Track 32: Side A

Replay

 

Jace

Waking up to find Linc’s side of the bed empty and cold sends a terrifying jolt through my heart, until I hear plates clattering together in the kitchen. I take a calming breath, willing my heart to slow down, before climbing out of bed and pulling on a pair of pajama pants.

I find Linc standing at the stove, his fine ass on display with nothing but an apron on. Mozart is laying at his feet, and his tail thumps against the floor when he sees me. In the few weeks since we brought him home, Mozart has fit seamlessly into our lives. I’m still not sure how we’re going to work it when Linc goes back on the road, but I’m working hard on trusting that he’ll always come home to me.

“Morning, Freckles,” Linc greets me with a smile. “I’m making breakfast.”

“Um…why?” I ask in sleepy confusion. I need coffee before my brain turns on in the morning. Luckily, Linc knows that because he pushes a full mug across the counter toward me.

“I couldn’t sleep. I woke up a few hours ago and organized the cabinets and fridge, then I thought I’d make breakfast.”

Alarm bells go off in my head. When Linc was diagnosed, Alex went over a list of things for me to watch for to know if Linc is having a manic or depressive episode, and not sleeping was top of the manic list.

“You couldn’t sleep?” I repeat in a forced calm voice.

“Don’t worry, I already called Alex, and we talked for a while this morning about it. I don’t think I’m having an episode; I’m just excited about something. But I’m going to watch for any other signs that might suggest otherwise.”

“What are you excited about?”

“It’s a surprise,” he smirks over his shoulder at me and piles some eggs onto a plate.

“I hate surprises,” I complain.

“You’ll like this surprise,” he assures me. “Can you grab the butter out of the fridge for the toast?”

I do as he asks, shuffling over and pulling the fridge open. He really did organize it. Then I notice some items have little white labels on them. I pick up the butter and see the label says lube. Then I grab the jam and see a not lube label.

“What the hell?” I ask with a laugh.

“I figured it would be good to have things labeled, so we don’t have to stop in the heat of the moment to discuss if something is acceptable lube or not. I had to speculate on a few things, but I think I did a pretty good job.”

“I hope you know how weird you are,” I chuckle.

“I’m the weird one? I’d be happy to use anything slick as lube; you’re the one with restrictions.”

“I’m not even going to dignify that with a response.” I shake my head at him and grab the toast out of the toaster to butter it with a smile.

After breakfast, I get dressed, needing to hurry if I don’t want to be late to my early lecture.

“We’re going on a date tonight. I’m going to text you the name of the place, so you can meet me there after work.”

“Oh? Okay,” I agree as I button my shirt.

I notice a secret little smile on Linc’s lips when I kiss him goodbye, and I can’t wait to see what his surprise is tonight.              

I arrive at the bar Lincoln texted me, and I don’t see him anywhere. With a mixture of trepidation and excitement, I grab a beer and find a table in the far corner and watch the door for Lincoln’s arrival.

I notice a small stage for live music, and I remember for a moment the time I went to watch Downward Spiral’s first live show at some dive bar outside Cincinnati. It was gross, but watching Lincoln play and hearing everyone cheering for him had been amazing. I wasn’t surprised a few months later when he told me they’d been discovered by a man working for a record label while playing at another bar one weekend. I always knew Lincoln had what it took to become the real deal. He draws people in. And for a high school garage band, it was obvious they all had talent and drive.

Lincoln was right when he said it would’ve been the wrong move for me to follow them on tour that year after high school. It would’ve been the wrong choice, but I still wish he’d have left that choice up to me. However, that’s water under the bridge now. I know the future of the band is up in the air, and Lincoln is taking his diagnosis and recovery one day at a time. I don’t know where we’ll be in a year, except that we’ll be there together.

An employee steps onto the stage and adjusts the microphone.

“We have a special surprise for everyone tonight. It is being requested that there be no video recording during the performance. Enjoy.”

I glance around, looking for Lincoln. I’m sure he won’t want to miss whatever local talent has the bar employee this excited.

When my eyes return to the stage, my breath catches. Lincoln is standing there with the biggest smile I’ve ever seen, his guitar in his hands. The entire bar falls silent as they process the fact that a rock god is in their midst.

Our eyes lock, and I can feel my answering smile.

Hi, I mouth at him.

Hi, he mouths back.

“I’m betting you guys weren’t expecting to see me playing in a dive bar in the middle of nowhere, right?” Lincoln asks and everyone in the bar laughs in agreement. “For those of you who don’t know me, I’m just some jackass who makes way too much money to sing songs. But tonight, it’s not about money, and it’s not about publicity. Tonight, I want to play a song I wrote for someone very special to me. Jace, I didn’t deserve a second chance, but you gave me one anyway. I thought I lost you ten years ago, and I lost myself that day, too. This song is called “Replay,” and it’s for you, Freckles. In case you’re keeping count, this is your fifth song, so I’m all paid up,” he says with a playful wink.

I can feel eyes turning toward me as Lincoln talks, but I don’t care. All I can focus on is the beautiful man on the stage as he sings a song about having a second chance with your first and only love.

When the song ends, he pushes the guitar over his shoulder, so it’s strapped to his back, and he jumps off the low stage, making a beeline straight for me.

I stand up and let him drag me into his arms for a demanding kiss full of promises of the future.

“You and me, Freckles? We’re forever.”

“Forever,” I agree.

Lincoln smiles against my lips and then reaches into his pocket. He pulls out a silver band and holds it up for me.

“Forever?” he checks once more, and I realize what he’s asking. A sound escapes my lips somewhere between a laugh and a sob, and all I can do is nod frantically as I offer him my hand to slide the ring into place.

The End