The glare of bright light. Incessant pounding behind her eyes. And then suddenly, the sensation of tumbling; her body held fast by the sheets that swaddled her as her head rolled through the darkness.

Kate fought the urge to retch as she tried to focus on a single thought: where am I? But the synapses of memory were singed in the heat of the headache that raged behind her eyes. Opening her mouth to call for help released little more than a whimper.

Somewhere in the distance a banging sound, followed by beeping horns and scraping metal. A flashback of her car flying through the air.

The accident.

Glimpses of foliage and a chainsaw. Then the dense fog returned.

‘Matthews? You awake?’

The supe’s voice. Had he come to save her?

A cool hand was grabbing at her arm and shaking her.

‘Matthews? Wake up. I need to talk to you.’

Kate strained her eyelids apart, suddenly aware of the pillow behind her head and the firm mattress pressing against her aching body.

‘Sir?’ she choked, her voice little more than a whisper. She cleared her throat, the taste of blood clinging to the roof of her mouth.

She heard movement, the clatter of blinds being pulled closed. ‘Is that better?’

It was. Opening her eyes wider, Kate’s surroundings came into focus; a private room; her bed against one wall; machinery beeping and whirring behind her; to the left a door was ajar, revealing a small bathroom.

‘Hospital?’ she croaked.

The supe passed her a beaker and straw, and she sucked the warm water in.

‘I should have brought some grapes,’ he muttered dismissively.

She cleared her throat. ‘I’d prefer wine.’

Some of the tautness in his face evaporated as he smiled, but his smile was short-lived. ‘How are you feeling?’

‘Like I’ve been in a car accident.’

‘You’re lucky to be alive.’

‘Renshaw, sir… did we—’

‘He’s in a room down the hall, with a police guard.’

She sighed, some of her tension easing. ‘We got him.’

The chair screeched against the floor as he leaned in. She could smell the tang of coffee on his breath. ‘But at what cost, Matthews? Your car is a write-off and you… what if he’d driven into someone? A family? Would that have been enough?’

‘Enough?’

‘Enough for you to stop this one-woman campaign to put away every criminal who crosses your path? You think I haven’t noticed all the extra hours you’ve been putting in? First in, last out, you’re in danger of burning yourself out. I thought you were smarter than that.’

She bristled as the pain in her head intensified. ‘We caught him. It’s over.’

He stood, aggravated. ‘But for how long? Until the next case? I gave you a team for a reason. You don’t have to do everything on your own.’

‘Sir, I give Patel and Laura plenty to do.’

He raised a cynical eyebrow, but didn’t break pace. ‘You are supposed to lead by example. But your relentless determination to put yourself in the line of fire is going to bring nothing but pain to you, and those around you. You’re out of control and it’s dangerous.’

‘I wouldn’t do anything to endanger the lives of my team, or the public,’ Kate said, meaning it.

He continued, unconvinced. ‘I’m not the only one who’s worried about how hard you’ve been pushing yourself.’

‘I learned my lesson in London.’ She gritted her teeth against the pain, against the memory.

‘I hope you did… Don’t think I haven’t realised that this weekend marks the anniversary of DC Spencer’s murder. There’s nothing you can do about that. It happened, and you need to move on.’

The memory of Amy’s lifeless face assaulted her; that cold stare from the gutter, her bruised and lacerated body abandoned like yesterday’s rubbish. Kate fought to clear her mind as her head dissolved further into the pillow.

Not now. Not now.

The supe’s eyes trailed across the end of the bed where her foot poked out from beneath the sheets, bandaged and elevated slightly. ‘Have they said how long you’ll be out of action for?’

She frowned, registering her injured foot for the first time and not daring to move it. ‘It’s fine. I’ll get some painkillers, maybe some crutches.’

He looked at her sceptically. ‘You have holiday. I suggest you take it now, before you make me do something we might both regret.’

‘But, sir, the case. We need to secure the evidence against—’

‘Underhill will take control in your absence.’

She groaned.

‘I know the two of you don’t see eye to eye, but he is one of the best and it’s time for you to take a step back.’

She fought against the rising emotion in her throat. ‘Don’t do this, sir. Please.’

‘It’s out of my hands. Professional Standards will have questions for you; if you’re lucky, you’ll come out the other side unscathed, but you’ll benefit from being out of the light for a bit. We all will.’

There was a pause as Kate considered pushing back, but it wouldn’t help her cause.

‘They’ve reopened the case into DC Spencer’s murder. I presume you know that?’

She winced. So this was why he really wanted her to take a break. Ben had been urging her to take a holiday too. Why did they all think she couldn’t cope? She’d lived through it once, she could do it again.

‘I’d heard a rumour.’

‘Yes, well, given what is likely to be dragged up, a few weeks away from the office is exactly what you need.’

‘But what if they want me to discuss the case?’

‘They don’t want you anywhere near it.’ He said it so matter-of-factly it must have been an order.

‘That’s ridiculous. I was the SIO; I know that case better than anyone—’

‘They want fresh eyes on it, and that’s that. You’ve been instructed to stay away.’ He glanced back at the door. He’d said his bit. ‘I’ll be in touch when I’ve heard from Professional Standards. Go home, Matthews, and rest.’ He turned and disappeared out the door.