Chapter 40
Elizabeth
I lay on the bed and stared at the tiled ceiling. The baby and I would be okay. The cramps were caused by my womb stretching and the spotting, my doctor said, was nothing to be concerned about, but he wanted me to stay in hospital for a few days because I was dehydrated and, by the looks of it, exhausted.
He was right, I was. For the past few weeks, I'd been pushing myself to the point of collapse. If I was exhausted at the end of the day, I could fall into bed and fall asleep without dreaming about Caden.
My father strode into the room, and for the first time in my life, I saw worry lines on his face.
He held his cap in his hand. "Why didn't you tell me you were pregnant?"
"You would have known soon enough."
"After everything he's done to you, you're keeping his baby?" The disgust in his voice left me more nauseous than morning sickness.
"Why would you ask a question like that? Of course I'm keeping my baby. This is your grandchild. Your flesh and blood." My blood pressure skyrocketed, and I sucked in a deep breath to calm down. "Please leave, Dad. Thanks for coming but I don't need any stress right now."
"You really love him, didn't you?"
No more lying. No more pretending. "More than you can imagine. I thought he felt the same."
"How could he, after the way your marriage began? It was based on lies. He used you to get what he wanted."
"Then I'm surprised you don't like him. He's just like you. All your life you've used me as a pawn against mom in the game you won't stop playing. As someone who ran your business. As someone to pick up the pieces for you." I sat up. "I can't do it anymore, Dad. I'm done." I laid my hands across my stomach. "My baby needs me, and I'll be the best mom I can. I don't want you or your toxic influence in my life. The club isn't my priority anymore. My baby is."
His face turned several shades of red, but I didn't care if he exploded. He could yell and shout all he wanted. He could call her me every and any name. He could use emotional blackmail, he could threaten, he could cajole. I was done.
"I give you a week before you come crawling back. I should have made him stay in your life. He didn't even fight for you when I told him to go. Is that the kind of man you want in you want?"
A bucket of ice water thrown over my head would have been less shocking than his words. "What do you mean you told him to go? What did you do?"
"It doesn't matter." He made a move to walk out of the room.
"Don't you dare leave. If you have any love for me, you'll tell me what you did." I flung my feet over the side of the bed and stood. My heart lodged in my throat. Why didn't I see it before? Of course my dad would have had something to do with Caden's abrupt departure. His fingerprints were all over this.
He put his hand on the door but seemed to hesitate.
"Dad, I mean it if you don't tell me what the hell you did, we're finished. You'll never see your grandchild or me. You'll be on your own."
He didn't face me when he spoke. "It was for your own good. A man like him wouldn't have stuck around long. He would have hurt you eventually. Better to rip the Band-Aid off quickly."
"Dad." My patience was thread thin and ready to snap.
His shoulders sagged, but he still didn't look at me. "I told him if he didn't leave, I would send immigration everything I had. Emails and recorded phone calls. I would have him thrown out of the country if he didn't give me back the club."
"You forced him out of my life? You would have had me arrested for fraud? Thrown into prison all for the club? All for money? So it was you who called immigration. You're the reason we were questioned at the airport and had a visit from the officer."
"I swear I didn't do that. And I wouldn't have given any information to anyone. He double-crossed me, and I wanted back what was mine."
Breathing was so hard it hurt my lungs.
"Leave. Get out. I hope the club falls around your ears."
He faced me and rolled his eyes. "Don't go get hysterical. Everything I did was for you."
"Get out."
The door swung open and pushed my dad out of the way. A wide-eyed Caden stood there in a rumpled suit, and my heart reached for him.
"You're too late," my dad spat. "I told her everything." He left the room in a huff and slammed the door.
Caden strode to my bedside. "Are you okay? What happened? I'm sorry. I—"
"Did you leave because of him?" I asked.
"No. Yes." He ran his fingers through his already messy hair. "I did it because I was afraid of what would happen to you if I stayed. I was scared of what he would do. He has enough on me to ruin my career. Everything I've worked for. We both would've gotten into serious trouble. I didn't want that for you."
"So leaving me broken was a better choice." I wouldn't cry. I wouldn't show him how much I wanted him. How much I loved him. Maybe my dad was right. Maybe I was better off without him.
"I was a coward. I was wrong. I miss you desperately. I don't want the club or anything to do with it. I only want you. I want us. I want to come home to you at night. I'm sick of traveling, sick of always being on the move. I want to wake up beside you. Go to sleep beside you."
Every word he said were the words I longed to hear, but he was too late. If he wanted me like he said he did he would have come back weeks ago. He would never have left.
"I love you, Caden, but I don't want you. I want someone who'll fight for me. You didn't fight for me. You walked away."
"What do I have to do to prove I'm sorry? I'm the biggest arsehole there is. I made a mistake, and I'll spend the rest of my life making that up to you."
God, I wanted to hold him. To tell him everything was okay. But after everything he'd said, he still hadn't said he loved me. That he'd meant it when he whispered the words into my ear.
"Please leave."
"I'm not going anywhere."
The door opened, and a nurse walked in. If she noticed the tension in the air, she didn't acknowledge it.
"This must be Dad. Your wife gave us a scare, but thankfully she and the baby are going to be just fine."
"Baby?" His eyes widened in disbelief. "You're having a baby?"
"Oh," the nurse said. "Sorry. Looks like I put my foot in it. I'll leave the two of you alone. I'll come back later."
I couldn't look at him. I didn't want to see his expression.
"Where you going to tell me?" His voice was quiet.
"I know you don't want to have children, but I do. I was planning on telling you as soon as I knew everything would be okay. I wouldn't have kept you from the baby's life. I want her to know she was loved and was created in love." My tears began to flow. "I want her to know your family and the love they have to give."
He cupped a hand over his mouth. "What happened? Why are you here?"
"Cramps and bleeding. I thought I was losing her. I've never wanted anything in my life as much, and if I'd lost her, I was afraid I would have lost myself."
"Let me come home, Lizzie. Let me look after you. I want you and I want our baby. I didn't know how much I wanted a family with you until now."
I shook my head. "Like I said I wouldn't keep you from her life, but I can't have you in mine. When the baby's born, we'll figure out visitations. I won't divorce you until you become a naturalized citizen. That's the extent of what I can do for you." I stretched and faked a yawn. "I need to get some sleep."
"I might not have fought for you before, but I'm going to fight for you and for our baby. I'm part of your life forever even if you don't want it. I'll make you love me again."
"Loving you isn't the problem."