. “Oh, I have an idea,” he said. “You may, in fact, be the one who doesn’t realize how much I want you. But I know that I have to stop.” He leaned forward and our lips almost touched, but then pulled back without kissing me. He swallowed. “I won’t stop if I do that. I’m only so strong, Onyx,” he said, standing up and pulling his shirt back on. “I’m going to go for walk. You should go to bed, get some sleep.”

With that, he grabbed his loafers and went out the door.