Chapter Nineteen
Brent
#twinsies
It had been almost a month since I discovered we were having twins. Twins. As if one little soldier escaping its latex prison wasn’t miraculous enough, I had two. We still didn’t know the sex, but we had two sacs so it could be so many variations. Two little boys who looked just like Jay, or maybe two little girls with my eyes, or one of each.
But, first, I had to keep them in and healthy, and that was harder than expected.
Jay checked my blood pressure daily, and it never went down. It wasn’t super high, but apparently it was supposed to be on the low side about now so while he pretended not to be worried, he was piss-poor at hiding it.
At least we were into finals time at school, so that stress could be put to rest. I didn’t have any finals to take, per se, only my thesis, which was done, but I had to administer and grade finals for the classes I TAed for, and that was hella stressful.
Also adding to my stress was Joaquim. Not that he tried to. But I’d heard the doctor offered him a job a month ago, and never once had he mentioned it. I didn’t know if it was because it was OB and that just wasn’t his thing, or if he didn’t want to put down deep roots.
And I was too scared to ask.
I’d grown accustomed to seeing him daily and frankly, dependent on it. I wanted to ask him to move in with me and out of my mom’s garage apartment. But, again—too much of a chicken butt.
He knocked on my door before coming inside. At least there was that. He was using the key, even if he did still insist on knocking.
“Hey, sexy. I came to see how my three favorite people are doing.” He kissed my belly before taking my lips. “Now, let’s see how your heart and blood pressure are doing.”
This was the worst part of his visits. I knew it was necessary, but it only reminded me that every day my babies were at risk, an invisible risk at that. I was just glad to have him around to check it for me.
“I’m pretty sure kissing me senseless doesn’t lower my heart rate.” I was postponing the inevitable and necessary but not completely wrong. He had my heart racing and my stomach filled with butterflies. I hoped those things never went away. “Maybe check my BP first then kiss me next time.” Not that I wanted to wait for the fun part.
“I’m pretty sure if that is kissing you senseless raises your heart rate then your bar is too low, and I need to show you better.” I waited for him to slink over and raise that bar, but instead he reached for the BP cuff he left on my counter and after that picked up his stethoscope. No pharmacy “inaccurate pieces of inconsistent garbage” for me.
“Let’s get this over with.” I sighed as I plopped at the kitchen table.
“You say that likes it’s torture.” Jay didn’t understand. Or maybe he did. He had this way of slipping into nurse mode where all his emotions were gone, and he was all chipper and calm. To someone who didn’t know him, it would come across as warm, yet professional. I knew it meant he was schooling himself.
“It kind of is. I keep doing more to be better, and yet—boom, every time it is a little bit higher. I don’t want to break our babies.”
“Shhh, love. You aren’t going to break our babies.” He opened the cuff and wrapped it around my arm, the warmth of his fingers calming me. “Worse comes to worst, you take a little pill and stop working.”
I had a feeling that was far from the worst-case scenario.
“But rent and food.” My savings were down to about four dollars, thanks to doctor copays and graduation fees. Who charges people to be done with school they already paid for?
“All things your alpha can provide.”
My heart skipped a beat, and I was instantly grateful he wasn’t inflating the darn cuff yet. He always did that. Let it sit there so my anxiety was a bit less by the time he took it.
“Are you my alpha?” I asked, wanting it to be true. We’d never been official, and my hormonal craziness had me second-guessing all things at all times. “For true?”
“For true.” Jay kissed my forehead before going forehead to forehead and nose to nose with me. “Did you not know that? I have been slacking in the making-you-feel-like-a-king category?”
“It’s just that I know you were offered a job, but you never even told me.” And out it came. Finally. I felt better just getting it out there. He sat in the chair in front of me, scooching it closer.
“You heard the doctor that first day.”
I nodded at his not question.
“And you have been holding onto that.”
Another nod.
“No wonder your blood pressure has been high. Listen, Brent, and hear my words. I am staying in Mapleville.” He cupped my cheeks. “I’m trying to figure out the hows and such, but I am figuring it out. I didn’t tell you about that job because it didn’t feel right. But I know someplace is, and when I find it we will discuss it—you and me together.”
He was staying. Here. With me.
“Why didn’t you tell me you heard us talking?”
My voice cracked as I answered. “Because you need to do what’s right for you. I can’t be selfish.”
“You, my omega, are a great many things. Selfish is far from one of them. And what is right for me is to be here with you and our babies.”
Our babies. Best two words in the English language.
“I hate when you leave at night.” A tear escaped my ear and he wiped it with his thumb. Yeah, the BP was going to suck, but this was so very much worth it. We needed this talk if we were going to be okay long-term. I’d just been too much of a chicken, unlike my alpha who always put it out there.
“I hate it, too.” He grazed my lips with his, not quite a kiss, but with such affection it nearly overwhelmed me. Or that could be hormones, but still.
“So maybe move in here?” I asked what I’d wanted to ask since he left that blasted hotel, even when I thought it was too selfish to even dream of it.
“Or maybe you move in with me?”
I barked out a laugh. Umm no.
“I very much don’t want to move back to my mom’s.” Ever, ever, ever. I loved her with all my heart, but we did much better when we saw each other at will and not because we had to. I lived in an apartment near the florist.
“I was thinking more of us looking at some small houses.”
“I can’t afford that. When the baby comes, I can’t even afford this, not really.” The harsh truth that was my life.
“Please.” He made the puppy-dog eyes. Those darn things always worked. “Pleeeeeease?”
“Are you begging?” I tapped his nose.
“Pretty much, yeah.” He smirked. Sexy alpha. “So is that a yes?”
“That’s a we can explore the idea after you find a job.” Because as much as I wanted to say yes, there was a lot to consider, especially with my barely over minimum wage, not really full-time gig contingent on grant funding.
“I’ve found four.”
“Four what?” Surely he couldn’t mean he had four jobs because four jobs meant I’d never see him, and he was doting and available pretty much whenever I wasn’t working.
“I found four but am not sure if any is the right one.”
I knew he was good at his job, but four offers was wow.
“Now, let’s put that on the back burner. I want to make sure you three are okay. My alpha tendencies are riding me hard knowing I am responsible for making sure you are healthy.”
I agreed and he noted my blood pressure before taking the cuff off, fiddling with it, and trying it on my other arm before having me lie on my left side with my eyes closed as he rubbed my feet and trying a third time.
“Okay, then.” He wrapped the cuff up, speaking in that darn nurse voice. It couldn’t be good. “So, we are going to take a little ride now.”
Fuck.
“That bad?” Not that I wanted to know, but I kind of needed to. Or maybe I didn’t. It wasn’t like I could fix anything. I’d already been doing all I could.
“No, but I want triage to check you out.”
Liar. It was that bad. Maybe worse.