Epilogue

Ainsley

White lights twinkle overhead. White roses and silver accents decorate the room.

I smile as the couple next to Abel and me recite their vows. Today is bittersweet. I’m here physically but emotionally I am dead inside. I am far away from here trapped in my own head. Living in that fantasy of Axel and me living a different life in Italy. Green fields of rolling vines stretching as far as my eyes can see.

My veil is lifted, and I blink as Abel smiles at me. “I do,” he promises, and I robotically repeat the words. Before I know it, he’s kissing me and for the tiniest moment I allow myself to pretend I am kissing his brother instead. I’m back in Texas next to the fire as Axel caresses my cheek. His lips are on mine. His fingers biting into my hips as he drives into me over and over again.

A chorus of cheers and whistles erupts inside the church. We follow Harley and Reaper down the aisle and to the party being thrown instead of a reception at the Roadhouse.

I can’t stop thinking of Axel and wishing he were here. His lips on my neck, whispering that he’s with me all the way. I can feel the ghost of his touch on me but then I realize it’s Abel leading me to the dance floor for our first dance. My new husband grins at me, he doesn’t have a care in the world. Half of his heart isn’t locked up in a cell somewhere.

I bite back my tears and offer him the best smile I can afford.

“My brother wants you to be happy and enjoy life, Ainsley.”

“I know.” I lean up and kiss his cheek. “Thank you for doing this. I’m sure I’m not your first choice.”

“You’re not so bad.” He dips his head down, staring into my eyes and I can see that he wants me. Warmth pools in my belly and he captures my mouth with his. It feels all wrong and yet I return his kiss hoping for something to spark me back to life.

The song ends, and he leads me to a table where I watch his sister, Harley, get her new husband’s Devil mark tattooed on her arm.

“Where do you want yours?” Abel murmurs in my ear.

“Mine?”

“Yeah. You are getting my mark too. It symbolizes our union and that you’re mine.”

My mind drifts to hearing Axel say I was his on the side of the road.

The wind blowing around us as he kissed me on the hood of my car.

I blink hearing the buzzing of the tattoo gun. I can still feel Axel’s fingertips burning into my hip. “Right here.” I bring Abel’s fingers to the spot that won’t stop tingling hoping and praying that something makes it stop. Like putting his name on me where his brother’s should be.

Abel grins at me. He is handsome but he’s still not Axel. He called me this morning and told me to forget about him. To leave the stolen moments we shared behind me and to move on with Abel. He said it was all he wants of me.

I don’t know how to let him go.

I don’t want to but what else is a girl to do.

I gotta do the best I can to survive.

I take up the spot on the tabletop where Harley was, and Abel lifts the skirt of my dress bunching it in his fist so that some guy named JT can put his ink on me.

The tattoo gun starts up again once he has changed out the needle and gotten fresh ink.

I close my eyes as Abel is at my neck, his lips moving against my ear telling me how pretty I look tonight.

I concentrate on his voice instead of the stinging of the needle going in my skin.

The air in the room seems to disappear and I can feel his eyes on me. My eyes pop open and I stare across the room seeing a shadow disappear as someone goes out the front door.

I go to move to chase after him, but the guy is still tattooing me. All my breath is sucked out of me and I feel dizzy.

“Are you okay?” Abel questions, taking my face between his hands.

“I thought I saw someone.”

“He isn’t here.”

“I know. It’s just…”

“I miss him too.” Abel kisses my cheek and I blink back my tears and suck in a deep breath. I’ve got to let Axel go as much as it kills me to do so. I have to take my feelings for him and lock them down tight and forget where I put the damn key, or I won’t survive.

“All done,” JT announces rubbing some antibiotic cream on my hip and slapping a bandage on my tender skin.

“Yeah. We are.” I stare at the door knowing that Axel is gone and not coming back any time soon.