Chapter Twenty-One

HOLLYWOOD Magic for Beaumont, Stone

With the limited theatrical release of Dog Gone, Drew Beaumont and Steven Stone’s joint motion picture, just a week away, reviews from the film’s advanced screenings are coming in—and they’re glowing.

Though perhaps not so much as the leads themselves.

Gerald Dunwoody, our in-house critic, called the movie “gut-bustingly funny. Beaumont and Stone have an undeniable chemistry, and it crackles in every scene they share.” In the blogosphere, Crooked Cinema reviewer Donna Gill said she “laughed until my abs cried for mercy.”

Even the bro brigade had to give it two reluctant thumbs-up. “I didn’t expect to like it,” admitted Tom Woolworth, president of the Stanford chapter of Delta Nu, whom I caught up with outside the sneak preview Thursday night. “My girlfriend made me go. But it’s f—ing funny. And the dog was cute.”

The dog in question is Rita Stone, pampered pooch of Marla Stone—who also has a cameo in her son’s debut, by the way. And as you can see from the attached picture, Rita is exactly as advertised.

If the name Dog Gone doesn’t ring a bell for you, you can be forgiven. It’s a small production with a small budget and what was expected to be small-potatoes distribution—in theory Dog Gone is notable only for its surprisingly star-studded cast (longtime Beaumont BFF Leigh Miller also has a role). Either way, you’re hearing about it now.

The movie stars Drew Beaumont as Scotty, a hapless but well-meaning guy whose most fervent, flighty desire is to return his best friend’s dog to her rightful owner. Between his puppy-dog eyes and his way with words, it’s no wonder Morgan—played by Beaumont’s real-life partner, Steven Stone, who also wrote the screenplay—goes along with his scheme, to hilarious results.

But don’t be taken in by the innocence of the premise. And don’t expect a typical cheap laughs slapstick comedy either. Stone’s writing is razor-sharp, and his delivery would impress even a seasoned acting coach, though this is a freshman effort for him all around. Beaumont’s irreverence and delivery are pitch-perfect, and the dialogue gives his comic chops a chance to shine, but it’s through Morgan’s eyes that we grow to love him as a character.

It doesn’t take a genius to figure out why Steven Stone is so effective in this role. Since they first began dating last summer, Beaumont and Stone have rarely been apart. Stone has escorted Beaumont at every major appearance he’s made since July, including starlet Leigh Miller’s destination wedding in Fiji. And even to the untrained eye, they look deliriously happy in every photo.

When they’re not attending black-tie or Hawaiian-shirt events, it appears they’ve been dabbling in real estate. Beaumont’s Santa Monica condo hit the market last month. Rumor has it he and Stone have been looking for a home in Beverly Hills.

Looks like these two are living their own Hollywood happy ending.

“THERE he is!”

“There they are!”

“Drew! Over here!”

“Steven! Can we get a smile and a quote for Out Magazine?”

Steve shot Drew a long-suffering look, but he didn’t threaten to go back to the limo like he did the first time they walked a red carpet together. Progress.

“You know, you don’t have to come,” Drew had said after two premiere experiences failed to enchant Steve. “I can go alone.”

Not according to the expression on Steve’s face. “Ugh, no. I’m not giving the vultures grounds to start a rumor we’re ‘on the rocks already’ or whatever garbage they just put Leigh through. No, thank you. I can suck it up. It’s not like it’s every week.”

So they went, with the understanding that they would leave as soon as it was polite.

“What, no smile?” Drew teased now, bringing Steve’s hand to his lips for a kiss.

“Not for them,” Steve countered, his eyes soft as his lips edged upward.

Drew couldn’t help but smile back.

Unfortunately he couldn’t make eyes at Steve all night. After all, this was their movie premiere.

Drew signed a few autographs while the reporters assembled their questions. Marla swooped in and co-opted Steve for a more structured interview farther from the crowd; he’d be more comfortable with that.

“Drew, how good does it feel to be standing here today ready to screen a movie you were so instrumental in every part of?”

He took a second to make sure he was addressing the right interviewer before answering. “Honestly it’s amazing. Back in May I knew we’d get here, but filming was so long ago now you sort of forget. Postproduction takes time. The sense of accomplishment…. It’s different. I could get used to it, though.” He glanced over his shoulder at Steve and Marla. “But the best part has been watching Steve. He’s got so much talent in so many different areas, and the way he pulls storylines together, the way he crafts jokes, even his presence on-screen—it’s been such a joy to be a part of that.” He cleared his throat a little. “I’m so proud of him.”

“Has this experience taught you anything about the movie business that you didn’t already know?”

Drew laughed. People couldn’t get enough of the idea of him as a producer. “God, where to begin. Yes, absolutely. I have a whole new appreciation for the depth and breadth of knowledge needed by every member of the crew. Not to mention respect for office staff, who have to do things like book the right animal talent and deal with the schedule falling to pieces if something doesn’t pan out.” Those people spent 40 percent of their time in crisis mode. Drew couldn’t live like that, but they thrived on it.

A third reporter chimed in. “What’s next for the two of you?”

Unable to help himself, Drew glanced over his shoulder again. Steve still seemed comfortable, though his hands in his pants pockets were ruining the lines of his suit.

Not that Drew could complain. He’d had one hand in his pocket since they got out of the car. He didn’t want anyone to see the outline of the jewelry box he was saving for their very private after-party, and guess what it contained. Steve deserved to be the first to know.

After Marla, of course, who caught Drew looking at Steve and raised her eyebrows.

Right. Drew had a job to do.

He cleared his throat. “Well, Steve’s working on another screenplay. I don’t think he’s ready to share it with the world yet, though. And I have this premiere, and then I’m off to Vancouver to film part of a Netflix series next month, and then I’m taking a sabbatical.” A whole month and a half with no work. He thought he might go crazy, but his mom would put him to work with last-minute details for Sarah’s wedding, and Steve would probably at least pretend to bounce plot ideas off of him out of pity if Drew seemed bored enough.

“What about personally? I heard a rumor you’re looking for a house?”

They’d put an offer in that morning, actually: a ranch-style home a few minutes’ drive from Marla’s, with a privacy hedge and a pool and a couple hundred thousand dollars in pending renovations. A writer deserved a proper office, after all.

But Drew had learned in the past few months. He could gush about Steve personally, but the specifics of their relationship were off-limits. “Am I? Lucky me.” He smiled to soften it, and then Marla called his name, and he made his excuses to cross the carpet.

“You didn’t tell anyone you took your mother as your date, did you?”

Steve looked away from the interviewer, expression exasperated layered with affection and, beneath that, relief. “I should be so lucky.”

Drew grinned and slid his free arm around Steve’s waist. “Are we ready to wrap this up? We’re needed inside for….” He waved his hand. “I don’t know, but I’m a very demanding and organized producer, so I’m sure it’s something.”

The interviewer laughed like she was meant to. “Just one more question. Steven, how does it feel to be the one to take Hollywood’s hottest bachelor off the market?”

The question was innocent enough, but it betrayed a fundamental misunderstanding on her part. Before Steve could answer, Drew broke in, turning to face Steve instead of the camera. “Oh no,” he said, shaking his head. “You’ve got it all wrong. I’m not his leading man.”

Steve was laughing at him, Drew could tell from his eyes, but they held a sweetness and a depth of emotion that made Drew feel like swooning.

“He’s mine.”

You are cordially invited….

THOMAS & REBECCA BEAUMONT

together with

MARLA ROMANIC STONE

request the honor of your presence at the marriage of their sons

ANDREW FRANCIS BEAUMONT

and

STEVEN MORTIMER STONE

on the fifteenth day of July of this year

at four thirty in the afternoon

The Aquarium of the Pacific

Cocktails and reception to follow

Best wishes only