Two
Claire
“I can’t believe your Daddy didn’t realize how sick you were,” I growled, slamming my fist against the steering wheel as I took the bumpy mountain roads too fast. I had some other choice words for Chuck, but I wasn’t going to say them in front of Ella. For all my issues with the guy, he was her dad and everything I’d read about raising a child with separated parents said not to bad mouth the other parent in front of the kid. So it’s hard, but I had to do my best to not call him all the names that were floating up and burning the tip of my tongue.
She spent the whole day with him and he never once realized she was sick at all, let alone that her fever was over a hundred degrees. How was it even possible to be that unobservant when caring for a four year-old? Did he supervise her at all the entire day, or did he just plop her in front of some cartoons to ignore her?
My teeth ground together as I forced back another growl. Could I even trust him with our daughter?
When I picked her up, I immediately saw something was wrong. She was too sleepy, she was hot, and she was coughing a lot. She woke up long enough to tell me she didn’t feel good and that she threw up. I glared at Chuck, holding her tight.
“You didn’t know she threw up?” I’d hissed at him.
He just shrugged. “Was busy in the garage.”
“She’s your daughter and you were too busy with a car to notice that she’s sick?” It was all I could do to keep the shriek out of my voice, to keep it low enough not to disturb Ella from her fitful sleep. But Chuck had nothing to say for himself — as usual.
“Yeah, well, she’s your daughter too, and where were you all day?”
“At work,” I’d spat at him. “I have to make a living because the hundred dollars a month in child support sure as hell isn’t going to pay our bills.”
“I pay what the court said I need to. You got a problem with the amount, you take it up with the judge,” he snapped back.
I just shook my head, pinching the bridge of my nose. “It’s not about the money, Chuck. I just want you to be her freaking dad.”
“I let you bring her here three days a week, don’t I?”
“Yes, Chuck. You let me drop our daughter off to spend time with you. How generous of you.”
“Maybe I shouldn’t if you’re going to be such a bitch about it every time you come to get her.”
“You know what, I don’t have time for this. I need to get her to a doctor. She’s burning up.”
Whatever he’d said to me next, I just ignored as I got Ella strapped into her booster seat and pressed a quick kiss to her forehead.
“Mommy’s going to make sure you’re feeling better soon, baby girl. I’m sorry it took so long.”
She was mostly asleep, but murmured something so weak and vulnerable that it made my heart break and made me want to turn around and let Chuck have it all over again. But I’d already told him there was no time. The only doctor on the mountain was only open until seven and it was already twenty ‘til.
Which is why I was racing down the bumpy roads, driving recklessly, praying a deer didn’t jump out in front of me because I’d have no real time to stop. Because he was the only doctor around unless I wanted to take the two and a half hour drive down the mountain. And I wasn’t sure how bad Ella’s fever really was. I didn’t know how long she’d had it. And I knew with kids her age, time is of the essence. Those couple extra hours to get down the mountain could be more than we had.
So I just hoped and prayed that the doctor would still be in his office, that he didn’t decide to close up shop early — not uncommon in these parts; when business was slow or the weather was nice, it was common to find signs on shop doors saying they’d closed early. There was more pressure on the doctor to stay open, I’d guess, but that didn’t really mean a whole lot.
And I’d never been to this doctor, so I really didn’t know if he was the type to abide by his hours or not. I just had to hope. I still remembered when he opened up his practice about a year ago. Folks were really excited to have a doctor up on the mountain, but I didn’t exactly have insurance being a small business owner and the hospital had a program for Ella to get all her shots and stuff, so I’d never had any reason to visit until this cropped up. A real emergency.
I still just couldn’t believe Chuck didn’t notice a thing. I knew it was too late to be mad about it at this point, but I was fuming. Even if he didn’t want to stop his work in the garage to take her in, he could have called me and I would have closed up the shop early to take her to the doctor. And then I wouldn’t be worried about him being closed or having to take a late-night drive down the mountain while my baby’s running a temperature and throwing up.
Luckily, she hadn’t done that again yet, but she’d warned me of the possibility and I was on high alert with a shopping bag at the ready.
“We’re almost there, baby,” I said to her as she whimpered in her sleep. I was probably trying to reassure myself more than her. If I let go of my anger at Chuck, all I was left with was worry for Ella. And anger was more familiar. Easier to deal with. The fear… well, there was nothing I could really do about that. I was helpless in this situation and it made me feel like a terrible mother.
I turned down the winding gravel path that led to Dr. Bradford’s office, my heart in my throat, my fingers clenching the steering wheel with white knuckles. “Please, please, please,” I muttered, peering through the thick cover of evergreens, trying to spot the building through the dim moonlight.
Finally, my lights fell on the parking lot and I let out a sigh of relief. There was another vehicle there. Hopefully, that meant the doctor was in.
But just as I rounded the corner, the lights in the building went off. I saw the man leaving the office, closing the door behind him, and his car lights coming on as he unlocked it.
I had no choice. I gunned the engine and skidded to a stop, dust flying up everywhere around the SUV, but I didn’t care. In the space of a heartbeat, I’d flung off my seat belt, jumped out of the driver’s seat and was already unfastening Ella from her booster seat.
I think it was the fastest I’d ever moved in my life, but I couldn’t let him leave. I hefted Ella up, settling her on my hip, holding her close to my chest as I ran around the car.
“Wait!” I cried into the still summer night. “Please, wait!”
From my vantage point, I could see his broad shoulders stiffening and tension entering his whole body. I prepared myself for a fight. If he wanted to leave without seeing my baby, he had another thing coming.
But then he turned toward me and all thoughts of fighting fled my mind. I don’t know what I was expecting from the doctor with his private practice on the mountain. Maybe a geriatric who’d had enough of dealing with people and traffic — not this young, muscular guy with shaggy brown hair and piercing dark eyes. Even in the low light of the parking lot, I saw those eyes boring into me and a part of me melted, making my knees sag as I fought to support the dead weight of my toddler.
“I’m already closed,” he said, his voice gruff and deep, manly in a way that sent shivers down my spine. How had I never seen this guy around town before?
I shook my head, ridding it of those completely out-of-place thoughts. Ella. I needed to think about Ella.
“Please,” I said, taking a step toward him, blocking off his exit path. “It’s my daughter. She’s got a fever and—”
The words died on my lips as I met his gaze. He was looking at me strangely, like he saw more of me than he should, and it made me want to shrink back, run back to my car, and get the hell out of here. But I couldn’t. I needed him to see Ella. So I swallowed my pride, swallowed past the lump in my throat, and stood my ground.
“You’re the only doctor on the mountain and she’s my baby. Please. I’ll pay you whatever you want.” I didn’t mention that it would probably take me months to pay him back. That was a detail that wasn’t necessary right then. I just needed him to agree to see her. And I needed his attention to turn away from me, so I could stop squirming.
He sighed and looked from me down to Ella, taking a step forward.
Instantly I was hit with the warm, masculine scent of him. Pine and earth, manly musk and nature all mixed together. It was enough to make me a little light-headed, but I shook it off, looking down at my daughter to remind myself to keep it together.
I didn’t even know what it was about him. Yeah, he was attractive and the deep timbre of his voice did really unsettling things to my insides, but he was still just a man. I dealt with them every single day at the shop.
And yeah, there hadn’t been anyone since Chuck. Since three and a half years ago when he decided, no, actually being a dad full-time didn’t sound so fun after all. Also, apparently he was only with me out of obligation since I’d gotten pregnant, so all I had to say to him on his way out was ‘good riddance.’
But Ella loved her Daddy. At least when he was around and paying attention to her — which, to be honest, was not a lot. So I tried to play nice with him. I tried to make sure he got all his visitation. I tried to include him on family outings and holidays, but then he did shit like this and I wondered why the hell I bothered. Clearly, I was the only one that cared about Ella and her having a relationship with him, so after this, I wasn’t so sure I was going to bother any more.
The doctor reached down and rested the back of his hand on Ella’s warm forehead, then his brow furrowed. For a moment, I’d forgotten he was there, lost in my anger about Chuck again. Well, that was at least one thing he was good for. At least now I wasn’t pining over the cute doctor. Remembering all the crap Chuck put me through was enough to firm my ‘screw men’ attitude for quite some time.
Without saying anything, Dr. Bradford — at least I assumed this was him — turned and unlocked the office door, flipping the lights on as he walked in.
“Well, come on,” he said after I didn’t immediately follow him in. “Let’s take a look at her.”
I finally let out the breath I’d been holding the whole way down the mountain, sighing with relief and feeling like I might sink to the floor in a puddle now that the tension was gone.
“Thank you,” I said over and over again as he turned on lights, led us back to an examining room, and pried Ella away from me to sit on the elevated papered seat.