Scarlett trained harder than ever before, throwing herself full force at the sport. After all, it was the only thing she had left now. As expected, Lauren and Shane had offered a full-time position with room and board, but she flatly refused. They didn’t need a full-time handler, and she needed to solve her problems for herself.
In the months that followed, she worked hard to forge a grueling physical routine, to leave herself no time to dwell on anything but the upcoming race.
Early each morning, after feeding the “veterans,” she would hook up the puppies and run them in a tight circle with an empty sled behind them as she led the dogs through their paces. In this way, she was able to act as the lead dog and get her blood pumping as well.
Then after a quick breakfast, she would hook up Lauren’s team and take them for a workout around the property, normally sticking to twenty miles or so. She didn’t like running Lauren’s team as much as her own, but figured she’d need as much practice as possible because she was cramming for the biggest test in her life.
And she planned to pass with flying colors. She’d already passed the qualifying races and knew she had a place in the main event that year. What happened next would depend on how hard she trained and how well she focused, so she did just that, leaving little time for anything—or anyone—else.
For lunch, she would stop into the house and give Lauren a report on how her team did for the morning run and quiz Shane on any questions she’d come up with while out on the trail. She’d given up on reading books for her answers after the debacle at the library and when she’d made the mistake of reading a guide from a musher that was very much of the same mindset as Henry’s grandfather.
Whenever her thoughts turned to Henry, as they still inevitably did whenever she let her guard down, she would busy herself by working to further rehabilitate Fantine and the other rescue dogs. A few had adjusted well already and had already begun to crave running again, so three times a week she would hook them up and take them for short runs, too.
Before dinner, she would hook up “her” team. They were always excited to see her coming around with harnesses in hand. Fred would make sure to give her large, sloppy kisses when she got close enough to his little hut.
The days passed quickly this way. She woke up early and went to bed late, pushing her body to its limits and enjoying the newfound strength, both of muscles and of will. Shane and Lauren often exchanged pointed glances that suggested they spoke about her when she wasn’t around, that they worried about her—but she ignored their concerns.
She pushed harder, harder, harder, driven by both love and hate as she prepared for the upcoming Iditarod. It wouldn’t be long now. Even Fantine’s puppies had already neared their adult weights now. The world was speeding forward with or without Scarlett, and she did everything in her power to keep up.
One day she noticed one of the puppies, Lenny, looking at her wistfully as Scarlett readied her team for their after-dinner run.
“Hey there, little guy,” she cooed to the giant puppy. At just about five months old, he was already the same size as a few of the leaner dogs. She’d definitely named him right. “You want to go running with everyone else?”
He yowled in response—a special husky noise that showed just how excited he was. He’d done well in the mornings, so what could it hurt to give him a shot with the big dogs? Without giving any further thought to the matter, she harnessed him up and hooked him onto the sled. His eyes were wild with excitement, and for the first time, Scarlett noticed that like his mother, he had heterochromia. Though his discoloration wasn’t as pronounced, one blue eye was clearly darker than the other. Had they changed since birth, or had she just never looked at him closely enough before? It seemed odd, given all the time she spent in the company of the dogs and especially the puppies.
But she pushed the worry from her mind, lest her thoughts return to another person she knew with mismatched eyes—Henry. Instead of having Lenny run next to another dog, she left Lenny on his own. Normally, dogs would run in pairs, but Scarlett wanted to make sure he was going to be okay hooked to the big sled before she tried to pair him up. Then, like she’d done every day, she hollered to the dogs and away they went.
She’d expected Lenny to be a bit nervous with the bigger sled or the longer track, but he took to the new system like a duck to the water. Or rather, a sled dog to the snow. They took a shorter run, but by the end of it, she knew that Lenny had been born to race.
She told Lauren and Shane as much that night over dinner.
“You got one of the pups to go out with your team today?” Shane asked. “I’m impressed.”
“Which one?” Lauren asked, bringing over another delicious plate of vittles.
“Lenny,” Scarlett responded through forkfuls.
Shane laughed. “Well, he hardly counts a puppy. He’s practically the size of half the dogs out there.”
“You think you’ve got a new favorite?” Lauren asked. “Fred’ll be heart-broken, but by the time the Iditarod comes around, Lenny will probably be bigger than him.”
“Sometimes hearts break,” Scarlett answered with a shrug.
Shane and Lauren exchanged that well-practiced look, the one they always made when Scarlett’s behavior had started to concern them.
Lauren cleared her throat. “Umm, so we were thinking about heading into Anchorage next weekend. Meeting up with a few other mushers, just a casual get-together. We were wondering if—“
Scarlett held up her hand. “No, I’m just going to hang out here and see if I can find out who Lenny likes to run beside. If he’s going to be as big as you think, it might be good to have him with me on the way to Nome.”
Shane looked like he was about to say more, but Lauren brushed his arm and gave him that look again. He slowly rose with the help of his cane and an excuse about a TV program he wanted to watch, then left the women on their own.
“Okay, spill,” Lauren said. “What’s gotten into you?”
“You know what’s gotten into me. I lost my job and all I have left is this race. I have to do my best.”
“Are you sure? Because it seems like a whole lot more than that. You’re not yourself lately, Scar.”
“I’m exactly who I’ve always been. Just my competitive side has come out now.”
“No, Scarlett. This isn’t who you are, and frankly, sometimes you scare me these days. You know you can talk to me about anything, right?”
Scarlett sighed. “I know.”
“What’s wrong?”
“Everything,” Scarlett said on a sob. “Everything’s wrong, and I’m doing my best to make it right again, but what if my best isn’t enough?”
“Oh, Scar. We’ll figure it out together. I promise, Shane and I are here for you.”
She almost told Lauren everything in that moment. Almost told her of her attraction to Henry, their heated sled ride and secret texts, the inevitable betrayal that followed.
Almost.
But instead, she took another bite of dinner and swallowed her feelings down—down so deep she hoped they would drown.