"Where's Jane?" was the first thing Jesse said as he took off his helmet. He looked around as he finished getting off of his motorcycle, running his hand through his hair as if to make sure the helmet hadn't left it in disarray. Judging from the way my heart pounded, the last two months had done nothing to quench my desire for him.
The sound of Elvis mimicking a siren and then saying, "Intruder alert!" served as a distraction, and I glanced at the bird with a smile.
"Jane's on her way," Ivy said once Elvis stopped squawking. "She stopped to pick up the food."
Something about the way she said it made me realize this was a planned, family get-together. I got up from my stool, picking up my bag with every intention of leaving right then.
"I'm gonna go on home," I said.
"Nooo!" Aunt Ivy insisted. "Jane would want you to stick around. She's picking up food from Van's on her way over here, and we're gonna have plenty. You should stay."
"Ohh, I can't," I said. "I have to be going."
"Your dad said you've been busy helping your boyfriend," Aunt Ivy said, assuming that's where I had to go.
I smiled even though I felt nauseous.
I didn't even look at Jesse.
"Yes ma'am," I said. "He's getting better now, though."
"That's why she's up here working again," Uncle Michael said, gesturing to my bag.
"When'd you start working here again?" Jesse asked.
I looked at him, noticing the unemotional way he leaned against the countertop and regarded me. "I just dropped by to look at my notes from before," I said, glancing around at everyone and feeling shy even though they were my family. I smiled at Jesse. "Today was my first time back," I said, shrugging and patting my bag to indicate that it contained some of my paperwork. I regarded Michael. "I'll look at this stuff over the weekend, but I'm sure I'll be in a little next week, if that's okay."
He smiled and gave me a sweet nod.
"You sure you can't stay?" Aunt Ivy asked. "Jane's gonna be upset about missing you."
I shook my head regretfully. "I just saw her last night, though."
"Oh, that's right," Ivy said. "She said you watched Shelby while she went to band practice."
Just then, we saw headlights shining into the garage through the open door. Jane pulled right into the shop, leaving the back half of her car sticking out. She beeped her horn, which everybody but me had been expecting. Ivy faked surprise by sticking her fingers in her ears and a making silly expression, and Shelby got out of car, giggling at our reactions.
"You almost scared me to death on that one," Ivy said to Shelby, who continued giggling as she ran across the garage, headed toward us.
To Shelby, Aunt Ivy was Shug and Uncle Michael was Doozy, and she ran up to them, calling their names.
Ivy scooped Shelby up and positioned her on her hip, but my attention was drawn to Jane who was now out of the car. She walked toward us with her hands full of paper bags from Van's Diner. Jesse and I both had the same idea, and we went over there to offer her help. Jane handed Jesse the bags and kissed him on the cheek before reaching out to hug me.
I squeezed her tightly and was about to say something about the fact that I was on my way out, but she turned right around and started walking toward her family, pulling me with her.
"Can you believe this is mine now?" she asked in an awestruck tone.
"No," I said, looking at the beautiful motorcycle. "It's so nice. And I didn't know there was a whole story behind it."
"Oh, yeah," she said, pointing at the wheel. "Dad popped off one of the spokes to make a ring for mom."
We all glanced at the tires even though there was no way we could notice the missing spoke at a glance.
"What was up with Barrett last night?" Jane asked. She scowled as she said it, and then she pulled back so she could look directly at me, waiting for me to answer.
I just shrugged shyly, knowing that everyone was listening to us. "He's just like that," I said. "The draft is coming up, and he knows it's not going to happen for him this year. Not with his leg like it is." I paused and shook my head thinking of all the stuff he had said over the past couple of months. "I don't think he believes he'll play again," I said.
"So that's just how he acts now?" Jane asked still looking at me like she was a bit confused. "Rude?"
I smiled and nodded, trying to remember what Barrett had even said to her the night before. I couldn't recall what he said. "What'd he say to you?" I asked.
She looked at me like she couldn't believe I didn't know. "It wasn't what he said to me. It was what he said to you. Do you not remember him getting onto you for forgetting to take back that movie?"
"Oh yeah, but I did it on my way home last night," I said. "It didn't even get a late fee; I don't know what he was so upset about."
Jane still stared at me with a confused expression. "I can't believe he just acts like that."
"He's been through a lot lately," I said, trying my best to delicately get out of the conversation.
I was already mortified by the fact that we were having this conversation in front of Jesse. He was standing right there, listening to everything we said. I felt like I needed to take up for Barrett, while at the same time I wanted to breakdown and tell them what a horrible person he was.
Shelby giggled as Ivy placed her on the motorcycle, and they all started joking about Shelby being a mini version of Jane. Jane had her arm around my shoulder, but she let go of me to go interact with her little girl.
I felt like it was as good a time as any for me to say goodbye, so I took a step back and prepared to announce my departure. I breathed in to say something, but I saw Jesse step next to me out of the corner of my eye. He stood close enough that I glanced his way instead of making my planned exit. I expected Jesse to smile at me when I did, but his expression remained serious as he glanced at me.
"I'm not okay with him treating you bad, Rose."
I hadn't expected him to say that, so I took a step back shaking my head like it had all been a big misunderstanding.
"Barrett? He's fine, it's fine, I'm just helping him while he gets back on his…"
I trailed off. I tilted my head, giving Jesse a regretful grin.
"What?" he asked.
"I guess its obligation at this point, if you want to know the truth. I'm with him out of obligation. But, hey, people have worse lots in life."
"Oh, so you're just sentenced to be with this guy for the rest of your life?" Jesse asked.
His tone was so matter-of-fact that I squinted at him. "No, I'm not. But I also don't know how to talk to him. He's so dependent on me. I don't even want to think about how he'd react."
It was a serious and sincere statement and I had been looking at Jesse with all earnestness when I said it, but I turned with a huge smile when I saw that Shelby was walking towards us. She put up her hands, and Jesse scooped her into his arms.
"Hey Belshe," Jesse said, teasing Shelby by mixing up her name.
She slapped her hand to her forehead. "Shelby!" she giggled.
"I mean Shelby!" Jesse said, correcting himself.
"Hi," she said, squeezing his neck.
I reached out and scratched her little back. "Hi and bye, punkin'," I said.
"Hi Aunt Wose," she said, turning to face me while still in Jesse's arms.
(She called me Aunt Rose even though I wasn't technically her aunt.)
"Hey peanut."
Shelby leaned over to kiss me and I lunged toward her so that I wouldn't leave her hanging. Instead of kissing me like I thought she would, she grabbed a hold of my head, positioning my face right next to Jesse's. She patted our cheeks and smiled contentedly as if she enjoyed seeing us lined up like this. I kissed Jesse on the cheek before leaning forward to do the same to Shelby.
"I love my family," I said, after making the smooching sound on Shelby's cheek. "I'm glad I got to see your new toy, Jane," I announced, waving in the direction of the other three who were huddled around the motorcycle.
"Thank you!" Jane called, waving at me while wearing a disappointed look on her face. "Are you sure you have to go? We have plenty of food, and I can take you for a ride on it if you want."
"She is not ready for that," Michael said, shaking his head and closing his eyes. "Give her a few months to practice, and she'll take you for a ride."
"I'll take you for ride," Jesse said.
He spoke to me and not the others, but Shelby also heard, and she threw up her arms and squealed with delight. "I wanna go!"
Jesse looked at Shelby. "I'll take you around the parking lot in a minute, squirt," he said before focusing on me. "It's too bad you're in such a big hurry. I was gonna take Jane out around Birk's farm. I wish you could come with us."
"You mean on motorcycles?" I asked.
Jesse smiled at me as if we both knew the answer to that question.
"I'm serious," I said. "Are you taking her over there on motorcycles?"
He nodded. "You'd be riding with me."
"Is Rose coming with us?" Jane asked from across the way.
"Yep," Jesse said without even waiting for my answer.
I wrinkled my nose at him, and he gave me a challenging smile.
"What? You know you want to," he said, grinning irresistibly.
"I want to!" said Shelby with delight.
"You need to come eat first while your food is still warm," Jane said, digging in the bags.
I glanced at Jesse and gave him a resigned smile before looking at Uncle Michael. "Do you mind if I use the phone in the conference room real fast?"
He was in the middle of helping Jane distribute burgers but he gave me a smile and waved at me as if to say I knew I could make myself at home there.
"Is it locked?" I asked as I went toward the door.
"The office door locked behind you, but there's a phone in the waiting room," Ivy said.
The waiting room was really close to the garage, so I made it there quickly. I ducked inside and took a seat on the row of padded chairs that lined the wall. There was a simple desk phone on a nearby table, and I picked up the receiver and dialed Barrett's number.
He answered on the second ring. "Hello?"
"Hey," I said.
"Where are you?"
"I'm still at my uncle's shop."
"I still haven't eaten dinner. I called your apartment, and Rebecca had no idea where you were."
"I told you where I was. I told you I was coming up here to get started on this paperwork."
"I know, but that was like three hours ago."
"That's how long it took me. And I have a lot more to do. I'm going to be up here a lot of hours workin' on this project. I told you that."
"Well, I tried to call the number you gave me, and nobody picked up."
He sounded agitated, and honestly, I was so frustrated that I didn't care. I sighed and buried my face in my hand as I sat there in the mostly dark waiting room.
"I'm sorry nobody picked up, Barrett. I was working. I just finished, and I am calling to let you know that I'm going to eat a bite of dinner with my family and maybe go for a drive."
"A drive?" he asked the question like he must have heard me wrong. "Did you say you're going on a drive?"
"Probably. After we eat."
"I'm really glad you're thinking about me, Rose that's really nice of you. I'm just sitting over here starving and having no idea what you're doing."
"If you're starving, Barrett, you need to stand up, walk out the door, and go get yourself some food. If you can't make it that far, you can just look in your fridge. I put a bunch of food in your fridge." I really wanted to stay and hang out with my family, so my tone was unsympathetic.
He paused for what felt like a full minute before speaking again. "I need you," he said. "I was just getting used to you being home for the summer, and now you're trying to commit to helping your family. You spread yourself too thin."
"I'm not spread too thin," I said. "And I'm not helping them. They're helping me."
"What time are you coming over here?" he asked pitifully.
"A little later," I said. "I was thinking about not stopping by tonight at all. I still have a lot to do with this paperwork."
"Rose, please," he said.
I turned to find Jane standing in the doorway. She was leaning against the doorframe with a cautious expression, and I held my finger up telling her I would just be a minute.
"I can't believe going for a drive is more important to you than helping me out."
"Well, I'm sorry. I'm sad you're giving me a hard time about it."
I looked at Jane with a regretful smile. I was embarrassed to have this conversation in front of her, but at the same time I was happy she came back there. She furrowed her eyebrows when I made the statement about Barrett giving me a hard time, but shook my head as reassurance that I was fine.
"Barrett, I'm going to hang out with my family for little bit," I said. "Jane's right here waiting for me. I'll call you in a little while."
"Okay," Barrett said, knowing my tone was impassive. "But please come by tonight," he said. "I wanted you to take me by Mikey's."
"I don't know what time I'm going to be done," I said. "Maybe you should tell Mikey to come get you."
"Maybe you should try to help me out sometimes," he said, sounding annoyed.
"I do that all the time," I said, trying to keep my one-sided conversation vague for Jane's sake.
"Except for when I need some Taco Bell or a ride to Mikey's," he said. He was trying to make it seem like he was joking, but I knew he was being serious.
"Okay," I said. "So I'll call you later."
"Love you," he said.
And, in spite of it perhaps being the most awkward thing that had ever come out of my mouth, I repeated the dreaded, untruthful phrase just for the sake of getting off the phone.
"Love you too," I said, trying to sound like I meant it. I was so disgusted with myself and I hung up the phone without even hearing if he responded.