Chapter 13
Elizabeth
At six on the dot my alarm clanged me awake. Monday, the first day of class.
I rolled over, expecting to see Declan’s chiseled face resting against my extra pillow, but he was gone.
Relief hit. No morning chitchat or awkward kisses goodbye.
Yet …
I was disappointed too. For the first time, I wanted the guy to still be there. I wanted to caress my fingers across his tattooed arm and wish him good morning. Sadly, the only thing remaining of him was the scent of his spicy cologne on my pillow. I picked it up and inhaled for exactly ten seconds longer than I should have.
I wasn’t creepy at all. Nope.
I showered, put on makeup, and dressed in a pair of bright red short-shorts and a vintage peasant shirt with cream embroidery, another one of Shelley’s purchases for me. We’d gotten the shirt at a consignment shop downtown, and although it had been too big, she’d taken in the sleeves and bust to fit me. She had an eye for fashion, and I tended to listen to her, especially considering I’d grown up wearing hand-me-downs from wherever my mom could get them. We’d never had much, and what’s funny is I hadn’t even realized it until I’d gotten in at Oakmont Prep and seen how the other half lived—fancy cars, designer clothes, Louis Vuitton backpacks.
Money and power everywhere.
I’d wanted to be part of it—desperately.
I’d figured out quick that the only way to fit in was to pretend to be like them, and I had with the help of Shelley. I’d been young and impressionable and eager to make friends—who turned out to not be real friends.
Everyone but Shelley and Blake had rejected me after Colby told his lies.
After parking my car and trekking across campus, I settled in a seat in my first class, an elective English Literature class taught by Dr. Feldman, one of the toughest professors on campus.
I craned my head to scan the auditorium, searching for Colby’s sandy hair. What if I ended up in a class with him? Now that I didn’t have Declan to distract me, the dread piled up. What was I going to do when I saw him on campus?
Blake came in and took the seat next to me. We’d filled out our schedules at registration together last spring so we could get in some of the same classes.
He tapped me on the arm. “Hey, how’s it going? I wish you could have gone to lunch with us yesterday.”
“Sorry, it was a hectic day.” Understatement.
He exhaled heavily.
“What?” I asked.
He rubbed his face briskly and then looked at me for a few ticks. He seemed to come to some kind of decision. “I—it’s just—I really need to tell you something, and there never seems to be a good time.”
I cleared my throat, feeling nervous. I didn’t want to have that conversation.
He checked his watch. “We still have five minutes. Let’s go outside and talk. Right now. We’ll get this all out on the table, and you’ll know exactly what’s been wrong with me lately.”
“Class is about to start and Dr. Feldman is a stickler for being on time. Why don’t we meet later—?”
He groaned his frustration, his mouth tightening as he glared at me.
“Don’t be that way. You’re acting like a baby.”
He closed his eyes and then popped them open. “Fine. You want to know what’s eating me? I’m in love with you, Elizabeth, and I have been since Oakmont. You know it. I know it. Hell, all of Whitman knows it. I’m sick of sitting back and watching you screw guys and never pick me. It’s a new year for both of us, and I want you to think about maybe … me and you … together.”
No. This wasn’t happening. I couldn’t take this. Not with the specter of Colby hanging over me. “Blake, we did this before—”
He held a hand up, interrupting me. “That was two years ago, and you gave me up for Colby.”
I stared at him, remembering all the times he’d picked me up for school when I didn’t have a ride, the times he’d sat in the diner where I waited tables just to keep me company.
I did love him in way, but it wasn’t a gut-wrenching, I-might-die-if-I-don’t-see-you kind of love. It was easy and soft, like a warm blanket on a winter’s night in front of the fire.
Could there be more with him?
He fiddled with his notebook, his eyes jumping to my face and then glancing back down. “The thing is, we are perfect for each other, you just don’t see it. I already know everything about you. Your favorite color, the kinds of books you like to read, the songs you love. I know you want to get a tattoo, but you can’t afford it. Hell, I even know you snore when you sleep—”
“Blake, stop, please. I can’t do this right now. We’re in the middle of class.”
Pressure, pressure.
“Why not? Because you’re afraid I’m right? You and I were meant to be from the very beginning, and you just got sidetracked by Colby.” Intensity laced his voice, making me squirm.
My rules had no room for a serious relationship—even with Blake. “Please—just let it go.”
He slumped down in his seat and shook his head angrily.
Thank goodness a sleepy-eyed Dax strolled into the auditorium right then, getting my attention. He was wearing skinny jeans, high-tops, a WU shirt, and an infectious grin that looked like trouble with a capital T. He gave Blake a fist bump and plopped down in the seat on the other side of me. Completely oblivious to the tension. Aren’t most guys?
He gave me a wide grin, and I had to smile back. His face brightened even more. “Hiya. I take it you’ve forgiven me for being sloshed on Friday night?”
I nodded. “Declan’s more than made up for your shortcomings.”
He grinned and shrugged, the movement reminding me of Declan. “Indeed, he’s the good one.”
More students piled in, including Declan, who stalked in wearing frayed jeans and a shirt that showcased his muscled chest to perfection. My eyes feasted on his forearms, tracing the lines of his skulls and roses. Last night, he’d held me tight as if he were afraid I’d slip away—yet he was the one who left without saying goodbye.
This morning I’d been partly relieved and disappointed he was gone, but that feeling had morphed into being pissed. And me being mad over him—made me madder.
I didn’t want to care that he’d left.
That didn’t stop the heat from settling in me when his gray eyes met mine.
He walked over to us, his gaze locked with mine the entire way.
“Hey.” I cleared my throat to get rid of the nervousness. “We’re being geeks and sitting up front. You wanna join us?”
He flicked his eyes from Dax to Blake on either side of me, almost as if he’d ask one of them to get up, but that was completely insane.
He shrugged broad shoulders. “I’ll just sit behind you guys.”
It was stadium style seating, so he had to take the stairs and then turn down the row behind us. He selected the seat behind me.
And even though we weren’t touching, I could feel him there, the warmth from his skin radiating across to mine.
Dax ran his eyes over the syllabus that had been left on the top of each desk. “I’m not quite sure how I ended up here. I must have had a hangover when I selected courses.” He checked out the female students who were coming in. “Although I have to admit, there are some hotties in here.”
“And you?” I turned around to look at Declan. “Do you like literature?”
“I’m an English major with a minor in business,” Declan said.
“No way.”
His lips quirked. “Yes, way. And why not?”
“I’m just surprised. I just assumed …”
“He’s a Neanderthal?” Dax said. “Most people do, but bro here is a sucker for poems and sonnets, boring tosh that makes me want to shoot myself. He’s overcompensating by opening his own gym soon.”
“You two are completely opposite,” I mused.
Dax snorted. “So, I’m the Neanderthal?”
I laughed. “No. Okay, maybe.”
A flurry of activity came from the door, and we turned to see a petite brunette in a tube top and short-shorts make a beeline for us. Lorna from the frat house. Fabulous.
She came to a halt in front of Blake, and when she took in that there wasn’t an empty seat next to him, she sent me an evil look and then moved her gaze to Declan.
“Is the seat next to you free?” she asked with a pout.
My eyes narrowed.
Had Declan slept with her?
Ugh.
Why did I care?
“Yeah,” Declan nodded, his eyes off me and on her.
“Awesome,” she said with a bright smile and made her way over to his aisle.
“She’s pretty hot, huh?” Dax whispered to me as she and Declan took up a close conversation after she got settled. “She’s limber too. All the brothers at the house love it. She can do this thing where she puts her legs behind her head and—”
“Stop.”
He grinned sheepishly. “I’m teasing. It’s her tube tops that keeps us riveted. Blokes keep waiting for one to fall off.”
I snapped my fingers. “Shucks. If only I had the guts to wear one I could be just like Limber Lorna—my dream.” I batted my eyelashes.
He laughed loudly, causing Declan to send us a sharp glare. What was his problem?
“If you do, pick a blue one to match your eyes. They’re gorgeous,” Dax said.
I blushed. “That’s sweet—and oddly the most sincere thing you may have ever said to me. Thank you, Dax. I think you’ve more than made up for almost kissing me.”
“Almost? Trust me, love, there was some lip-on-lip action. Don’t you remember?” He leaned in and gave me a quick peck on the cheek, his full lips brushing against my skin, sending little tingles over me.
A chuckle erupted from me. With no alcohol on his breath and no crazy party going on in the background, his kiss didn’t bother me at all.
“What’s so funny? That was grade-A kissing right there from the Sex Lord,” he said, pretending to be affronted by my laughter.
I rubbed my lips. “You gave me goosebumps, goof.”
“Goosebumps today, orgasm later?”
I barked out a laugh. “Do you ever stop with the flirting?”
“I can’t. It’s like I’m hardwired to get as many girls as I can. It’s probably a coping mechanism because my mum died when I was young.” He sent me a rueful look.
He’d said it all as a joke, but underneath I sensed the truth. “Sorry. Declan mentioned some of what you went through when you came here. It must have been hard leaving everything behind for the United States.”
“Yeah, people talk funny here, and you have weird names for things. For us a lift is an elevator, a chip is a French fry, a biscuit is a cookie, a shag is a fuck, and don’t even get me started on football.” He waggled his eyebrows.
Declan cleared his throat, and I tossed a glance back to see him glaring at both of us. His hands sat on top of his desk, one clutching his pen tightly.
I arched a brow at him. Don’t even go there with me, buddy. You have no right to be jealous. You left me this morning, I wanted to yell out.
Blake leaned over until our shoulders touched. He’d been quiet since the twins sat down. “Want to grab lunch later?”
I thought about it. With Colby walking around, I didn’t want to be alone. “You mind if we ask these guys to come too?” I nodded toward the twins. “And maybe Shelley?” I wasn’t ready for the talk he’d mentioned, and I needed a buffer between us.
“Something wrong with just me?”
“No, of course not. I just want to branch out and get to know more people.”
Like a normal college girl.
Dr. Feldman came into the auditorium, saving me from Blake’s reply. She was a tall, sparse lady with long brown hair she kept in a thick braid down her back, and her face was like stone, making you wonder if she ever smiled.
Wire-framed spectacles sat on the end of her nose as she swept beady eyes across the auditorium. “I trust you’ve all read the reading list I provided when you registered?”
Silence.
“I see. Another stellar class.” Disdain dripped from her words. She shuffled some papers. “Well, for the first few weeks, we’re going to be studying Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice. I do expect classroom participation, so be aware that when I call on you you’re required to stand and present your discussion.”
Dax’s hand shot up, and she waved at him to stand.
He did. “Do you grade on our discussion?”
She arched a derisive eyebrow. “Of course.”
He shot her a cocky grin. “Brilliant, because I’m a great talker.” He plopped back down.
“Any more questions before I call roll?” she asked, looking around the room.
No one moved.
“Fine.” She ran her finger down what I assumed was the class roster and chuckled. “Is there seriously an Elizabeth Bennett in this class?”
I raised my hand tentatively. “That would be me.”
“Please stand when you speak, Miss Bennett, so the entire class can see and hear you.” She raked her eyes over me as I stood. “I confess, I’m extremely curious … did your parents name you after the book?”
I straightened my shoulders. “My parents never married, so Bennett’s my mother’s name. Elizabeth is just a name my mother picked. I doubt my parents had ever heard of Jane Austen.” I shrugged. “I didn’t discover Pride and Prejudice until high school.”
She tapped her pencil against her leg. “Are you looking for your Mr. Darcy here at Whitman, Miss Bennett?”
My face flushed and I blinked. “I—I’m not looking for love, Dr. Feldman, just an education.”
“Hmm, I see. But as humans aren’t we naturally inclined to seek out love? Elizabeth found her soulmate. Don’t you want to find yours?”
“No.”
She gave me a surprised look. “Ah, I see. That might be a discussion for another day then. You may sit.”
I sat down, relieved.
“Bugger, you could have warned me how scary she is,” Dax leaned over and whispered.
I shrugged. “Wait until she asks hard questions. I heard at least half of all her students drop after the first day.”
Feldman’s voice interrupted us. “Mr. Declan Blay, please stand if you are present today.”
Rustling motions came from behind me as Declan stood. “Present.” His husky, clipped voice sent shivers over me.
She nodded, her eyes gliding over the muscles in his arms then coming back to rest on his face. “Mr. Blay, I trust you’ve read the required first ten chapters of Pride and Prejudice before today’s class?”
“Not precisely.”
She bristled. “I don’t tolerate students who don’t follow directions or complete homework assignments.”
Declan cocked his head. “No, let me explain—”
She cut him off. “Please sit down so I can call on someone who’s read the material.”
“I’ll take my chances if you don’t mind, Dr. Feldman.” He crossed his arms and sent her an expectant look.
She waved her hand. “Fine. Tell us about our heroine. What do you think of our Elizabeth Bennett?”
He rubbed the slight shadow on his face. “She’s witty and spirited and the one least expected to marry a rich man, although she does by the end of the book.” His gray eyes lazily brushed over me. “She’s also a beautiful girl who likes the rain.”
My heart thundered. God, it sounded like he was talking about me.
“Would you say she’s the perfect woman, Mr. Blay?”
He blinked. “I don’t believe in the perfect woman, just the right woman. Elizabeth knows she isn’t perfect, but neither is Darcy. They’re both flawed people who are at times too proud to admit their own true feelings—hence the title.”
I admit it. His understanding of the theme of the book made me hot. Right then and there, I wanted to toss him down on the floor, crawl on top of him, and ride him like the Jane Austen reader I was.
“What are Elizabeth’s flaws, then?” Dr. Feldman asked him.
“She’s defensive—because of her family—and it affects her relationship with Darcy. She assumes he’s a rich arsehole when he’s actually in love with her.”
“You seem to have a grasp on the entire novel, yet you didn’t read the assignment.” Her high heels clacked over to the front row so she could peer more closely at him. “Explain yourself.”
“I’ve read it several times, Dr. Feldman, just not recently, and I was in the process of explaining when you interrupted me.” He paused. “Pride and Prejudice is one of my favorite books. My mum read it to me when I was a kid. She was a huge romantic … and perhaps I am as well.”
Girls swooned. Literally. I could hear them, melting in their seats as his softly rounded vowels washed over them.
I wasn’t too far behind them. Heck, I’d already pictured us lying in a pile of old books, stark naked and smoking a satisfying cigarette after boinking each other’s brains out.
Lorna clapped daintily, her eyes enraptured by Declan’s question-answering skills. I rolled my eyes.
“So awesome,” she whispered to him. “I’ll have to read it for sure now.”
Feldman studied him, and I thought I detected a little bit of swoon in her expression too. “I look forward to calling on you again. Please be seated.”
After class finished, I turned to a glum Blake, whose hair was standing up everywhere from raking his hands through it. “Shit, this class is killer. There’s no way I can do it.”
“You’re dropping my dream class?” I patted his hair down, some of the earlier weirdness fading.
He sighed and stood. “Yep. I’m heading over to the registrar’s to take care of it. See you at lunch?” He fidgeted, waiting for me to reply.
“Sure.” I couldn’t say no.
We made plans to meet later, and he headed down the stairs and out the door.
I gathered my notebook and pens with a grin. Even though Feldman was tough as nails, I was excited about digging into this class.
Plus Declan was here. But he’s trouble, remember? a voice in my head reminded me.
“You’re a weird chick. You act like this class was fun,” Dax said as he watched me gather my things.
“True,” I said.
He laughed, and with Declan and Lorna trailing behind us, we headed for the exit.
We all came to a rather odd standstill outside the auditorium. No one seemed to know what to say next except for Lorna, who apparently knew both brothers well and kept the conversation going.
She looped her arm with Declan’s. “You wanna go back to your place and study later?”
She may have liked Blake at one point, but I got the distinct impression she’d switched over to Declan.
“Study is apparently code for let’s have sex,” I whispered to Dax, who smirked.
“You look awesome today, by the way,” Lorna said, continuing her flattery of Declan as she reached up to brush imaginary lint off his shirt.
Ugh. Enough.
I didn’t want to watch this, and I came to a rapid decision.
I turned to Dax. “I’m going to grab some lunch at the Student Center at noon with Blake. You want to come?”
His eyes lit up. “Sure.” He looked over his shoulder. “Hey, you guys want to join us on our date?”
“Date?” Declan came to attention, and his eyes bounced from me to Dax.
He nodded. “It appears Miss Bennett has forgiven me for trying to kiss her and has invited me to lunch. Want to join us or do you have awesome plans with Lorna?”
Declan cracked his neck and stared at us both, his gaze intense as if measuring the situation. “That’s okay. Maybe next time,” he said curtly and stalked off with Lorna half running beside him like a little puppy.
Pfft.
Dax watched her ass swing from side to side. “Guess he had plans.”
“Uh-huh.”
He snorted. “You have to admit. She’s bloody awesome.”
He looped an arm around me and walked me to my next class.