Only seconds before, Caine had been determined to maintain eye contact. Now he was avoiding it. He’d gently pulled out of me, grabbed tissues off his desk, cleaned up, and put his pants back on.

All the while I sat there naked on the desk, watching him put the wall back up between us. My stomach felt sick. “Caine?”

Instead of answering me he ran a hand through his hair as he glanced around the room for his shirt. He found it and shrugged it on.

“Something’s wrong,” I said. Clearly there was something wrong. One minute we’d been going at it like lust-starved teenagers and now he wouldn’t even look at me.

“Caine.”

Finally he glanced up from buttoning his shirt. He was guarded as he avoided looking anywhere but at my face. I crossed my leg over the other and leaned back on my palms, thrusting my breasts out in defiance. That instantly distracted him. He clenched his jaw as his gaze roamed over me.

“Well?”

Eyes blazing he glared at me. “This was a mistake.”

Even though I knew it was coming, it still hurt like hell. “A mistake?”

“Yes. We crossed the line.”

“I see. We’re back to that again.” I stared at him in disappointment but refused to budge. We were not leaving this office until I’d removed the stick from his ass, something that apparently only sex could do.

Well, if I had to, I had to.

My eyes greedily took in his handsome face.

It wasn’t like it was a hardship or anything.

I smirked at the heat in his eyes. At least I knew he wanted me physically. That made it easier to keep pretending that I was completely comfortable sitting cross-legged and naked on his desk. “We should talk.”

“You,” he snapped, reaching over to grab my dress off the sofa, “should get dressed.” He held it out to me.

I took it from him, but I had no intention of actually getting dressed while my nakedness did so much to throw him off balance. We stared defiantly at each other.

“Alexa, get dressed.”

No more Lexie for me, huh? Another sharp pain sliced across my chest. I hid it from him. “We’re back to Alexa, I see.”

Apparently Caine was done with being impatient and was now moving on to annoyed. “Look, we were attracted to each other, we got it out of our systems, and now we need to go back to being boss and employee. And from this point on we’re maintaining a strictly professional—” He cut off to scowl as I uncrossed my legs only to cross them again in the opposite direction. He looked away. “Strictly professional relationship,” he finished, his voice thick. “Now get dressed.”

Realizing I wasn’t going to get anywhere with him until I conceded this one thing, I slipped gracefully off the table. “I need to clean up.”

Without looking at me he pointed to the bathroom off his office. “You know where it is.”

Shrugging on as much confidence as I could muster, I strode into the bathroom, my dress trailing from my hand, and I was satisfied to feel the burn of his gaze on my back as I went.

The truth was my heart was racing as I cleaned up and slipped my dress back on. I’d left my panties out in the office, but I was too shaken up to go back out there for them. As I stared into the mirror, seeing my flushed cheeks and bright eyes and post-sex hair, I was flooded with the sensation of being with Caine all over again. I could still smell him. Taste him. Feel him.

I’d just had the best sex of my life with a man with whom I shared off-the-charts chemistry. What was between us wasn’t average or everyday. It was extraordinary.

And he was acting like it meant nothing.

The sickness in my stomach intensified and when I looked back in the mirror I could see the flush draining from my cheeks.

I’d never felt like this about any man.

This was lust. This was what all those books and films were always going on about. This wasn’t the sexual attraction I’d felt for other men. This was full-blown desire.

Yet—I closed my eyes, remembering the way he’d held my gaze as he moved inside me—it could be more between us. If we tried, who knew where extraordinary could take us?

More scared than I had ever been in my life, I threw my shoulders back with determination and walked out into the office to face Caine.

He was shrugging on his jacket and I saw his relief that I’d put my dress back on.

My belly flipped at the sight of him all rumpled and sexy. Why, oh, why, out of all the men in the world did Caine Carraway have to be the one to make me feel this way?

I stopped a few feet before him and he narrowed his gaze, as if he sensed what was coming.

“You’re afraid to let me in.”

He shot me a warning look. “Alexa.”

I forged ahead. “But I know something all those other women who have tried and failed with you don’t. I know you’re a good man. Real in a way they’ve never had the chance to see. I know that because I saw it when you were with Effie. I saw who you really are. I see who you are because … we’re not so different, you and I. We both deserve happiness.”

For a moment Caine just stared at me and a little bubble of hope floated around inside me. When he took a step backward, extremely guarded, that little bubble just went pop. “Happiness? This coming from the daughter of the guy who destroyed my family?”

All the air went out of the room.

It was like he’d punched me in the chest.

And he wasn’t finished. “I don’t know what this is you’re trying to do, but you and I are not the same.” He took another step back from me. “And I am not for you. I’m not your white knight. I’m just the guy who wanted to fuck you.”

I flinched under the sting of his words. Words that humiliated me. I’d idiotically allowed myself to be vulnerable with a man who’d already proven he had no qualms hurting my feelings.

My God, I was such a stupid, stupid fool. Worse. I was … some kind of masochist!

I was my mother.

I tried to pull my feelings back inside me so he couldn’t see how he’d cut me up into slices. However, I knew it was too late when he said my name in a gentle, remorseful tone. He wore guilt and regret on his face.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I didn’t mean … I shouldn’t have said that.” He ran his hands through his hair, looking appalled that he had, and frustrated by my effect on him. “I’m just not the guy you’re looking for. I’m not ever going to be that man. Trust me.”

How could I have allowed myself to forget who I was to him? That was what I’d done here.

Oh God. He must have felt terrible for having sex with me. A Holland. Warily I looked over at him. Did he want to wash me off? Forget I happened? I sucked in a breath at the painful thought.

He sighed. “Let’s just put this behind us and go back to being the pain-in-the-ass boss and the smart-ass PA.”

I stared at him, bewildered by the suggestion. He really thought I could be around him after this?

No. I was done.

What my family did to his had damaged him. The kinship I felt between us … I didn’t know if it was real or just something I had imagined to life out of the seeds of my loneliness, but I did know that Caine was determined never to feel the connection.

“I shouldn’t have come to you for help,” I said. “You’re right. This was all a mistake. You can consider this my two weeks’ notice. After it’s up, you’ll never have to see me again.”

I knew Caine well enough to know that the emotion that flashed in his eyes that he tried so hard to bank was anger. I didn’t know how to interpret that reaction, though, and frankly I was raw, mortified, and completely done with the whole mess we’d made. I didn’t want to overanalyze a flash of emotion from him.

“I’ll call a cab.”

“No.” He shook his head. “I’ll have the driver drop you off at your place.”

I did not want to spend another twenty minutes stuck in a car with him. “I said I’ll call a cab.”

Caine was visibly pissed as he took a menacing step toward me. “For the next two weeks you’re still my employee. If I say I’ll take you home, I’m taking you the fuck home and it’s final.”

It was the most silent and uncomfortable car ride in the history of car rides.

After showering the smell of him off my body, I climbed into bed, hugged my pillow like a five-year-old, and then cried all over it. The sun was just starting to filter through my curtains when I eventually nodded off to sleep.

It was with tear-crusted eyes I woke only a few hours later to the sounds of Gloria Gaynor’s “I Will Survive.”

I’d changed my ringtone before I’d gotten into bed.

“M’ullo,” I said into my duvet after grabbing the phone off my bedside table.

“Lexie?”

At the sound of Grandpa’s voice I groaned and pushed myself up into a sitting position. “Morning.”

“You sound like hell.”

“No comment.”

“Look, I’m calling to apologize for last night. I wish you’d told me you were going to be attending Dick and Cerise’s anniversary. If I’d known I would have come up with an excuse not to go so I didn’t have to put you in that position. Christ,” he said regretfully, “the look on your face, sweetheart, well, it made me … I felt like shit all night.”

I felt a pang of remorse for my resentful thoughts when he’d ignored me. I understood the situation. I couldn’t start pretending I didn’t whenever it suited me. “It’s okay, Grandpa. I understand. I even introduced myself as Alexa Hall all night so people wouldn’t ask questions.”

“I know.” There was a smile in his voice. “You made quite an impression. You looked beautiful. I just wish this family wasn’t full of malicious drama queens. If they were more understanding, this could all be out in the open. Anyway, I hope you didn’t disappear because of me.”

I flushed at the real reason. “Uh, no. Caine had a work thing.”

My grandfather was silent for a few seconds. “You slept with him, didn’t you?”

“How—” I lifted my jaw back up off my duvet. “How the heck did you know that?”

“Because he ignored his date all night as he prowled around the room like a jungle cat hunting my granddaughter. I thought at one point he might actually kill Henry Lexington.”

A thrill coursed through me at the thought of Caine’s jealousy. “He was watching me all night?”

“What do you think everyone was talking about?”

“Oh my God,” I muttered as a realization hit me. I remembered that weird little triumphant smirk on Henry’s face when Caine interrupted our dance. “Henry knew. He asked me to the party to push Caine’s buttons.”

“That sounds like a Lexington.” Grandpa’s voice lowered. “So, was this part of the plan?”

“I’m not sure I’m comfortable discussing this with my grandfather.”

“I’m not sure I’m comfortable with my granddaughter dating a known womanizer.”

The ache from last night returned. “Don’t worry about that. I don’t even qualify as a date. It was a onetime thing.”

“I’m going to kill him,” Grandpa immediately growled over the phone.

There was every chance he might actually consider something stupid like that. I put on my sternest voice. “You’ll do no such thing. It was my mistake. I stupidly forgot who I was to him and I thought there was something there that wasn’t … I gave him my two weeks’ notice.”

Grandpa heaved a sigh. “Lexie, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I did this to myself.”

“Well, you make sure he gives you a good recommendation.”

I smiled sadly. “I will.” I glanced at the clock. It was early yet, which meant many hours to kill. “For now I’m going to buy myself something to make me feel better before I start job-hunting.”

“Okay. You call me if you need me, sweetheart.”

For some reason that made me tear up.

I thought of how stupid I’d felt after putting myself out there to Caine and being rejected. But I also felt kind of free. For the last few weeks I’d had our attraction hanging over me and subconsciously I knew I’d been building it up in my head into something more than it was. Now, though, I had my answers and I could move on.

Being honest had been scary and it hurt, but at least I wasn’t a coward.

It was time to keep living life that way. I sucked in my breath, exhaled, and then said something I’d never said to a man since I was fourteen years old and I finally realized the truth about my dad. “I love you, Grandpa.”

Shocked silence echoed down the line.

And then came his warm, hoarse reply, “I love you too, Lexie.”