When she found out the truth, she was going to hate me. As it was, I would go as far as saying she loved me. She’d never said the words aloud; it was something in her eyes.
Unlike me, Katie didn’t grow up in a loving family environment. Her father used her as collateral and left her, her mother abused her, and Annie let jealousy control her. I only married her as a friend—the only friend thing I’d ever done in my life. I tried to get her away from her parents whilst setting up the illusion we were a real couple. Her father would have cut her off, otherwise.
She was supposed to be on the same page as me.
When she realized I was after Katie, she made a few rash decisions that resulted in her ending up in her current state at my father’s.
“I think she’ll be okay,” my father commented, pulling me out of my head. I followed his gaze to where Katie sat talking to Declan.
No feelings of usual jealousy swarmed me. I’d encouraged them to grow close; she would need someone talk to and Declan was always more easy-going than I was. I trusted him. Seeing as he was helping me take over from my father, I didn’t have a choice.
When I looked back at my father, I didn’t see a man who only had six months left to live. I saw the replica of me. He always laughed his sickness off, saying the silent killer was the last thing he’d expected to take him out. And fuck, if it didn’t hurt knowing I was losing him. I wasn’t a pussy about admitting my feelings; I was a man who loved his father dearly and was months away from burying him. The dogs had been an excuse not to go home; his impending death was the real reason I couldn’t leave.
We both knew it, but neither of us would comment on it. The bitch that had claimed to adore him left as soon as he was diagnosed, dragging my sister along for the ride. He said it was for the best, and in that sense, I agreed with him. My father had never gotten over my mother; he still wore the ring, still carried a picture of her in his pocket.
I couldn’t imagine losing the object of my obsession. I imagined it would be a slow and painful demise to keep on going without the one thing that made the fire burn in your veins.
That was his biggest issue with Katie.
I hoped he saw earlier that she truly could thrive in our family. It wasn’t about changing her; it was about making sure she adapted. I would never let her head drag her back down again—not if I could help it. It’s why I did all I had.
I’d planted the seed of unfathomable sin, and now it was time to nurture it. When the dark petals of depravity bloomed, she would be exquisite. All I could do then was hope she didn’t despise me for my actions, and hope I never lost control and turned her into another portrait on my walls.
“Being a little bit fucked up runs in our genetics,” Declan explained with a boyish smile.
I’d tried to avoid him after dinner, but Mason dragged me along to the game room so he and his father could play a round of pool, and Declan refused to go away.
“I don’t think he likes me,” I mumbled, looking away from Mason’s father, who was watching me again.
“Who? Uncle J? He doesn’t have any issue with you personally, Katie. You just remind him of someone, and he’s a protective asshole when it comes to me and Mason,” Declan explained.
Is that what a protective parent looked like? I’d never had one. No one had ever tried to protect me, except for Mason.
“What happened to her?” I asked after a prolonged moment of silence.
He didn’t answer me right away, seemingly thinking about his response.
“She killed herself,” he sighed. “If you want to get explicit, she tried to kill Uncle J, too. She drove their car off a cliff. Mason was too little to remember her, but she left a note for him explaining why she did it. He read it when we got a little bit older,” he explained.
His mother killed herself…
I looked around the massive house and took a quick peek at Mason’s father. It would all appear to be lovely to someone looking in: a wealthy man, a beautiful home, and a son. I knew better, though.
Sometimes, our heads could be a dangerous place. My mind had always been my own worst enemy. Declan’s next words solidified what I was already figuring out.
“I think she just wanted it all to end, ya know? From what my dad told me, she just lost touch with reality, wanted to give Mason a chance to have a normal childhood.”
We fell into silence after that. I knew exactly how it felt to have hell in your head, but then along came Mason and made it safe again. Was he trying to save me because he felt responsible for his mother somehow? The theory made sense.
I was always so worried about my own issues, I never stopped to wonder who helped him through his. Maybe we really were alike.
“Why did you lie the other day?” I kept my voice low.
“Because you need him to think you’re playing along. And…the person you’re looking for won’t help you in the long run. If you really want some answers, check the living room.”
“Why would you—“
“He’s coming,” he interjected, raising a glass to his mouth to play off his warning.
“Do you paint, too?” I swiftly changed the subject, blurting out the first thing that popped into my head.
“Do I…?” He shook his head and laughed, “No, angel, I just work the Red Rooms.”
“The Red Rooms?” It sounded like the name of a cheap porno.
“You’ll have to ask Mason about them.” He winked a silver eye at me and walked across the room as Mason approached.
Sure—I’d just pencil that in under question four-hundred that he had yet to answer.