It was a relief to get outside. The memories were hanging over my head like a poisonous cloud but the pristine white slopes blew them away—for the moment. Everything sparkled. If I concentrated, I could count every pine needle, every cone, every snowflake, my perception was so clear. The mountains didn’t daunt me today but exhilarated.

I’d borrowed a snowsuit from Karla, which made me look like a dumpling, but Zed seemed to think it was cute.

‘Nursery slopes?’ I asked, my breath puffing like a dragon.

‘No, too many people.’ Shading his eyes, he studied the mountain, giving me the chance to appreciate how long and dangerous he looked in his close-fitting navy ski suit, a shark on the slopes. He flashed a grin when he caught me admiring him and waggled his eyebrows teasingly. ‘Like what you see?’

I elbowed him. ‘Shut up! You really need to work on that humility thing.’

He laughed. ‘I will—if you’ll promise to teach me.’

‘I think you’re a lost cause.’

That provided him with even more amusement. When he’d finally stopped laughing, he hugged me to his side. ‘So, Sky, are you ready? Because we’re going up. There’s a peaceful place. I was going to take you there that day we got shot at in the woods, but I think it’s even better in winter. We’ll catch the lift up and walk down to it.’

The top of the mountain was much quieter than at the weekend. José wasn’t manning his stall so I couldn’t stop for a doughnut and a chat as I usually did. Zed led me away from the busy runs and into the woods.

‘Is this a good idea? You know what happened last time we went into the forest.’

Arm looped over my shoulders, he rubbed my upper arm in reassurance. ‘Dad and Mom are holding a barrier around the place. Trace, Vick, and Will are on lookout. We should be fine.’

‘A mind barrier?’

‘Yeah, it sends people away, makes them think they left the headlights on or got to meet someone in town. Which reminds me: how did you get through ours last night?’

I shrugged. ‘I felt it, but I was too desperate to care.’

‘You shouldn’t have been able to do that. It was why Trace and Vick were so suspicious of you just turning up out of the blue.’

‘Maybe this barrier isn’t as strong as you’d like to think.’

‘Maybe you’re stronger than we realize. We’ll have to find out.’

‘Not just now, please.’ I didn’t want anything more to do with savants—their powers were too freaky.

‘No, not now. This is playtime.’

We broke out into the open and the ground dropped away in an awesome sweep, smoothly curved like a J. The peaks across the valley towered on the horizon like an audience of giants come to watch the show.

‘Wow.’

‘Great, isn’t it? Not many people come here because it heads nowhere, but I like it. You can do some extreme boarding here without pesky skiers like my brother getting in the road.’

‘I’m not ready for extreme.’

‘I know. We can do slow and gentle too.’ He flipped the board down on to the snow. ‘Been surfing?’

I laughed. ‘You don’t know much about London, do you? We’re not exactly beach babes in Richmond.’

He grinned. ‘So what did you do all day?’

‘We have a deer park. You can go riding. There’s the Thames if you like rowing.’

‘Spill it.’

‘I … er … shopped. I’ve got an Olympic gold in that. And I had my music, of course.’

‘Time to broaden your horizons. Take a run then slide.’

‘What?’

‘Trust me, just do it.’

Feeling more than a bit foolish, I did as he asked.

‘OK, so you lead with your right foot.’

‘You can tell that how?’

‘It’s the foot you chose to slide with. Now, I’ll get you in the right stance.’ He adjusted the board and showed me where to put my feet. He put his arm around my waist and rocked me to and fro. ‘It’s about balance.’

‘This is just an excuse for you to get your hands on me.’

‘I know. Great, isn’t it?’

To my surprise, I proved much better at boarding than skiing. I fell over lots, of course, but more like the average learner than the complete idiot I was on skis.

‘Let me see you do your thing, Hot Stuff,’ I teased Zed after I felt I’d sat enough times on my butt to call it a day.

‘OK, Short Stuff. Make yourself comfortable over there and don’t move. I’m gonna show you how it’s done. I’ve just got to go up the hill some.’

I sat in the shelter of a little cliff, watching the slope for any sign of Zed but he seemed to be taking a very long while to get to the beginning of his run.

‘Woo-ee!’

A board shot overhead and Zed landed six metres in front of me, weaving his way down the hill.

‘Show off!’ I had to laugh. I should’ve guessed he’d do that.

He took a while to trudge back up to me, board on his shoulder, but he was grinning every step of the way.

‘What d’ya think?’ he called.

‘Hmm.’ I examined my nails. ‘Passable.’

‘Passable! That was perfect.’

‘You see, this other guy came by and did a somersault. I gave him a ten.’

He dumped the board and tackled me down on to the snow. ‘I want a ten too.’

‘Uh-uh. Not without a triple axel.’

‘That’s skating, you dork.’

‘My guy, he did one of those on the way back. Got maximum points.’

Zed growled into my neck. ‘I’m your guy. Admit it: there was no one else here.’

I giggled. ‘Still can’t give you a ten for that jump.’

‘How about I try and bribe you?’ He kissed his way up my neck to my lips, taking time to hit all the right spots. ‘So? How did I do?’

Hoping his future sense was on hold for the moment, I quietly took a handful of snow. ‘Hmm, let me think. It seems to me … you still need practice!’ Before he could react, I stuffed the snow down his neck, producing a squawk I’d not heard from him before.

‘Right, this is war.’ He rolled me over but I scrambled free, gasping with laughter. I ran but he caught me in a few steps and lifted me off my feet. ‘It’s into the snowdrift for you.’ Finding a deep patch, he dumped me down so I was half buried.

‘All the more ammunition!’ I made a quick snowball and chucked it at him.

It veered in the air and came back to hit my face.

‘You cheater!’

Zed bent over with laughter at my outrage.

‘That does it! Two can play at that game.’ Remembering my egg lasso, I imagined pulling the branch over his head down then let go. It sprang up, showering him with snow. Pleased with the effect, I brushed my hands nonchalantly together. ‘Take that!’

Zed shook the ice off his hat. ‘We should never have told you about being a savant. You’re dangerous.’

I leapt up, clapping my hands. ‘I’m dangerous—dangerous! Woo-hoo, I’m dangerous!’

‘But not yet skilled!’ The snow shifted from under me and I was on my back in the snowdrift with Zed kneeling over me, a threatening snowball in hand. ‘So what was that about my snowboarding?’

I smiled. ‘Definitely a ten. No, an eleven.’

He chucked the ball aside. ‘Good. I’m glad you’ve seen reason.’

I spent some time on my own later in the day, walking in the woods at the back of the house, sorting through the memories Uriel had unlocked. After my parents’ murderous argument—I couldn’t bear to dwell on that—my early childhood had been a chaotic nightmare of constant moves, haphazard care, and no love. It hadn’t become completely terrible until my aunt had hooked up with the drug dealing boyfriend.

What had happened to the rest of my family? I wondered. Had my mother and father no parents or grandparents, or other brothers or sisters for me to go to? It was a puzzle, and I suspected the answers would not be happy ones. At six, I’d only had a vague grasp of my circumstances, knowing I counted on two unreliable adults to look after me. It had been a horrible existence; not knowing how to make them love me, I had retreated into myself and taken small steps against Phil the bully who had made a project of hurting me.

I rather admired my child-self for that, even though I could have avoided some pain by keeping silent.

I strained to remember more. My name. It seemed a simple thing, one I should remember.

‘Sky, are you all right?’ Zed thought I’d brooded for long enough and had come in search of me bearing a takeaway cup.

‘I’m OK. Just thinking.’

He handed me the container. ‘You’ve done enough of that. Here, I made you hot chocolate. Not as good as the café’s, I know, but it should warm you up.’

‘Thanks. I need a chocolate hit right now.’

He took my elbow, steering me back towards the house. ‘Did you know that chocolate had special chemicals in it to make you feel happy?’

‘I don’t need an excuse for chocolate.’ I sipped, glancing at him sideways. The front of his hair where it was not covered by his hat carried a few snowflakes. His eyes were cheerful today—the pale green-blue of the river shallows in the sunshine. ‘And you, have you been sneaking some of the same chemicals?’

‘Hmm?’

‘’Cause you look happy.’

He laughed. ‘No, not chocolate, just you. That’s what being a soulfinder is all about—you’re my happiness shot.’

No, that wasn’t right: my parents proved that having a soulfinder spelled destruction. I was pretending to Zed that everything was OK but I just couldn’t do it—couldn’t take the risk. That crushing realization made me feel as if I’d just skied off a cliff and was still in freefall. How was I going to tell Zed—and his family—that after seeing what had happened to my mum and dad, I couldn’t be what they expected? When I landed with that news, everything was going to turn really ugly. Zed was going to hate me—and I already hated myself.

I was so scared.

With that hanging over me, the Benedicts chose that evening to begin preparing their house for Christmas. I felt like the Judas at the feast. Saul and Trace disappeared up into the attic and emerged with boxes upon boxes of decorations.

‘You take this seriously, don’t you?’ I marvelled, fingering a beautiful glass bauble with a golden angel suspended inside. That was me—trapped in a bubble of panic, unable to break free.

‘Of course, Sky,’ said Karla. ‘We collect as we travel. My family in the Savant Net, they send me special decorations to add to it each year. It would be an insult to the giver if we did not use them.’

Zed, standing behind his mother, rolled his eyes. ‘Mom doesn’t think one decoration enough when ten will do. You’ll think you’re standing in the Christmas department of Macy’s by the time we finish.’

No inflatable Santas for the Benedicts. Every artefact was exquisitely handmade and unique. I found a carved nativity set from South America, a string of icicle lights from Canada, and Venetian glass baubles. Part of me craved to belong to this wider family of people with the same kind of gifts, but I didn’t deserve to, not when I rejected their ways. I was going to have to say something and soon—it wasn’t fair to let them all treat me like one of them when I’d already made my decision to cut myself off from that future. But as each moment ticked by, I couldn’t find the courage to speak.

The ‘boys’, as Karla termed her menfolk, hauled back a fir tree cut from the family plot. It was twice my height and filled the family room to the ceiling. After the customary swearing over faulty bulbs and missing extension cords, Saul and Victor wrapped it in lights. The younger members of the family got to put on the decorations, Zed lifting me up on his back so I could put my choices on the higher branches. Karla recounted a tale for each one, either something about the person who gave it to her or about the place she had bought it. I got an impression of a huge extended family from here to Argentina with far flung branches in Asia and Europe. It made my own family of three seem very small.

‘Now we have the carols!’ declared Karla, returning with a tray of mulled wine, more hot chocolate for me, and sweet cinnamon biscuits.

Trace pretended to groan and complain. From the amused lights that shone around him, I guessed he was merely fulfilling his expected role as family musical failure. I settled back on a beanbag, keeping out of the way with my guilty conscience for company, and watched Saul tune up his fiddle, Zed get out his guitar, and Uriel assemble his flute. They played a selection of traditional carols beautifully, some of the tunes so haunting I felt I was transported back in time to when these were first sung. It was only then that I realized Uriel was glowing gently with a bronze light. He was not only playing tunes from the past, I could see that he was partly there.

‘We need a vocalist,’ Uriel announced. ‘Trace?’

Everyone laughed.

‘Sure, if you want to spoil the moment,’ he said, half getting up before Will wrestled him back down.

‘Sky?’ suggested Yves.

I shook my head. ‘I don’t sing.’

‘You’re really musical—I’ve played with you, remember,’ he coaxed.

A flutter of panic made me want to hide. ‘I don’t sing.’

Uriel closed his eyes for a moment. ‘You did.’

‘Not any more.’

‘Why not, Sky?’ asked Zed softly. ‘That’s behind you now. You’ve looked at the memories and can put them away. Today’s a new start.’

Just not the start he was expecting. Oh God, help me.

Karla passed around the plate of biscuits, trying to break the tension. ‘Leave the poor girl alone, you three. No one has to sing if they don’t want to.’

But I did. Underneath the alarm, I knew that as a musician I would love to sing, use my voice as another instrument.

‘Come on, I’ll sing with you.’ Zed held out his hand.

‘We’ll all sing,’ suggested Uriel. ‘ "Joy to the World"?’

‘I’ll play my sax,’ I prevaricated. My mum had dropped it by earlier, knowing I needed music as a comfort when I was distressed.

The Benedicts then proved they not only sang but they harmonized as well as any choir I’d heard. Even Trace ventured a few bass notes without disgracing himself.

At the end, Zed gave me a hug. ‘You’ve a great touch on the sax. You know it’s the closest instrument to a human voice.’

I nodded. My tenor sax had been a way of singing without it actually being me. It might be close but I sensed it wasn’t quite enough for Zed. He wanted everything and knew I was holding back.

Zed gave up his bedroom to me that night to bunk with Xav. Despite my anxious state of mind, I was so mentally exhausted, I managed to sleep, the first really unbroken rest I’d had since my kidnapping. I woke the next morning to find my mind had been working in the night to sort itself out like a computer going through a defragging process. Having stumbled past my early memories, I remembered everything about Las Vegas. Kelly had taken me apart bit by bit. He’d made me think such terrible things about Zed and Xav, sprayed his graffiti all over my mind—I hated him for that. But now I was back in charge; I could tell truth from falsehood and that was worth celebrating at least. Desperate to share the discovery, I rushed to find Zed.

‘Hey!’ I burst into Xav’s room which was next door. Zed was still zipped up in a cocoon of a sleeping bag on the floor, Xav sprawled on the bed, mouth open, snoring. ‘Zed!’

‘W-what?’ He scrambled out and grabbed me close, assuming we had to be under attack. ‘What’s happened?’

‘I know who took me! I remember it all.’

Xav tumbled out of bed. ‘Sky? Wha’s’matter?’

I suddenly became conscious that I was standing there in nothing more than a long T-shirt and knickers. I should have stopped to put on more clothes.

‘Um, can you get Trace and Victor, Zed?’ I asked, edging back. ‘I’ve got something to tell them.’

Zed had had time to surface from sleep. He grinned and patted my butt. ‘Go put on my dressing gown. I’ll get them out of bed and meet you in the kitchen. Mom and Dad will want to hear this too.’

I told them what I remembered over a cup of tea—my English drinking habits surfacing when I felt most uncomfortable. The memories were frightening: the hotel, Daniel Kelly forcing images into my head, the son circling me like a blubbery great white shark.

Victor recorded what I said, nodding as if I was confirming things he had suspected.

‘Another family of savants outside the Net,’ mused Saul when I’d finished. ‘Ones with no soulfinders to add balance. And they had O’Halloran on the payroll. Sounds to me that there’s more out there than we thought.’

‘I know how to manipulate people’s minds,’ said Victor, tucking the recorder in his pocket, ‘but I would never think to do it to such an extent.’

‘That’s because Kelly’s evil and you’re not,’ I suggested. ‘I’m not joking when I said it was like brain mugging. He stole from me, trying to make me hate you.’ I reached for Zed’s hand under the table. ‘The pictures are still there in my head even if I know they’re false.’

‘Have you heard of a gift like the son’s before?’ Zed asked Saul, squeezing my fingers in reassurance. ‘I don’t like the way he went after Sky, making everything worse.’

Saul rubbed his chin in thought. ‘The Ute talk of people who thrive on the emotion of others. They are the parasites in the savant world.’

‘And the daughter, what can she do?’ asked Trace.

‘Maybe she has a gift with shields—at least she talked about breaking through mine but it wasn’t strong enough to stand up to Daniel Kelly. He’s very powerful. I resisted for as long as I could.’

‘Probably longer than she expected,’ commented Victor. ‘And it didn’t take properly, did it? You questioned all the time.’

‘Are you going to arrest him?’

‘Ah.’ He sipped his coffee. ‘The thing is, Sky, this isn’t evidence that I can use to apprehend Daniel Kelly. He’s a powerfulman; his money buys a lot of silence. No judge would accept your account, especially after the confused version you’ve already given to the Las Vegas police accusing others.’

‘Zed and Xav.’

‘Yeah. They dropped their investigation when I proved that they couldn’t have had anything to do with your abduction, but it discredits you as a witness.’

‘I see. So there was no point me telling you all this?’

‘Of course there’s a point. We have the truth now and it ties up the things we didn’t understand or couldn’t know. It is invaluable that we are aware that there are other savants out there working on the dark side.’ He curled his lip ironically at the Hollywood echo. ‘Yeah, we have a dark side too in the savant world. We could’ve walked into all manner of traps if we’d remained in ignorance. And it raises the possibility that the mole in the FBI does not even know they’re doing it. Daniel Kelly could have got to one of my colleagues and forced them to betray us. I’ll have to review who’s had contact with him.’

I felt better to know that I had been of use. Revived by this thought, I checked the clock: seven thirty.

‘You know something? I want to go to school today.’ I’d give anything to feel normal again—to be with friends who couldn’t change my thoughts, read my mind, or make things explode. It would also delay having to have the big conversation with Zed that I knew was coming.

‘What?’ Zed rubbed his rough chin. ‘You have the perfect excuse to miss class yet you want to go?’

‘I don’t like skiving. It makes me feel as if I’m sick, as if I’m letting Daniel Kelly win.’

‘Well, if you put it like that, then we have to go. I’d better get ready. Man, I didn’t bother to revise for my physics test thinking I’d be with you here today.’

Saul frowned. ‘If you’re using Sky as an excuse to duck work, Zed …’

Zed was up and away. ‘Meet you down here in twenty minutes, Sky.’

‘I’ll just let my parents know what I’m planning.’

Sally and Simon were really happy that I felt well enough to face school.

‘You were absolutely right, darling,’ bubbled Sally over the phone, ‘you needed a change of scene and the Benedicts were the best place for you to go.’

‘But I’ll come back home tonight.’ Being here was too painful as I’d made up my mind to reject the savant world.

‘Wonderful. We’re planning a treat for you—a little trip.’

‘Not Vegas?’ I groaned, remembering Simon’s new idea.

‘If you’re feeling better, then we should put the bad memories to bed—see what the city has to offer.’

‘I don’t want to move there.’

‘Nor do I, darling. But you know Simon, he has to follow this to the end and then he’ll decide our way in any case.’

I had no desire to go back to a city holding the Kellys. ‘This woman who has got in touch: who is she again?’

‘Mrs Toscana—a friend of Mr Rodenheim apparently.’

‘What hotel does she manage?’

‘I forget. Circus Circus was it? Something like that.’

It rang no bells but the coincidence was too suspicious; I decided I’d mention the approach to Victor just to be sure. ‘OK, Sally. See you later.’