Chapter 18
Jake hadn’t slept beyond nine o’clock since he was an unemployed teenager. Kenna snored softly on her side, turned away from him, presenting a lovely view of her backside. Slowly, he drew the sheet over her and slid out of bed. Now what?
Mere hours ago, he’d experienced lovemaking like never before with a woman he desperately wanted to spend the rest of his life with. And couldn’t. At least not yet.
He needed to talk to someone he could trust, someone who wouldn’t judge and wouldn’t tell him he’d just thrown away a career he’d worked damn hard to achieve. With brains as scrambled as breakfast eggs he dialed his friend, Adam Michaels. They’d met at a training seminar, both Southern boys with an immediate connection. Adam was from Oklahoma and worked for a state agency but had been in a similar predicament. While he worked an undercover assignment, he became entangled with the woman he eventually married. Whether federal or state, undercover rules are the same and Adam had been suspended three months without pay despite both he and Valerie risking their lives to apprehend a serial arsonist. Like Jake was doing now, Adam had harbored Valerie in his undercover suite when she’d needed protection. And he’d fallen in love with Valerie. Same scenario for Jake.
Being “on the beach” was the FBI’s slang reference for a suspended agent. It meant time off without pay and a permanent page in his personnel file. Jake didn’t have near the years of experience that Adam had, nor the track record for solving major cases. No mitigating arguments to wage in his favor. Unlike Adam’s bosses, the FBI might simply terminate him. The question Jake faced was simple. Was Kenna worth it? Adam said that Valerie was.
After an hour conversation with Adam, Jake wasn’t any less certain about his course of action. He only knew one thing for sure: he couldn’t let Kenna go. The men promised to visit with their respective ladies and Adam hinted he might be able to secure a job with his own agency if Jake found himself unemployed. He and Valerie lived in Pittsburgh now. Would Kenna be willing to leave everything she knew and all her friends to follow him?
No sooner did he disconnect with Adam than Vinny called. Jake was glad he’d settled into the lounge chair out on the balcony for the phone calls so Kenna didn’t overhear the conversations. Vinny wanted Jake to make another set of collection runs with him.
“You’re like a good luck charm, man,” Vinny coaxed when Jake didn’t immediately commit to the evening. “Last time we only encountered that one problem and he made good the next day. Ever since you dragged me from the wreck, I’ve been sailing through life. It’s because of you, I can feel it. You gotta come tonight.”
He’d have the full day to spend with Kenna. Perhaps it was better if there wasn’t another night together. Reluctantly, he agreed but insisted it’d be later than usual.
When she finally appeared, Mackenna had showered and made up her face. The sliding glass door slid to the side and she stood in the opening, her hands locked in front of her.
“Hey, sugar. You look great. It’s past breakfast time but I’m starved. Brunch? Or lunch? Your choice.”
Mackenna cast her eyes downward and picked an imaginary spot on the top of her hand. “I think we should talk first. I feel like I owe you an apology but”—she paused, reluctant to look at him—“what happened . . . Well, you’re right. It changes things between us.” She stood wringing her hands.
Jake’s stomach dropped. “It must not be a change for the better. You can’t even look at me.”
Her head sprang up, and she focused on his face, causing him to immediately smile. “Much better, thank you. Listen, Kenna, what happened happened. It doesn’t have to happen again if you don’t want it to but I sure hope it does. But I don’t want to mess this thing up between us, whatever it is. How about we enjoy being together and let nature take its course. I’m a no-strings guy, remember?”
The slightest smile lifted the corners of her mouth. “I told you I’m a big girl, Jake. Having sex with you is not what has me off balance. It’s the way you made me feel. I totally lost myself in your arms. That’s what scares me.”
He rose and walked to her, taking her hands in his. “Well it scared me too. But neither one of us is in a position to start a new relationship so let’s not fret about it, okay?” His head lowered and he kissed her gently, the taste of toothpaste still lingering on her tongue.
“I’m going to shower, honey. And then I want to head to some all-you-can-eat diner. I’m starved. We should be able to move you in upstairs today before I go to work.”
Her eyes widened. “You have to work tonight?”
“Yeah. I hadn’t planned on it but something came up. See? There’s nothing to worry about. Tonight you’ll be in your own bed and I’ll be working so your virtue will be safe.”
He brushed past her before she could agree.
~ ~ ~
Hours later, Jake struggled to concentrate on Vinny’s ramblings. Mainly because every time he thought about Mackenna, he got hard. She was so easy to be with. Maybe it was because he wasn’t actually courting her, which allowed them to drop all pretenses and simply relax in each other’s company. But what passed between them in the wee hours of the morning brought them closer in little ways. Mackenna easily slid her hand into his as they walked. When he leaned and brushed crumbs from her cheek, she didn’t bristle. They tasted food off each other’s plates and playfully bumped shoulders as they shared corny jokes. He hadn’t wanted the afternoon to end.
Together, they relocated her clothes and personal items to the apartment two floors above his. He hated leaving her standing in the new place, piles of clothes and shoeboxes precariously balancing on every piece of furniture. Not that he would’ve helped her unpack. He simply wanted to be with her.
It made the evening with Vinny and his bimbos more intolerable than usual and Jake found himself snapping at the women to leave him alone. His short temper paid off when Vinny suggested he needed a good Italian meal to improve his mood and invited him to the next Cabacolli family dinner. Vinny wanted Jake to meet his father. The bosses at the Bureau would be thrilled. This was a giant leap for their investigation and this case could accelerate Jake’s career. And all he could think about was rushing back to Kenna.
He ended the night early by Vinny’s standards, and unlocked his apartment door shortly before two in the morning. The place seemed emptier than usual without her. By now, Mackenna likely was sound asleep. Even as he dialed her cell phone the thought that he shouldn’t be waking her crossed his mind. After all, she had to go to the bank in a couple of hours. And he? Well, he’d probably be headed to jail.