HEAL MY HEART

Chapter 1

Colin McGrath was a loyal man, he trusted the king with his life.  The king after all had taken in the young orphan boy and kept him alive for many years.  A loyalty like that will do just about anything for the person they feel bound too. 

He knew that was the reason the king had called him today.  Colin could feel something was brewing in the air; he just wasn’t sure what it was. 

“Colin, you know I love you like my own son.  So since Kaden is already betrothed I need to do this for me.”  King McDowell explained.

“Anything sire, you know I am your loyal warrior, I will do anything you command or even ask of me.”  Colin bowed before the man who he thought of like a father.

“The McCloud girl, Sarah, you and her will be married on Saturday this week.”  The king commanded.

Colin didn’t know what to say, he hadn’t expected this command.  He was thinking he would be ordered to sneak into enemy territory and kill the prince, or someone else just as important.  But to marry, the McCloud girl, he tried to think of which one it might be. 

They fought beside that clan often in the past.  Then he thought of one of them, I hope it isn’t her, he thought to himself.  “Yes sire.”  Colin said. 

He walked away from the king, thinking of what he could picture of the McCloud girl he could recall.  She was a mean woman.  He couldn’t think of a better way to describe her right off.  She wasn’t the most attractive woman in the region either.  Colin had always pictured himself with a lass that was strikingly beautiful. 

But he knew it wasn’t being asked of him to do this, but he was being told.  The only way to get out of this would be to leave the area, flee right now and in secret.  He would be left all alone, much like he had been for so many years of his life. 

For so many years of his life he had been alone.  He couldn’t even recall how long right off hand.  But it had seemed like forever to his young eyes.  Colin wasn’t even sure how he stayed alive all those years, “aye, it was pure luck I tell you.”  He whispered to himself as he thought back.

He had been a frail boy when the king had found him in that alley one day.  Colin wasn’t sure how he had been so lucky to be in the right place and at the right time that day.  But he had been and that day in time had changed his whole world in one moment.

Colin had watched from behind stone in the forest.  He had seen the two men from afar, could tell they were up to no good.  So he had quietly snuck in behind them, they hadn’t noticed him at all.

He could hear a horse approaching from the distance.  The men lowered down and seemed ready to attack something, or someone.  Two thoughts had passed through his mind at that moment.  One was that he should really help the person they were trying to rob.  The other was to help them and then somehow kill them later and get all the loot.

Colin would admit to a few people that the only reason he hadn’t chosen the second choice, was because he couldn’t kill them one on one.  But if he snuck up on them at the perfect moment, he could take one of them out.  That would leave the person coming alone with only one attacker to fend off.  It was a much better average that Colin would live through this event.  But the person who would be the victim might not live through the attack.  That would leave Colin with possible one person left to take out, the other attacker.  He could hope that this person would have been injured as well, and perhaps badly.  Colin could walk away with the valuable of three people, and a horse. 

So he had decided on the option of timing.  He quietly watched the two and listened as the horse came closer.  As the men jumped out, Colin seized that moment to throw the rock he had picked up.  His aim was perfect and he got the attention of the attacker.

Though his friend or partner had turned around at his noise, he continued on with their plan.  The other attacker’s attention was firmly drawn to the rider of the horse and not on Colin.  He smiled as the plan had worked perfectly. 

“Thank you fine lad, I think I might have been dead had you not come along.”  Colin had heard said behind him.

Turning around he had looked at the king for the first time.  He had been a very large man, Colin couldn’t have expected that, but he knew he would have to plan this just right. 

“I had been watching them for a bit out here.  Sometimes they fall asleep at night and leave some food by their fire.”  Colin admitted.

“Where is your family?  I think we should get you back to them.”  The king had said at that time.

“I’m an orphan sire.”  Colin had told the king.

“Then I’ll take you back with me.  You can live with us, and I’ll take care of you.  No child should be out here by themselves.  How old are you son, do you know?”  The king had asked.

“No sire, honestly I’ve been on my own for a while.  I think I was 5 when my parents left me on the streets.”  Colin explained.  He wasn’t really sure if they had left him, or simply died when they were robbing someone.  He couldn’t remember much at all about his parents. 

Now all these years later he felt like the king’s son.  He would gladly lay his life down for the king, no hesitation now.  Sometimes he would feel guilty for having considered robbing the king all those years ago.  But he knew it was just the type of boy he had grown up to be, not who he was when he was loved.

Colin had really felt like part of the family for so long now.  He felt it an honor that his king would ask of him something so important.  It must be an important ally to have.

He thought again of the various McCloud females he knew.  No matter how hard he tried, only one of them stood out in his mind.  She had been a fiery little thing, treating men like they were nothing.  He tried to remember more about her.  But the other thing that was bugging him about this marriage was that he had wanted someone special in his life. 

Colin had seen how the royal couple looked at each other.  He saw the admiration between them.  He really wanted to have that special closeness they seemed to share.  How was he going to have that with a girl he didn’t know? 

But his loyalty wouldn’t allow him to do anything but stay.  He had thought of it many times between the day he found out and Saturday.  However, here he was getting ready to marry Sarah McCloud.  He wasn’t even sure if he had even seen her before. 

Colin hoped she was at least attractive.  It would really be a pain to be stuck with someone he didn’t like, not even physically.  He had been with women in the past, so he knew he liked sex.  But he also knew that this girl had an advantage over him.  That was that she was the real daughter of her father.  Even though for the past 12 years he had lived like family, Colin knew that he was still an orphan in all honesty.

No matter how much the king had treated him like his own son through these years; the king would still not support him.  Not if Sarah would go up to him and tell the king Colin hadn’t been keeping me happy.  Not the type of conversation he would want to happen.

So he couldn’t upset this girl, or she would in essence, tell on him to her father.  Her father will get mad and tell the king, and that would be it.  Colin would learn just how little he meant to the king at that point.  He had felt love for so long; he didn’t want to see the disappointment in the king’s eyes.  But more than that was he wouldn’t want to hear the words of the king.  He could almost imagine it in the king’s voice.  “You let me down Colin.”  He heard in his mind.

“Hey are you about ready?”  Colin heard the king’s voice behind him.

“Yes sire I’m ready.”  Colin turned and went to get married.

He wouldn’t admit that he was completely petrified at that moment, but he was close to it.  Colin wanted to run more than anything at this moment.  But he kept walking and went to see his wife for the first time.

Colin walked in and looked at Sarah McCloud.  She was at least pretty. But she was short.  He had never seen her before that he could recall.  He looked at her, and she seemed just as nervous as he was, he could almost sense her thinking the same thoughts as him.  “Well it’s too late now, you have to do this.”  He could hear the sigh in his mind as he thought.

As the preacher spoke he studied Sarah.  She had long light brown hair, her eyes were a nice hazel, and she was quite a bit shorter than him. 

The ceremony was short, Colin said all the right things at the right times.  But he felt a moment of despair hit him.  Though she was pretty he really didn’t want a loveless marriage.  But he didn’t even know her yet,

“Here’s to the happy couple.”  Her father made a toast at the table. 

Colin lifted his glass to his lips and took a sip of the wine.  He looked at Sarah again; they hadn’t really said anything to each other yet.  He really found it strange that she hadn’t even asked him much.

“I’m sorry that you didn’t get to marry the king’s son.”  Colin whispered.  He knew that every girl in the kingdom wanted to marry the king’s son.

He saw her laugh a little.  “I’m one of the few girl’s you’ll ever meet that will tell you this, but I wouldn’t have married him if I had the chance.”  She said and made a face. 

Colin couldn’t help but laugh out loud.  The table turned towards the couple and made a collective sigh.  “Well it’s great to see you two getting along so well!”  The king beamed at him, pride showing across his face.

At that moment Colin was happy he had married the girl.  Not just because of the pride he witnessed from the king, but from her as well.  Her comment had caught him so off guard he had no idea what to say.

After a few moments of hearty laughter, Colin turned to Sarah and smiled.  “Well you aren’t exactly what I expected.”  He didn’t know how else to put his thoughts.  He continued to shake his with no more words coming to his mind.  Colin knew he had to look like an idiot right now, but he couldn’t help it.  Her words had really tickled him. 

He had to wonder what more he would learn about his new bride next.  Colin had to honestly admit that he was looking forward to it.  He began to look at it as a game, one where he had to find the next nugget of Sarah.  To learn more about her mind, and her body, he thought as he looked at her lustfully.

Colin watched the red spread across her face at his look.  She looked away quickly a gasp of shock coming from her mouth quickly. 

“I’m sorry; I didn’t mean to, whatever I did, I’m sorry.”  He stuttered out.

Sarah looked at him.  “No it wasn’t you, I just had a, well I don’t know how to explain it.  Plus I don’t think this is the place to talk like this.”  She whispered in his ear.

Colin sat up straight as the feel of her lips close to his neck made his mind go straight to another world.  One where he pictured what her bare skin looked like under her clothes.  He knew this wasn’t something he could keep up long. 

Thankfully, she broke eye contact again and they both were smart enough to try and avoid looking at each other.  Colin hoped this celebration would be short.  He really wanted to see what was under his new wives clothes, and soon.