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Just Pretend by Juliana Conners (191)



 

 

I can’t believe the text I’m looking at.

It’s from Mandy’s mother.

Mandy’s been hospitalized. She won’t be able to make the conference competition.

I’ve had to read it several times to make sure it said what I thought it said.

Poor Mandy.

And she’s one of the most talented cheerleaders on our team. Our conference competition that can make or break Nationals is right around the corner.

It took me a minute to catch up with reality, right when I was in the middle of seeing Wesley again. I’d been hanging back and avoiding him lately, not wanting to be pushy and annoying like the cheerleaders at his old school. And not wanting to be as silly as they were, thinking that he and I had something serious going.

But when I saw him, I couldn’t believe how much electricity still exists between us. I want to believe he’s as happy to have seen me as he looked.

I was a bit disappointed when he hadn’t seemed to remember my upcoming competition. Then he’d said he’d remembered it but that it was on a different day than the Frisbee game to which he was inviting me.

He obviously didn’t seem to understand that it took a lot of planning and practice and wasn’t just a one day deal. But I guess a lot of non-cheerleading people wouldn’t. So I’m willing to cut him some slack for that.

There’s no time to dwell on any of that now though. I’ve got to think about Mandy. And the rest of the squad.

After I break away from Wesley and as I hurriedly leave the pool, I text back: Where?

I text Taylor to meet me at the quad, and then I get another text from Mandy’s mom.

We’ll let you know shortly. We ask for no visitors at this time. Please keep this information confidential among only the captains for now until we figure out more information.

By the time I reach the quad, I’m a mess.

“Taylor!” I say, hugging her hard.

“What’s wrong?” she asks, holding onto me.

It’s also been a while since I’ve talked to Taylor. I was annoyed with her for butting in so much between Wesley and me. But now I just need her support.

“Look,” I tell her, showing her my phone with the texts from Mandy’s mom.

“Oh my god. That’s awful!”

“I know!”

We both cry, unable to hold back our sobs.

“I hope she’s going to be okay,” I say.

“I’m sure she will be,” Taylor reassures me. “Whatever’s wrong with her, she’s young and in good health.”

“I hate to mention it but…”

“Yeah,” Taylor says. “What about our routine?”

The routine I’d planned for the upcoming conference competition pretty much literally revolves around Mandy.

“I’m going to have to plan a new one,” I tell her. “There’s no way around it.”

“Couldn’t someone else just take her part?” she asks.

“No one else can do those tumbles and acrobatics. Plus, the lines would be all uneven.”

“This sucks.”

“Tell me about it,” I say. “I’ve been so torn trying to decide what to do about Wesley. Then my dad tells me he’s in super deep with your mom. Then this happens, which causes me to worry both about the future of Mandy and our conference competition chances. I just don’t know much more I can take.”

“Hold on,” says Taylor. “Back up. Your dad said he’s in deep with my mom?”

“Oh. Yeah. I mean, he didn’t come out and say it but he certainly implied it.”

I feel dumb. But clearly Taylor knew this information way before I did. It’s not like I was keeping a secret from her.

“And how exactly does that fact get added into the list of bad things that happened to you?”

I grimace.

Oops.

“It’s not a bad thing. It’s just that…”

“I knew it,” she says, practically exploding. “I knew there was a reason you’ve been so distant from me. You can’t just be happy for my mom. And your dad. Everything has to be about you.”

“Woah!”

Now I’m the one fuming mad.

“That is not true,” I tell her. “At least, not all of it. I haven’t been keeping my distance from you. Or if I have, a little, it’s just because…”

“Because what? Because I tried to give you some common sense advice about Wesley?”

“No!” I almost yell, frustrated beyond belief.

I hear Wesley’s voice in my ear, telling me how Taylor’s always acts like my mother figure. Maybe I just need some space from my “mom.”

Because you’re always trying to tell me what to do, I want to tell her.

But I really need Taylor right now. Neither of us may feel like best friends at the moment, but we are. We always have been, and we always will be.

“I’m sorry, Taylor,” I tell her, calming down long enough to give her a hug, which, thankfully, she returns.

“You’re right. I just… I just need a little freedom to make my own mistakes, I guess.”

Did I just admit that Wesley was a mistake?

 “Okay,” she says, holding up her hands. “I’ll try to remember that. I just can’t help but give you my opinion and try to help.”

“I know,” I tell her. “And usually I appreciate that. I really do. Right now, though, I just need a hug.”

“Now that I can definitely do,” she says, as she keeps holding me tight.

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