Chapter 3

 

 

 

 

He nibbled her bottom lip before his tongue swept masterfully into her mouth. Her body wanted everything he had to offer. Her brain fought back, knowing the consequences of her actions.

She pulled herself away. “I'm sorry I can't,” she gasped.

He groaned. “I didn't mean to push you. I’ve waited a long time for you and my cat is eager. I know we have to wait until we’re sure it's safe but I want you.”

She heard the honesty in his voice. She knew, for him, this was normal. One found their mate and started a life together. It killed her that she was going to destroy him. That this choice had been made without her consent. She would never be able to choose him. She needed to tell him that it was over. He should move on. Though her mind knew the truth, her body would not cooperate. “I know. I wish I could be what you want me to be.”

Hunter tilted her head back. “You’re everything I want you to be. Smart. Strong. Brave. What more could I want?”

His misunderstanding undid her. “That isn't me. You don't know ME,” she said in distress.

He kissed her temple. “You were held captive for four years. Forced to do unspeakable things. You survived. The moment you got out you tried to find a way to sabotage the Kallans' work.”

She was surprised. “Why would you say that? Maybe my research is just to rid myself of the compound I was injected with.”

Hunter raised an eyebrow. “And you need something from one of Kallans’ facilities in order to do that?”

Her heart stuttered. She hadn't let him read her research. “What are you talking about?”

“When you gathered your papers back at your makeshift lab, you had plans for a research facility on your desk. It didn't have a name or a location but I assume it's a Kallan Corp. facility.”

“It's subsidized by Kallan Corp. but operates under a different name.”

“And?”

“I considered breaking in to get something I needed,” she admitted.

His hand wrapped loosely around her neck. She didn't miss the possessive gesture nor the angry undertone in his voice. “You’ll not do anything to put yourself in danger. If my family feels there’s something at the Kallans' facility we need, we will infiltrate it, not you.”

She would never be sure if it was her long incarceration or her looming transformation but her emotions burst loose. She poked a finger in his chest. “I'm sick of people telling me what to do. I may not have much time left on this earth but I’m going to do what I want, when I want, and there is nothing you or anyone else can say or do about it,” she snapped.

Hunter wrapped a hand around the finger pressed firmly into his chest. He brought it to his lips. “Is that so?” he whispered before sucking it into his mouth.

She expected her outburst to anger him. She watched his eyes turn gold. “You can't...” She couldn't remember what she was about to say. Her mind blanked out when her body began to heat.

Hunter released her finger. “I have a mate that does not want to acknowledge me. I can and will do anything to ensure her safety... as well as her pleasure.” He kissed her wrist, caressing the soft skin with his lips as he traveled up her arm.

He crested her shoulder, continuing his erotic torture, to the base of her neck. She knew she should stop him. Every synapse in her brain screamed. Her body, however, was melting into a pliable creature at his touch, inadvertently pressing closer to his warmth as he made his way to her ear.

“Let me have you. I know you're not ready to give me your heart but trust me with your body,” his seductive voice whispered in her ear, causing her legs to clamp together to ease the tension.

Should she take this one moment for herself? She scrunched her eyes. “You won't bite me?” she pleaded.

He nibbled her ear. “I won't mark you without your consent.”

It wasn't exactly the answer she was looking for but her body was in flames and her brain was shorting out. “Don't hurt me.”

Hunter looked at her with glowing yellow eyes. “I won't.”

The buttons from her blouse hit the wall when he ripped open her blouse.

   Could she be selfish and take this one moment of happiness while keeping her walls in place? Her body wanted to with every fiber. Her mind feared she wouldn't be able to walk away. The irresistible man touching her was nibbling away at her defenses.

She felt a tingling wave ripple under her skin. She pulled back, looking at Hunter in alarm.

“What is it baby?” he asked concerned.

“I felt something,” she stuttered.

He smiled slyly. “I'm hoping you'll feel a lot of things.”

She blushed. “I don't mean that. I don't know what it was.” Her mind raced over unforeseen variables. He hadn't bit her. The hormone had to get into her bloodstream to take effect.

Hunter put his lips to her neck. “Hmm. I hope it's overwhelming arousal. I'm waiting very patiently for you to ravage your mate.”

She closed her eyes. He couldn't say things like that. He believed they had a future. She should stop this madness, now. “Hunter...”

He nibbled her earlobe, forcing every coherent thought from her brain. She had never been aroused. As a scientist, she knew all the mechanics. Nothing had prepared her for Hunter. She arched back as his hand went to her breast, massaging her through the thin material of her bra. When he slipped under the lace, pinching her nipple, she bit her lip to avoid calling out.

His fingers were magic, applying just enough pressure to inflame the lust mounting in her body. He slipped his other hand down her pants, cupping her heat, while his teeth nibbled and scraped her sensitive skin. She could feel the fire building, threatening to burn out of control. His finger slipped under the thin fabric of her underwear, causing her to moan.

His fingers circled the slick flesh of her pussy. She pushed against his hand in order to relieve the mounting pressure. Her breathing became uneven, her movements more forceful. She couldn't think through the glorious sensations. “Don't stop,” she said when he adjusted his stance.

“I'll never stop.” Two fingers entered her, causing her to cry out.

He moved them slowly in and out. She clutched his arms, holding back the tsunami threatening her.

His thumb rubbed over her engorged bud, pushing her over the edge. She shivered as she came, causing a ripple of fur to travel along her arm before retreating. She looked at her limb as if it was part of someone else, moving it left and right, trying to figure out if she had imagined it. “It can't be happening yet.” The horror in her voice was apparent.

Hunter pushed her arm back to her side. “Don't worry. I won't mark you or do anything to speed the transformation.”

Her jaw dropped. “Speed it up? It shouldn't be happening. You didn't bite me. The hormone needs to be introduced into the bloodstream.”

Hunter rubbed the back of his neck. “That's true but we found out from Lucy's experience with Cyril that once the hormone is in a mate’s body our proximity starts the transformation. We thought you knew that.”

“We thought you needed to bite your mate. How does the hormone get from your body into your mates if it isn't blood? It can't be sex.”

Hunter smiled. “No, it isn't sex. Talen hadn't even kissed Lucy when hers started.”

“How then?”

Hunter raised his eyebrows.

She pursed her lips, thinking of the sensory glands used primarily by felines. “It’s scent isn't it?”

“Yes.”

“That explains why every male given the compound goes mental on me,” she said sarcastically.

Hunter stiffened. “Every male?”

Racheal cleared her throat, cursing her mistake. “Jordan wanted to see if the compound would react the same way with another subject. He injected a guard with the hormone. When the guard attacked me, he shot him.”

“Fuck. I'm sorry,” he said rubbing her arms.

“I'm infectious,” she laughed without humor.

“No, you're not, and I would like to prove it to you.”

“How?”

“I want you to allow one of my brothers to approach you.”

She shoved away from him. “No!”

“Racheal. I don't believe Devon was immune to you because he’s mated. I believe he’s immune because he’s my brother. We protect our own even within a larger lair.”

“They'll attack me,” she insisted.

“I'll have Luca come, over but will have Liam watching with a rifle. If Luca comes near you, Liam will shoot him.”

She huffed. “You’re never going to allow one of your brothers to shoot another under any circumstances.”

“These are regular bullets. They sting, sure, but we expel them in seconds.”

“There's no reason for me to meet your brothers,” she stammered.

Hunter’s eyes glittered. “You're my mate. There's every reason.”

Racheal sucked in a long breath. “I'm not your mate.” Racheal heard the lie in her voice, knowing he did as well.

Hunter squinted. “You are.”

She knew she was pissing him off. “I can't be your mate.”

He stood immobile. A sexy angry statue. “Why?”

She didn't want to reject him. Didn't want him to think this was her choice. “Because I'm going to die.”

   Hunter’s cat roared in his head. “You aren't going to die. I won't allow it.” He kissed her neck, acknowledging his cat needed the reassurance as much as he did.

He nuzzled her. “I won't mark you. I'll wait until we know it's safe.”

She slipped her arms around him, resting her cheek on his chest. “It doesn't matter. Lana died from the drug Jordan gave her. I will as well.”

Hunter’s grip tightened around her. “Who was Lana?”

“She’s a woman who was brought into the facility. She’d tested positive for the mating hormone and was given the same compound as me.”

“What happened?”

“Like me, she was dormant at first. They gave her a synthesized version of the mating hormone. Jordan said she was exposed to her mate and started the transformation. She died.”

“Are you sure? Did you see it?”

“No, but Jordan had no reason to lie. He never expected me to be released. He said the transformation was disturbing. Nothing disturbs Jordan so it must have been pretty bad.”

Hunter felt uneasy. Not sure he wanted the answer to the question he had to ask. “Do you know what species she was exposed to? Was she a cougar?”

“It's possible. We were working on cougar and wolf DNA at the time.”

“Shit. Do you know who her mate was.”

“I have no idea.”

“Did he explain what happened to her?”

Racheal nodded. “He said everything cracked at once. She remained human with every bone in her body broken until her heart gave out.”

“Jesus. My father was worried something like this would happen. The transformation is hard enough. The female body needs a rest period between each stage.”

Racheal looked at him closely. “There's more.”

Hunter's heart sputtered. “What could be worse than killing your mate if you claimed her?”

“Jordan didn't just give me the serum. He also poisoned me on a genetic level.”

Hunter’s cat stilled. “What does that mean?”

“I need an injection once a month or I die.”

“You have been gone almost a month now.”

“Yes. I synthesized a neutralizing compound to extend my life but it's only temporary as I don't know what he used on me.”

Hunter’s cat growled low. “We’ll figure it out, Racheal. I've waited too long and gone through too much to lose you now.”

Her fingers bunched in his shirt. “I'm sorry.”

He kissed her head. “Don't be sorry. Tell me you will fight with every breath. That you'll use that incredible brain of yours to figure this out.”

She was thinking. He could practically hear her thought process. “What did you go through?”

It was the one question he wished she hadn't asked. He couldn't lie to her and if he told the truth, he may lose her. He looked up at the ceiling. “It happened at Woodstock.”

   Hunter contemplated how to tell her the truth while glossing over the more explicit details of his betrayal.

Racheal looked perplexed.

“What?” he asked.

“Woodstock, as in 1969?” she asked.

“You do know we have longer lifespans.”

“Yes, but reading it and experiencing it are two different things.”

Perhaps he could focus on the era and less on the illicit events of that time. “It was a unique time in history.”

Her eyes narrowed. “I'm interested in you in that time.”

Nope. Not getting off that easy. “I lost my way for a while,” he said honestly.

“Tell me,” she said.

He had the feeling he was being judged and one misstep would lose him his mate forever. He cursed his idiocy. “I met Lilith a few weeks before Woodstock.”

“How did you meet her?”

Shit. “A party,” he said.

“Considering the era. Would that be a party that ended in something close to an orgy?”

Hunter rubbed his neck. “Yes.”

“I see. Go on,” she said, her tone frosty.

“She was with another man and asked me to join them, I did, we hit it off and were together from that moment on. She was fun, affectionate and had an unusual sense of humor.” He could see he wasn't winning any points with his mate by being truthful about Lilith.

“What did she do to hurt you?”

“That's the problem. She was honest. She didn't promise me a future or plan one. She lived life for the moment with no thought of tomorrow. I found her refreshing. But my cat wanted no part of her.”

“Why didn't your cat like her?”

“It isn't that he hated her. He had no interest in her. She wasn't his mate.”

Racheal frowned. “I don't understand.”

“No different than humans. We need time to mature. While we can have sex with a woman prior to mating, our animal looks at this as learning. No different than learning to hunt. This socialization is meant to be short term. The knowledge learned to be applied to pleasing one’s mate.”

She pulled back from him. “Your cat allows you to have sex so you can learn to be a better lover?”

“Yes. It also allows us to fight so we can learn to protect our mate.”

“Who did you fight?” she asked.

“My brothers mostly. There have been humans that have needed to be set straight but shifters avoid fighting humans if possible.”

Racheal looked surprised. “Why would you fight your family?”

“First off, we are talking about young dumb teenage cougars. We’re aggressive by nature. When you add teenage hormones into the mix things get rough. Besides, fighting each other taught us to be better. Stronger. Faster.” He smiled. “It was also a helluva lot of fun.”

“I feel for your mother.”

Hunter’s smile reached his eyes. “She's an amazing woman. I can't wait for you to meet her.”

He saw Racheal blanch. Smelled her fear. “Racheal?”

She recovered quickly. “What happened with Lilith?”

He knew he'd been diverted on purpose. He chose to let it go. “Lilith and I were together every day. When she was gone for almost an entire evening, I went looking for her.”

“Was she okay?”

“She was in bed with two men.”

Racheal pursed her lips. “Oh, no. What did she do?”

“She invited me to join them.”

“She wasn't embarrassed or ashamed?”

“No. I met her when she was with other men. She had never promised me anything. I was to blame, not her.”

“You cared for her. Maybe even loved her. I'm sure you felt betrayed,” she said.

“I did. I beat the shit out of the men, almost killing one before dragging Lilith back to our tent.”

“What did she do?”

“She wasn't mad. She said I overreacted. She forgave me but I was young and convinced she was my mate.”

“What did you do?”

“I tried to force my cat to mark her.”

Racheal pulled back further. “What happened.”

“Our animals can’t be forced to mate. My cat did the only thing it could. It disconnected from me.”

Racheal leaned forward. “Disconnected? How does that work?”

He could see her interest and was thankful for it. “Our animal has very few primal needs. Hunt. Mate. Protect. Those are the main ones. If we don't meet our animal's needs, they pull away until we do. Left too long we become unstable.”

He could see her mind working. “What happens during this disconnect? Are you aware it's happening?”

“It's nothing short of a warning. We lose our senses first. Then our urges become unstable. Then, if we don't rectify the issue, our animal loses faith and we go insane.”

“So, your cat disconnected?”

“Yes. I became violent. I was fighting with any man who looked at Lilith. She couldn't handle my outbursts and finally left me.”

Racheal’s eyes narrowed. “There's more.”

He wanted to leave it there. He hated this part. “I fucked any woman that would have me. My anger became so bad I was banned from local bars. By the time Talen showed up, I hadn't shifted in over a month and was lit up like a Christmas candle.”

“What does that mean?”

“My eyes were amber all the time.”

“No one questioned the change in your eyes?”

“They thought I had liver disease. I was drinking as much as I was fucking. It was a rational assumption,” he said.

“How did you get straightened out?”

“My brother Talen. He showed up, took one look at me and told me I was going home.”

“You went?”

“Not willingly. He had to beat the shit out of me. My cat finally defended me when it realized Talen would kill me. Shifting that day was the start of my recovery.”

“Your brother wouldn't have killed you though, right?”

He wanted to reassure her. Still, he had to tell her the truth. “He would've had no choice. He was the enforcer at the time. I was endangering the lair as well as hurting humans for no decent reason.”

“You said he was the enforcer of your lair. He isn't anymore?”

“The enforcer is the oldest unmated male. Talen is mated with cubs on the way and the leader of our lair. His priority is to defend his family and our territory."

“The Kallans’ said you are the second oldest. Does that mean you’re the enforcer now?”

“Yes. This will be my last mission in that capacity.”

She sucked in a breath. “You can't mate me.”

“I understand your reluctance. I betrayed you...”

Racheal put her hand on his chest. “You didn't betray me. You fell in love with the wrong person. It happens to everyone. You can't mate me because I will die. All the research I have says if your cat becomes attached to me you will die shortly after me. I want you to have a life.”

His cat surged, letting him know it would follow her in death if necessary. He had told her his darkest secret - his ultimate betrayal of her and his family. She cared only about his future. He did something he should have done years before. He thanked his stubborn cat. It had waited for her. Even if they only had a few weeks. A few days. She was worth it. “There is no me without you, Racheal. You were made for me. Even if I never mark you. You are mine and I won't live long in this world without you in it.”

She closed her eyes. “No,” she croaked.

He kissed her eyes and her cheek. The salty taste of her tears tickled his lips. “Be with me, Racheal. If it's just tonight. So be it. Be with your mate.”

She circled his neck. “Yes.”