Penny
I arrange and rearrange the flowers on Aunt Julie’s grave before I stand and ready myself to go. The cemetery is quiet, just a lawn mower somewhere in the distance and a few birds chirping in the large oak tree overhead.
Like a hundred times before when I’ve needed her, Aunt Julie has listened to me cry and talk for over an hour and a half. Sometimes I’m here to share happy stories, sometimes I just need to sit in the peace and quiet. I’ve asked her so many questions over the years, and though the answers don’t come as quick as I like, I do like to think she guides where I’m supposed to be. I wonder now if I’ve gotten myself too far off the right track for even her to help me.
There’s nothing more to say. I walk the long path back to my car and stare at the cloudless blue sky. I can’t blame Dalton any more than you can blame a bee for stinging you. Use your good judgement, leave it alone, and you’ll be fine. Trap it in your hand, and you’re asking for the pain.
Knowing the blame rests on my shoulders doesn’t really dull the pain of having to face my sister in a few days. The only thing worse than that will be facing my mother. She’s bilingual in passive-aggressive language of the I told you so tribe.
“Penny,” Dalton says, making me jump. “I didn’t mean to scare you. I thought you’d be here.”
“Dalton.” I gulp, amazed he was able to find me. He was listening.
“I called your father and asked where she was buried. He was kind of stunned, but eventually he told me. I didn’t know if you’d be here.”
“You shouldn’t have come,” I say, brushing the tears off my cheeks. “I don’t want to see you.”
“I can help you, Penny,” Dalton says, looking like if he doesn’t save the day right now he’ll die. “I put a call into a lawyer who specializes in residential leases. He’s going to do what he—”
“Please stop,” I beg, blinking the tears away. “I can’t do this, Dalton. I get that you had a part to play, and you did it really well. I don’t even blame you. If the situations were reversed my sister would have probably done the same thing. You all focus on what you want, and you don’t let anything . . . or anyone get in your way. I knew it. I understood it. And I let this happen anyway. I’m not blaming you. I should have known better.” You win. You’ll always win.
“I never meant to hurt you. That’s not why I took the lease.” His brows knit together, and I can’t read his expression. My phone dings with a message from Ben. He’s proclaiming Dalton’s innocence. I don’t know what to believe.
“I will fix this, Penny. You can believe that.”
“Do whatever you want, Dalton. It doesn’t matter anymore.”
“What do you mean?” Dalton asks, as he leans against my car and eyes me nervously.
“There is this huge canyon between you and me. You’re over there on one side with people like my mom and my sister. You want success and money. You have no trouble sending your dad’s calls to voicemail. You have no problem kicking him out. Business comes first. People like me and my father are just fools in your eyes. Judging by how all this turned out, maybe you’re right.”
“Penny—”
“I’m glad you didn’t go out of your way to hurt me or my sister. That’s great. But it doesn’t change the fact that you and I have absolutely nothing in common. We wouldn’t stand a chance even under the best circumstance. And these are not the best circumstances. I get it, every man in that place wanted me out. You all had the perfect microcosm, and I disrupted it. It’s over.”
“This was not a game for me. I’m not them.”
“Great.” I shrug, feeling completely defeated. “But you aren’t who I thought you were either.” I meet his eyes. “That man would have told me.”
Dalton drops his eyes toward the gravel and draws in a deep breath as he pulls an envelope from his pocket. “This is for your father. He has something special where he is, and I came up with some ways to monetize not his clientele but the employers looking for his services. Digital companies that aggregate résumés charge a fee and don’t have nearly the success rate your father reports. If you can help him organize his files and run some data, he can turn things around.” His voice trails off for a moment. “The details don’t matter, but he can stay in business if he makes these changes. It shouldn’t affect the front end of his business at all.”
I take the envelope from his hand and stare at him in disbelief. I need him to be the jerk I convinced myself he was. That’s how this is supposed to work. Even if the canyon shrunk by half, we’d still be too far from each other to ever make this work.
“If you need something else, you know where to find me.”
I watch him walk away and feel my heart tug in that direction. Breaking into a full run and leaping into his arms would feel pretty damn good right now. But my words remain true. The equation of Dalton and me just doesn’t add up to happiness for either one of us.
“Thanks for the stuff for my dad.” My voice breaks with emotion and for the first time I see the profound impact my pain has on him. It’s written on his face.
“Have him call me with any questions.”
“I will.” I hesitate as my heart sinks. “I’m sorry for how much this screwed up your life. I know you were happy before me.”
Dalton turns only halfway around and I can see the pain in the creases of his expression.
“I was different, that’s for damn sure.”