CHAPTER
TWELVE
IT was a long week that sucked. Hard. Cooper was in the kitchen, ready to leave for the weekend and a Saturday race. He desperately wanted to escape the tension in his house, yet at the same time he was dragging his feet, not wanting more time to slide by without any communication with Harley. She was being polite to him, nothing more. All her conversation focused on his sister, and she had bailed on dinner on Monday and Tuesday, claiming a headache both nights.
Sinus weather, she’d said.
It wasn’t her sinuses and they both knew it.
She couldn’t look at him without picturing him in bed with her twin.
“What time will you be home on Sunday?” Harley asked Wednesday night, scooping cookie dough onto a baking sheet. She made cookies. How could he not love her? “I have a bachelorette party to go to.”
A bachelorette party. Hello. He had to admit, the thought of Harley at one of those girls-gone-wild nights was a hell of a turn-on. He suddenly had an image of Harley cutting loose with her girlfriends in a tight tank top and a short skirt. He would really like to see that. There was most likely more to Harley than met the eye and he wished he could see any or all of it. “On a Sunday night? Who is getting hitched?”
“Shawn Hamby married Rhett Ford a couple of weeks back and they’re having a reception on Monday, bachelorette party on Sunday. I know, it’s weird because they’re already married, but the bride was overruled by his family.”
Ah, the marriage-after-a-minute MJ had been talking about. “Sounds fun. Where’s it at?”
“The Silver Buckle. It starts at nine.”
That bar had a mechanical bull. Damn, but what he would give to see her wrapping her thighs around a bull. He cleared his throat. “I’ll be home by then. If not, then Rosa can stay with MJ for a couple hours. It’s all good.”
“I don’t need a babysitter,” MJ protested.
He and MJ had been as polite with each other as he and Harley. He felt like his relationship with his sister had taken a step backward and it was contributing to his misery. “I would feel better if Rosa were here,” he said simply, not wanting to argue with her.
“That sounds good,” Harley said. “Shawn and I have been friends for a few years. I would hate to miss it.”
He had a thought and it was a bad one to have. He could crash the party. It was a free country. He could happen to be at that bar, right? He was bound to know a person or two.
Harley would be pissed, though. But maybe under those circumstances she would loosen up and he could talk to her, press his case. He wasn’t ready to throw in the towel yet. He looked at her and he just ached to hold her. He’d had one brief taste of her lips and it had been the ultimate tease. One potato chip before someone yanked the bag out of his hands. God, he cared about her so much. He wanted to hold her and kiss her and love her and build a life with her.
Maybe Rosa had a candle for that.
“I’m sure you’ll have fun. But watch out for Eve. She’ll draw you into trouble.” Like a fetish club. Damn. He’d forgotten about that. But he suddenly remembered and it was clear Harley did, too.
“I can handle Eve.”
“Well, you certainly handle us.” He meant it as a compliment, and hell, it was the truth, but it didn’t sound quite right.
Harley’s expression was solemn, searching. He missed her warm, bashful smile, occasional sass sneaking in. He wanted to coax that smile out of her again, see it directed at him with a genuine light and sweetness. But mostly now when she even looked at him, she stared at him like he was a Grade A fuck-up.
Which he was. But he was an inadvertent fuck-up. Didn’t that count for something?
“You handle yourself just fine.”
Okay, now that sounded even worse than what he’d said. Cooper wanted to laugh. But the look of horror on Harley’s face had him coughing to hide it.
“I mean, have a safe flight and a good race.”
Cooper picked up his bag. “Alright, well, have fun if I don’t see you before then.”
“Thanks. I hope everything goes well for you down there. This is going to be your season. I can feel it.”
How was he supposed to think rationally when she said nice things like that? Women weren’t nice to him, not really. They were usually angling, trying to please. But that wasn’t the same as being nice.
No one ever called him out either. Harley already had, multiple times. She had offered her honest opinion on how he was failing his sister, and he appreciated that she had MJ’s best interests in mind.
She was the perfect woman for him. He just knew it.
Yeah. He was so going to the Silver Buckle Sunday night.
* * *
IT was her one night to finally have some fun and Cooper was ruining it. Absolutely freaking ruining it.
Harley sat at the sticky table at the Buckle with Shawn and Eve and jammed her straw into her drink over and over, thoroughly agitated. “I seriously cannot believe he’s here. Why is he here?” She had specifically mentioned where she was going to be so he didn’t accidentally decide on a whim to come to the same place. She didn’t want to see him. She had avoided him all week after their awkward encounter in Daytona when she had learned she blew in bed and her subsequent complete lame-ass inability to tell him the truth.
“He told me he was here for the salsa,” Eve said, shrugging.
“The salsa?” What the hell. “He could have ordered the salsa and had it waiting for him at the house if he really wanted this particular salsa. He could have flown the damn salsa to Florida and back. He’s the kind of guy you say could buy a second boat when the first one gets wet, that’s how much money he has.” She’d seen it firsthand. A few bucks were not a concern for Cooper.
He was playing some kind of game. He had to have known Charity was going to be here at this bachelorette party with her. Was he trying to make her jealous by hitting on her sister? That made no sense because he’d already told her the sex had been terrible.
Egotistical as it was, when she’d first seen him, she had thought he was there to pursue her and her vagina had fluttered. Hard-core, girl-bits-on-fire, call-of-the-wild shit. She wanted him. Despite the fact that if he knew she was the woman he’d had sex with, he wouldn’t want her. It was torture. Like complete and utter agony. “I hate feeling this way.”
“What way?” Shawn asked.
“At the mercy of my hormones. It’s about as useful as an ashtray on a motorcycle.” Because she was distracted, and damn it, she was jealous. So if that was his plan, it was sure as shit working. Cooper had waved to her and given her a big old smile, but then he had grabbed a beer and made his way to the dance floor, where he had a steady stream of admirers shimmying around him.
“Maybe you just need to get laid.”
Yeah, well. She had at the wedding and look how that had turned out.
“By who? I’m not hiring a male prostitute.” She sucked hard on her rum runner, feeling particularly bitter. “But I’ll shut up now because this is your party and this is a happy occasion.”
“That was convincing,” Eve said with a grin.
Rhett and Nolan’s sisters had come up to the table and they were all talking. Harley silently stewed. Now Cooper was dancing with her sister. Seriously? Charity was laughing, her head flung back as he murmured something to her. What the hell? Granted, she had never told her sister what had really gone down. Charity did know they’d kissed and as her twin she should know not to flirt with the guy Harley had secretly slept with as her. Which sounded so ludicrous even in her own head that she took another hard sip of her drink.
Without warning, Rhett’s sisters grabbed Harley by the hand and dragged her onto the dance floor. She tried to resist, but she was so distracted, she was no match for middle-aged married women on the loose from their husbands and children. Trying to blend behind their undulating bodies, Harley halfheartedly danced as she used the cover of the wives to watch Cooper.
His hand was on Charity’s back and was heading south down the I-77 of her ass crack.
Wait a minute.
Why would he be doing that?
He had said he wanted to be with her, Harley. Was this retaliation for turning him down?
Whatever it was, there was no mistaking it when he kissed her sister.
If she had been holding her drink she would have dropped it. Or thrown it in his face. And you know what? Charity’s, too. Her twin was letting a man kiss her knowing full well Harley had already kissed him.
Just stick a fork in her. She was so done.
* * *
COOPER had a buzz and a hard-on. He was damn confused and thinking that showing up at the Buckle had been a bad idea. Like one of the worst he’d ever had. Not to mention that he had impulsively invited his former stepfather’s former stepson, Jeff Sterling. He wasn’t sure what that made them relation-wise. Former half stepbrothers? Did such a thing exist? Though maybe, because the marriages had all been at different times, the step label didn’t even apply. But be that as it may, Cooper usually liked Jeff’s company. Plus he thought it looked less sketchy to show up at the bar with a wingman.
Except that Jeff had spent the first twenty minutes asking about his nanny, and staring over at Harley, where she was sitting with her friends.
He did not want his former half stepbrother hitting on Harley. Because damn it, he had a feeling that Jeff was precisely the kind of guy Harley would go for. Steady, intelligent, thoughtful. Jeff said he’d met her at the wedding. Which made Cooper wonder if “met” was a cover for “made out” or more. The thought of Jeff’s mouth on Harley’s at any point in the past, present, or future made him see red. And green.
“I think I’ll go see if Harley wants a drink,” Jeff said, standing up from his stool.
What a dick.
Feeling surly, Cooper just nodded and ordered another beer for himself. Didn’t Jeff know that he was treading on Cooper’s territory here? Where was the damn guy code these days?
Which was completely irrational, he knew, because he had never once mentioned to Jeff that he had even the slightest interest in Harley. Their relationship was private. He hadn’t ever felt the need to discuss or share it with anyone past Ryder, and that had been out of pure desperation. He’d needed someone to tell him to go for it, which he had, and look where that had gotten him.
“I’m hitting the dance floor.” Maybe grinding with a random stranger would improve his mood. Which was perhaps the most pathetic thought he’d ever had in his entire life.
When he got out on the sticky floor and tried to find his groove, he was startled to see that Charity was out there, dancing in a way that left little to the imagination. Wearing a tiny, short denim skirt, pink cowboy boots, and a shirt with fringe dangling off her chest. He hadn’t even realized she was there, which if he hadn’t been totally preoccupied with his own personal misery and unrealistic quest to get Harley to talk to him, he would have realized made total sense. Of course Charity would be there. She was Shawn’s friend, too.
But now he really regretted his impulsive decision to crash the party. Obviously Charity had not told Harley about their night together, so she couldn’t be happy with him for spilling it. He wasn’t sure how to act or what to say or who may or may not slap him at some point during the course of the night. It was hard to process even for a sober man, and he was pretty damn sure he was no longer sober.
Before he could exit stage left, Charity offered him a smile. She didn’t look like she wanted to rip his balls off. “Hey, Cooper!”
“Hey,” he said to her, giving her a smile, relieved that at least one twin didn’t look at him like he was pond scum. “Y’all having fun?”
“A blast!” She continued to gyrate her hips. “How about you? Funny bumping into you here.”
“Yeah. Total coincidence.” That he had orchestrated carefully and thought about repeatedly for the last three days. “I bet you’re glad to be Roger-free for a night.”
“Oh, God, you have no idea.” She made a face. “Having him here would be like setting a cat loose in a catnip factory.”
“He’s nineteen and making bank. He’s going to get a little wild before he reins himself in.” Or he would wind up like Cooper. Thirty-five and single with a string of failed pseudo-relationships behind him.
Yeah. Not where he wanted his thoughts to go.
“I’m not cut out to be the reins.” Charity gave him a grin and shook her fringe. “It’s not really my style to hold back.”
Was she flirting with him? Reminding him of their night together? When he looked at her, he saw Harley. Why couldn’t she be her? It made him melancholy and confused. God, he was drunk. “I can respect that.”
The song changed to a slower tempo and he felt compelled to put an arm around her. Because it was the polite thing to do. To dance with her. Not weird and inappropriate and fucked up in the least. Plus if he tilted his head and squinted, it was almost like she was Harley.
Charity laughed and because he wanted nothing more than for Harley to find him funny, he felt overwhelmed by that realization. He was in so much trouble. Harley was off-limits. She’d made it clear how she felt about him. Hell, she was talking to Jeff at that very moment, probably smiling and laughing for that asshole. Harley thought Cooper was a douchebag. Harley was too nice for him. He didn’t deserve her.
Charity was his type of woman. Charity didn’t think he was a shitty brother and a moron. Charity laughed and smiled at him like Harley would laugh for Jeff. Charity had already tumbled into bed with him. Maybe he should have fallen in love with her instead of Harley. Maybe he still could and it would be like he really was with Harley.
So with that logic soundly backing his drunken motives, Cooper bent his head and kissed Charity.
It felt . . . flat. Like something was missing. It wasn’t an awkward kiss. But it just didn’t feel like much of anything.
And he had the overwhelming feeling that he had never kissed this woman before in the whole of his life.
So what the hell did that mean?
* * *
CHARITY was caught off guard by Cooper Brickman laying one on her. One second they’d been dancing two feet apart, then two inches apart, then suddenly he was dropping a kiss on her. She was so shocked it took a few seconds to respond, as in slap the shit out of him, but by then he was pulling back, taking his beer breath with him.
Glancing around, she wondered if anyone had noticed. She was all for a little fun and spontaneity, but it wasn’t standard procedure for her to make out with men she didn’t know on the dance floor. Especially a man who had made out with her sister. God, what a jackass. Fortunately, no one in their immediate vicinity seemed to be paying them any sort of attention. But then she saw a familiar face across the room, watching them with a fair amount of disdain.
Jeff Sterling.
Seriously? How it was possible that he was there to witness a kiss she hadn’t initiated or wanted? She dropped her arms from Cooper’s neck and tried to laugh, but it sounded brittle. “I wonder what Jeff Sterling is doing here. I don’t usually run in the same social circles as he does.” She was not even going to acknowledge that Cooper had just kissed her.
“Oh, he came with me.” Cooper put his hand on the small of her back and started to lead her off the dance floor, but she hustled forward so his hand was no longer touching her.
“It looks like he’s with your sister,” Cooper added.
Jeff was. He had crossed from the bar to sit down next to Harley, clearly setting a drink in front of her. The only time Jeff had talked to Harley was when he had really been talking to her, Charity. It made her instantly jealous of her twin, a feeling she detested. “That’s weird,” she told Cooper. Awful. Shitty. Chock-full of suck.
“Why?” he asked.
“Because I just wouldn’t think they would gravitate towards each other.” But even as she said it, she knew that her conclusion was a dumb one.
“Actually, I bet they have a lot in common, including temperament.” Cooper sounded thoughtful and unhappy as he was staring at her sister and Jeff. “I want a shot of whiskey,” he said, sounding annoyed. “Care to join me?”
“I can’t do a shot because I have a wedding reception to go to tomorrow, but I will get another beer.” That probably even wasn’t a good idea, but she was doing it anyway. She was stuck with Cooper while Harley had Jeff chatting her up and plying her with alcohol? So not fair.
This crush on Jeff had brought her nothing but annoyance and low self-esteem.
She was so not having fun.
Worst bachelorette party ever.
* * *
INITIALLY as Harley sat at the table and watched Charity and Cooper on the dance floor, she was grateful for Jeff Sterling talking with her and serving as an occasional distraction. But then it occurred to her, as the nonalcoholic drink she had requested and her buzz both started to disappear, that Jeff was being abnormally attentive. She didn’t know him at all other than calling him out of desperation when Mary Jane went missing, and at first she’d thought he was just being friendly since she was Cooper’s nanny and was sitting alone at a bar.
Even when he asked, “So what are your days off from work?” it didn’t click.
“Monday and Tuesday.”
It wasn’t until his next question that she realized that Jeff was actually showing some kind of actual interest in her.
“Could I take you to dinner some time?”
Harley stopped staring at Cooper on the dance floor and turned to stare at Jeff. Seriously? No men paid attention to her in oh, two years, and suddenly she had both Cooper and Jeff wanting to date her? What the hell. Jeff was giving her an encouraging smile. She suddenly realized his arm was on the back of her chair. So she was a total idiot who couldn’t pick up on a man’s signals. And while Jeff was exactly the kind of man she should be turning cartwheels to go out with, she felt a little deflated by the idea. A lot deflated. Flattered, yes, but not particularly interested. But at the same time, she would have to be a total idiot to turn down a date with a successful and kind businessman to moon over the man who was never going to want to have sex with her ever again once he learned the truth. Which at this point should be never.
“Sure,” she heard herself saying. But even as she said it, she suddenly realized that Charity liked Jeff. Or at least thought he was attractive. She couldn’t go out with him. But she’d just said yes.
Of course, on the other hand, hadn’t Charity just kissed Cooper knowing full well how Harley felt about him?
Screw Charity. If Jeff wanted to take her out she had every right to say yes since Charity had already violated the girl code. Sister code. Twin code. Every code there possibly could be.
“Excellent. Do you like Asian food? There’s a new fusion place that opened up downtown that I would like to try.”
That sounded like a real thing. Like cute clothes and a pricey menu. “Sounds wonderful.” Or awful. But she was fueled by righteous indignation and jealousy, always a magical combination.
“Is tomorrow too soon?” He gave her a smile. “Am I coming off as overeager?”
Frankly, she couldn’t imagine why he would be eager at all. She’d been about as interesting as watching sawdust settle for the last twenty minutes. “Tomorrow I have a wedding reception to go to, and I anticipate Tuesday will be recovery time. So how does next week sound?” Because now she was in, and she was having to go out on this date. With a nice guy. She mentally kicked herself for even thinking it was a hardship.
“That would be great. How about eight? And where should I pick you up?”
Harley wished she didn’t have to drive everyone home in a few hours, because she really regretted having cut herself off from the alcohol. This called for a drink. A stiff one. “Well, you know I live at Cooper’s.” Far, far away from his bedroom. “I don’t think it’s really okay for you to pick me up, do you?”
“Sure. You know Coop and I are related in a manner of speaking, so I’m sure he’s fine with it.”
Oh, somehow she doubted Cooper was going to be fine with it. If she weren’t currently so pissed off at him for kissing her sister after he had told her how he felt about her, she would feel bad to be having another man pick her up at Cooper’s. But she shouldn’t feel bad. He was the one groping Charity right in front of her in the rudest of all rude moves. That was seriously rude. It was downright awful rude. It was like saying she didn’t matter at all, that she was completely and quickly replaceable. And had she mentioned it was rude?
Anger started to spread, like an ugly and itchy rash, throughout her body. You know what? Cooper and Charity could have each other and their bad sex.
And who cared if the bad sex had actually been her? Cooper thought it was Charity, so probably their sex would suck, too. At least that’s what she was telling herself.
“I’m glad Mary Jane has someone around now to guide her. She’s a special girl and I know Bud would be happy with how she’s turning out, and the fact that someone like you is there for her.”
Right. Jeff. He was talking to her. Complimenting her. It made her feel shitty for all sorts of reasons. She didn’t deserve his praise. “I did lose her in Daytona.”
But Jeff just smiled. “Not your fault. Don’t beat yourself up over it. She has her mom’s ability to disappear without warning.”
Harley gave a wan smile, not really feeling any better about it. “It shaved a decade off my life I think.”
“The next time you bring her to a race, let me know. You and Mary Jane can sit in my box with me.”
Oy. That sounded awkward. Intimate. “Excellent.”
If only it had ended there, the night might have turned out completely differently.
Instead, Jeff excused himself after getting her number and Harley went over to watch Eve and Shawn duke it out on the mechanical bull.
And Charity told her that Cooper had asked her out.
“He asked you out?” Harley freaked. She couldn’t help it. Of course she knew that something was going down between Charity and Cooper since she had seen them liplocked, his hand on Charity’s ass, but hearing it out loud, like it was more than just a dance floor grope, had her thoughts catapulting into a future where her sister and Cooper became a couple, married, and had babies with stupid hybrid names like Chooper and Cority.
What. The. Hell.
So she was that forgettable? Literally after four days of pursuing her he just gave up and defaulted back to her sister? What a prick. She officially totally and completely hated Cooper Brickman. She was going to start a club. The Cooper Is a Cock Club.
“Yeah. I so didn’t see that coming.” Charity shrugged her shoulders. “And considering he made out with you, I think that’s just downright shitty. It’s a good thing neither one of us is actually interested in him, because he pretty much has bought a ticket to DoucheCon in my opinion.”
“Did it ever occur to you that I am interested in Cooper?” she asked Charity.
Her twin looked astonished. “You are? Well, shit.”
It should have made her feel better that Charity looked so surprised, but she was not in a mood to be mollified. So she just said, “Well, shit is right.”
Charity started to speak, but Harley very childishly walked away, afraid of what she might say if she stayed. She knew it wasn’t her sister’s fault that Cooper was fickle and clearly going for the lowest sexual denominator. He’d rather have bad sex than no sex at all. It did not say good things about him, and she was feeling hurt and vulnerable and stupid for being duped by his character. Or clear lack thereof.
All of it was just too much to handle in one week, and when they left the Buckle later after she had spent an hour stewing and staying far away from her sister and Cooper, she was still furious. So furious that she felt like punching Rhett when he spoke to her from the backseat as she drove.
“So Harley, you’re quiet up there. Did you have fun?”
“It was fine.” Or shitty, however you wanted to look at it.
Charity snorted.
“Wrong question, hon,” Shawn told Rhett.
Great. Even Shawn had realized she was in a mood. She felt like a jerk for being a brat on Shawn’s big night.
“I’m sorry, Harley. Didn’t mean to poke a sore spot,” Rhett said.
Then before she could apologize to the car as a whole, and Shawn in particular, Charity exploded at her from the passenger seat. “I didn’t know you were crushing on him. If you would actually share something with me once in a while, I wouldn’t have kissed him. You know, it’s really very hurtful that you won’t let me in, Harley. I tell you everything.”
“Wait, so this is my fault?” Harley asked in shock, taking a turn a little hard and running them over the curb.
“Maybe I should drive,” Rhett suggested. “Were you drinking, Harley?”
“No. I cut myself off three hours ago because that’s what I do,” she said. “I am the driver and the wallflower while Charity gets drunk and dances half naked with the guy she totally knew I was into!” Okay, that wasn’t fair, and she knew it. Charity hadn’t known anything. She had intentionally withheld information from her sister. But then again, hadn’t she just admitted she’d kissed him?
“Uh!” Charity gasped. “Don’t you dare throw the slut flag at me. I was not hitting on him and I didn’t know you liked him. For your information, I was actually shocked that he kissed me and embarrassed because it just so happens the guy I like was there. Flirting with you. Which I’d like to point out, you knew.”
“Paybacks are a bitch,” Harley said, which was totally unlike her and very irrational, but seeing her sister with Cooper? That shit hurt.
Shawn leaned forward before Charity could respond and inserted her head between theirs. “Harley, if Charity didn’t know, then I don’t see how you can be upset with her. And Charity, if you want Harley to share, maybe you should let her speak from time to time. Y’all know you love each other and would never do anything to hurt each other intentionally. Chicks before dicks, right?”
“Absolutely,” Charity said as they pulled into Eve’s apartment complex to drop her off. “I did not kiss him, Harley. He just caught me off guard.”
“So you really didn’t kiss him back?” She really did want to believe Charity.
“Of course not! I mean, I didn’t know you were actually interested, but even so, I know you made out with him, so why would I make out with him? Jesus, give me some credit. You’re my sister.”
Harley felt instantly like a jerk. Why was she lashing out at Charity? It was ridiculous. It wasn’t her fault. It was Cooper’s. Okay, and maybe her own. The deception was all hers. “I’m sorry. I know you didn’t know. I don’t know what is wrong with me.”
“It’s okay. It’s been a weird night.”
“I love you,” Harley said, giving Charity a hug as they sat in park, Eve clambering out of the backseat.
“I love you, too.” Charity wiped at her cheeks, where tears had started to trickle.
The sight of that made Harley start up, too, so they were both crying and miserable. “So what did Cooper say to you?”
Charity gestured to Shawn and Rhett making out in the backseat. “I’ll tell you in a minute.”
“Okay.” Though she was pretty certain it wasn’t good. The truth was she was stunned that Cooper hadn’t actually made some reference to his and Charity’s night together. That was a scary thought she’d been too consumed with jealousy to have earlier. What a total disaster that would have been if both Cooper and Charity had figured out on the dance floor at the Buckle that Harley was a lying sack. That would have been bad. Like really bad.
She needed to come clean with her sister. There was nothing for it.
The minute Shawn and Rhett tumbled out of the car to go screw each other’s brains out, Harley put the car in park and shot Charity a glance. “Okay, I have something to tell you. Don’t be pissed at me.”
Charity gave her a long look. “Given that opener I can’t promise anything.”
“So here’s the thing. I did sleep with Cooper at the wedding.” She bit her fingernail nervously and waited for Charity to ream her.
“You did what? You had sex with Cooper Brickman as me? Are you crazy?” Charity flopped back in her seat. “Oh, my God,” she moaned. “That’s why he was so weird when I ran into him at the office one day.”
Uh-oh. “He was weird? In what way?”
“He was all sort of creeper, undressing-me-with-his-eyes, we-share-a-secret dude. I had no idea why he was acting like that. Now I do.” Charity smacked her on the leg. “How could you let me wander around not knowing something like that? Do you know how disastrous it would have been if he’d actually said something? Or tried to grope me?”
“I’m sorry! I didn’t think it through. I was just . . . I don’t know. Embarrassed. I knew it was wrong not to tell him the truth and I knew you would call me out on it, as you should have. Are.” Harley put her hands on her cheeks to try to cool them down. The car felt like an oven despite it being February. She’d never fainted before, but this felt like a precursor to passing out.
“Does Jeff know? I will kill you if Jeff knows.”
That startled her out of her impending fever and subsequent faint that seemed actually possible. “How would Jeff know? No one knows. I left Cooper’s room before morning and no one saw me.”
“You have to tell Cooper the truth,” Charity said sternly. “I cannot look at that man knowing that he thinks he’s seen me naked. It’s horrifying.”
“There’s one slight problem.”
“There is no problem bigger than the one you’re going to have if you don’t fess up, Harley Harlot. You, of all people? I can’t believe this.”
That annoyed her enough that she made a face at her twin. “What difference does it make at this point?” But then she answered her own question because she hadn’t even told Charity the whole truth. “But wait, there’s more.”
“But wait, there’s more? Seriously? It’s like a bad comedy sketch.” Charity shifted her purse on her lap. “I suspect I’m not buzzed enough for this.”
“Cooper said he wants to date me. Like for real, have a relationship.”
“Really? Then why the fuck was he trying to tonsil-tango with me on the dance floor?” Charity looked absolutely indignant.
“I’m not sure, exactly. But he told me he has feelings last week. So I started to tell him the truth, but then he told me that he slept with you.”
“Which was you.”
Yeah, that. “Correct. But then when I was about to admit it was me, he said the sex with you/me didn’t mean anything and that it was absolutely terrible. Horrible. All kinds of awful.” Even now, saying the words out loud made her wince.
Charity’s eyebrows shot up. “Say what? Oh no, he didn’t.”
“He did.” Harley groaned.
“I am not lousy in bed!”
She rolled her eyes at her sister. “It wasn’t you, remember?”
“Oh. Right. But that was still rude.”
Whatever. She couldn’t be too concerned about her sister’s ego at the moment, given hers had been trampled on. “So then how could I tell him the truth? Oh, and by the way, I’m actually the one who is miserable in bed? Awkward. Beyond awkward. All kinds of awful.”
“You’re not miserable in bed. That’s ridiculous.”
“How do you know? You’ve never slept with me.”
Charity rolled her eyes right back. “You would know if you were bad in bed. Men are not kind or subtle. Did you think it was good sex?”
“Yes! It was great sex. I had multiple orgasms. When does that ever happen?”
“Apparently not often enough. Did he come?”
“Yes.” Unless he had faked it. Then she realized there was literally no way for a man to fake it. “He did.”
“Then how bad for him could it have been?” Charity waved her hand. “The truth is very simple. He was obviously trying to protect your feelings. He didn’t want you to think that you would have to compare yourself to me.”
That stymied her for a minute. “No. That can’t be it.” Could it?
“Either that or he was just trying to be truthful, yet keep your anger to a minimum. Men don’t like to be screamed at or cried to.”
“You have a point.”
“You do realize that you’ve been basically torturing Cooper. The poor guy has been falling for you while thinking he nailed me. That is just wrong, sister.”
“I didn’t know he was falling for me! I thought he liked sexy and sassy. I didn’t think he thought of me as anything other than helpful.”
“Yeah, helpful with his libido.” Charity shook her head. “Oh, honey, you’ve never had a particularly sensitive guy-dar. You never know when someone is into you. So clearly we made some erroneous assumptions here, didn’t we?”
Harley chewed her lip. “So the guy I have been crushing on from afar and slept with thinking he would never be interested in me is now interested in me, only he just kissed you for no apparent reason.”
“I think he was jealous of you talking to Jeff.”
“Who asked me out because clearly he thinks I’m the person he talked to at the wedding.”
“Shit,” was Charity’s opinion. “I also think he was feeling rejected by you.”
“Huh.” As they both pondered this irony, Harley’s phone buzzed in her lap.
“Oh, my God. It’s Cooper.”
“What does he want?”
“He says they’re still at the bar and we should come back. He is clearly drunk.” Harley felt annoyed all over again. “He must want to make further moves on you.”
“Then why is he texting you, not me?”
“Does he have your number?”
“No. But he could get it from someone else. He clearly wants to see you, Harley.” They were still sitting in the car in the apartment complex parking lot.
“You think so?” Harley felt deflated. She had no idea what to do, but she did know she didn’t want to go home to Cooper’s house and lie alone in her bed all night, wide awake, pondering all the ways she had blown it.
“We could go back,” Charity said.
“Why? So we can drive each other insane with jealousy? I don’t want to see Cooper grabbing your ass anymore. I’ve had enough tonight.”
“I don’t want to see Jeff fawning over you either, trust me.” Charity shook her head. “But you have to tell Cooper the truth. For everyone’s sake. Might as well get it over with.”
Ack. “You’re right. I know you’re right.” The thought just made her want to hurl. He was going to hate her.
“We should switch clothes, go as each other, and then unmask. They’ll both be so shocked they won’t be angry.”
“Are you insane? That is a terrible idea!” It would be like an episode of Catfish. Oh, my God. She’d be out of a job and Cooper would never speak to her ever again.
“About as smart as you sleeping with Cooper as me.”
Fair enough. “You don’t want to do that. Not if you are truly interested in Jeff. But you need to fess up, too. You did chat him up as me.”
“Why? Jeff isn’t interested in me. He likes you.”
“Jeff is attracted to my appearance and who he thinks I am. But once he spends time with you he will totally fall for you. He already did.”
It wasn’t a line to talk Charity into coming clean as well. Harley definitely believed it was true. Charity had just as much substance as she did. Men just generally chose to ignore the possibility because Charity was gorgeous and larger than life. Jeff Sterling was a reasonable guy. He would see the merits of her twin and fall for her. After all, he was talking to her, Harley, after having spent time talking to Charity as Harley. It all made sense, really. In the most bizarre way imaginable.
“Jeff is going to be pissed we lied.”
“This was your idea. Don’t talk me out of it.”
“Fine.” Charity grabbed Harley’s phone out of her lap and started typing, speaking out loud as she did. “On our way. Winky face.”
When Harley took her phone back and saw that Cooper had responded with a simple “Good,” her anxiety increased. She had a feeling that before the night ended someone was going to be madder than a wet hen.
She wasn’t sure which would be worse—if it was Cooper or it was her.